The Endgame (766 hits)
Category: Sound & MusicRating: 1.88 on 45 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Susie Derkins (View user info) at 2007-07-10 14:05:31 EDT
http://www.ubersite.com/u/Susie_Derkins/l/tmm for the rest of the series
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"Good," said John "Now step over to the car. Slowly."
Monkey Man walked over to the car with his hands up. Tweeter was already there, against the passenger door with a young state trooper frisking him. He felt John's gun poke him hard in the back of the neck.
"Against the car, Eddie. Now." Snarled John as he shoved Monkey Man against the hood. He kicked his legs apart and started searching his pockets.
"Can't we work out some kind of deal?" asked Monkey Man, "I can score you some more - "
"Shut up."
"What? What's the matter?" grinned Monkey Man, giving the state trooper a sidelong glance, "Ohhhh...not everyone knows you're a cokehead, huh?"
"You shut your mouth."
"Oh come on, John. It's not like you hide it very well. Anyone with half a brain can see you're in withdrawal. You're shaking, sweating, irritable...maybe you're like that anyway, but I doubt it."
"I said shut the fuck up!" screamed John as he grabbed Monkey Man by the back of the neck, repeatedly slamming his head against the hood. The trooper ran over to try and restrain John. Tweeter saw his opportunity. In one slow, fluid movement, he grabbed the gun out of the trooper's holster and put a bullet in the back of his head. The trooper slumped against John, who had stopped smashing Monkey Man's face at the sound of gunfire. He turned around to see Tweeter pointing the gun at him and the body of the trooper fell into the dust.
"Ok, buddy, let go of Monkey Man." He said calmly. John complied. "All right, now you're coming with us. Let's go, in the car."
"Tweeter, what are you doing?" asked Monkey Man
"You've done nothing but screw things up so far, so I'm taking over. Get in the car beside the cop."
"Ex-fucking-scuse me?"
"Get. In. The. Car." He was now pointing the gun at Monkey Man, who stared at him, wiping blood from his chin. Tweeter was the same as when the gun was on him: cool and unflinching. He spat a broken tooth into the dirt and got in the car, never taking his eyes off his partner.
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"You're not going to get very far," John said from the backseat, "They'll find the state trooper you killed and my empty car. They'll find you eventually and you'll be up shit creek."
Tweeter didn't acknowledge John with even a look in the rearview mirror; he instead hit the wipers to clear the light rain from the windshield. Monkey Man sat next to John with a gun in his lap, eyeing both of them.
"If you turn yourself in, you'll only go to jail. If you keep this up, you may die."
"Give it a rest, John." Monkey Man poked his arm with the gun, "Or you won't be given a choice of life or death."
"What? Fuck off."
"You want to test me, asshole?"
"Go right the hell ahead, Eddie. Shoot me. Put me out of my misery! Get it over with and shoot me right in the fucking head!"
"Don't tempt me, man, I've wanted to do that for years."
"Both of you shut up." Tweeter finally spoke up from the driver's seat. Everyone fell silent again. The rain got heavier outside; Tweeter turned the wipers on full. John looked out the window, Monkey Man's eyes boring into the back of his skull.
"Listen," John said, edging up his seat, "You're a reasonable man, right? At least more reasonable than this prick."
"Fuck you!" yelled Monkey Man.
"This can all end now. Just pull over, we'll call the local police and you can turn yourselves in."
"I can end this now, too, but you won't like it."
"Shut up, Eddie! Come on, Tweeter. I can make it so you serve a light sentence and you'll never have to see this guy again. What do you say?"
"I'll answer for him." Monkey man snarled and put his gun to John's temple. Tweeter's eyes grew wide in the rearview.
"Eddie, no!"
Monkey Man pulled the trigger. John fell against the door, smearing blood and brain matter down the window. Tweeter slammed on the brakes and turned to survey the damage.
"Jesus Christ, Eddie! What the hell were you thinking? He was our goddamn bargaining chip!"
Monkey Man sat still, staring at the dead undercover cop next to him. Tweeter looked too, waiting for a response. His only answer was the rain beating the roof of the Cadillac and the steady rhythm of the wipers. Monkey Man dropped the gun and looked up, goggle-eyed at Tweeter.
"What do we do now?" he asked.
"Get rid of his body I guess." Tweeter sighed.
They dragged John's lifeless body out of the car and carried him into the farmer's field they were parked next to. The rain was torrential at this point, causing the two men to keep slipping in the mud and dropping the body.
"Fuck this, man. This is far enough." Monkey Man puffed.
"We need to get him far enough so you can't see him from the highway. It'll buy us enough time to get away before someone spots him."
"Forget it, man." He dropped the dead man's legs to the mud, "You want him further, then you carry him."
Monkey Man stalked off back to the car. Tweeter dragged the body a few more feet, sliding and falling. He heard the car starting and looked back to the highway. Worried that he was going to be left, he pushed the body away from him. It sank, burping into the thick mud. He ran back to the highway as best he could.
"Come on, man!" Monkey Man yelled through the open door "Before the cops catch up!"
"We should have enough of a head start on them." Tweeter replied, wiping mud from his face.
"Don't be too sure, man. Bad news travels fast."
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"Put the gun down and get your hands up!"
"Fuck you!"
"You're a cop killer, Eddie. You're coming with us either in cuffs or a body bag."
"You'll have to shoot me, then!"
"Monkey Man, what are you doing?"
"Sorry, Tweeter. Better you than me."
"What, are you going to push me off this bridge?"
"No, man, you're my shield."
"WHAT?"
"Eddie, this is your last chance. Surrender yourself, we're not afraid to shoot through your partner to get to you."
"Fuckin' let me go!"
"No chance, man. You're my insurance: it'll take awhile for their bullets to get through you to me."
Monkey Man looked around Tweeter's torso and took aim at the closest cop and opened fire.
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"...the officer was wounded in the shoulder and was dragged to safety. The rest of the responding officers returned fire and both suspects were killed. The wounded officer is expected to make a full recovery. Aside from the two suspects, two police officers were killed in their crime spree: State Trooper Samuel Keswick and Detective John McPhee, an undercover vice squad officer. An internal investigation is underway to determine the validity of allegations that Detective McPhee was involved with the suspects...."
"Can I get another beer please?" I called down the bar as I folded up the newspaper.
I traded my empty bottle for a full one and went back to my table.
"You in on this hand?" asked Joe
"Yep, deal me in." I replied, throwing in the big blind. I checked out my hand: Big Chick, suited.
"So I hear you're skipping town."
"Yep. I think I've done everything there is to do here."
"And everyone" snickered Perry.
"Shut yer face. Raise."
"So where you gonna go?" Joe asked, calling my bet.
"I could use some colour on my skin, maybe Florida. I hear it's nice this time of year."
"Anywhere's nicer than Kingston at this time of year, honey." The flop came up queen of spades, ace of diamonds, four of clubs. I bet big.
"Hey, Dave! Put the game on!" yelled Perry.
"No can do, Perry. Crazy Louie destroyed the TV remember?"
Crazy Louie was a cokehead with rage issues, a stunning combination. He blamed most of his problems on Monkey Man, both for hooking him and then for cutting out without warning. So on top of losing his job, his wife and his life savings, he had lost his dealer. When the news came on that Monkey Man was dead, he was so angry he'd never get his revenge that he drew his gun and pulled an Elvis. We heard that he had shot himself in his bedroom later that night. "Crazy" wasn't just a clever nickname.
"Call." Perry threw in his chips.
"I'm out." Joe threw in his cards.
Turn card: three of hearts. I bet big again.
I didn't feel so bad that Monkey Man was dead. I felt really bad for Jan. Apparently she had shown up just as they were zipping the two men up in body bags. So in the midst of her hysteria from losing her lover, they decided to tell her about John. They ended up having to take her to the hospital and sedating her. Poor girl, I hope they keep her long enough so she can detox.
"Call."
Then there was Tweeter. I have to take some of the blame for this one. If I hadn't introduced him to that scumbag, he'd still be alive and we might still be together. But, I shouldn't beat myself up too much. I didn't put a gun to his head, did I?
"All in, baby. Go big or go home." Perry crowed.
I looked at the river: the ace of spades.
"I call." I said, "Lets see what you have."
"Three of a kind aces!"
"Sorry, Per. Full house aces over queens."
"Shit! Well, that's the rest of my paycheque this week." He grumbled.
"Looks like you got yer travel money, Josie." Snickered Joe.
"No hard feelings, Per?" I asked sweetly.
"Buy me a beer and we're even."
"How about I buy for the rest of the night?"
"What are you, rich or somethin'? You didn't win that much off me."
I smiled and gestured to Dave to bring a round to the table.
"Hey, speakin' of rich. I heard that Monkey Man had a stash of his own, drugs and money. That true, Josie?"
"Course it's not true, Perry!" said Joe, "If he had spare money, why would he always be moochin' off people the way he was?"
"Josie?" Perry ignored Joe, still looking to me for an answer. I just kept smiling and paid for the beers with my winnings.
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"Hey, baby, come here." Says Eddie.
We're in his apartment, watching television. He gets up, sits on the floor and pulls up a strip of wallpaper that was discreetly held on with pins, revealing a small hole in the wall. He reaches his hand in and pulls out a few wads of cash, it looks like a few thousand. He reaches back in and comes up with a few bricks of cocaine, worth even more.
"Anything happens to me, you take this and leave town. Got it?"
I nod, and watch as he puts everything back and pin the wallpaper back in place. He stands and puts his hands on my hips, pulling me in.
"I take good care of you, don't I, baby?"
User Reviews
Submitted by Lurby (user info) at 2008-07-05 15:23:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Entertaining
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-12 10:05:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
THERE'S A REASON YOU NEVER POST ANYTHING BELOW THE NECK ON HERE, WHAT WITH THAT PERVERTED FREAK ROB BERG RUNNING ABOUT WITHOUT A LEASH!!
SURGERY?? SO THOSE aren't LYMPH NODES??!
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-12 09:53:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I CAN BARELY FIT THROUGH THE DOOR ANYMORE :( AND YOUR BROTHER OWES ME THE $1500 THAT I FRONTED FOR HIS SURGERY...BET HE DIDN'T TELL YOU ABOUT THAT.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-12 09:48:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't give Suze a bigger head than she's already got. She's topheavy enough as it is. AND SHE STILL OWES MY BROTHER $600!
Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-07-11 22:03:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What are you talking about dude? S.D. is easily the hottest female to post here.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-11 14:19:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YOUR EYEBROWS FRIGHTEN AND ENTERTAIN ME! IT'S LIKE A HAUNTED HOUSE FULL OF REALLY CREEPY 12 YEAR OLD JAPANESE CHICKS LIKE FROM THE GRUDGE (only female of course) WHO DRESS IN CANCAN OUTFITS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Bohme (user info) at 2007-07-11 05:37:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I CANT FUCKING SLEEP
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2007-07-11 02:25:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hard to decide which one is the story i should review
to play it safe....
they are both entertaining
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-07-11 01:28:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 23:38:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AND IF YOU SAY WHY YOU CALL ME HIPPY I WILL SEND THE ENTIRE PENANG CREW OVER TO RESIDE YOUR HOUSE!!!!
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 23:37:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm about as UN-hippy as you can get, McDerkins.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-10 22:45:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And technically I'm not British because southern Ireland is not included in the United Kingdom.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-10 22:43:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
But....you're still a BIT English. And I'm....not a bit French. Damn....well....I STILL FART IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION, HIPPIE.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 22:41:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dude, you're British and I'm (at least a bit) French (but mostly Native and somewhat British)... you got it all backwards.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-10 22:40:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I couldn't possibly spill his brother's secret on the air...
Icky - YOU DON'T FRIGHTEN ME, ENGLISH PIG DOG. GO AND BOIL YOUR BOTTOM, YOU SON OF A SILLY PERSON. I BLOW MY NOSE AT YOU.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 22:37:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
TELL AND I'M COMING UP THERE WITH MY 24 POUND CARRONADE, DERKINS.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-07-10 22:18:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:58:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't see why you're making this public, but since you're insisting: Alphonse let me in on a rather important piece of information at the last minute. That piece of info was enough to keep me from coming. If he'd let me know before he booked the tickets, I would never have agreed. If he wants the $600, he can ask me himself.
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GAAAAHHHHHH!
WHAT? Oh. come. ON!
Was he married?
...trans-gender?
...a talking goat?
...still living with his creepy Uncle Hank? His Mom? The Gypsies?
Did he have a thing for dressing up in crushed velvet jumpsuits and jackin' off to re-runs of M*A*S*H?
What WHAT WHHHHAAAAT could possibly be said in a phone call that would cause you to cancel this mystery trip?
Pretty please? I won't tell anyone. Promise.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 21:43:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-10 19:01:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 17:09:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YOUR EARS AREN'T CHUBBY THEY JUST STICK OUT TOO FAR!!! ITS YOUR CHIPMUNK CHEEKS THAT MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE AN INFECTED HOWLER MONKEY!!!!!!!!!!
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MY SECRET SHAME *WEEPS* AT LEAST MY EYEBROWS DON'T MAKE ME LOOK LIKE A RABID LLAMA IN HEAT.
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No, they make you look like a petulent 12-year-old :(
Submitted by BananaPhone (user info) at 2007-07-10 19:27:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Amazing series off amazing song.
I always thought Tweeter was a girl in the end; after a sex change maybe? Or maybe I'm wayyyy off.
...Now the town of Jersey City is quietin' down again
I'm sittin' in a gamblin club called the Lion's Den
The TV set was blown up, every bit of it was gone
Ever since the nightly news show the Monkey Man was on
I guess I'll go to Florida, get myself some sun
There ain't no more opportunity here, everything been done
Sometimes I think of Tweeter, sometimes I think of Jan
Sometimes I don't think about nuthin' but the Monkey Man
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-10 19:01:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 17:09:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YOUR EARS AREN'T CHUBBY THEY JUST STICK OUT TOO FAR!!! ITS YOUR CHIPMUNK CHEEKS THAT MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE AN INFECTED HOWLER MONKEY!!!!!!!!!!
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MY SECRET SHAME *WEEPS* AT LEAST MY EYEBROWS DON'T MAKE ME LOOK LIKE A RABID LLAMA IN HEAT.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-07-10 18:27:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2007-07-10 18:21:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nifty-neato.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-07-10 17:17:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fuck....:(
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-07-10 17:13:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I loved this.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 17:09:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YOUR EARS AREN'T CHUBBY THEY JUST STICK OUT TOO FAR!!! ITS YOUR CHIPMUNK CHEEKS THAT MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE AN INFECTED HOWLER MONKEY!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-07-10 16:29:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Absolutely fucking phenomenal. Loved the story and your writing style.
Hats off to you.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-10 15:39:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I ONLY THREW HIM OUT OF A MOVING HYDROFOIL BECAUSE HE SAID MY EARS WERE CHUBBY!
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 15:23:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Email is out here, Suze. Hence no plural.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-07-10 15:12:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
aaaaaand back to the actual post.
Well written SusieD
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-07-10 15:07:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
good post but drama?
deeeeezamn
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-10 15:06:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm shooting the messenger over the method of delivery. Your emaiL (note the lack of plural) started off rather nasty, so I wasn't inclined to continue reading or respond to it. If you want to talk about this further, please email me and keep it off the public forum.
Don't worry, Merlina, this drama is finished. Thanks for the hearts :)
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-07-10 15:03:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oops... uberdrama
*leaves room*
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 15:00:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dude, what am I supposed to do? You won't answer my emails. I don't know how he feels about the $600 specifically, but he seems to think that you screwed him over. Don't shoot the messenger.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:58:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't see why you're making this public, but since you're insisting: Alphonse let me in on a rather important piece of information at the last minute. That piece of info was enough to keep me from coming. If he'd let me know before he booked the tickets, I would never have agreed. If he wants the $600, he can ask me himself.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:58:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:52:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It did run him $600 approx.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:51:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, you sort of ditched out on the plane ticket, but seriously, that's his affair, not mine.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:46:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I *heart* SusieDerkins
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:46:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Icky, Alphonse told me that you were angry with me and didn't want anything to do with me again. And I didn't screw him over, it was quite the opposite.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:37:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:35:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good and all, but seriously, wtf is up with not talking to me? I mean screwing Alphonse over is one thing; it doesnt mean you have to carry the gripe against me.
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:21:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hokay
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:20:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I haven't read the other stuff, but this was fun.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:07:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2007-07-10 14:06:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Every time I see this title I duck and cover because I expect it to be a Samuel Beckett reference.
Now to read it