UGR--Bleached White (Action/Adventure) (686 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.21 on 45 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by lessthanthree (View user info) at 2007-08-23 10:07:46 EDT
The cogs turned, chewing up vital wires to the center of his CPU, clawing at the next tooth to rotate through in a mechanical precision. The solenoids were at full capacity, sending the hydraulic cylinders into overdrive and testing the very limits of the steel walls and rubber gaskets. Like a set of nails on a chalkboard, the noise was a crunching absurdity that turned everyone's stomach, leaving them with their spine tingling and hair raised.
Sunflower v.3.214 had just vandalized another jewelry store. It was his fourth this month - not to mention the seven banks, two machine shop, and several other haberdashery type stores, which really threw the investigators for a loop. Why would a 40 foot robot need ties, pants, and dress shirts? Certainly they didn't fit him.
The only lead that the investigation team had was a series of closed circuit TV recordings from surveillance cameras at the local crime scenes. Sure, the banks had cameras that were trained to monitor the vault, floor, and tellers, but when a robot the size of a building rips the roof off and breaks the vault door like Hercules snapping a toothpick, what could be done? The video recordings contained footage of air hissing out of steel braided hoses and sprockets winding with a constant buzzing sound. Many questions remained.
What was the driving force?
Who operated the rig?
Why?
Before they'd get another lead, the investigators would get another call. The giant robot with L.A.S.E.R. eyes would burn it's way into another facility, stealing hundreds of gallons of oil, hydraulic fluid all presumably to maintain itself. The black, molybdenum coated machine ripped through many of stores, so how could they not find him?
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Sunflower, v.3.214 had been built with a HumanoSynch human recognition and synthesizer software designed to mimic the actions, emotions, and behavior of humans. The robot learned from his own movements, constantly perfecting it's walking, talking and thinking. Each time, he saved the information in the 30 blade server such that he became more agile, 'brighter', better at balancing, learning to run, jump, outmaneuver, out-think, and outclass humans in every way.
Michael, the robot's creator, let his team of scientists know what he wanted. He had the robot built to serve his devious purposes, perhaps to spend some money or perhaps because he was just so egotistically overblown that he didn't know what else to do. After the molybdenum coating was put on, the robot took on another personality entirely.
"This is bad," said the Sunflower as he flexed his gyroscopic arms, clearly picking up on the slang he heard from one of the crew members.
"Yes, Sunflower, are you lubed?" questioned and replied the technician, who was going through the final checklist.
"Yeah, yo!" came an unexpected retort from the voice synthesizer.
"How about cylinders, hydraulic levels are full?" The technician barely got the question out through all the chuckles.
"Yeah, nigga."
This time laughter erupted through the whole team. Eventually the noise was stymied and they could return to the checklist.
"Is your photon separation unit contained, Sunflower?"
"Cot damn right, motha fucker."
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After he was released, Sunflower took to the dessert, roaming about whilst shooting laser shows out of it's eyes, learning to walk, talk, perform motor functions and the like. It was like watching a little baby grow, Michael thought. Sunflower would fall down only to get back up and state what needed lubing or tuning and eventually he took to repairing himself. The development was monumental. A self-healing EMT who could take care of himself was not a small feat, after all.
Those were the best days of Michaels life, up until Sunflower took off without any warning. They were in the desert doing field tests and everything passed with flying colors, when out of no where the robot took off into a full on sprint. Before the operators could hit the remote operated e-stop, the mechanical beast leapt through air and snatched the transponder from off of it. That was the last time Michael saw his beloved creation.
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Another bank and this time and interesting development. Sunflower had broken into a bleach manufacturing site and was soaking in a 14,000 gallon, 50% caustic soda solution pool for hours. It was a holiday weekend and no employees were to be found. Typically, the investigators were able to later find out, the solution is diluted with water to about 25% where the reaction is in the form of heat energy. This solution when mixed with chlorine forms sodium hypochlorite. Several condensing and cooling processes take place before a 5.25% sodium hypochlorite bleach is bottled and shipped to millions of households.
The molybdenum coating on Sunflower had started to react, not stripping the metal in it's entirety but leaving the robot with a sludge-like layer. About 10 hours later, he got out and soaked in the chlorine pool, converting his once jet black outer coating into a ecru, beige type of color. Eventually, he made his final destination the sodium hypochlorite pool where his outer layer became a cloud white.
Investigators were clueless as to the new development. Whispers stormed rampantly throughout the police department. Up until now, the character of the robot had been a pretty obvious affair. It targeted machine shops and lubricant/petroleum depots in order to sustain automatic life, jewelry stores, banks, and such for monetary purposes.
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Robbery cases from the robot had ran completely dry, but that didn't mean he was out of the public eye. A more serious call came when a lady, Mrs. Hammel of Reno, Nevada had her 5 year old son snatched from her by a "giant, laser eyed robot."
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Shamone!
User Reviews
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-24 20:48:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Boy story.
Shamone.
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2007-08-24 09:30:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
didn't read it.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-08-24 09:08:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-24 07:49:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-08-23 21:46:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 21:18:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Let's fuck. I'm drunk, not complaining. I understand uber quite well. I'm not who you think I am.
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Sir, this indecent proposal does not become you. Also it is quite ominous. And how do you know I'm not a dude?
==========
I was kinda hoping you were a dude L:)
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Sorry to disappoint!
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-24 08:48:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
""I was making a joking play on the stereotypical black man by him robbing things. The robot then bleached his molybdenum outer layer (much like Michael Jackson "shamone") and became a child toucher. This was a double-entendre spoof.
Also, Michael Jackson, the namesake in this piece, on his latest quest to become the world's biggest Wacko has announced plans that he is planning on building a 40 Ft. Robot that shoots lasers out of it's eyes, and looks like him to roam the dessert.
Basically, if you don't know about Michael Jackson and his shenanigans, this wouldn't make too much sense. The whole denouement is that the robot took on the creepy characteristics of Michael whence upon it changed from black to white. But hey, "It doesn't matter if you're black or white." ""
_____________________________________
Um, Okaaaaaay...
See, I didn't know any of that roboty nonsense. It seemed to me that the MJ stuff just got tacked on at the end. Upon further review, I can see that this is more comprehensive, however, as a stand alone piece of fiction, you're asking a lot from the average reader. Perhaps if you had simply placed a link at the top to the story about MJ's robot madness. I dunno. At some points it seemed overly technical as well, but the robot speaking "Ghetto" was pretty fuckin' funny.
Submitted by NapalmFace (user info) at 2007-08-24 07:32:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-08-23 20:21:15 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 15:08:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-08-23 15:07:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Napalm and Azure, new rouges of Uber
---
And why am I make-up?
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you're not im an illiterate moron, I meant rogue's
please excuse my douchebagginess, douchebag.
__________________
Rogue? I'll take that, although it bother's me that I'm being associated with a Cardboard Cutout Emo poof with more hair than sense.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-08-23 21:46:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 21:18:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Let's fuck. I'm drunk, not complaining. I understand uber quite well. I'm not who you think I am.
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Sir, this indecent proposal does not become you. Also it is quite ominous. And how do you know I'm not a dude?
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-08-23 20:50:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Aww, it's okay, don't feel bad. Here's a drive-by +2 from a helpless puppet.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-23 19:29:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by lover101 (user info) at 2007-08-23 17:23:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i chuckled
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-08-23 16:44:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Prime36L (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:19:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by lessthanthree
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-08-23 15:21:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 15:08:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-08-23 15:07:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Napalm and Azure, new rouges of Uber
---
And why am I make-up?
-------------
you're not im an illiterate moron, I meant rogue's
please excuse my douchebagginess, douchebag.
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 15:08:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-08-23 15:07:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Napalm and Azure, new rouges of Uber
---
And why am I make-up?
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-08-23 15:07:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Napalm and Azure, new rouges of Uber
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-08-23 15:03:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
at least it didnt suck
Submitted by Prime36L (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:51:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I have no alters, I just felt the need to find a suitable target to ridicule when I arrived, and you were a top candidate. Congrats.
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:40:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by NapalmFace (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:38:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
it's cool, i'm happy to abuse you endlessly on this , my only account.
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bwahahaahahah, right, ONLY account. What a tool bag!
Submitted by NapalmFace (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:38:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
it's cool, i'm happy to abuse you endlessly on this , my only account.
i can't really see the point in wasting an alter on a 'tard like you.
Submitted by fidelcity (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:37:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
wrong dickhead!
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I bet you don't have any more...
dunn dunnnn dunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:35:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wow, I guess this is what everyone was talking about when they said "watch out for the alters."
Haha, nice job, same person.
Submitted by NapalmFace (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:29:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
as soon as i read up to 40 foot robot i gave up on this awful pile of depression.
-2die
Submitted by Prime36L (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:24:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Also, needs moar Shinebox
Submitted by Dr.Octagon (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:22:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Prime36L (user info) at 2007-08-23 13:19:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by lessthanthree
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2007-08-23 12:58:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Half the time this read like you were writing about things you had just read about, rather than things you know anything about.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-23 11:51:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Huh? What?
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 11:32:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not that I really care or thought I'd win, but for the record locksly/shinebox (same person) reviews are awesome.
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2007-08-23 11:08:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Poorly written, sentences tacked on together in a string of grammatical and literary errors.
An excellent example of the homosexual mind at work perhaps, but all in all utter crap.
Okay I didn't read it but I know its shit
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-08-23 11:05:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-08-23 11:04:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
on further review, ill give you a 2 for doing research and not spewing crap.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-23 11:04:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 11:04:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:56:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Robbery cases from the robot had ran completely dry, but that didn't mean he was out of the public eye. A more serious call came when a lady, Mrs. Hammel of Reno, Nevada had her 5 year old son snatched from her by a "giant, laser eyed robot."
---------
Shamone!
______
Felt like a cop out.
Why was the robot stealing stuff? Where did the robot go? Why did the robot take a child?
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I was making a joking play on the stereotypical black man by him robbing things. The robot then bleached his molybdenum outer layer (much like Michael Jackson "shamone") and became a child toucher. This was a double-entendre spoof.
Also, Michael Jackson, the namesake in this piece, on his latest quest to become the world's biggest Wacko has announced plans that he is planning on building a 40 Ft. Robot that shoots lasers out of it's eyes, and looks like him to roam the dessert.
Basically, if you don't know about Michael Jackson and his shenanigans, this wouldn't make too much sense. The whole denouement is that the robot took on the creepy characteristics of Michael whence upon it changed from black to white. But hey, "It doesn't matter if you're black or white."
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-08-23 11:03:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i would agree with fey actually, it seemed to come to an abrupt and sudden ending. don't get me wrong, i enjoyed it.
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:58:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I was busting your chops. Chill.
Thanks for the Wikipedia link, but if I need a refresher on solenoids, maybe I'll just refer to the first page of my Engineering textbook.
Submitted by shinebox (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:58:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
U AN ILTTERATE FAG
Y A CUNT YA
SHINE FUCKING
BOXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:56:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Robbery cases from the robot had ran completely dry, but that didn't mean he was out of the public eye. A more serious call came when a lady, Mrs. Hammel of Reno, Nevada had her 5 year old son snatched from her by a "giant, laser eyed robot."
---------
Shamone!
______
Felt like a cop out.
Why was the robot stealing stuff? Where did the robot go? Why did the robot take a child?
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:55:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sunny, while I appreciate your enthusiasm in correcting me and the terms used in my UGR entry, allow me to point out that solenoids aren't necessarily valves. I've done a fair amount of mechanical research for this entry. Allow me to show you this link http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solenoid
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:52:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
it's a solenoid VALVE moron. way to not post total crap for once.
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:49:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fey, the story is finished. Is there something that I can help clarify?
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:47:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Heh.
(Tip; Finish the story before posting it.)
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:47:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It dyed its hair?
Submitted by orph (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:46:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not bad, a jolly little jaunt.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:39:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:33:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
silly
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-23 10:22:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well someone better rate this!