dsklafjsdi'mstillfuckingtitlesasdlkfjlksdjfhahahaha (337 hits)
Category: PoliticsRating: -1.44 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by thecrystalship (View user info) at 2007-07-12 14:15:39 EDT
The place where we find ourselves at least once a day for the ritual purpose of bettering our hygiene. The place were I often find myself, well, entertaining myself. No, not that way you sick bastard, this isn't amateur hour.
Usually I will sing in the shower, sometimes I will make up rhymes or my own songs and then laugh at my genius. Other times I will think out loud, responding to myself, asking questions and then answering them. When I am in a spry mood, which is almost always, I will turn the water to its coldest and yell out, "I'm alive, I'm alive!" It gives me a great thrill, I suggest you try it, plus it is entertaining that people can hear me ranting and raving in the bathroom in this manner. Today I tried something new, something that I doubt I will ever attempt again. You see, the drain is a bit plugged so there was about an inch of water on the bottom of the shower and I figured it would be a fun game to try and dodge some urine, and so I let a little spill out. Well my friends, this is indeed a fun game, at first anyway. I took much delight in dancing about the shower trying to avoid the yellow concentration. The splashing water turned it lose and it started to diffuse, this was even more fun because now it was chasing me, but as I stood in the far corner with no further place to go I realized that the game was about to be over and that I was going to lose. Yes, I stood in the corner crying tears, whimpering, and begging it as if it were some living entity. "Please, you win, don't touch me, please, I'll do anything" but it didn't listen.
Since I am discussing the bathroom I would like to discuss the re-use of towels. I don't like anything that has come in contact with my asshole (I know where it has been and what it does for a living) or anyone's asshole to touch my face unless it has at least one degree of separation. If you don't know what I mean, you wouldn't want to know.
User Reviews
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-07-13 16:14:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
for pisssing them all off
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:52:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
uber
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:51:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
lacks
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:45:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
freedom
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:33:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Strange, but not in one of those cool interesting ways.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:32:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No point mentioning those bats, I thought. The poor bastard will see them soon enough.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:32:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
TEH PLAEC WHERA WE FIND OURSELVAS AT L3AST ONCA A DAY FOR TEH RITUAL PURPOS3 OF BT3RNG OUR HYGEINE!!!!1!!1! WTF TEH PLAEC W3RE I OFTAN FIND MYS3LF W3L 3NTERTANENG MYS3LF!!!!1!! OMG WTF NO NOT TAHT WAY U SIK BASTARD THES ISNT MAETUR HOUR!11!1
USUALY I WIL SNG IN DA SHOW3R SOM3TIEMS I WIL MAEK UP RHYM3S OR MAH OWN SONGS AND TH3N LAUGH AT MAH GANIUS!1!!1!1! OMG LOL OTH3R TIEMS I WIL THINK OUT LOUD RASPONDNG 2 MYSALF ASKNG QUASTIONS AND THEN ANSWERNG THEM!1!111 LOL WH3N IM IN A SPRY MOD WHICH SI ALMOST ALWAYS I WIL TURN DA W8R 2 ITS COLDEST AND YEL OUT IMM ALIEV IMM ALIEV!!!11 WTF IT GIEVS MA A GR3AT THRIL I SUGAST U TRY IT PLUS IT SI ENT3RTANENG TAHT PEOPLE CAN H3AR ME RANTNG AND RAVNG IN TEH BATHROM IN THES MANAR!!!!1!11 LOL 2DAY I TREID SOMETHNG NAW SOMATHNG TAHT I DOUBT I WIL 3VAR ATEMPT AGANE!!1111 OMG WTF LOL U SE DA DRANE SI A BIT PLUGAD SO THEYRE WAS ABOUT AN INCH OF W8R ON DA BOTOM OF DA SHOWER AND I FIGURED IT WUD B A FUN GME 2 TRY AND DODG3 SOM3 URIEN AND SO I L3T A LITLE SPIL OUT!!1111 W3L MAH FREINDS THES SI INDED A FUN GMA AT FIRST ANYWAY!1111! LOL I 2K MUCH DELIGHT IN DANCNG ABOUT DA SHOWAR TRYNG 2 AVOID DA YELOW CONCENTRATION!!!11 WTF DA SPLASHNG W8R TURN3D IT LOS3 AND IT START3D 2 DIFUES THES WAS EVAN MORE FUN B/C NOW IT WAS CHASNG MA BUT AS I S2D IN DA FAR CORN3R WIT NO FURTHER PLAEC 2 GO I R3ALIEZD TAHT DA GME WAS ABOUT 2 B OVER AND TAHT I WAS GONG 2 LOS3!!11!1! WTF YAS I S2D IN DA CORNER CRYNG TAARS WHIMPERNG AND BGNG IT AS IF IT WERE SOME LIVNG 3NTITY!!!!!!111 PLZ U WIN DONT 2UCH MA PLZ IL DO ANYTHNG BUT IT DIDNT LISTEN!!!!!11 OMG WTF LOL
SINCE IM DISCUSNG TEH BATHROM I WUD LIEK 2 DISCUS DA R3-UES OF 2W3LS!!1!111!! OMG I DONT LIEK ANYTHNG TAHT HAS COME IN CONTACT WIT MAH ASHOLE (I KNOW WHER3 IT HAS B3N AND WUT IT DO3S FOR A LIVNG) OR ANYON3S ASHOLE 2 2UCH MAH FAEC UNL3S IT HAS AT LEAST ONE DEGRE OF SEPARATION!1!!1 OMG WTF IF U DONT KNOW WUT I MEAN U WUDNT WANT 2 KNOW!!111! LOL
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:31:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yes, it did. Didn't you get the memo?
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:30:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, did this turn into a serious writers' forum when I was gone? lol
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:29:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
good luck with that
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:22:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
so we've been reduced to just typing random words?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:21:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Not afuckinggain.
Submitted by lover101 (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:18:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
drugs are bad
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:18:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't like anything that has come in contact with my asshole (I know where it has been and what it does for a living)
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So how's being a male prostitute working out for you?
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2007-07-12 14:16:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
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