The Tinfoil Fortress (2 of 2) (469 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: Compound_Tales
Rating: 1.75 on 19 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Jack McCallum (View user info) at 2007-06-25 18:33:13 EDT
The Tinfoil Fortress (Part 2 of 2)
(A Compound Tale)
Part 1 http://www.ubersite.com/m/108386
The basement door shuddered and fell to the floor, still in the metal frame.
MAC and MIA took a step toward Gonus, their heads swiveling as they searched the room for threats. Both wore expressions of pleasant expectation. They could have been a young couple waiting to be seated in a fancy restaurant.
Gonus took just a moment to confirm that the androids weren't carrying any large tools or explosives. Androids rarely carried guns or any other weapons demanding pinpoint accuracy. They were very good at throwing automobiles and ripping off heads and arms but they did poorly on the firing range, more a flaw of the cameras in the artificial eyes than a failure of any mechanical engineering in the limbs. All of the Compound's androids were myopic to a degree. The Mobile Technology Research specialists were always waiting for groups like Optics & Imaging to play catch up. Before his manufactured assassins could take another step Gonus reached under his desk and flipped a crude knife switch.
MAC and MIA braced themselves as the floor erupted around them. The ruptures in the poured concrete floor followed straight lines, forming a box. Serrated metal spikes burst from four corners of the floor within a few feet of the androids. The spikes rose up bearing glimmering mesh between them and slammed into the ceiling.
Gonus stood up and backed toward the far wall of his workshop.
The androids were contained within a cage of slender metal links. The links were made of ufonium, a metallic element synthesized by the Compound and retained exclusively for their use, one of many technological breakthroughs achieved after decades of back-engineering components found within one of the extraterrestrial craft that crashed outside of Roswell, New Mexico, in 1947. The corner spikes were made of the same metal, locked into anchors deep in the concrete ceiling and floor.
MIA reached out and grabbed a fistful of small, seemingly delicate links. The links of the cage were somewhat slack, and the cage's lack of rigidity made shaking the mounting spikes free of their mounts an impossible task. MIA shook the cage and tried to tear the links. She went to one corner of the cage and reached for the mounting spike, but it was buried in concrete, out of reach.
MIA lowered her arms and stepped to the rear of the cage.
--
Dicks frowned. "What the hell is that cage made of?"
"I would venture to guess it is the same stuff which forms all of the blast doors in the Compound," Lorber said, being purposely vague. Now was not the time to educate one of the Compound's blue-collar task-masters on the technical specifications of ufonium.
Dicks whistled. He remembered when a young file closer named Clutterfunt freaked out after seeing brain-damaged Johnny,* the Compound's most infamous 'guest,' walking down a corridor with his ass hanging out of his hospital gown and a divot missing from the side of his head. Young Clutterfunt had run to the vehicle bay and tried to ram the doors open in an abrupt resignation attempt. It was later estimated that Clutterfunt's Crown Vic had been going about 60mph when it hit those doors. The car folded in on itself like an accordion, the engine block traveling backward, severing Clutterfunt's head and limbs and depositing his torso in the back seat. Afterward, the dull gray metal of the vehicle bay doors wasn't even scratched.
"Looks like you robots are fucked," Dicks said.
Lorber raised a hand and made a shooing motion over one shoulder, and then gave his full attention to the console transmitting commands to the androids.
--
Gonus went back to his desk. He was nervous. He took a sip from a can of Coke on his desk and then moved closer to the cage, studying the faces of the automatons. MIA is more lifelike than ever, he thought. The clarity of those green eyes is astounding.
MAC started unzipping his fly.
Gonus took a step back.
MAC reached into his trousers and withdrew seven inches of flaccid synthetic penis with the approximate diameter of the soda can on the desk behind Gonus.
"That's just excessive," Gonus said, eyeing the artificial organ with disdain. He frowned and took another step back.
MAC began to urinate.
The ufonium mesh began to sizzle like bacon on a grill.
--
Dicks stared at the screen wide-eyed with wonder. "Is that fucking robot pissing acid?"
Lorber nodded.
"Look at that chickenshit," Dicks laughed, as he watched Gonus back against the far wall of the room.
--
MAC aimed his plastic penis in a high arc, the volatile acid burning a door-sized hole into the mesh of the cage. When he was done he shook off and tucked his fake phallus into his pants, but not before a single stray drop struck his left shoe, burning through the glossy leather.
MAC and MIA stepped through the hole in the cage.
Gonus turned and stuck one questing finger into what looked like a gouge in the concrete wall. A thick panel rose up out of sight and then dropped back into place with a resounding thud the moment Gonus was on the other side.
MAC and MIA stared at the wall.
--
"This is getting tiresome," Lorber said.
"Man, that looks like a pretty damn thick wall," Dicks said. "How are you..."
Dicks felt his mouth hanging open as he saw the wall through MAC's eyes on one monitor, and MAC through the eyes of MIA on the other. MAC dropped his trousers and underwear.
"What the..."
When he saw the size of MAC's cock and balls, Dicks cleared his throat and whispered, "What kinda faggot shit—"
--
MAC tore open his scrotum with a spill of lubricating fluids and plucked one of his pseudo-testicles free of a thin coil of metal. The testicle was dark, had a metallic sheen, and a small red LED was flashing on one side.
MAC and MIA took a few steps backward and then MAC raised one of what the Motechs had dubbed grenadicles, and threw it at the wall.
The testicle grenade blew a four by four hole in the thick concrete and steel wall. A piece of steel that looked like a checkmark imbedded itself in MAC's forehead.
--
When the feed from MAC's eyes went dark Lorber slammed a fist on the console and shouted, "Fucking scheisse!"
Through MIA he gave MAC a quick examination. The unit was salvageable, but the optics were ruined. MIA would have to proceed alone.
--
MIA bent low and stepped into the ragged hole in the wall. On the other side was a bare and narrow corridor. The walls of the corridor were poured concrete. She walked down the corridor and came to a set of concrete stairs leading down to an empty room fifty feet square. The room was illuminated by a half dozen incandescent bulbs hanging from cords high above.
The walls of the room seemed to shimmer and reflect the light.
Gonus stood alone in the middle of the room. At his feet was his emergency pack, a ratty backpack filled with cash, clothes, and half a dozen fake passports and driver's licenses. He had only recently discovered this room. Whoever had built it back in the fifties had taken the Cold War Soviet threat seriously. Gonus had only spent a few hours down here, stringing lights and lining the walls. He had no gun and no way out other than the stairs blocked by the female android.
--
In the van, Lorber chuckled. He flipped a switch and spoke into a microphone. "It seems you are—"
--
"—trapped in here," MIA said.
Marvelous, Gonus though. What lovely voice design. He watched MIA come down the stairs. Her breasts had a delicate bounce. The stiff silicone of earlier models seemed to be a thing of the past.
MIA reached the dusty concrete floor, took a step, and paused.
--
Dicks watched Lorber fussing with dials and switches, twisting the joystick this way and that.
"What's up?"
"We appear to have some minimal signal degradation," Lorber said.
--
MIA took another few steps. Then she jerked to a stop. She laughed, and then let out a sound like a bark.
Gonus looked up at the walls and ceiling shimmering in the inadequate light.
--
"Hey, look," Dicks said. "This guy is a classic nut job. He lined the walls with fucking tinfoil. That's hilarious!" He let out a laugh and said, "All he needs is a shiny little hat!"
Lorber muttered to himself as his fingers moved over the console.
Dicks caught the word cunting and wondered why the tinfoil was such a big deal.
--
MIA's fingers twitched. She smiled, burst into tears, and then seemed to be fellating an invisible tumescence. She took another few steps closer to the center of the room and then fell on her shapely synthetic ass.
Gonus looked at the shimmering metal surrounding him. He'd applied it as a quick security measure before he could really lock down the room against electronic eavesdropping. The walls and ceiling were covered with alternating layers of tinfoil and lead. Not aluminum foil, but tin foil. A conduit and a series of resistors connected to his residential power supply provided a very small electrical current in the layers of tin, the strength of which varied from moment to moment.
It was a dime-store Faraday Cage, and it seemed that his precautions were enough to disrupt the radio signals directing MIA.
--
Lorber was wrestling with the controls and shrieking in German, spittle flying from his lips and spattering the console.
"Calm down there, bub," Dicks said. "I'll go in there and pop Gonus all by myself."
--
MIA abruptly got to her feet and began shedding her clothes. She was spectacular. Her skin was pale and lightly freckled, a perfect match for her red hair. In the half light it looked as if her pubic hair was on fire, and Gonus might have been within the range of arousal had she not been jerking like a spastic.
Her nipples were hard. Gonus had no idea how that effect was achieved.
Gonus began edging around the android when she got down on her hands and knees. One hand lifted from the floor, grazed her belly and then moved up between her thighs.
"Oh my goodness," Gonus said.
--
"What the hell is she doing?" All Dicks could see on the monitor showing MIA's point of view was the concrete floor.
Lorber made a gagging noise and shook a jutting finger at a smaller screen where the ghostly green outline of a female form appeared to be on all fours.
"That's her?" Dicks asked. "Like some kind of radar or some—"
Lorber made a choking sound. His face was almost purple. A series on lights came on in one corner of the console and Lorber's face became deathly pale.
"Hey..." Dicks squinted, and then looked astounded. "Hey, she's frigging herself!"
--
Gonus reached the stairs and looked back. The only time he had ever seen such as sight as that which was before him was when he had ventured into an adult cinema to watch an imported Swedish film that might have been enjoyable if it were not for the stench in the theater and the unsettling rustlings around him.
Twitching fingers parted soft folds in the most lovely shades of pink, and Gonus felt a twitch that was all his own. He felt ashamed and jerked his head away from the sight so quickly he pulled a muscle in his neck.
He heard a soft but distinct click, and looked back.
--
"Hey, what's that?" Dicks asked. On the small screen showing the green outline of MIA on hands and knees were flashing letters. "L... Y... N... W..." The letters were followed by a + sign.
Lorber slumped in his chair. "Low Yield Nuclear Weapon," he whispered. "Now armed."
Dicks scratched his head. "There's a nuke? Where?"
Lorber pointed at the screen and shouted, "In her facking womb! She is out of contact and as is protocol in such situations she is in self-destruct mode and I can't stop her!"
--
From within MIA came a muted beeping.
Gonus wasn't taking any chances. He took the stairs two at a time and seconds later he burst through the back door of the house, racing across the lawn.
--
Lorber started cursing in German again. On one corner of the console, a countdown was displayed in bright red LEDs.
Dicks turned around and leaped into the passenger seat of the van.
--
In the sub-basement, MIA sighed, and then she was vaporized.
--
Dicks saw the house and the ground it was on rise up about ten feet. He reached for the ignition key, too late. The street rolled in a big wave. The van went up as the asphalt under the vehicle rolled.
Dicks had a flash of a summer at the beach during his college days, being sent airborne in a blanket toss.
The van began to turn over in midair. In the rear view mirror Dicks saw the house bulge as white light seeped through every door and window and ruptured joint, and then the house was a storm of fragments and splinters which struck the van like shrapnel.
The van came down hard on one side and Dicks felt his head bounce against the driver's side window and shatter it and then rap against the hard asphalt of the street before everything went dark.
When Dicks opened his eyes he was still on his side. He smelled dust and charred wood. The van was lying in a fallout zone, the fallout consisting of shattered wood and kitchen utensils and socks and magazines. He looked behind him and saw Lorber lying motionless in the back of the van.
A stainless steel vacuum extension tube entered the scientist's gaping mouth and exited the back of his head.
"Scheisse is right," Dicks said.
The windshield had been blown out and aside from a few new cracks and potholes the street ahead was unchanged, sun-dappled. Dicks grabbed the radio handset and called the Compound for assistance. He had to struggle with every word, his tongue as thick and slow as if it had been shot full of Novocain.
He released the handset, listing to faint chatter. The Compound had already spotted the explosion via satellite and were dispatching a clean up crew.
Somewhere a little kid shouted, "Holy cow, look at that!"
The radio crackled and sputtered. Dicks heard something about a cover-up story involving a gas main explosion. Then he heard footsteps, shoes crunching over rubble.
Gonus hunkered down in front of the van and looked in at Dicks.
"Let this be a lesson," Gonus said. "Stop following me."
Dicks watched the man slip a small pack onto his shoulder and walk down the street, turning out of sight at the corner. A moment later he heard helicopters overhead. He closed his eyes.
*For more on Johnny see Made in the U.S.A.
Hope there aren't any typos. Things are getting busy at work and I wanted to crank this out asap.
User Reviews
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2007-06-27 16:26:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-06-26 12:09:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
See this... > ---- <
This is me hating you...
------
snort
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2007-06-27 08:17:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
masturbating android which blows up.
that's original.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-06-26 15:58:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nice.
Submitted by nrduncan (user info) at 2007-06-26 15:13:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-06-26 14:55:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
didn't read it.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-06-26 14:47:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-06-26 12:28:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
on the edge of too cute old bean, but a most enjoyable read.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-06-26 12:09:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
See this... > ---- <
This is me hating you...
Submitted by lover101 (user info) at 2007-06-26 11:39:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2007-06-26 11:22:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Loved it.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-06-26 11:21:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Grenadicle....
Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-06-26 01:11:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I almost skipped this because I thought it was one of those goddamn political posts.
You walked a tight cutesy line, but I enjoyed it.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-06-25 21:42:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-06-25 20:39:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2007-06-25 20:25:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"the house was a storm of fragments and splinters which struck the van like shrapnel"
Wouldn't they be striking the house as shrapnel? Whatever.
Good read.
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2007-06-25 18:55:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That's weird. It's like something out of that twilighty show about
that zone.
-- Homer Simpson
Treehouse of Horror VI
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-06-25 18:44:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HAHAHAHA!
How appropriate - found at the bottom of the page when I posted this...
--
The doll's trying to kill me, and the toaster's been laughing at me.
-- Homer Simpson
Treehouse of Horror III
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-06-25 18:43:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
retaleeat.....reetaliator....re....
REVENGE PLUS 2
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-06-25 18:42:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
is it just me, or do most stories on this damn site happen in a basement.
I mean, its not that I dont enjoy them, im just pointing that out...