The Second Annual Übersite Geek-Off! (795 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 0.61 on 41 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by frankthebear (View user info) at 2007-07-20 16:03:07 EDT
The Second Annual Übersite Geek-Off!
Okay all you greasy little Über-geeks, the time has come once again!
I know it's a little early this year, but there's been so much drama around here lately between Simon and Bret (again) that I feel we need a light hearted start to the weekend.
So compose your list of geeky qualities and post them under the title "Geek-off Entry."
The Geek-off will go on for until next Friday, and I will compile and judge the entries, rating from 1-10 on the Geektometer, to be posted on Saturday.
So here's my own list.
1. I have vols. 1-14 of the Dragon Ball manga.
2. I have the entire set of the Chobits manga.
3. I have all four Beatles "Yellow Submarine" figures.
4. My ring tone is the theme from Knight Rider.
5. I completely agree with The Angry Video Game Nerd.
6. When I was a kid, I used to dream of pwning the shit out of Freddy Krueger.
7. If I had a light saber, I know I'd just walk around with it on all day, waving it at everything.
8. I'd kill just about any of you to get a flying car.
9. I miss the Übersite Superfriends.
10. If I could go back in time to any point in history, I'd go to the original Woodstock festival.
11. I want "Where Do They Make Baloons?" by They Might Be Giants played at my funeral.
12. I cannot express my frustration that the Generation X movie was never put on DVD, so I had to download it so I could finally watch it since I wasn't allowed to watch it the ONE TIME IT WAS EVER ON TV!!!
13. I'm just waiting for the military to start recruiting Gundam pilots.
14. Transformers the movie exceeded my wildest expectations.
15. Spider-Man 3 was just okay.
16. Final Fantasy 12 let me down.
17. I'm bummed because I don't have time to play Dungeons and Dragons any more.
18. I wrote a Dungeons and Dragons fan film (pending production).
19. I have a strong suspicion that Tenacious D was inspired by Uriah Heap.
20. I'm having a hard time coming up with a reason why I shouldn't get a copy of the original Ninja Turtles movie on DVD.
21. I am on a quest to find every obscure movie Mark Hamill ever appeared in.
22. The ultimate death match would be between Bon Jovi and a blade of grass. Bon Jovi would yell at the grass, but then the grass would get mad...
23. I fondly remember the old Pac Man cartoon.
24. I wish they would bring back the Super Mario Bros. Super Show.
25. I eagerly await my copy of Marvel Zombies from the comic shop.
26. I still think Kurt Russel should have played Wolverine.
27. Dumbledore's not dead!
28. Snape's not a bad guy!
29. Sasquatch is real, he just hasn't paid for his P.O. Box recently.
30. I firmly believe in aliens. It's impossible to believe we're alone in a galaxy as big as ours is.
31. Steinbeck was better than Hemingway. No contest.
32. My dream home is a human-sized Hobbit hole.
33. I'd never wear shoes if I didn't have to.
34. I've been experimenting with subliminal hypnotization to give myself photographic memory. So far it's not working.
35. If I had the choice, I'd team up with Captain America. Sure he's better than me at everything, but he wouldn't make me feel bad about it.
36. I actually had nightmares about "The Blair Witch Project."
37. I've wasted countless hours of valuable time trying to figure out how Mega Man's X Buster can contain all the hardware needed to emulate his enemies attacks and still have room inside for his ginormous anime hand.
39. I used to have a ferret named Strawberry Fields. I originally chose the name for a parrot, but they're too damn expensive.
40. I can quote every character verbatim from the "Constitutional Peasant" scene from Monty Python's Holy Grail.
There it is gang! The Übersite Geek-Off has officially begun!
User Reviews
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2007-07-23 03:26:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
..........whoa frankie.
this is pretty bad.
+1 for the balls to admit to all this.
hmm, i used to play D&D but at 19 grrl's and hotrods took precedent.
apocalypse books and alan.
fallout as a game was good and thanks to you so was the second installment. cant be bothered to gethe third, though.
thats about it for me.
Submitted by Darth_Famine (user info) at 2007-07-21 19:30:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
one more thing, I stopped at 43 but I could have kept going, prolly to at least 150
Submitted by Darth_Famine (user info) at 2007-07-21 19:23:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ok mygeekfest items
1) Read my username here on Ubersite
2) I run a Jedi Academy Server on the web
2) I can't Count
3) Darth Famine is my Character from the tabletop star wars RPG (darkside game ages ago)
4) I still have all of my Dungeons and Dragon books
5) I'm teaching my kids how to play so i'll have someone to game with
6) I have 9 count them 9 computers on my lan (with a combined storage capacity of over 2 terrabytes)
7) I own over 20 swords
8) I have a nice collection of lightsabers
9) I have complete deckplas of the original USS Enterprise (ToS)
10) I married a woman who games (yes they do exist)
11) My wife is a better Game Master than I am
12) I have a 43 inch flatscreen monitor hooked to one of my computers
13) I think Pirates and Ninjas are both cool
14) I can recite the etire movie Spaceballs from memory
15) Mel Brooks is a god!
16) My Paladin recently ascended to godhood
17) I rabidly follow control alt delete (the comic)
18) I own alot of shirts with dragons on them
19) My kids named my convertible optimus prime the first time they saw it transform
20) I have worked tech support for a living
21) All of the following kick ass
Transformers cartoons (the original only)
Thundercats
GI Joe
Voltron (Lions not cars)
and a few other cartoons from back in the day
22) Yoda Guards my bedroom door
23) Anakin is on the wall next to him
24) I have spent time trying to move a salt shaker with the force
25) Robot Chicken is the shit!
26) I still don't understand why my jedi mind trick doesn't work on my wife
27) I have an original poster for the movie Psycho on my living room wall
28) My daughters both have names after fictional characters in my D&D Game
29) My youngest daughter is named after a city that sits in splendor high atop Kolvir
30) I have a large collection of broken keyboards in the barn
31) Kirk could Kick Picard's Ass!
32) Picard doesn't need fake hair to get laid
33) Code monkeys is the shit
34) I keep a copy of the evil overlord to do list handy just in case I suddenly become all powerful.
35) I have the tech trees for 2 of the Civ games haging on the wall
36) Some of my Game characters are framed and on the wall
37) Sepiroth is the shit
38) I can quote shakespere
39) I can quote Yoda better
40) I wish I had the ability to traverse shadow
41) The Man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed
42) I am going to stop thinking on this list now so I can read the new Harry Potter book
43) I'm composing this list on my laptop wirelessly while sitting at my desk with my back to the PC on it
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-07-21 08:58:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
http://www.ubersite.com/m/110347
Submitted by storm (user info) at 2007-07-21 07:19:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
There is nothing brag worthy about being a geek.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2007-07-21 03:40:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You'll really you can beat Iron Geek American?
Everything you ever wanted to know about Shlongy
User id: 10879
# Reviews written: 32767
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-07-20 21:17:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey whatever gets you off.
But part of me feels sorry for you.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-07-20 21:12:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-07-20 19:51:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
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RONIN = BEST MOVIE EVER
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I fucking hated that movie.
Submitted by frankthebear (user info) at 2007-07-20 20:56:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I would love it if Bart decided to enter
Submitted by frankthebear (user info) at 2007-07-20 20:54:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
34. I've been experimenting with subliminal hypnotization to give myself photographic memory. So far it's not working.
________________________________________
I know, I know, the actual word is "hypnosis," I just couldn't remember it at the time
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-07-20 19:51:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-07-20 18:20:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*stunned silence*
Y'know, I often feel that there is a lot more I can do with my life.
I've seen more countries than I can easily count ('cause I ran out of fingers a few years ago).
My job, on occasion, resembles a much less cool version of the movie, Ronin.
If I really, really need an ego boost, it is completely within my power to make at least 80% of the people around me cry.
If ETS knew who was really reading all the shite he posts, he would almost certainly have an instant aneurysm.
I'm 25 freakin' years old.
...
Seriously, some of you fuckers need to get out more.
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RONIN = BEST MOVIE EVER
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-07-20 19:01:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
21. I am on a quest to find every obscure movie Mark Hamill ever appeared in.
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Mark Hamill does the voice for the Government representitive in Metalocalypse, a cartoon show about a heavy metal band "Dethklok" shown on Adult Swim.
You're pretty nerdy, but;
1) I own "The Pythons Autobiography by The Pythons".
2) Futurama: All seasons.
3) Raymond E. Feist: All books.
4) Ian M. Banks: All books.
5) I want to understand Quantum Theory and the basis of String theory and extra-dimensional space. I'm currently downloading Cube 2: Hypercube because it's set in a 4D prison. This interests me intently, and it pisses off my girlfriend no end.
6) I own War Games on DVD, but I also own a t-shirt with "The only winning move is not to play" written underneath the Global Thermonuclear War missile launch animation.
7) I wear these shirts out: http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts/frustrations/388b/ and http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts/generic/6692/ People ask me what this one means, and then they stop talking to me. Their loss.
8) I play World of Warcraft. A lot.
9) My favourite movie is Donnie Darko. Again, time travel.
10) I am finding winning this contest more important every time I add something.
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-07-20 18:20:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*stunned silence*
Y'know, I often feel that there is a lot more I can do with my life.
I've seen more countries than I can easily count ('cause I ran out of fingers a few years ago).
My job, on occasion, resembles a much less cool version of the movie, Ronin.
If I really, really need an ego boost, it is completely within my power to make at least 80% of the people around me cry.
If ETS knew who was really reading all the shite he posts, he would almost certainly have an instant aneurysm.
I'm 25 freakin' years old.
...
Seriously, some of you fuckers need to get out more.
Submitted by Tavo (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:38:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:37:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I once killed a man just to see the look on his face. But then I got distracted at the last minute and missed it. :-(
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SO then how did you kill him????
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:37:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I once killed a man just to see the look on his face. But then I got distracted at the last minute and missed it. :-(
Submitted by Tavo (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:35:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by frankthebear (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:22:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
c'mon Zig, Tavo, this is about having fun, not putting people down or questioning their interpersonal skills.
now get along or I'm gonna have to come back there and seperate you two!
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Yes dad.... sorry about that...
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:33:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Geeky.
Submitted by frankthebear (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:23:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sorry, I meant "Zeg"
Submitted by frankthebear (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:22:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
c'mon Zig, Tavo, this is about having fun, not putting people down or questioning their interpersonal skills.
now get along or I'm gonna have to come back there and seperate you two!
Submitted by wretchel_o (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:18:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have every episode of Conan O'Brian illegally downloaded and burned to DVD, and have pwnd in Counterstrike while at work.
man, it's great being in IT at a college.
Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:18:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
There is a diffrence between being a faceless nobody intarweb geek, and getting outside in the real world. I don't talk about Inuyasha or the pros and cons of hyperthreading when I go out. I know how to dress and I can dance. If you can dance, you're in. Its just that simple. Women love to dance.
Submitted by Tavo (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:12:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:44:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Your forgot 41. Im still a virgin
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pwned!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Tavo (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:08:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:34:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
5.) I have on more than 1 occasion lied to girls who wanted me to come to the club with them, saying I was sick/tired/had to work in the morning, just so I could continue playing video games.
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What a fucking liar... with a list like this we know you have never been invited to the club by girls... but I like your anime collection... so you get a neutral 0
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-07-20 17:03:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I fail to see how anyone here can pretend they aren't a geek. If you've actually posted on Ubersite, you are in fact a geek. If you FOUND Ubersite, you are a geek. You may be a different type of geek (music geek, art geek, poet geek) but you're still a geek. Even if you are a geek in denial.
Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:52:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
honestly whats with the "OMG UR A VIRGIN LOLZ" insult on the internet? Am I the only one who has been to a bar and seen that drunk girl in the corner crying about her boyfriend? Am I the only one who knows you can literally just sit next to her and smile. Hold her hair while she pukes in 20 minutes, and you're beating the brakes off her within an hour?
Seriously it takes absolutely no game what so ever to get laid. Go to a bar, find the drunkest girl there and be nice to her for an hour. There you go, no more virginity. I don't understand how anyone in this day and age could honestly be a virgin because of anything other than personal choice.
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:50:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
FINALLY, there's a customer for all the advertising shit on the uberboard! Go learn the secrets of casanova.
Submitted by lover101 (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:46:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:34:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
14.) I pwn in pogs + Jacks
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I used to LOVE pogs! But, then again, I was like 10 to 13 at the time they were "cool".
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:44:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Your forgot 41. Im still a virgin
Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:34:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
uhh my list is definately going to blow chode compared to most of yours but fuck it I'll try to list things that are geeky about me.
1.)I was the 3rd person to hit 60 on Illidan server of World of Warcraft. (alliance)
2.)I held #1 for Infiltrator class on Mordred server of Dark Ages of Camelot for almost 3 years straight. (I got banned for speedhacking 01FEB of this year, or else I'd still be #1. Cuz after 5 months of ban, I am still in the top 10 lmao)
3.) I STILL play with Legos once in a while when I go home and visit my mother. She for what ever reason has yet to throw them away so every time without fail I bust them out and play with em.
4.) I own and am very proud of my original Super Soaker with that tiny little water container good for about 5 minutes, tops.
5.) I have on more than 1 occasion lied to girls who wanted me to come to the club with them, saying I was sick/tired/had to work in the morning, just so I could continue playing video games.
6.) I kept the install file of the original AOL INSTANT MESSANGER because I HATE their new ad filled BULLSHIT.
7.) I have played Warhammer table top games. I had a fucking blast doing it too.
8.) I've played video games so long, I sometimes hear theme songs from specific levels of random games in my dreams. Thats not even the sad part though, the sad part is I can more often than not instantly recognize exactly what level of what game its from.
9.) I have said "El oh el" out loud before.
10.) just last night when I won a round in beer pong against a friend of mine, I said "Im in ur base, killin all ur d00dz" (shamefully I am not kidding, I really did say that to him)
11.) I have the entire sagas of Full Metal Alchemist, Inuyasha, Blue, Cowboy Bebop, Witchhunter, and all associated movies on my computer.
12.) I have One Winged Angel, The Real Folk Blues, The Gremlins Theme Song, and assorted video game theme songs on my Ipod.
13.) I caught 'em all. Twice. (I even exploited in the gameboy version swimming on the shore of that island to get a level 166 Rapidash)
14.) I pwn in pogs + Jacks.
Thats all I got :P
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:32:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:28:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:23:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
everything of yours that i read depresses the hell out of me.
i just sigh and feel uncomfortable and kind of sorry for you.
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man, I don't even have the heart to deliver the -2 that this shit deserves.
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:28:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:23:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
everything of yours that i read depresses the hell out of me.
i just sigh and feel uncomfortable and kind of sorry for you.
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man, I don't even have the heart to deliver the -2 that this shit deserves.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:27:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
number 14
+2
pure fluke on Bay's part mind
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:27:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
4. My ring tone is the theme from Knight Rider.
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Dude, I so totally need that.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:23:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
everything of yours that i read depresses the hell out of me.
i just sigh and feel uncomfortable and kind of sorry for you.
Submitted by frankthebear (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:19:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:10:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
cannot express my frustration that the Generation X movie was never put on DVD
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When did this happen? It must have been during the 2 year interval when I did not have cable television. Where, please, did you download it?
_______________________________________________
It was back in '96. I downloaded it from WinMx. I had to wait 11 years to see it. It was worth it.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:19:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
When you're done "geeking off", can you and all of the other geek assholes get back to MAKING MY FUCKING FRIES???
Submitted by Cyrus (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:17:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you win
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:11:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
After reading your list it occurrs to me that, apparently, you are under the mistaken impression that "G-e-e-k" spells "Lose".
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:10:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
cannot express my frustration that the Generation X movie was never put on DVD
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When did this happen? It must have been during the 2 year interval when I did not have cable television. Where, please, did you download it?
Submitted by raebuf (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:06:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
8. I'd kill just about any of you to get a flying car.
_____________________
Nothing nerdy about that.
Submitted by a_little_more_time (user info) at 2007-07-20 16:06:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, it is fucking ON.
YES, it is.