Eternal fleas and time traveling chickens (821 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.73 on 41 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Forensic (they made me this way) Girl (View user info) at 2007-06-20 22:34:45 EDT
Before we start, just know that there is a high probability that I have no idea what I'm talking about.
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"Great fleas have little fleas upon their backs to bite 'em,
And little fleas have lesser fleas, and so ad infinitum.
And the great fleas themselves, in turn, have greater fleas to go on,
While these again have greater still, and greater still, and so on."
~Augustus De Morgan parodying Jonathan Swift~
The concept of eternity is a difficult one to wrap our minds around. Think about it. Something without beginning or end.
Being corporal beings, hence finite, can we truly understand what eternity is?
If eternity means not having a beginning or end, does that mean that if something is eternal, it is both unchanging and 'in the moment?'
Let's say that Joe is eternal. He had no beginning and will have no end. Using the literary device of suspension of disbelief, let's say that Joe has a blank canvas and some paint. If Joe is eternal then the canvas cannot be painted, because to do so means that the canvas existed first as a blank canvas and then was changed. Since eternity essentially means "is" rather than "was" or "will be," change, which requires a linear move in time, cannot happen. In eternity, the canvas either is blank or is painted, but it cannot move from one state to another.
Damn. Sounds kind of boring and hellish if you ask me. Upon reflecting on eternity, if someone were to ask me if I would like to be eternal, I'd definitely decline. But then again, I couldn't be eternal since I most certainly had a beginning. What the individual would be offering me is immortality, a completely different can of worms.
Will get to the concept of immortality at a later date.
*whew*
So, which did come first, the chicken or the egg?
Har har, trick question.
See, once there was this wee little single cell organism happily swimming around in the primordial soup. This little wee cell began to divide and eventually grew (or formed) into simple organisms which of course eventually became more complex organisms and so on and so forth until you get to very complex beasties moving about on the Earth. At some point, the reptile beastie branch split and those reptile-like beasties grew feathers. These feathered beasties would eventually become what we know today as avian creatures. And, like their scaly and featherless reptile cousins, they laid eggs.
So, really you can't pinpoint who came first since instead of an egg, both the chicken and the egg evolved from a single cell.
That is if you're an evolutionist. If you're a creationist, then I just don't know what to say besides the chicken came first (because God created it). All I know is if I was that very first chicken ever, I'd be very surprised when that egg shot out of my ass.
(Oh fuck off. I know that was oversimplified)
And speaking of 'time,' who says we even have that concept correct?
Are we definite of the linear nature of this so called time? What if time didn't move forward? Or backward for that matter?
Linear time makes time travel very improbable if not impossible. Mainly because of the pesky paradoxes. Like the old one of if you traveled back in time and killed your parents, that means you were never born, but if you were never born then how did you go back in time in the first place? Or, you go forward in time and witness some event. Then you return to our time and use that knowledge to your favor. But! The very act of doing so, you will therefore change the sequence of events that need to happen in order to lead to the future event you witnessed. The outcome may be very different and quite possibly disastrous.
Then there is that whole speed of light issue too. Nothing except light can travel as fast as light (186,000 miles per sec) which is needed for time travel. Oh sure, you can get pretty close in theory but you could never achieve lightspeed. Wouldn't that be frustrating?
"Sonofabitch! I paid good money for this here spaceship and I just can't seem to go faster than 185,998.999 miles per second. Serves me right for buying one of them imported crotch rockets. What the hell is the number for customer service?"
Nope. Best to not fuck with time travel. Besides, the gravity will squish you.
Where was I? Oh yes, linear time. Bothersome concept. Personally, I blame Bush.
One of my cousins had a speech impediment and couldn't say "Earth." When he tried to say it, it came out "Urf."
I almost went into physics or astronomy.
Aren't you glad I didn't?
They said I had the potential. Potential for what, I don't know and never did ask. Probably being a huge pain in the ass to the professors.
Ok, I'm done for the time being.
Sorry, I found one of my old Metaphysics Philosophy textbooks the other day.
It was a required course.
I found it perversly enjoyable.
User Reviews
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-09-26 11:50:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
apparently I am following thorns around on old posts.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-26 11:35:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Another day at work and I am bored...so YOU shall be my victim today... :)
This messed with my brain. At least the whole canvas/paint bit.
Submitted by gonefiguring (user info) at 2007-07-11 00:14:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 Pink Floyd. I remember some odd thngs.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-07-10 23:55:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You never write me anymore so obviously, you never show me your gangbuster anymore.
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2007-06-29 16:12:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fascinating. Show us your hole.
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-06-29 14:28:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Surely eggs don't come out of asses? There is another, separate, orifice for eggs.. yes? No?
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-06-29 14:15:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nevermind,
MI does not equal Missouri as i initially thought..
:(
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-06-29 14:04:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hey dudette
where was it you said you were from again? MI? Anywhere near Marquette?
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2007-06-22 04:33:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-06-21 18:59:26 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I always figure they call it an 'egg' because that's the sound the chicken makes when the damn thing comes out
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The post itself and this review made me confused and happy all at once.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-06-21 16:08:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What the Jethro Tull is this shit?
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-06-21 14:38:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
How do we know linear time exists anyways? For all we know, if I went back in time and killed and ate all the annoying proto-humans I keep seeing on the Discovery Channel, I'd simply generate an entirely new timeline which would run in parallel to our own which, having already happened, has to exist (maybe). Therefor, I could live in MY world, in whch none of you annoying people exist, and you people could still have your iPod nanos and computer porn.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-06-21 14:27:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-06-21 13:59:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I always figure they call it an 'egg' because that's the sound the chicken makes when the damn thing comes out.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-06-21 12:51:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-06-21 10:18:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. - Groucho Marx
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-06-21 10:02:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great Scott, Marty!
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2007-06-21 09:32:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Watch the fountain. Had some interesting stuff on eternity.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2007-06-21 09:31:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That is if you're an evolutionist. If you're a creationist, then I just don't know what to say besides the chicken came first (because God created it). All I know is if I was that very first chicken ever, I'd be very surprised when that egg shot out of my ass.
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You could also say that god created an egg and the first chicken cam from that.
I prefer the old greek version of titans raping and cracking each others heads open, and animals being the products of bodily fluids that sprayed about.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2007-06-21 09:29:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Let's say that Joe is eternal. He had no beginning and will have no end. Using the literary device of suspension of disbelief, let's say that Joe has a blank canvas and some paint. If Joe is eternal then the canvas cannot be painted, because to do so means that the canvas existed first as a blank canvas and then was changed. Since eternity essentially means "is" rather than "was" or "will be," change, which requires a linear move in time, cannot happen. In eternity, the canvas either is blank or is painted, but it cannot move from one state to another.
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No.
If the blank canvas is eternal it can't be painted.
Eternal, in my mind, doesn't implay static.
Joe and the canvas could be eternal, he could grow and shring, it could be painted and wiped clean.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2007-06-21 08:51:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
[cuddles]
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-06-21 08:47:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When are you going to send me some updated nudes?
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2007-06-21 08:16:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
drugs are bad mkay
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2007-06-21 07:02:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks for this random act of edutainment.
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2007-06-21 05:18:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-06-21 04:42:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
STOP LOOKING AT MY PHOTO BUCKO.
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but yer soooo hot. especially in those pants.
they're so.........
full!
bucko? last i heard that spression ron howard sed that to henry winkler aka da fonz.
that was 1978.
Submitted by laika (user info) at 2007-06-21 04:53:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"Being corporal beings, hence finite, can we truly understand what eternity is?"
I would say no, at least on an intuitive level of understanding. I think the best we can do is have some sort of mathematical understanding of infinity.
I dont think something has to be unchanging to be eternal. However, if you substituted "perfection" for "eternal" in your Joe example it might make more sense.
Speaking of time travel, you can time travel forward if you could get close to the speed of light. Time gets slower and slower, and eventually stops at the speed of light. Or you could fall into a black hole if you wanted to time travel, but I dont know how you would get out again.
My best guess is that backwards time travel is impossible though; at least in the same universe anyways.
Also, to Berty- it sounds ridiculous but it's true. Mass increases as an object accelerates, and you would never be able to provide enough energy to get an object with mass all the way to the speed of light. I cant fully explain it, but here's a link that does, or you can at least know what terms to search for if you really care to look into it further-
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass-energy_equivalence
You might have read them, but for those who havent 2 good books on this are-
The Universe in a Nutshell- Hawking
Black Holes and Time Warps...- Kip Thorne
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-06-21 04:42:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
STOP LOOKING AT MY PHOTO BUCKO.
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2007-06-21 03:58:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-06-21 03:33:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
soemones getting a bit excited
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i am crushed, just so you know.
i pathetically fell in love with a picture from this site.
no, not this fine lady, nuther one
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-06-21 03:33:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
soemones getting a bit excited
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2007-06-21 03:18:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
smart
pretty
and deep
i am impressed
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2007-06-21 02:29:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Let's say that Joe is eternal. He had no beginning and will have no end. Using the literary device of suspension of disbelief, let's say that Joe has a blank canvas and some paint. If Joe is eternal then the canvas cannot be painted, because to do so means that the canvas existed first as a blank canvas and then was changed. Since eternity essentially means "is" rather than "was" or "will be," change, which requires a linear move in time, cannot happen. In eternity, the canvas either is blank or is painted, but it cannot move from one state to another.
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I'm not sure I follow, I never did get me a fancy education or nothing. Is it not possible for Joe to exist eternally but for the canvas to be linear?
Also can I get a little help with the speed of light thing? I mean people say "you can't go faster than the speed of light, you knuclehead!" to me all the time and when I ask them why they spew some ridiculous thing about how it would take all the energy in the universe to accelerate something with mass to that speed.
It just seems a little odd, there's loads of light in the universe and whilst I accept that light doesn't have much in the mass department, to say that it's impossible to go faster than that seems a little arbitrary.
At least that's how it seems to me because I am ignorant. Little help?
Submitted by FUFtheKlown (user info) at 2007-06-21 01:25:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Holy Shit... I actually understood some of that
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-06-21 01:22:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Believe In Chaos.
I do...
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-06-20 23:48:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what can i say im a dork for science
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-06-20 23:45:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just realized that was completely unrelated. Oh well.
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-06-20 23:44:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I recently learned that one of my passions in life may be studying the results of brain damage. As in, right parietal lobe gets fucked up, there goes your ability to understand music. It's endlessly fascinating looking at the freakish results.
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2007-06-20 23:26:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BTW, going into astronomy is totally worthwhile. Get paid little for doing even less, while somehow earning the confused respect of every random person you meet who wants to know what it means if they're a Sagittarius. Oh, and the letters "NSFW" have no meaning for you and you get to learn all kinds of cool national security stuff.
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2007-06-20 23:22:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gotta be careful here: Ludwig Boltzmann killed himself because he couldn't adequately formulate a mathematical description for the subjective experience of time.
One of the all time favorite things I ever learned was that the ancient Egyptians had two words for eternity, one linear and one cyclical. 5000 years of progress and we haven't got much farther (except for the important distinction that we add hops to our beer).
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-06-20 23:01:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The branch of science itself just seems like such a mind-boggling waste of human ingenuity to me. But it's great to talk about drunk.
Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-06-20 22:46:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm a big fan of string theory, myself.
Cool gif.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-06-20 22:39:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ah sorry! Yank time here.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-06-20 22:37:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jeasus FG, My cat just brought in a dead bird and I am now awake. It.s 3am (and as its The Blokes birthday - we're off to a theme park today) and I AM TOO TIRED FOR THIS.
:-P
I'm an evolutionist (and a science student).