Halloween (379 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.5 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by QuinnTheEskimo (View user info) at 2007-07-16 07:51:23 EDT
"You're never gonna make it over, lard ass."
"Shut-up, Kevin!" Candy said as she huffed her way into the tree and over the wrought iron fence.
"It's true." Kevin ended lamely.
"Shut-up both of you." Christy whispered. "Aren't there supposed to be dogs?"
Kevin paused. "I don't hear anything."
Candy waddled up to the conversation. "Can't they have that barking think cut out?"
"It's the larynx. Jesus Candy, how do you find a door to get out of the house in the morning? And once you do, how do you fit through?"
Candy shoved Kevin into a sapling, which a trunk almost seeming wider than Kevin's slender shoulders. The little tree shook with the force of the impact, and made a rustling noise.
"Jesus Kevin, are you paranoid or what? Why would you ever put a sticker with your name and address on your camcorder? That's stupid. When would you leave an expensive piece of recording equipment just laying around somewhere?" Christy said, after taking the camcorder from Kevin.
Kevin stared at her. "Are you that stoned? That's exactly what we're doing here."
Christy looked confused for a minute, then said, "Let's put it on that big cross one over there."
They pointed the camcorder so that it could record the most graveyard.
"Should we say 'Bloody Mary' a few dozen times or what?" Candy asked.
"I dunno," Christy turned to Kevin. "Recording ghosts was this guy's idea."
Kevin's already high voice jumped an octave, "Fuck you guys, I was smoking and watching Roots when I thought of that."
"Let's go before someone sees us."
Kevin turned and was blinded by a flashlight in the hands of a cemetery grounds keeper. In his other hand, the grounds keeper held the leashes of two large dogs, and they looked hungry.
"Who're yeh?" He asked in a thick Irish accent.
But the trio of teenagers were off in a flash, tearing back towards the tree they had used to climb into the grave yard. Behind them they could hear the dogs barking and panting, sometimes close enough to snap at their heels. They knew they wouldn't make it, so they immediately sought an alternative: the saplings dotting the bone yard.
Kevin swung into one and it bowed slightly under his weight. Christy scrambled into a different one and it bowed more. Candy grabbed the branches of a third and it simply bent over sideways under her weight. Couldn't even support her a little, so Candy returned to plan A: the fence.
Christy and Kevin watched as the dogs ignored them and started after Candy. Her polyester pants jiggled on her huge frame, the dogs seem almost hypnotized as they chased her. Seeing a chance to escape Kevin and Christy booked it for the fence. As he ran, Kevin took off his glasses and tucked them into his collar. He started taking shorter, faster steps, and, without breaking his glasses, he jumped through the wrought iron fence.
Christy jumped and managed to get a single leg over, but then she was stuck there, on top of the fence. One leg on one side and the other on the other, she supported her mass on her hands which grasped the upper cross brace of the fence tightly.
Kevin turned to look at her for only a minute before running away and leaving her.Out of nowhere, Candy appeared, and grabbed onto Christy's leg, trying to climb her over the fence. Christy shook Candy off, but lost her balance and fell off the fence outside of the graveyard. She looked at Candy, and Candy looked at her, and then Kevin was there, reaching his hands though the bars, and knotting them together to provide a step for Candy.
She kind of rolled over the fence and the three of them ran back to Kevin's car, which he had run off to get and bring back.
They managed to make it all the way to his house before Candy asked "Did we leave the camcorder there?"
"Yeah." Christy asked, looking at Kevin. "Wasn't I the one that suggested we go to that costume party?"
"Fuck both of you. Shit heads."
User Reviews
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2007-11-16 00:40:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-07-27 10:36:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-07-16 16:38:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
?
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2007-07-16 10:38:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-07-16 08:22:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not your best.
Submitted by RabiedRooster (user info) at 2007-07-16 08:05:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Just what the fuck was that supposed to be?
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-07-16 08:02:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Auto -2 b/c the dogs didn't eat the fat girl.