things you're not allowed to do at school (266 hits)
Category: HumorRating: -1.55 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <evilgerbil666 (View user info) at 2007-08-12 15:49:47 EDT
okay, we all know those school rules, no chewing, no swearing, no leaving schol grounds during lesson time, no raping the new teaching assisstant, no one must enter the forbidden zone, ect... well, these are the rules they tell you, but unknown to you, there's this totally un-written law you must go by! so as if school wasn't as much hell as it is,(most lonely 30 odd year old reading this may have to think back to yur childhood days to remember this) they make it worse, by making you stick t rules you never knew existed! well, luckily i have managed to uncover most of these secret laws. it was very simple, you see there's this one kid in my class who's, well...a wanker, basically, and he does whatever he feels like, as wankers do. and thanks to him, a few other class retards and mis-fits, and a few of my guilable friends, i have manged to run a few tests, and found the rules you never knew existed-enjoy! (i swear, these have either been done by me, or i have witnessed them happening before me):
1.) no throwing books at pupils
2.) even if they are irish
3.) no throwing books at teachers
4.) even if they were "so totally asking for it"
5.) the proper way to enter the classroom is silently, not to walk through the door, saying "sup nigger?" to your teacher
6.) you must always follow the teacher's orders
7.) that includes sub teachers
8.) even if they "look like the man trying to rape me in my dreams last night"
9.) the calculators are for maths use only, not to spell out "boobies"
10.) no throwing calculators at pupils
11.) "in fact, no throwing anything at anyone unless it's P.E and you're being told to!"
12.) it is not polite to ask the teacher if it's their period
13.) nor is it polite to then to ask "so you're just an all time bitch then?"
14.) bribes cannot be taken by teachers
15.) you are not allowed to threaten your teachers with your "hordes of frosted scottish flying monkeys" if you are given a detention
16.) nor can you threaten to "pop a cap in your ass bitch!"
17.) when your name is caleld out in the register, you are to state if you are present, you may not yell out "what's up saggy tits?"
18.) when asked to come to see the teacher, you must walk up and sit down, not walk up and say "you can't prove that was my ass on the photo!"
19.) the smurfs did not cause the great fire of london
20.) the school staff are not being controlled by flesh eating gypsies from germany
21.) nazis are not your heroes
22.) on your test sheets, in the box that reads "do not write here" you are not allowed to put "well you just wrote that"
23.) when asked in a test "which of the following is the odd one out?" the correct answer will never be "the one that's wrong"
24.) teachr's edition books are not there because "all teachers deep down are retards"
25.) george bush is not in the boy's toilets offering towels
26.) when you are told "you are late", the incorrect response is "that's impossible, i'm a guy"
27.) michael jackson is not after your soul
28.) you may never on any circumstances offer the irish teachers "frosted lucky charms" for test answers.
29.) caleld welsh peopel "sheep bummers" is racism
30.) it is not okay to act racist towards welsh because "they're just welsh"
31.) your text books are not for making flip books
32.) nor can you use "text talk" in "text books"
33.) nor is it okay to send text messages if your phone is in the book because it's a "text book"
34.) "yes it is easy to understand"
35.) "spit it out"
36.) it is not okay to eat in class because you "bought it from the canteen so the money still goes to the school"
37.) the school does not give re-funds if you fidn the lessons "as fun as getting your balls nibbled by a rabid spider monkey while a dirty man puts fire crackers up your arse"
38.) the teacher does not want to hear what i did with a rubberband and a box of sharp rocks
39.) the toilets are not to be reffered to as "the shitter"
40.) if you throw something at a teacher just as the bell goes and you run home, it does not mean you won't be punished the next day
now enjoy a random picture:
User Reviews
Submitted by evilgerbil25666 (user info) at 2008-01-03 11:28:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
cool, you've almost got my name =D
Submitted by Mr_Burns (user info) at 2007-08-12 18:18:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by evilgerbil666 (user info) at 2007-08-12 17:44:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
note-everyone excuse beano-he's on his period bless him
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-08-12 17:31:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Hey, this kid is a proper retard.
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2007-08-12 17:13:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I hate to break a streak...
maybe some adaptive strategies are necessary.
Hi! welcome..
Submitted by Sinistral (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:48:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:37:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
bye bye
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:37:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Jesus Christ
Submitted by evilgerbil666 (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:29:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
thanks for all the great comments, fuckers!!!! :D
Submitted by evilgerbil666 (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:29:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
thanks for all the great comments!! :D
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:15:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:10:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Take that, authority figures!
I hope my comment on the other shitty list didn't aid you in deciding this alter's character.
P.S. are you going to go for a hat trick?
Submitted by RabiedRooster (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:09:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
CUNT
Submitted by Rejection (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:07:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Don't bother (-3)
Submitted by evilgerbil666 (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:04:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
er..sorry bout those few little typing problems, i kinda type really fast then when i read back i hardly notice
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:04:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-08-12 16:02:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment