Things that fucking irk me (LPF) (777 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.03 on 34 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Bob ,|,, °_° ,,|, Lobla (View user info) at 2007-06-29 12:01:30 EDT
1) Ticketmaster.
I just bought my tickets to Deftones yesterday and they were $35 bucks. I figure, thats not too shabby, it is on the expensive end for shows at the University but The Deftones fucking rip. I move on to the next phase of the purchase and discover that there is a $9 'convenience' fee and a $1 pickup charge.
WTF? convenience??? Like you conveniently jam your dick up my ass with no lube? You are right, that is very convenient. Fucking monopoly. The thing that sucks the most ass about this is there is nothing you can do about it. There is no other way to get these tickets, other than ebay, but then you are buying them from someone who has already taken the giant black cock in the ass that is ticketmaster.
2) Veterans License Plates
Yes, thanks for fighting for my county 50 years ago. I really do appreciate it, but now you need to get your fucking caddy out of the fast lane because you are going 30kph under the fucking limit and I am about to have a fucking conniption. HOW DO YOU NOT NOTICE EVERY CAR PASSING YOU ON THE RIGHT HAND SIDE. I KNOW THAT YOU NEED TO MAKE A LEFT TURN IN 15KMS BUT FUCK, GET OUT OF THE WAY.
3) Cell Phone Companies
FUCK YOU, that is all.
4) Email Spammers
Is there anyone left on the fucking planet that opens an email entitled 'Make your dong HUGE' or 'SCHOOL GIRLS AND DONKEYS'. Well, I wouldn't open the latter... again. I have an email account that I use solely to sign up for shit on the internet so it is the only one that get crammed with this garbage. I just don't understand how it is a profitable industry, can someone explain how that works to me plz??
5) The Stupid Motherfucker Stopped In The Merge Lane In Front Of Me
GODAMMIT, GO, USE THE PEDAL BESIDE THE ONE YOU ARE USING RIGHT NOW. IT IS FUCKING EASY, WHAT HAPPENS IS YOU GO FORWARDS AND SOME SERIOUS MOSES SHIT HAPPENS. A SPOT WILL MIRACULOUSLY APPEAR IN BETWEEN 2 CARS FOR YOU BECAUSE THAT IS HOW A MERGE LANE WORKS.
How did you pass your fucking driving test? How have you not been hit by a fucking bus crossing the street? So you have trouble eating and breathing at the same time? FUCK. Roadrage ftw.
6) Emoticons :-(
I AM HOOKED. I find myself using :P :) :( :0 in fucking emails all the time. WTF is wrong with me? I have even moved onto ^_^ and shit like that. GOOD GOD, SOMEONE SHOOT ME NOW. I feel like I am fucking 14.
Emoticons are gay :P
7) Baseball
Why isn't there a summer hockey league? I can't believe I have to wait till fucking October to see the puck drop again. </3
8) Lists
People who come up with just random shit and waste my time making me read their lame goddamn opinions about some useless garbage. It is all shit I have heard before and there is NEVER EVER anything new in a list. WRITE A FUCKING STORY OR SOMETHING YOU USELESS CUNT.
User Reviews
Submitted by zoobie2000 (user info) at 2007-07-12 19:46:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"who has already taken the giant black cock in the ass " - auto +2
Submitted by gascs (user info) at 2007-07-09 15:04:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
4) Email Spammers
Is there anyone left on the fucking planet that opens an email entitled 'Make your dong HUGE' or 'SCHOOL GIRLS AND DONKEYS'. Well, I wouldn't open the latter... again. I have an email account that I use solely to sign up for shit on the internet so it is the only one that get crammed with this garbage. I just don't understand how it is a profitable industry, can someone explain how that works to me plz??
_____________________________________________________
It takes virtually NO effort to send out a spam message to several thousand users, so there you go. They may only have a 0.001% success rate, but since they can send out hundreds of millions of emails a day, even if they only get a few cents for each "hit" they can still make money with very little work.
Submitted by sideshow (user info) at 2007-07-09 14:59:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
SOME SERIOUS MOSES SHIT HAPPENS
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2007-07-03 20:42:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate to ruin a perfect 1.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-07-03 20:26:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
bitch.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-07-02 11:26:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 Deftones
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-07-01 21:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-06-30 12:46:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/70427
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-06-30 12:29:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck ticketmaster. Seriously.
But I like baseball.
:D
Submitted by particle_man58 (user info) at 2007-06-30 11:38:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Fuck Hockey.....
It's almost time for Football....
WOOOO HOOO FOOTBALL!!!! YEAHHHH!!! GO PATS!!! FUCK EVERYONE ELSE!!!!
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-06-30 01:57:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Fatterrific (user info) at 2007-06-29 20:21:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by MichelleNJ (user info) at 2007-06-29 15:43:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-06-29 15:28:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
CRANKY OLD BASTARD
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2007-06-29 13:26:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2007-06-29 13:18:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
2) Veterans License Plates
Yes, thanks for fighting for my county 50 years ago. I really do appreciate it, but now you need to get your fucking caddy out of the fast lane because you are going 30kph under the fucking limit and I am about to have a fucking conniption. HOW DO YOU NOT NOTICE EVERY CAR PASSING YOU ON THE RIGHT HAND SIDE. I KNOW THAT YOU NEED TO MAKE A LEFT TURN IN 15KMS BUT FUCK, GET OUT OF THE WAY.
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To be fair, that has nothing to do with the plate. It's just old, slow people you are mad at. I have a veteran plate because certain states give you privileges if you do (ie: No parking tickets, no charge for registration renewal, HOV lane access with one person in te car.)
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To be equally fair, I can see the plate from a distance so I am pissed off when I arrive...
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2007-06-29 13:18:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
2) Veterans License Plates
Yes, thanks for fighting for my county 50 years ago. I really do appreciate it, but now you need to get your fucking caddy out of the fast lane because you are going 30kph under the fucking limit and I am about to have a fucking conniption. HOW DO YOU NOT NOTICE EVERY CAR PASSING YOU ON THE RIGHT HAND SIDE. I KNOW THAT YOU NEED TO MAKE A LEFT TURN IN 15KMS BUT FUCK, GET OUT OF THE WAY.
---------
To be fair, that has nothing to do with the plate. It's just old, slow people you are mad at. I have a veteran plate because certain states give you privileges if you do (ie: No parking tickets, no charge for registration renewal, HOV lane access with one person in te car.)
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:57:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Because of #5 being so brilliant, I could not possibly give this less than a +2.
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:44:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
As my Japanese friends say, "Supa terrific emoticon!" ^^
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:41:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
road rage ftw
I'm going to get a bumper sticker with that on it.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:35:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
:)
Submitted by EmoJean (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:34:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Free agency opens this weekend.
Look for Philly to steal either Gomez, Briere, or Drury off the market hastily.
I hope.
Submitted by lover101 (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:32:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
just because i like spam, the canned meat, not the e-mail
never mind
Submitted by PokeyMen (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:30:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.google.com/search?source=ig&hl=en&q=On+his+trip+back+up+the+aisle%2C+he+noticed+this+well-dressed+and+rather+
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:30:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Void_Where_Prohibited (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:22:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
For...
SOME SERIOUS MOSES SHIT HAPPENS
Submitted by raebuf (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:20:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who
seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.
As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that, "Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just put your trays up, that would be super."
On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather
Arabic looking woman hadn't moved a muscle. "Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines, but I asked you to raise your trazy-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground."
She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country, I am called a
Princess and I take orders from no one."
To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a
beat, "Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I out rank you. Tray up, Bitch."
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:16:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Burger King has added Spam to the menu in Hawaii.
http://www.happynews.com/news/6152007/burger-king-adds-spam-menu-hawaii.htm
http://www.redorbit.com/news/health/962925/burger_king_ignites_spam_war_with_rival/index.html
Jesus
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:10:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orph (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:07:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
well 4 and 6 made me laugh
emoticons are gay, WTF is wrong with you
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I know :(
FUCK, I CANT HELP MYSELF
Submitted by a_little_more_time (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:07:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"SERIOUS MOSES SHIT" = spit take.
Submitted by orph (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:07:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
well 4 and 6 made me laugh
emoticons are gay, WTF is wrong with you
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:07:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
thats fair, i was bored writing it, but there is not much left for me to read on the front page so i figured i may as well be part of the problem
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:06:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I had to re-read this to get to #8. I was a bit bored to read that far by then.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:05:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:03:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Not alot of originality with this one.
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See #8...
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-06-29 12:03:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Not alot of originality with this one.