Why do guys do that humping motion behind a girl whenever she is bending over to pick something up..... (2371 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.32 on 61 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by I_can_get_you_a_toe (View user info) at 2007-08-27 17:39:53 EDT
I used to hang out with this girl, where every weekend she would get off her face drunk - not just 'I love you man' drunk - but, 'passed out in a pile of puke, waking up with no pants on' drunk. She was a lot of fun.
We ended up losing touch for awhile, until she sent me an email recently asking if I wanted to come round and visit. Of course I did - I missed my booze hag.
I spent the rest of the week preparing myself physically and mentally for the debauchery that would ensue.
Saturday rolls round, I was doing some pre-drinking drinking, so by the time I turn up at her place my voice had become stuck on one volume...Loud.
I ended up waking up her baby. My friend looked at me like I had just made fun of her mum's cancer.
I didn't stay long (well, just long enough to give the baby a good healthy shake) I was too creeped out by the whole thing. This girl was two years younger than me - how could she have a baby!
I mulled over this for quite awhile and came to a decision - from now on I would only hang out with people of the pro-choice persuasion.
It also got me thinking about a 21st party that was held at my house a couple weeks ago and the people that came - who were all around the same age as her.
They were running around pilled off their heads, puking in bushes, having girl-fights about some guy named Jason and dancing badly to house music. And I was right there with them.
Yugh, had I become the 'aging hipster' who still acts like she's 'with it'? what's the cut off age do you think, what age do you turn when it's no longer acceptable to sleep in a single bed with 4 other people, or to announce to the room 20,000 times that you're drunk?
What's the age you go from being fun-loving and carefree - to the sad old women at the pub trying it on with guys half her age?
On a completely unrelated note, I found this funny;
GIRL: I have done a great sin. I called my boyfriend a BASTARD.
PSYCHIATRIST: Well now, that's not a nice thing to call anyone, so >> what did he do to deserve that?
GIRL: Well, he kissed me.
PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (kisses her)
GIRL: .. Yes!
PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a BASTARD.
GIRL: But, he put his hand in my top.
PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (puts his hand in her top)
GIRL: Yes!
PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a BASTARD.
GIRL: But, he took my clothes off.
PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (takes off her clothes)
GIRL: Yes!
PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a BASTARD.
GIRL: But, he had sex with me!
PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (has sex with her)
GIRL: .Yes!
PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a BASTARD.
GIRL: But, he told me he has AIDS.
PSYCHIATRIST: BASTARD!!!!!
User Reviews
Submitted by The.Masked.Assailant (user info) at 2007-12-05 14:12:17 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
i only do the humping motion behind a girl when she is bent over WHEN her pants are down and my dick is out. in case you're old enough to know, it's called "fucking from behind."
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-11-05 19:52:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-11-05 19:12:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You want me.
Submitted by ArnieGeddon (user info) at 2007-11-05 19:02:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://english.aljazeera.net/NR/exeres/F93C150C-1446-492B-93B8-D930C6EE8412.htm
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2007-11-05 09:22:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
RETALITORY -2 WOOOO!!
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-11 23:21:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:41:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
By the way, remember the discussion we had months ago about the All Blacks choking?
Shame, for shame....
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I prefer to ignore all earlier comments i made in regards to the all blacks winning the world cup. thank you very much.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-10-11 23:02:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I didn't do anything to circe, she's just rude. I think she caught dutch. Anyway you can't get into pubs over here if you're under five foot one, I guess that rules you out valerie brandybuck.
Now, I have to do some work. leave me alone.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:59:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this shows up on most recently reviewed as "why do guys do that humpin" and that amuses me.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:52:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-12 12:18:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
do you live in brisbane stagger? (I should start calling it 'briiiizzzeeee')
mini golf is for twelve year olds. and retards. and downies.
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and DRUNKS
I live in Sydney.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:50:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Um, I just invited MYSELF, obviously. What did you do to Circe? I'll cut you, I swear.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:46:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Can I get sucked off right now?
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:46:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:38:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...And risk breaking one of your ancient, brittle bones? Never.
OK, two of my favorite Aussies in the same room + drinks sounds like a damn good time. Promise to bring me Circe and I'm on a plane.
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ermm...valerie? you're not actually invited.
Besides, circe and I aren't talking.
i <3 canada
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:41:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I got a chuckle out of this...you're never too old to get drunk. Take it from me, I'm nearly 20!
By the way, remember the discussion we had months ago about the All Blacks choking?
Shame, for shame....
And yes, I'm aware Canada didn't win a game....I hate you and that handsome Dan Carter. Or as you Kiwis call him, Dan Caataaaah
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:38:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...And risk breaking one of your ancient, brittle bones? Never.
OK, two of my favorite Aussies in the same room + drinks sounds like a damn good time. Promise to bring me Circe and I'm on a plane.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:26:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
if you're not a homo stagger you can come too. I thought you live in sydney.
Valerie?
bite me.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:25:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:20:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, HANDS OFF, SISTER.
(Danger_Ranger doesn't like girls.)
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ROFL I KNEW THAT SILLY!! HE'S AUSTRALIAN!!
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:20:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, HANDS OFF, SISTER.
(Danger_Ranger doesn't like girls.)
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:18:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
do you live in brisbane stagger? (I should start calling it 'briiiizzzeeee')
mini golf is for twelve year olds. and retards. and downies.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:18:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The hands to yourself bit is very important, you're from new zealand.
okay, all future correspondence will be made via email. wolfgangbreihtenreiter.at.hotmail.com
correspondence means contacting somebody.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:16:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well fuck the pair of you, I like mini-golf.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-11 22:04:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meet up with THE Danger_Ranger? could it be true?
woooo!
sounds cool though, but i can make no promises re: the molestering.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-10-11 21:55:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i see. Well, if you want to hook up, like have a brisbane ubercon without those homo's thorpe and williamson, let me know. I have to warn you though, I am even more handsome in real life.
I'm serious.
You would need to keep your hands to yourself.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-11 21:50:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
November - while brisbane does have the unfortunate circumstance of being occupied by aussies - it also has wicked awesome weather. I hate rain.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2007-10-11 21:37:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Brisbane's the shit if you like mini-golf.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-10-11 21:30:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
we'll still know you're a kiwi by your moustache.
when are you coming?
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-11 21:19:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i've already started preparing myself by training my voice to pitch two octaves higher and adding a whiney squeak on the vowels.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-11 21:14:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-10-11 21:00:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*drums fingers....*
you know '07's almost over, right?
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no!!??
it's a 'trip' which generally lasts anywhere from 5 days to 3 weeks.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-10-11 21:00:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*drums fingers....*
you know '07's almost over, right?
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-11 20:40:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hells yea
Brisbane trip '07 woooo!
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-10-11 18:34:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you're coming to brisbane?
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2007-09-28 20:39:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-09-13 10:22:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
are you a guy or a girl?
this is confusing
-
You bring the same questions to mind.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2007-09-28 20:31:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-09-28 19:46:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 I'm drinking kiwi beer.
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-09-16 12:55:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Can we just fuck and get it over with?
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-09-13 10:54:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for the title alone. I agree, what is up with that?
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-09-13 10:32:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I dont think we should ever stop having fun. 23 is definately too young to be 'The Adult' one at parties I know that much.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-09-13 10:30:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
at thirty I tend to be the older guy in my group of friends but it works out.... I'm a responsible dad/parent type until my boy is at his mom's then I am my ever young self. he gets to see some of that but not nearly all of it.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-09-13 10:22:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
are you a guy or a girl?
this is confusing
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-09-13 10:08:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The whole pregnant thing. Maybe you weren't serious? Just thought I'd show some solidarity. =)
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-09-12 08:29:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Are you ok?
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2007-08-31 14:16:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-08-28 09:03:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Why do you give a fuck what other people think?
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generally, no. but then anyone that says 'I don't give shit about what anyone else thinks' is lying.
I am 23 and let a 17 yr old sleep in my bed with me.....sleep as in REM sleep, innocent as it was - i needed to explain and justify to my flatmates the next day - i didn't want them to think i was a pedo.
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That's not too too bad. I wouldn't go with that big of a gap, but in a world of double standards you get a bit more leeway being older if you're the girl.
Still, you only need to worry about your actions if they are, in fact, inappropriate. Hit the club all you want. If you feel good and you're having fun, it doesn't really matter. At 23, you're still far too young to have to worry about this kind of thing anyway, but if you notice the crowd is much younger than you there are other places to hit. That kind of thing makes for better conversation anyway. I'm 27 and yes, I've seen some 18 year old college freshman I would love to do naughty naughty things to, but most 18 year old arm candy honeys have absolutely fuckall to talk about. It can get old very quick.
Actually, this is how I know I'm getting old. If a woman isn't even old enough to drink, I just can't find it in myself to be sexually attracted to her. It's like, "Hm. My niece is your age. I used to change her diapers. Ew. Game over."
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-08-29 19:38:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
it's the macarena
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-08-28 09:03:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Why do you give a fuck what other people think?
---
generally, no. but then anyone that says 'I don't give shit about what anyone else thinks' is lying.
I am 23 and let a 17 yr old sleep in my bed with me.....sleep as in REM sleep, innocent as it was - i needed to explain and justify to my flatmates the next day - i didn't want them to think i was a pedo.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:56:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:15:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have never lusted after younger men.
Hang on , how old is Drogo?
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Why do you give a fuck what other people think?
Submitted by jigglypuff (user info) at 2007-08-28 06:54:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I like to go to bed earlier than midnight most days, but I can still do a weekend bender if needs must!!
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2007-08-28 03:55:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I used to hang out with this girl, where every weekend she would get off her face drunk - not just 'I love you man' drunk - but, 'passed out in a pile of puke, waking up with no pants on' drunk. She was a lot of fun.
------
And you wonder why she has a baby?
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2007-08-28 01:56:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-08-27 23:23:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The new sales associate I trained today is a 19-year-old Colombian/Oscar de la Hoya lookalike. It goes without saying that I spent the entire day engaged in mind-blowingly filthy fantasies and generally just not concentrating on my work at all.
So yeah, I really don't see anything wrong with an... ahem... "mature" lady lusting after younger dudes. It's a beautiful thing.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-27 20:44:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-27 19:57:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yugh, had I become the 'aging hipster' who still acts like she's 'with it'? what's the cut off age do you think, what age do you turn when it's no longer acceptable to sleep in a single bed with 4 other people, or to announce to the room 20,000 times that you're drunk?
===
I'm a 30-something hipster with an appetite for a college boy. I can behave myself in public without ultimately missing out on anything worth it. So my answer is "not yet."
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-08-27 18:57:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
10 years ago, the wife was amused when I did that. Now, not so much.
I'm not going to stop, though.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-08-27 18:24:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
humping motion = good times.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2007-08-27 18:19:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Yugh, had I become the 'aging hipster' who still acts like she's 'with it'? what's the cut off age do you think, what age do you turn when it's no longer acceptable to sleep in a single bed with 4 other people, or to announce to the room 20,000 times that you're drunk?
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15
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What's the age you go from being fun-loving and carefree - to the sad old women at the pub trying it on with guys half her age?
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28
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*wait, half of 28 is 14. ...calculates... ...carry the one... *
28 and 5/8 of your age.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-08-27 17:59:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-27 17:51:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The answer to your question is MEN LOVE DOG STYLE.
That reminds me of the tattoo I have across my stomach in tiny flowing script: "If you can read this, girl, it's time to take my wang out of your mouth and turn around."
==================================
holy fucking hell thats great
Orgasmatron, single handedly getting head from every chick on earth for 10 years going on strong.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-27 17:56:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Because I can.
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-08-27 17:52:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
el oh el!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-27 17:51:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The answer to your question is MEN LOVE DOG STYLE.
That reminds me of the tattoo I have across my stomach in tiny flowing script: "If you can read this, girl, it's time to take my wang out of your mouth and turn around."
Submitted by Prime36L (user info) at 2007-08-27 17:49:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good joke.
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-08-27 17:41:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That was funny.