Aspartame Onions Keep Rice Fresh (368 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.62 on 9 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Luga Lug <lug_alug.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2007-06-04 18:40:15 EDT
What the hell is that and how did it invade my subconscious?
My dreams led me to a sack of rice with an onion inside, made up mostly of aspartame (the shitty sweetener in most diet soda). I took a bite out of the onion without reading the warning label. The label read like those little gel packs that keep things fresh (the do not eat ones). The taste was familiar to a dishwashing liquid/water mixture, if you've ever taken a nice swig of that. I scream in panic and... that's it.
Afterwards, time passes I suppose. I can't remember anything except muttering "Gawd Dayum" after I woke up, taking a piss, and getting some water. Back to bed I go, it is only midnight. Then, it begins.
So begins the lucid dream, or being partially conscious and aware of dreaming while dreaming. I cannot clearly explain the sensation involved in falling asleep this way, other than actually being somewhat aware of my brain numbing. I can wake up in the dream state, put the dream on "pause", look at my clock, take note of the time, and within five seconds I am back to the dream as if I had pressed the play button. The mind numbing sensation is fucking nuts, as well as the shift to dream world where my mind starts pressuring me to accept the subconscious trip as reality. Time passes normally in a lucid dream, so when I feel like I've slept for hours, I have actually slept for mere minutes.
I lucid dream from time to time, without warning. When in the dream I have 10% of my consciousness to do or "dream" whatever I want, and I usually always go for the same thing. Groping without care, I run through my subconscious until I can find it.
The only thing I cannot bring out is "God". Never once have I had a dream of "God" or anything of resemblence to the supposed one. In lucid dreams, well... how should I say this. Lust over virtue? Wins every time.
Anyone else lucid dream, and if so, what is the first thing you do when you realize you are somewhat awake within your dream?
Also, more in tune with reality, may I advise you to never give kids under two years old a bubble bath. If they shit in the tub you probably won't be able to see it, and when you turn around to get the towel they will be drawing on the walls with a turd pencil. My kid didn't think to eat it, so I was actually lucky in that situation.
That was the highlight of my day, but I ask again, aspartame onions in a bag of rice? What the fuck?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucid_dreaming
User Reviews
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2007-06-06 04:01:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Lucid dreaming kinda freaks me out.
I know it's a dream, and I really want to punch my boss, or fly off the top of the building or fuck my best friends wife, but there always seems to be a shade of doubt about whether it really is a dream which stops me from doing it.
Then I wake, angry and frustrated with myself for wasting such a good opportunity.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-06-05 13:37:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2007-06-05 13:24:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
One technique to control lucid dreaming is to write something on your hand (the back of your hand) in large black marker. It can be simple as a big "X". You have to keep it there for a LONG time. You have to see it constantly. You have to get in the habit of asking yourself "Am I dreaming NOW?" and then looking at your hand. If you see the "X", you are not dreaming. If you do it enough, you will eventually do it in your dream - and not see the "X" - and you will realize you are dreaming. And it keeps getting easier.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2007-06-05 10:39:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I have those dreams sometimes, but I wake up with a rock hard cock and a messy hand.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-06-04 21:23:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I lucid dream alot.
Usually when I'm stressed or overtired. I do alot of situational theorizing, and come up with answers to most of my big issues like that.
Now that I write it, it's kind of sad.
Submitted by Fatterrific (user info) at 2007-06-04 20:19:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
The last time I realized I was dreaming, I walked around, alternately stabbing people and grabbing titties. It was a damn good dream.
Submitted by Lugalug (user info) at 2007-06-04 18:50:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I try, but going lucid is totally involuntary for me. Crazy ass stuff though.
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-06-04 18:44:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We did a study on Lucid dreaming in college (which was weird cause I was an art major) but we learned techniques to enhance it. Now I can fly in my dreams whenever I want. There's nothing like waking up after a flying dream. you feel good.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2007-06-04 18:41:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I want to set your pets on fire.