HATEMADNESS: Orgasmatron (probably NSFW, if you work for mormons) (2244 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 1.87 on 70 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (View user info) at 2007-05-18 13:49:57 EDT
Dear Orgasmatron,
First off, your fricking name tells us that you're compensating for some other shortcoming. Just 'fess up and say that you never even given a woman an orgasm...men, that's a different story. At least that's what caulaincourt said. But he mentioned a bunch of little yappy dogs and lots of peanut butter.
Another thing, what the fuck is up with all the poetry? You think that you're the Fresh Fucking Prince of Uber-Bel-Air? Do I care? Should we stare? Would that be fair? OH, looky, I made a rhyme. TEE HEE. Shut up you retarded Dr. Seuss wannabe.
Perhaps I should tell Uber about the numerous animal rights violations that you have recieved for shaving gerbils and forcing them into your rectum. Or worse yet, that you unleashed that shit-sucking poetry contest onto us?
What will Orgamsmatron post next? Will it be:
-A renaissance picture, with poetry pasted onto it?
-A bunch of name-dropping tombstones?
-More crappy poetry?
-A lameass contest?
-Somebody else's bandwagon?
I hope that you get ass rabies and your fingers fall off. That way we won't have to endure any more of your drivel, Jughead.
Love,
BOB
User Reviews
Submitted by JohnGalt (user info) at 2007-08-29 19:08:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, pick your spot in the draft. Either post on the website, message me AIM: UberJohnGalt, Gmail: UberJohnGalt.at.gmail.com or email to the same.
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2007-08-10 07:23:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
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Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-08-09 22:25:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You should have included the "Bart-slap" 404 picture.
Filename
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-07-16 14:45:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Crap - I actually surfed around for some reference to draws ya too - but came up empty.
I then got drunk and forgot all about it.
So, I guess it will have to be the same thing I got you last year.
Happy belated b-day fella.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-07-16 14:17:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I tried to wish you a Happy BD Bob, and I left it for BobLobla instead.
Obviously I haven't fully recovered from birthday festivities.
Hope it was a good one!
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-05-23 19:01:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
For the record, that picture of the hairy dude frightens me.
...and yes, I'm back already. I'm weak.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-05-23 13:47:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
notice that one hairy testicle you can see between the legs.
if my brain had to catch that i believe anyone else who sees this post should have to focus on it now too.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-05-23 13:18:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Who's penis would you be borrowing for the conception, Orgasmo?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-05-23 13:04:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WELL DUH
http://www.ubersite.com/m/89830
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-23 13:02:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-05-21 00:26:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmm...well, hairy back photo excepted, o-man, I think you and I could make pretty babies.
---
I think you'd be right.
Good to know that someone's been paying attention to the hotness.
Submitted by Abbey (user info) at 2007-05-23 12:49:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I can't believe I actually came back to this post TWICE to see that...that thing.
Somebody give me his address and I'll personally pay for full body hair removal.
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2007-05-21 20:21:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Truly disturbing that you actually found that picture.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-05-21 00:26:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmm...well, hairy back photo excepted, o-man, I think you and I could make pretty babies.
good hate bob, but you could have gone a bit further.
Hairy pic pulled it up to a +2
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2007-05-20 18:38:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-05-20 18:26:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahha +2 for the hairy manbeast.
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2007-05-19 19:55:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-05-19 15:22:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-19 15:20:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-05-19 10:31:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-05-19 00:45:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FYI: the whole hatemadness thing is professional. Beers are on me 'till you puke if you ever come to eastern PA.
---
Love you too, meatgazer.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-05-19 10:31:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-05-19 00:45:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FYI: the whole hatemadness thing is professional. Beers are on me 'till you puke if you ever come to eastern PA.
===
This was a kind offer. But he hates PA for some stupid reason. You'd think the whole state stole his lunch money and ran off with his girl or something.
Submitted by darkwulffe (user info) at 2007-05-19 02:38:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is mos def the best hate thus far
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-05-19 02:31:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-05-19 01:12:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-05-19 00:31:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BB's is slightly better, but "Suck me, Napoleon" was a nice touch.
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When Uber's resident drunk/hippy agrees with it's resident drunk/warmongerer only one thing can emegre: MORTAL KOMBAT FATALITY
Im drunk
but you never bothered to purvey THAT stereotype.....
--------
Ha ha
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2007-05-19 01:23:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm going to have nightmares for weeks because of that pic.
1st pic = hey now
followed by *puke*puke*barf*look again* *puke*puke*barf*look again* *puke*puke*barf*look again* *puke*puke*barf*look again* *puke*puke*barf*look again* *puke*puke*barf*look again* *puke*puke*barf*look again* *puke*puke*barf*look again* *puke*puke*barf*look again* *puke*puke*barf*look again*
then I passed out from dehydration
dick
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-05-18 23:09:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Holy fuck
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2007-05-18 23:07:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
RUAAAAAAAAAH FUCKING HOSTILE!
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2007-05-18 22:02:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BOB's always good for some hatin'.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2007-05-18 22:00:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Abbey (user info) at 2007-05-18 16:26:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-05-18 13:55:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh my sweet jesus....
That hairy back photo will haunt me from this day forth.
****
My God, Abbey, pay a little good attention. That is THE REAL THING, a picture
I took while,.... er... umm... sorry, O-man. I'll shut up now.
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-05-18 20:01:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-18 16:19:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If you must hate me, hate me properly:
Most the art I use is by Caravaggio. He was Baroque, not Renaissance.
Let's give a big round of applause to the PA Board of Education!
---
He's right, you know.
Submitted by vhfan (user info) at 2007-05-18 18:24:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-05-18 17:14:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
look, it's a picture of O-tron and Gnarls Barkley!
Submitted by Abbey (user info) at 2007-05-18 16:26:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-05-18 13:55:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh my sweet jesus....
That hairy back photo will haunt me from this day forth.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-18 16:19:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If you must hate me, hate me properly:
Most the art I use is by Caravaggio. He was Baroque, not Renaissance.
Let's give a big round of applause to the PA Board of Education!
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:54:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Pretty much
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:50:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by lechuza (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:43:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you can almost feel the hate
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:33:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Or worse yet, that you unleashed that shit-sucking poetry contest onto us?"
That was all you needed.
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:22:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:21:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Sinistral (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:08:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 alone for the tombstone.
I wish someone would hate on me :(
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:08:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:06:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No. Shlongy Jr. is infinitely better than a Bret Jr.
No contest.
===
Agreed
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:07:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OMG, you invented a string of words and I stole them!?! WTF?
If we can lay claim to shit like that I officially lay claim to 'virgin, homo, zitboy'
Now don't go getting all bent out of shape, e.e. cummings, just because this mongoloid was able to muster up some better hate than you. Subhumans are always able to focus these baser emotions better than the higher species.
Am I right, Homo erectus?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:06:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No. Shlongy Jr. is infinitely better than a Bret Jr.
No contest.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:04:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
tards.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:04:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Okay, okay...now I'm REALLY leaving for the day. Wouldn't want to get roped into this HateMadness crap or anything like that. ^_^
See you later, Orgastricfawn and Pap Smourge.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-18 15:01:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
PPS - come up with your own shit, menses licker.
Leave my double platinum album out of this. It's bad enough Bore_Bob stole my tombsone up there.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:59:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ps, lick me where i pee, Toad
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:58:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I fucking love HateMadness.
I love it so much I used my own alter to spam my account with deuces just so I could do a post.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:55:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FEEL ALL THE HATE!
It's so intense that the replies are getting hostile!
RAAAAAAAAAA!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:54:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
scourge doesn't know how to "take it" like a man.
[dramatic pause]
He just knows how to take it from one.
PREDICTABLE BLISS!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:53:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:50:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:42:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is DEFINITELY the best one yet.
And you forgot something on the list of "What will Orgasmoron write next?"...
..."an Uber-centric song parody for his butt-buddy CaptainThorns will record within a month"
---
Impossible. You're retired. Apparently.
---
No shit.
You're turning into Bret Jr.
=============
Oh now THEM'S fighting words. C'mon up I-74 a stretch and take it like a man, scourge. ^_^
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:50:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:42:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is DEFINITELY the best one yet.
And you forgot something on the list of "What will Orgasmoron write next?"...
..."an Uber-centric song parody for his butt-buddy CaptainThorns will record within a month"
---
Impossible. You're retired. Apparently.
---
No shit.
You're turning into Bret Jr.
Which is probably better than the Shlongy Jr. I'm turning into.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:49:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:42:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is DEFINITELY the best one yet.
And you forgot something on the list of "What will Orgasmoron write next?"...
..."an Uber-centric song parody for his butt-buddy CaptainThorns will record within a month"
---
Impossible. You're retired. Apparently.
===========
Oh, I am. Fully retired from posting. I just had to include that for old time's sake, you know.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:42:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is DEFINITELY the best one yet.
And you forgot something on the list of "What will Orgasmoron write next?"...
..."an Uber-centric song parody for his butt-buddy CaptainThorns will record within a month"
---
Impossible. You're retired. Apparently.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:44:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:42:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is DEFINITELY the best one yet.
And you forgot something on the list of "What will Orgasmoron write next?"...
..."an Uber-centric song parody for his butt-buddy CaptainThorns will record within a month"
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:41:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Fresh Fucking Prince of Uber-Bel-Air"
+2 for that alone
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:40:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:31:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You can't miss with that tombstone.
I believe that it was first said by Shlongy, way back around the year 2006.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:28:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hmmm... hair's lookin a little thin up top in that one. i just noticed.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:15:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well fancy that. Way to rip off my format, Mr. Original.
Or should I say MR_ORIGNIAL?
STOP LOOKING AT ME, SWAN!
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:15:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Cinnamon and gravy!
Submitted by EmoJean (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:14:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
GOONIE GOO GOO
Submitted by ubetidid (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:07:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
best hate post
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:06:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What will Orgamsmatron post next? Will it be:
-A renaissance picture, with poetry pasted onto it?
-A bunch of name-dropping tombstones?
-More crappy poetry?
-A lameass contest?
-Somebody else's bandwagon?
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2007-05-18 14:04:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i still think Hilarity's post was so far the end-all best, but this was pretty damn good.
Submitted by justagirl27 (user info) at 2007-05-18 13:58:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-05-18 13:55:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh my sweet jesus....
That hairy back photo will haunt me from this day forth.
THANKS A LOT, BOB! asshole.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2007-05-18 13:55:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I knew that guy was a paki
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-05-18 13:54:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He told me those rodents were his PETS!
I do enjoy the front view, though.
Submitted by ampersand (user info) at 2007-05-18 13:52:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ass rabies isnt contagious is it?
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2007-05-18 13:52:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What will Orgamsmatron post next? Will it be:
-A renaissance picture, with poetry pasted onto it?
-A bunch of name-dropping tombstones?
-More crappy poetry?
-A lameass contest?
-Somebody else's bandwagon?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-05-18 13:51:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i agree wholeheartedly.