The Charvaes Alphabet: ABCs for Social Scum (2033 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.78 on 114 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by TTOM: Chaving it up (View user info) at 2007-08-06 08:12:35 EDT
Warning: Britcentric.
User Reviews
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2007-08-09 07:19:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I got started on by an old crazy drunk in the pub the other day. He had all corners covered; one arm (check) grizzled appearance (check) combat everything (check) incoherent (check) covered in scars and asking everyone if they'd been 'inside' (check) frighteningly abusive (check) EXQUISITELY drunk (check)
The only reason I didn't get our lovely landlady to get him out of MY damned pub was because he cleared the chavs out of there like a ferret after a rabbit. Or a mongoose after a snake. Or some other animal combination. It was awesome.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-08 20:11:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I never rated this. Huh.
A fine post to use my 9000th review on.
I am officially a loser.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-08-08 15:07:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm finally starting to understand what the hell a chav is. Thanks.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-08 11:49:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by bigbabylons (user info) at 2007-08-08 15:09:20 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Scottish = Ginger
--------
Stereotyping = idiotic
Submitted by bigbabylons (user info) at 2007-08-08 10:09:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Scottish = Ginger
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-08 04:51:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2007-08-08 05:11:52 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I was confused until I realized you are one of those Englanders.
---------
Fuck off am I! Im fucking Scottish!
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2007-08-08 00:27:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2007-08-08 00:11:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I was confused until I realized you are one of those Englanders. Gets me every time.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2007-08-07 17:32:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2007-08-07 01:44:52 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
do they occupy a particular geographical location?
***
i LOVE IT WHEN sHANDY TRIES TO LEARN ABOUT NEW CULTURES.
Submitted by brokenlizard534 (user info) at 2007-08-07 15:29:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Just looking at this shit pisses me off
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2007-08-07 15:03:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gold
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2007-08-07 13:07:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...HAHAHAHAHA the tase of monkeys is sweet.
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2007-08-07 13:06:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AHAHAHAHAHA....
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2007-08-07 10:56:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:40:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
so charvaes = wigger?
-------------------------------------
My thoughts exactly.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-08-07 10:32:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
moyen
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2007-08-07 10:15:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know what any of these terms mean, but I'm sure if I lived in Scotland, or France, wherever the hell you're from, they would.
Cheers.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2007-08-07 07:34:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The Nova - is that sold under the Chavrolet moniker in Britland like it was in the US?
Submitted by Progr3ss (user info) at 2007-08-07 05:18:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh man this was so good...
Reminded me of the time a chav approached me and my brother at a tube station in '03 asking for a smoke, to which my brother replied "I don't smoke". He then punched my brother in the face. So my brother retaliated but missed with his fist and applied a stiff forearm to the chavs nose, breaking it. I laughed.
Great post.
Submitted by bigbabylons (user info) at 2007-08-07 04:59:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Everytime I see a chav I want to kick them in the head as hard as physically possible, is that wrong seeing as where I live this happens about every 200 yards?
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2007-08-07 03:22:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by AllyJeans (user info) at 2007-08-07 03:18:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-07 03:18:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
'kull fuck', hmm that's a new one............damn Insert key
'Skull Fuck'
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-07 03:17:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want to 'kull fuck'TheUniter
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-07 03:09:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-08-06 21:30:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think TheUniter is a 'she'.
----
i wanna fuck the uniter
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-07 03:08:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
our countries have so much in common
your names are funnier, though
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-08-07 03:01:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-06 22:53:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
1.5
~~~~~~~~
hahaha
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2007-08-07 02:44:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
do they occupy a particular geographical location?
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-08-07 00:52:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We have these in Georgia too. They mostly live in Elbert County, where they do meth and have lots of bastard babies. "Algae on the gene pool," as my dad calls them.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-06 22:53:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
1.5
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-08-06 22:24:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Same goes for that Zebra asshole.
Another chickenshit who doesn't have the spine to post, but will gladly drop his/her opinion on a post like a five ton turd.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-08-06 22:21:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Besides being some chikenshit alter without the cajones of a gnat, The Uniter needs to be dipped head first into a vat of battery acid. Slowly.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-08-06 21:40:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Of all the mutants, trolls, social deviants and square-headed crumple machines that infest uber like lice in an Albanian Shepard's crotch..."
That is a fantastic line, by the way.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 21:33:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Whatever, they're a fucking dink no matter what sex they are.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2007-08-06 21:31:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-08-06 21:30:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think TheUniter is a 'she'.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 21:29:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Of all the mutants, trolls, social deviants and square-headed crumple machines that infest uber like lice in an Albanian shepard's crotch I think I hate The Uniter the most, with his 0.5s and his 1.5s and his blank reviews. Gets right on my tits.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-06 21:02:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-08-06 20:47:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
brilliant
Submitted by Hooli (user info) at 2007-08-06 19:29:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm led to believe that the irish refer(ed) to their young lads and "Chavee's", and the term has progressed from there.
I was born in a town with a history of irish gypsy influence, and the term "chavee" or sometimes just "chav" is used in a friendly way to refer to young lads.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-08-06 18:48:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Originally from Ireland, it seems.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-08-06 18:46:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gilbert O'Sullivan is from Swindon.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-08-06 18:19:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
dis heres some fine fakin' work der bauy.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-08-06 18:17:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jesus, there were some real gems in here.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2007-08-06 18:09:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
what the hell is a chav?
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-08-06 18:06:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2007-08-06 16:42:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I fucking hate chavs.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Swindon
Shakespeare had it spot-fucking-on when it comes to my home town.
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2007-08-06 16:40:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ISN'T A FOR APOLLO?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-08-06 16:25:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
THE LIKELY CHAVS
Submitted by Bohme (user info) at 2007-08-06 15:15:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wish I hadn't read this.
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2007-08-06 14:56:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My daddy likes "Night Flight".
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 14:27:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-06 19:21:21 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
You couldn't sneak Shlongy in for the "S"???
---------------
Sorry Shlongy but the only things Chavs use golfclubs for is weapons in their low level gang fights
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-06 14:21:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You couldn't sneak Shlongy in for the "S"???
Submitted by candyfloss01 (user info) at 2007-08-06 14:09:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Good work however.. its virtually impossible for black people to be considered as 'chavs' unless your 'BRIAN' from BIG BROTHER.....
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:45:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2007-08-06 18:40:28 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
so charvaes = wigger?
-----------
Chavs are social scum who also happen to like rap music.
Charvae are the larvae of chavs
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:40:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
so charvaes = wigger?
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:24:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you just called me ghetto didn't you...
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:19:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Merlina-
BabyDaddy or Baby Daddy is an Ebonics word that (unfortunately) has made it into mainstream speech.
Ebonics is generally known as a style of speech and pronunciation usually attributed to Blacks, especially those involved in the "Gangsta" subculture.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/African_American_Vernacular_English
Some passionately defend the practice as part of the Black heritage and culture, sometimes with laughable defenses like proper English being a tool of oppression by Whitey.
It is a deplorable butchery of the English language, both British and American and I can't understand one damned word of it. I lop it in with wearing trousers 20 sizes too big, pulled down below your buttocks, and secured with a belt.
But, like with many other aspects of the so called ghetto and gangsta culture, some whites mimic it.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:00:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-08-06 12:50:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-08-06 12:23:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
jeremy kyle is awesome. way better than springer. i didn't get to see a "who my babydaddy" episode :(
~~~~~~~~~~
Actually what is all that about??
Is it me or is this whole "babydaddy" thing new?
if you reall yhave to say the same thing as everyone else at least be grammatically correct and say "my babies Daddy"
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keep it in context. the more grammatically incorrect you can get the better. that way they understand it when you talk about them.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-08-06 12:59:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-08-06 12:56:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Look at the C1ndy post entitled "Wedding"
That is where I learned about chavdom.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-08-06 12:50:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-08-06 12:23:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
jeremy kyle is awesome. way better than springer. i didn't get to see a "who my babydaddy" episode :(
~~~~~~~~~~
Actually what is all that about??
Is it me or is this whole "babydaddy" thing new?
if you reall yhave to say the same thing as everyone else at least be grammatically correct and say "my babies Daddy"
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-08-06 12:37:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha chav.
Submitted by Flack (user info) at 2007-08-06 12:36:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Most Americans are probably going "who the fuck is Vicky Pollard?" But I know who she is. If there is one good thing I've discovered in Afghanistan, its bootleg copies of "Little Britain" which is the funniest show ever, ever!
So +2 for that.
ASBO- Anti-social Behavior Order. While it seems like it is common practice in the UK, it seems like an ASBO is just a form of fascism.
So another +2 for giving me another reason to tell the Limeys I work with why Britain isn't as fucking awesome as they go on about.
I'm guessing a Chav is what we in the states refer to as a "whigger." Am I correct in this assumption?
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-08-06 12:26:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes all over.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-08-06 12:23:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
do i look bovered?
jeremy kyle is awesome. way better than springer. i didn't get to see a "who my babydaddy" episode :(
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2007-08-06 11:49:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have no idea what any of this means.
What's an ABSO?
Submitted by Sinistral (user info) at 2007-08-06 11:45:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I got enough of this to warrant a +2.
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-08-06 11:44:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Interresting that Asbo thing...
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2007-08-06 11:32:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 10:42:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
There are some weird ones on the Wiki ASBO site.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asbo
---------------------------
"Two teenage boys from east Manchester forbidden to wear one golf glove."
Ahahahahaha!!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-06 11:24:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Only Maury Povich tells daddies they are daddies.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-08-06 11:07:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've watched like six episodes of Coupling, and I understood almost a quarter of this.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 10:42:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-08-06 15:28:08 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm back, Googling finished.
The whole ASBO thing is interesting and I want to read more about it. Tell me, are the courts alone responsible for issuing one of those as a response to a criminal act, or does the offender actually have what is known as Antisocial Personality Disorder?
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Teh courts in response to a minor act, normally of persistant public nuiscance but also for petty theft and the like. If issued they prevent the offender from performing certain acts ie Walking down certain streets, talking to specific people etc depending upon what exactly they had been given the ASBO for. If they break these conditions then they can be charged again.
There are some weird ones on the Wiki ASBO site.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asbo
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-08-06 10:28:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm back, Googling finished.
The whole ASBO thing is interesting and I want to read more about it. Tell me, are the courts alone responsible for issuing one of those as a response to a criminal act, or does the offender actually have what is known as Antisocial Personality Disorder?
Submitted by zwerg (user info) at 2007-08-06 10:00:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:53:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I understand about 40% of this.
The Burberry thing always surprises me, I don't know it to be associated with WT here. Middle class women seem to enjoy it too. I don't see the fascination, though.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:36:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Respec
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:23:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:20:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:52:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know what a few of these things are, but it was funny anyway. For us, though, the guy doing the paternity tests is Maury Povich.
Maury: Dayshawn...you are NOT the father.
Dayshawn: [jumps around making hand gestures] WERD NIGGA, I TOL YOU! I TOL YOU! SHE A HO!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
AHAHAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:20:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Looks like I'll be googling some terminology.
And I suppose we (i.e. 'Merica) is responsible for this.
Someone needs to do a scholarly comparison of your Chavs and our White Trash/Rednecks.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:13:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-08-06 14:03:46 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 14:02:13 BST (#) Ranking: 0
You should hear about the time I walked down the road shouting 'im the king of the world' with my pants round my ankles. hehe
==========
I'd rather not. But honestly, one glance at your genitals would have exposed you as the king of fuck all.
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My friends girlfriend was helping me long and i got her in a headlock whilst rubbig her hair, unfortunatly I wasn't walking straight and ended up walking into a little wall where she bust her nose open.
Oh the joy!!
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:05:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Creep, you spelled his name wrong. It's D'aishawnne
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:03:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 14:02:13 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
You should hear about the time I walked down the road shouting 'im the king of the world' with my pants round my ankles. hehe
==========
I'd rather not. But honestly, one glance at your genitals would have exposed you as the king of fuck all.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:03:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 Maury. I fucking LOVE Maury Povich.
Submitted by mynameisandy (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:02:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Superb!
Spot on.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:02:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:51:09 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:48:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have 'known' one chav girl, who I shared my bed with.........
.........she pissed my bed.
_______________________________
Oooh, I bet their nasty lil' slutbags.
And you don't have to lie, EI... she gave you a glorious Golden Shower.
-------------------------------
I was offered a golden shower once but I said Id rather she pissed in the toilet, than over me.
You should hear about the time I walked down the road shouting 'im the king of the world' with my pants round my ankles. hehe
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 09:00:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:52:11 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know what a few of these things are, but it was funny anyway. For us, though, the guy doing the paternity tests is Maury Povich.
Maury: Dayshawn...you are NOT the father.
Dayshawn: [jumps around making hand gestures] WERD NIGGA, I TOL YOU! I TOL YOU! SHE A HO!!!
-----------------
Thats exactly what Jeremy Kyle is like except the guys name us usually Kevin.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:52:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know what a few of these things are, but it was funny anyway. For us, though, the guy doing the paternity tests is Maury Povich.
Maury: Dayshawn...you are NOT the father.
Dayshawn: [jumps around making hand gestures] WERD NIGGA, I TOL YOU! I TOL YOU! SHE A HO!!!
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:51:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:48:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have 'known' one chav girl, who I shared my bed with.........
.........she pissed my bed.
_______________________________
Oooh, I bet their nasty lil' slutbags.
And you don't have to lie, EI... she gave you a glorious Golden Shower.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:48:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have 'known' one chav girl, who I shared my bed with.........
.........she pissed my bed.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:48:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:43:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by particle_man58 (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:39:38 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok I don't know what some of that shit is.
What the fuck is ASBO? And what the hell is a Quimm?
------------------
ASBO: Anti-Social Behaviour Order. Scumbags collect these like trading cards.
Quimm: Pussy
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You spelled it wrong
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quim_%28slang%29
Submitted by particle_man58 (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:47:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:43:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ASBO: Anti-Social Behaviour Order. Scumbags collect these like trading cards.
Quimm: Pussy
------------
Anti-Social Behaviour Order? That sounds awesome, is it like a parking ticket you get for being an asshole or something?
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:46:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHA
Brilliant.
Thank FUCK I live in an area where there are no chavs. They're mostly in parts of South East London I think.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:43:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by particle_man58 (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:39:38 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok I don't know what some of that shit is.
What the fuck is ASBO? And what the hell is a Quimm?
------------------
ASBO: Anti-Social Behaviour Order. Scumbags collect these like trading cards.
Quimm: Pussy
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:42:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by particle_man58 (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:39:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok I don't know what some of that shit is.
What the fuck is ASBO? And what the hell is a Quimm?
____________________________
QUIMM, QUIMM, QUIMM!!!
Submitted by particle_man58 (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:39:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok I don't know what some of that shit is.
What the fuck is ASBO? And what the hell is a Quimm?
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:37:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent. Pikeys are a constant source of amusement for me, although I do have a Burberry trench for the office and I grew up drinking White Lightning. Fuck, the evidence is all there...
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:35:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Made it worse that there were six 18/19 year old girls chatting about sex at the back of the bus and where they had performed certain lewd acts and want to get it oooooonnnnnnnnnnnnn in future, turn ons etc etc
I couldnt manage to get excited on the bus and did not want them to see me in my horrific state,dribbling and sweating like a 80's boy band groupie. So I just masturbated when I got home instead :)
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:29:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Plus no one noticed the stench of vomit on the bus.
Maybe my vomit is odourless.
I'm pretty sure it was chicken wings related.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:28:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:27:29 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I vomited on the bus on Friday night.
On the way back from my friends house, I was feeling a little queezy. Ok I could barely open my eyes and was sweating like Linford Christies sandwiches. Luckily I had the towell for swimming upon my person and was quietly sick into it before wrapping it up and hiding it in my bag.
Once I was off I disposed of it into a bin and trotted to my front door.
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That's fucking disgusting mate. WELL DONE.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:27:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:23:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Frosty Jack? Like... ya mean Jack Daniels??? I'm not such a big fan of that stuff.
But ADDED TERRIBLE FLAVOUR - I might have to try...
===========
Hmmm. Thought you had good ol' Frosty over in the States. White Lightning is basically very strong (and highly carbonated) 'cider'. It's about 7% strong and when drunk in the preferred charver method (drinking it whilst spinning around in a circle) it fucks you up goodstyle.
Avoid unless you want a really cheap night vomiting.
___________________
Um, the only Cider drinks I know of here are, like, stuff such as Woodchuck and Hornsby's. It's Hard Apple Cider. I actually like that crap.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:27:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I vomited on the bus on Friday night.
On the way back from my friends house, I was feeling a little queezy. Ok I could barely open my eyes and was sweating like Linford Christies sandwiches. Luckily I had the towell for swimming upon my person and was quietly sick into it before wrapping it up and hiding it in my bag.
Once I was off I disposed of it into a bin and trotted to my front door.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:25:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:19:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:18:14 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, I smoke at LEAST 40 a day!!!
Could I be a mummy, all wrapped in cloth bandages and such???
----------------
requesting mummy horror story, stat.
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My latest piece is Sci-Fi, Mr. TTOM.
Being that I have -zero- knowledge of Teh Sciencez, I lucked out getting a tale set 5 billion years inna future.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:24:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 b/c I had my very 1st dream about zombies last night.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:23:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Frosty Jack? Like... ya mean Jack Daniels??? I'm not such a big fan of that stuff.
But ADDED TERRIBLE FLAVOUR - I might have to try...
===========
Hmmm. Thought you had good ol' Frosty over in the States. White Lightning is basically very strong (and highly carbonated) 'cider'. It's about 7% strong and when drunk in the preferred charver method (drinking it whilst spinning around in a circle) it fucks you up goodstyle.
Avoid unless you want a really cheap night vomiting.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:22:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's like £2 for a 2 litre bottle. Thats like a $1 for 2 full litres of piss water.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:21:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:18:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:18:14 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, I smoke at LEAST 40 a day!!!
Could I be a mummy, all wrapped in cloth bandages and such???
And what's that "White Lightning" like?
=======
Frosty Jack. With added terrible flavour.
__________________
Frosty Jack? Like... ya mean Jack Daniels??? I'm not such a big fan of that stuff.
But ADDED TERRIBLE FLAVOUR - I might have to try...
Submitted by Newty (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:20:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:18:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And what's that "White Lightning" like?
========
Piss in a can.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:19:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:18:14 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, I smoke at LEAST 40 a day!!!
Could I be a mummy, all wrapped in cloth bandages and such???
----------------
requesting mummy horror story, stat.
----------------
And what's that "White Lightning" like?
-------------
Its booze and you get 50% free, that should tell you it's "quality"
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:18:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:18:14 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, I smoke at LEAST 40 a day!!!
Could I be a mummy, all wrapped in cloth bandages and such???
And what's that "White Lightning" like?
=======
Frosty Jack. With added terrible flavour.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:18:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Good old Jezza, uncovering the nation for the scum-hole it is.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:18:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, I smoke at LEAST 40 a day!!!
Could I be a mummy, all wrapped in cloth bandages and such???
And what's that "White Lightning" like?
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:17:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 13:16:16 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Buckfast or Burberry. Tough choice but I went for the more UK wide Chavism.
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A point well made. J nearly killed me as I'm watching that happen RIGHT FUCKING NOW.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:16:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Buckfast or Burberry. Tough choice but I went for the more UK wide Chavism.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-08-06 08:15:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not a single mention of Buckie? I'm disappointed sir, DISAPPOINTED.