Table and Chair (entry #1) (288 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: EpistolaryWritingContest
Rating: 1.45 on 11 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Epistolary Contest Entry (View user info) at 2007-07-09 02:14:52 EDT
Dearest Table,
I hope this letter finds you well, my beauty. It has been so long since
we've been together. I miss you dreadfully and think of you every day.
I miss the way your slender, honey coloured legs peeked out from beneath
your tablecloth, beckoning admiring eyes. I long to again touch your smooth,
polished surface and trace your delicate scrollwork. That always made you
giggle; I always loved how ticklish you were.
We were the perfect fit, you and I. I could slide easily under you, almost
without your noticing. You would sigh gently and stroke my arms. I would
smile and play with the tassels on your runner, teasing your brackets. And
when you put on your leaves, it left me breathless. You were always
embarrassed, saying you felt fat. But it was only more of you to love, my
sweet. You never kept them for long, anyhow.
You always loved to dress up for me: tablecloths of the finest materials and
delicate ornaments to play up your features. I always favoured your red
satin cloth. You remember the one, don't you? You always wore it with the
golden candlesticks and jeweled napkin rings. That outfit always drove me
wild; I'm getting more solid just thinking about it.
Then there was that odd day that we were sunning ourselves outdoors. I
thought it odd as we were rarely allowed this pleasure. I was speaking with
the hall tree, and when I turned back, you were gone. No one would say where
you went and why four of my brothers were missing as well. My last remaining
brother hadn't seen anything either, he was watching that harlot china hutch
open her doors for passerby. Then we were both picked up and carelessly
thrown in the back of a minivan. I had hoped it was taking me to you, but we
wound up what seems like a small, primary coloured torture chamber.
It's been hell on earth, my love. I am covered in all manner of snack food
and fruit juices. But I have fared better than my poor brother. He was
dismembered before my very eyes by the little monster that lives here. His
parents just laughed and said that they bet he'd be an engineer. I am
frightened for my safety, but that feeling nothing compared to my love for
you and my hope that we will one day be reunited.
I hope my letter has reached you, the kitchen utensils that accompanied us
swear that the information they have on your location is correct. I implore
you to write back as soon as you can and let me know that you are all right.
Yours in varnish,
Chair
User Reviews
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-07-10 19:25:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2007-07-09 22:46:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by blueboy (user info) at 2007-07-09 15:27:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by justagirl27 (user info) at 2007-07-09 12:40:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-09 12:28:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
THIS KICKS ASS
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-07-09 12:12:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-07-09 08:50:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-07-09 08:42:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-07-09 08:10:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by RabiedRooster (user info) at 2007-07-09 06:17:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-07-09 04:51:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was very good.