I've never been closer to getting on a roof and taking people out. Fuck the USPS. (864 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.44 on 50 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (View user info) at 2007-08-22 08:37:58 EDT
March 19, 2007. Five months and three days.
That's how long it's been since USPS has utterly fucked my mail up. I've almost missed testing dates, have been charged fees by my bank for returned mail, and just generally have had a headache due to this.
I've filed two formal complaints with the main office in Baltimore, have spoken to the postmaster, in person, at my post office six times, have thrown myself in front of my mail carrier's truck, stopping her in the middle of her route, to plead with her to give me my mail, filled out countless forms to correct the situation which was the post office's fault, and I just got off the phone with the postmaster because I'm still not getting my mail.
Five months and three days.
I got a nice, shiney letter from my post master about a month ago saying everything had been fixed, that it was the post office's fault, and they 'sincerely apologize' for any grief this has cost me. Yeah, still no mail. My roommate gets her mail just fine though; just fine and dandy.
I wish Teephaphahhhahha was still around because I want to know if I have some legal options to pwn USPS. I'm so angry right now that my eye is twitching. I'm to the point where I'm either going to go cry in the corner, while rocking and mumbling about mail and USPS, or going all Charles Whitman on their ass.
I don't know where this is going, it's a piss poor rant, so have a picture. Everyone likes pictures.
*rocks and mumbles quietly*
User Reviews
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2007-08-24 15:46:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nah. I just knew that you're in the dirty dena.
21146 representing. And sounding like a pasty white dude. that's tan.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-24 07:57:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2007-08-23 14:13:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
21122?
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Oh God, am I not the only one in this zip who's having this problem? *weeps*
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-08-23 14:33:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
title indicates you are american
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2007-08-23 14:13:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
21122?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-08-23 09:00:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's a government agency----what did you expect?!
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-08-23 05:45:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:21:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Indo, I just stopped getting my mail one day. No one at the post office can figure out what happened.
They said that my name shows up as 'changed address with no forwarding', but they can't see who signed the change card in their fancy-shmancy new system. The postmaster said that it's the post office's fault for not verifying the identity of this mystery person and not fixing it the dozen or so times I've pleaded with them to fix it. He also said that if he has to start taking disciplinary action against the mail carrier, he will. Wtf, 'start'?! It's been FIVE FUCKING MONTHS.
P.O. Boxs cost money, which I don't have any extra of, and it's the principle - I deserve to get my mail. It's my right.
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It was me, I flew to the good ole US of A and did that just to fuck with your already altered mind.
Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2007-08-22 20:50:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My post lady has this thing about delivering all these stupid ads to my box, so I went down to fill out a form to have no ads delivered. It worked for 2 months. Then the ads started coming back again. Once again I went down to the post office and filled out the form. Good again for several months and then it started again...
Arghh.. I went down spoke to the post master and he assured me it would stop. Stopped for 3 weeks and started again. So at this point I was like screw it I will deal. Well that was the beginning of the end. Now she crams my mailbox full of ads and returns my mail. I have had my cable, phone and gas and electric turned off. I have had my bank cards returned so many times that they will no longer send anything to my house. I have to go and pick it up at my branch. I hate this lady she makes me nuts!
The last time she returned my mail, she left a yellow card in my box telling me that I was a repeat offender..... I would like to repeat offend her ass. Stupid bitch!
In other words, I completely relate!
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-08-22 20:19:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
lame story - awesome title.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-22 19:25:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've lived in my apartment for over 3 years, and twice last year, USPS started randomly returning my mail as undeliverable- including a wedding invitation and stuff from my job. They told me it was because the label (read: apt # painted in white out from last tenant) on my mailbox had worn away. Really? So no note or anything..they just fucking stopped delivering altogether? IT'S MADNESS.
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2007-08-22 16:18:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I feel your pain. I've been fucked by UPS dozens of times. They like to not ring my doorbell, hang up the notice that they "tried to contact me," and leave.
Then one time I changed the address to have one package delivered at work, and the UPS guy still brought the package with time-sensitive information to the wrong address (3 times he failed at delivering this sucker). The manager I spoke with on the phone said, direct quote, "We cannot control our drivers when they're out on the road delivering packages." This was in response to my question, "Why did your driver deliver my package to the wrong address after I had changed the delivery address from my home to my work?"
You'd think something like delivering mail would be rather easy. But no. Assfucks like USPS and UPS prove you wrong time after time.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2007-08-22 16:15:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2007-08-22 15:27:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what if I did it online or maybe slipped the guy behind the desk a Jackson?
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Last I checked you couldn't do it online. Giving the guy behind the desk would def work. Somebody pissed with her probably has a friend in the USPS.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-08-22 15:42:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
slip him the purple tongue, giraffe-girl
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2007-08-22 15:27:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what if I did it online or maybe slipped the guy behind the desk a Jackson?
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-08-22 14:21:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like that beer.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2007-08-22 12:56:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2007-08-22 12:30:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait a minute, do you mean that just anybody can change someone's forwarding address?
Oh what fun. I have to go now. I'd suddenly got things to do.
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You are supposed to show ID in person.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-08-22 12:44:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Postal Delivery Troubleshoot:
Sure it isn't being stolen?
Have you bribed your postal delivery person? (liquor or crack seems to be effective)
If yes, continue:
Have you been using your correct address on forms and correspondance?
If yes, continue:
Is your room-mate mad at you?
if yes- Are they tampering with or discarding your mail when you aren't around?
if no, continue:
Is your postal delivery person aware of your existance?
PO Boxes are cheap, unless you lose the key.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2007-08-22 12:30:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait a minute, do you mean that just anybody can change someone's forwarding address?
Oh what fun. I have to go now. I'd suddenly got things to do.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2007-08-22 12:26:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for a psychotic meltdown.
We submitted one of those handy forms to have the mail held while we were on vacation. Naturally the mail came every day while we were gone. That wouldn't have been so bad except that it gave Sam's mom yet another chance to tell me the fucking DEAL. I could not get her to stop telling me how we could have been broken into because "they" can see that no one is home and blah blah blah. God I hope they never find her body. I'd hate to have to explain all this to a grand jury.
Maybe you should get a PO box.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-08-22 12:24:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by NotSteve (user info) at 2007-08-22 12:23:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Going on month 2 at my new address and I still only get maybe one piece of forwarded mail a week. But i still get plenty of the former homeowner's mail. Feeling your pain.
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-08-22 11:47:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
USPS lost a box full of brand new books that somebody sent me for my berfday. The tracking number went to Tallahassee and then it just dropped off the face of the earth. Needless, to say they didn't do anything for me.
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2007-08-22 10:50:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:21:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Indo, I just stopped getting my mail one day. No one at the post office can figure out what happened.
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piss off an ex?
im keeping that in the old brain for future reference
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-22 10:49:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-22 10:48:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2007-08-22 10:44:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hope you plan on changing your name to Hilarity_Sues.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-08-22 10:41:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
they are bastards.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-08-22 10:26:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I shall use your story soon Hilarity rest assured I shall use it soon.
This sucks, but hey at least you still get your spam
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2007-08-22 10:20:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for the lolcats. I heart lolcats.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:49:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Soon the Summer Ale will be gone, and Octoberfest will once more rule the fridge.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:46:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Did you get that diamond thingimajig I sent you in the post?
Hope so, it cost me a squillion dollars.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:34:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, I realized that as soon as I pressed the 'rate' button with my response. NuurRRrr.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:32:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:21:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Indo, I just stopped getting my mail one day. No one at the post office can figure out what happened.
They said that my name shows up as 'changed address with no forwarding', but they can't see who signed the change card in their fancy-shmancy new system. The postmaster said that it's the post office's fault for not verifying the identity of this mystery person and not fixing it the dozen or so times I've pleaded with them to fix it. He also said that if he has to start taking disciplinary action against the mail carrier, he will. Wtf, 'start'?! It's been FIVE FUCKING MONTHS.
P.O. Boxs cost money, which I don't have any extra of, and it's the principle - I deserve to get my mail. It's my right.
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do you have the letter admitting it was their fault?
Take that to a lawyer, you win. End of story.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:32:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Well, you figure it out.
If this helps, I think I was about 6 when he went up on the roof.
Submitted by Flack (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:30:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Call your Congressman. It'll get fixed ricky-tick. Make sure you fax the office a copy of that letter you got from the Post Office, also.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:21:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Indo, I just stopped getting my mail one day. No one at the post office can figure out what happened.
They said that my name shows up as 'changed address with no forwarding', but they can't see who signed the change card in their fancy-shmancy new system. The postmaster said that it's the post office's fault for not verifying the identity of this mystery person and not fixing it the dozen or so times I've pleaded with them to fix it. He also said that if he has to start taking disciplinary action against the mail carrier, he will. Wtf, 'start'?! It's been FIVE FUCKING MONTHS.
P.O. Boxs cost money, which I don't have any extra of, and it's the principle - I deserve to get my mail. It's my right.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:14:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What happened?
Mail forwarding, moved locally, or similiar name as someone else close?
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:13:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You cant do anything else though......Unless you go meet your local government rep and tell her/him.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:09:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I will not get a P.O. box. I pay taxes and, therefore, am entitled to get my fucking mail free of charge. IT'S THE PRINCIPLE.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2007-08-22 09:06:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We filled out like 4 forwarding slips to get our mail delivered to our P.O. Box. None of them worked. Just get a P.O. Box, change your mailing address for all the businesses you use (banks, magazines, etc.) to the P.O. Box, and pick your mail up yourself every couple of days. They generally can't fuck it up if things don't leave the office.
Some of your utilities won't let you use a mailing address and will only send your bill to the address for which they provide the utility. Just pay those online.
P.S. If I ever get a picture of a lolcat when you could have just as easily used on of UR SEXEH BODEH, there will be CONSEQUENCES AND REPERCUSSIONS!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:49:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I, too, hate the USPS. Too many lost packages and inexcusably late letters for my business.
If you need something sent/delivered FAST, and can't do it electronically, I've found DHL to be incredibly reliable, and without the bullshit that the post office, UPS, or FedEx give you.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:49:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I knew someone who burnt down a superstore and then pretended to be a hero by rescuing people unfortunatly he left a firefighter to die. I didn't like him or speak to him, he may of been a little crazy.
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:47:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Postal wahhh, but you're hot so let's join in consensual statutory.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:45:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Knowuhchooneed? A vacation.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:45:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shlong, either that is a lie or the most interesting thing ever. I've never known, e-known or otherwise, someone who knew a mass killer.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:43:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
How could I miss the reference? I used to drink with Charley.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:42:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bless Shlongy for getting an obscure 1960's mass murderer reference. That made me happy.
Submitted by Prime36L (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:41:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Clearly a case of not enough lesbian love-making with the mail carrier.
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:40:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
and so did the kitty
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:40:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
sorry but your plight made me smile.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-22 08:39:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Befoe you go to this extreme, let's enjoy coital non-interruptus just once.