Too late for regrets (912 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.86 on 42 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by drogoroch (View user info) at 2007-04-10 09:01:42 EDT
April 2002 Oxford.
The sun shines down on the little hill we have found. A breeze blows and catches the corner of the blanket we lie on. An empty crisp packet, Walkers Cheese and onion, sees its opportunity for freedom and grasps it. Jumping up it catches the wind and starts to roll away down the hill.
Drogo: "Oh no you don't you little bastard."
I'm off after it. A slight damp spot moves itself under my foot and sends me skidding arse over tit down the rest of the slope. The crisp packet stops briefly, looking at me, before it hops off on its journey for pastures new. I look at it and decide that due to the effort I have already put in that it won't get away.
Drogo: "Come here little git. You don't get away that easy."
The sound of laughter follows me from the blanket.
The packet gets stuck on a log. I can see it shaking, trying desperately to free itself and continues its escape. I walk up to it with the nonchalance of a killer from a cheesy horror film; I know it's mine now, there is nowhere for it to go.
Drogo: "Gotcha."
I grab it and start the walk back up the hill. Holding it aloft I stand over her as she laughs. I stand like some all conquering hero as the sun shines down on me.
Jenny: "Well done; you're my hero. Now do you want the last Sandwich?"
I sit down and stuff the packet to the bottom of the basket; it shall not get away again. I look at her lying on the blanket and smile.
Drogo: "No I'm fine thanks. I will have some more juice though."
She sits up and takes my cup from my hand. She then fills it with the cool liquid and passes it back, before grabbing the last sandwich from the box between us.
Jenny: "I love days like this."
The wind catches her long auburn hair and it gets stuck to her sandwich. I laugh as she tries to free her hair from her sandwich and face. I reach forward and help her. With the hair free I look into her blues eyes and hold her face in my hands. I am kissing her before I realise it.
When I release her she smiles at me. The sandwich lies forgotten on her leg. The wind blows her hair out behind her and shows her beautiful neck off. I lean forward and kiss her behind the ear.
Drogo: "You may want to tie that back darling; that's if you intend to be able to eat that."
Jenny: "Yeah but if I do that I will have to fight you off for the rest of the day; I know what you get like when you see my neck."
I put on a sheepish look; whilst smiling. She takes a hair band from her wrist and puts her hair back. I look at the lines of her neck and lean forward again. With my lips inches away from her skin I move away and sit back.
Drogo: "Maybe not; seeing as you obviously don't want me too."
Jenny: "Come here you. That's not what I meant at all."
She leans over into my arms. The empty box is in the way and she throws it towards the basket. She lies in my arms and we kiss again. I hold to her; looking at her above me with the sun shining behind her.
Jenny: "Will we always do things like this my love?"
Drogo: "Of course my darling. Through the good and the bad we will always try and find time for things like this."
Promises are easy when the moments are right.
Jenny: "I love you so much."
Drogo: "I love you too my darling."
We stay for a few more hours. Talking, laughing and holding each other. We hold to it not wanting it to end.
But it has too; and you both know it.
With the sun sinking we pack up our things. I watch as she places the remnants of our day into the basket. The last vestige of the suns strength glints from the ring on her finger, the ring I gave her all those months ago.
The wind picks up around me and I hear it whisper to me.
Tell her.
She is looking at me with a frown on her face.
Jenny: "Are you okay darling?"
I shake my head and my focus comes back.
Drogo: "Yeah I'm fine; just kind of zoned out."
I tuck the blanket under my arm and pick up the basket. She links my arm as we walk down the hill and back to the car. As I reach the car I look back and see the hill perfectly framed by the dying sun.
It's the best for both of you.
A shiver runs down my spine.
--
April 7th 2007 Devon
The phone penetrates the fog of yet another hangover. The bank holiday weekend is going well already; and I'm only 2 days in. I pick it up without looking at who it is.
Drogo: "Yep?"
Andrew: "Hello is that Drogo?"
Drogo: "It is I; who's this?"
A breeze blows my curtains in. They rattle around and I get up to close the window.
Andrew: "Hi Drogo it's Andrew; I don't know if you remember me? I'm Jenny's father."
Remember
I slam the window closed; and stand bemused at why my ex fiancés father would be calling me.
--
August 2002 Portsmouth
Jenny: "But I don't understand. I love you isn't that enough?"
She sits on the bed with tears streaming from her eyes. Tissue is hanging from her hand.
Drogo: "It just isn't working. I don't know what it is specifically. I'm just not ready for this anymore. I need to get away. I want to live abroad; and you have said that you don't want to. Also I just can't deal with your fucking parents anymore. Especially your dad. He is constantly involving himself in our business. I feel like I can't crap without first asking him.
Jenny: "I know, I know. I'm sorry. He just cares about us. I will try not to talk to him as much, I promise. We will do our own thing and not involve them."
Drogo: "It's more than that Jenny. You know it as well as I do. I really am sorry but this has to happen."
Jenny: "I love you."
Drogo: "I just don't think I can say that back anymore; sorry.
I leave. We do talk a few times but it becomes painful so we stop. She sends letters and I never reply. I actually stop opening them.
--
April 7th 2007
Drogo: "Yeah; Hi Andrew. It's been a while. Must be almost 5 years I guess. Um.... So what can I do for you?"
Andrew: "Well there has been an accident."
I can hear this man, who I always despised as weak, holding in emotion. His voice is trembling as he talks.
Drogo: "What do you mean Andrew? Is everyone alright? Is Jenny okay?"
Andrew: "She never forgot you. She always hoped that things could be sorted out between you. I know part of the problem was me; she told me that, I'm sorry for getting in the way all the time."
Drogo: "Andrew; that's all in the past. What has happened? What accident?"
Andrew: "She's dead Drogo. My darling girl is dead. Some bastard killed her in a car."
The emotion over takes him. I find that I am sitting on the floor of my room. I look to my bed and see the red hair lying on my pillow; I can see the pale skin of her neck.
Drogo: "Oh shit Andrew I'm so sorry. Christ I'm so fucking sorry. Anything I can do, anything"
I feel the tears forming at the corner of my eyes.
Andrew: "We want you to come to the funeral Drogo. We both would like you there."
I kneel on the floor as he continues. I'm no longer listening.
My mind is filled with a hill bathed in sunshine.
User Reviews
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-09-12 16:31:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-04-10 10:33:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck.
This nearly made me cry.
Chin up.
holy shit.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2007-09-11 16:45:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by orph (user info) at 2007-04-11 15:20:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-04-11 08:23:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Antioxident (user info) at 2007-04-11 07:50:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by odin (user info) at 2007-04-11 07:29:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-04-11 05:51:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wonderful
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-04-11 04:23:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
that sucks.
fuck you for making me feel emotion.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-04-11 04:01:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Dance.With.The.Devil. (user info) at 2007-04-11 00:32:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
how did I miss THIS gem?
--
Well evidently you didn't Desolate Mate; seeing as it was still on the front page waiting for you.
So how is life treating you, you miserable excuse for life? Hopefully you're well. I was gutted when you didn't come around anymore.
Hopefully see you later. Love and Kisses.
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2007-04-11 03:45:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Drogo, check your inbox....
Submitted by Dance.With.The.Devil. (user info) at 2007-04-11 00:32:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
how did I miss THIS gem?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-04-10 20:56:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh my god, Drogo..I'm so sorry..
This was such a beautiful piece..it's no wonder there was such wonderful imagery now that I read it is true.
You're doing the right thing, obviously. I know it must be a sad time for you; my sympathies.
Submitted by Void_Where_Prohibited (user info) at 2007-04-10 16:59:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well written.
I'm sorry for the loss to all.
*hugs*
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-04-10 15:43:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
bummer.
well written though
Submitted by MidnightToSix (user info) at 2007-04-10 15:29:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-04-10 14:59:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh jesus....
:(
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-04-10 14:50:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jesus Christ, Drogo. Beautifully written, sorry for your loss. I have something in my eye...
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-04-10 14:47:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Um... this was very well written???
fuck.
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2007-04-10 14:30:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2007-04-10 12:15:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-04-10 12:14:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:34:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:27:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice imagery.
Enjoyed the contrasting storyline.
Hope to Christ this didn't actually happen to you.
--
If only it hadn't.
=====================
Jesus, mate. Don't know what to say about that...
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2007-04-10 11:55:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-04-10 11:30:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
IF ANY OF YOU FUCKS HAD A HEART, YOU'D STAND IN THE 'GIVE DROGO FACE' LINE. IT'S JUST ONE FUCKING COCK IN YOUR MOUTH.
JEESUS, FOR FUCKS SAKE, YOU GUYS DON'T HAVE A HEART.
*CHIN SHOT*
FUCK THAT, I'M GOING AGAIN. GET IN LINE, METHOD.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2007-04-10 11:20:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Really tuggin' on those heart strings, ain't ya Drogo!
This really got to me, +2 old chap, jolly good show.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-04-10 11:13:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Didn't have to read it.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-04-10 11:06:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-04-10 10:50:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-04-10 10:42:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Any parents worth their salt will tell you that their worst fear is the idea that they could lose a child. Cry with them.
Fuck.
====
word
--
Agreed
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-04-10 10:50:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-04-10 10:42:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Any parents worth their salt will tell you that their worst fear is the idea that they could lose a child. Cry with them.
Fuck.
====
word
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-04-10 10:42:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Any parents worth their salt will tell you that their worst fear is the idea that they could lose a child. Cry with them.
Fuck.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-04-10 10:33:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck.
This nearly made me cry.
Chin up.
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2007-04-10 10:33:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hi drogo.
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-04-10 10:17:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
For some reason this reminded me of American Beauty...
I love that movie.
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2007-04-10 10:11:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
just one petty thing
crisps (UK)= chips (USA)
... most in the US or Canada won't know this.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:53:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:45:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck...
How is one supposed to feel when tragedy befalls someone we once knew and loved?
Do we let it wash over us and go on with our lives?
Do we punish ourselves for not feeling more than we do?
Do we rail against the macabre unfairness of a life taken before its time?
I don't know.
Sometimes, when I really think about it, I am overwhelmed by all the heartache in the world.
--------------
RUB SOME DIRT ON IT!
and
WALK IT OFF!
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:50:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:45:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck...
How is one supposed to feel when tragedy befalls someone we once knew and loved?
Do we let it wash over us and go on with our lives?
Do we punish ourselves for not feeling more than we do?
Do we rail against the macabre unfairness of a life taken before its time?
I don't know.
--
Personally i believe I gave up my right to feel the unfairness of it and to wail and the injustice.
She was a lovely lady; and I shall always remember her. Just not looking forward to the funeral much. But hey ho; time to man up a bit. Feel very bad for her parents.
Just feels odd to have someone; whom I was intimate with and who was younger than me, die. Very strange; that shit shouldnt happen at my age.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:49:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, I don't know what else to tell you other than you get blowjobs without any expectation from me all week.
YOU HEAR THAT UBERVERSE?
DROGO IS GETTING 'NO-STRINGS-ATTACHED' MOUTH HUGS FROM ME ALL WEEK!
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:45:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck...
How is one supposed to feel when tragedy befalls someone we once knew and loved?
Do we let it wash over us and go on with our lives?
Do we punish ourselves for not feeling more than we do?
Do we rail against the macabre unfairness of a life taken before its time?
I don't know.
Sometimes, when I really think about it, I am overwhelmed by all the heartache in the world.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:34:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:27:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice imagery.
Enjoyed the contrasting storyline.
Hope to Christ this didn't actually happen to you.
--
If only it hadn't.
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:27:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice imagery.
Enjoyed the contrasting storyline.
Hope to Christ this didn't actually happen to you.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:22:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:15:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wow
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:09:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I genuinely don't know what to say.
Sorry? Somehow it's just not fitting.
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2007-04-10 09:07:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2