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Little Sally has a Conversation with the Uniter (1173 hits)

Category: None

Rating: 0.68 on 53 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Little Sally (View user info) at 2007-08-28 07:29:51 EDT


FRANK AND CANDID UBER INTERVIEWS WITH SALLY WALKER

This episode: THE UNITER!


She finally reveals herself!

LITTTLE SALLY: So Uniter, I notice you give ratings to (almost) every post on Ubersite. In fact, sometimes I notice that you rate posts within five seconds of each other. Do you feel you give an honest evaluation to every post you rate even though I know for a fact you don't? Please speak freely.

THE UNITER: Who the fuck cares?

LITTLE SALLY: Well, Ms. Uniter, quite a few people. As it is, you have a tendency of pissing people off quite frequently. Do you read every post?

THE UNITER: Well, I, uh...

LITTLE SALLY: ANSWER THE MOTHER-FUCKING QUESTION!!!!!

THE UNITER: No! Little Sally, I can't possibly read every post!

LITTLE SALLY: And why is that, Miss Uniter?

THE UNITER: Well, as you have no doubt seen, I rate posts within seconds of each other sometimes. Even posts that actually require reading and comprehension.

LITTLE SALLY: And what do you do with those?

THE UNITER: I'm a really fast reader though!

LITTLE SALLY: ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!!

THE UNITER: No... no. I don't read every post. In fact, I don't read any posts.

LITTLE SALLY: You don't read any posts?

THE UNITER: No, I don't. Especially that fag Jack... I never read his posts, I just give them a -2 and dust off, saying something nice like

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-27 20:48:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

write a story for christ's sake you pathetic fuck


LITTLE SALLY: Well, that didn't sound like positive reinforcement to me!

THE UNITER: No, I'm not here for any constructive reason, Sally. I'm here to snipe, make others feel my "coolness" with my blank comment ratings, and be hateful to people over the internet who I shall never encounter.

LITTLE SALLY: Wow, what a brave and noble task you lay out for yourself!

THE UNITER: I do what I can.

LITTLE SALLY: So you, the Uniter, are actually Jack Mccallum?

UNITER: No, at least I don't think so...

LITTLE SALLY: Well then, how do you think that makes Jack feel when you say things like.... "Why don't you claim it was horse87? At least that would be funny, and it would explain how your 'horseguest' knew about your bantering relationship to that other old fuck who loves ubersite like 10 minute hard-on, Shlongy." I for one know that it would not make ME feel good about myself.

UNITER: Well, I don't really give a hoop'n'shnagel, 'cause nobody knows who I am anyway.

LITTLE SALLY: Does it bother you at least a tiny bit that you have absolutely no honor or character whatsover?

UNITER: I like the pictures!!!!!

LITTLE SALLY: So why do you stay on?

THE UNITER: Because my only friend, ubersite itself, was something I couldn't give up in a million years... because I am a pathetic fuck... and that is the humor of it!

LITLLE SALLY: Thank you for being so candid, you slore!

This has been the first and probably the last installment of candid Uber interviews with Sally Walker.


spineless.jpg (32 kB)

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User Reviews


Submitted by tHEbiGNOthINg (user info) at 2009-01-10 18:17:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

hey Sally, thanx for reviewing my first post!!! I didnt even read this, but I wanted to say hi!!!

Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-05-08 17:00:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

the uniter is jonny X.






What phone do you have Jonny?

Submitted by Acarnis (user info) at 2008-05-08 16:26:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

I thought TheUniter was a virus

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2008-05-01 02:04:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

fuck-eee-you-k00, haiku-mikooo

Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-04-18 18:01:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

No Comment

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-30 20:09:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

really? that's actually surprising.

/bitching

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-30 11:02:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

How theuniter has rated other users

beeltea (user info) 1 on 22 = 0.05

I hardly think slightly above "worth reading" is so terrible.

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-30 06:48:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

nah, just all of my posts

Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2007-08-30 03:44:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

The uniter doesn't rate everything negatively.

Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-08-29 19:56:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

f.y.i., TheUniter = Capn Thorns and Apollo.

Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-29 14:33:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

i like turtles

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-29 14:00:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

you aren't

Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-08-29 02:01:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

Wait, I thought I wasn't even considered much more than an alter myself?

Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-08-29 00:59:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

Jester_and_Traxx = zegladancer...or whatever the fuck

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-29 00:14:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Little Sally drinks too much and has anger management issues

Submitted by Jester_and_Traxx (user info) at 2007-08-28 23:57:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

JESTER: I really don't like "TheUniter" accounts who just leave negative feedback for everything. Sort of defeats the whole purpose of having a ranking system for posts.


TRAXX: W/E n00b maybe if ppl didn't post gay shit about how they r sick of Uber and how much it sux, he wouldn't pwn 'em.



JESTER: Yea he really "pwns" them by -2 ing everything dude.........


TRAXX: so wut do we rate this post? I say pwn this n00b too cuz his shit sux.


JESTER: I agree it wasn't all that entertaining, -2 is a bit extreme though. It was mildly amusing, just not gutbuster funny. -1?

TRAXX: Don't b a fag, this dude sux. Besides, he +2'd his own shit w/ his main accnt Beeltea. he deserves liek a bunch of -2s so it balances out.


JESTER: Good point, I'll go along with your -2 this time.

Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-08-28 23:16:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

So some alter gave you a bad rating, get the fuck over it

Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-08-28 19:39:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

what matt said

Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-08-28 17:27:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

oh dear god, it's a fucking rating..... on Ubersite.... which is on the internet.....



Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:58:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0


Not funny in the least. I don't think users like Uniter really matter, honestly. He doesn't leave comments normally, and doesn't contribute anything to the website in general. At least Maltese and Oathmeal SAID something that provided some sort of entertainment for the rest of us.

I can't say I hate or like Uniter. Even if he's an alter, alters themselves usually have some kind of character. Uniter doesn't.

Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:57:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2


I <3 TheUniter


Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2007-08-28 12:27:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

i guess im just not all that bothered by it

Submitted by lover101 (user info) at 2007-08-28 12:03:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1

Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-08-28 09:23:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

Who gives a shit? Why do people even care?


Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-28 11:14:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

-2 because of



Submitted by Little_Sally (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:01:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

who cares who she is... whatever "it" is it is a pussy

which makes it a she in my book

Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2007-08-28 10:34:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Little_Sally (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:01:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

who cares who she is... whatever "it" is it is a pussy

which makes it a she in my book

----------------


This was better than the post.

Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-08-28 09:59:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:09:32 BST (#)
Ranking: 0

I have said it before, but will explain again just for you, Little Sally, because you remind me of me when I was young and carefree and developmentally disabled.

I read the front page from bottom to top.

Then I go back and rate from top to bottom.

If I rate something, you can be sure I read it.
===
you care a lot

Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-08-28 09:32:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-08-28 09:23:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

Who gives a shit? Why do people even care?

Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-08-28 09:03:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2



Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-08-28 09:03:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1



Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:46:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

it did.

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:43:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Thanks, Sally!

You do the same.

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:42:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

well, fair enough i suppose. Have a nice day!

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:38:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

That's too much to ask, Little Sandwich.

I think a better solution would be:

You do what you want, and I'll do what I want.

You can be upset about my ratings if you want.

I will laugh about it if I want.

I may rate honestly, or I may not.

I may leave a comment, or I may not.

You can post about me, or not.

Impotence is bliss!


Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:32:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

just come clean sheila. It's very liberating.

Submitted by Little_Sally (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:28:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

No prob. Here's a way to not.


Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:16:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I hope I've not offended you TTOM.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:15:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

I think that should do it.

Precision counts on Ubersite!
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:14:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

there
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:14:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

okay, I think I've got the hang of this fucker
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:14:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Well done on reading this and coming to your conclusion in around 45 seconds

(little sally)
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:09:32 BST (#)
Ranking: 0

(me)
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:10:14 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:13:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1

Because my rating must be juuuuuuust right.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:13:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Is it going up or down?
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:12:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1

wait, I'm not sure of my math here

Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:27:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

This post actually wasn't that good. You could have done a lot more with this. +2 only because The Uniter is a salad tossing coward.

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:26:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

No, really.

Please, Little Sally, tell me how to beeeeeeeeeeeeee.



Submitted by Little_Sally (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:24:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Any feedback on my behaviour is welcome and effective.
---
Really? I doubt it.


Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:17:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Oh no, Im a hideous liar myself, its just that I dont act all fucking smug about it

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:16:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

obviously that was not directed at ttom. liar three below.

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:15:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

liar below.

Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:14:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:09:32 BST (#)
Ranking: 0

I have said it before, but will explain again just for you, Little Sally, because you remind me of me when I was young and carefree and developmentally disabled.

I read the front page from bottom to top.

Then I go back and rate from top to bottom.

If I rate something, you can be sure I read it.
------------
Lie

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:09:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

I have said it before, but will explain again just for you, Little Sally, because you remind me of me when I was young and carefree and developmentally disabled.

I read the front page from bottom to top.

Then I go back and rate from top to bottom.

If I rate something, you can be sure I read it.

Any feedback on my behaviour is welcome and effective, as are guesses as to my secret identity.


Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:08:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:57:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

The Uniter is a she?
----

Shlongy, c'mon... you gotta at least skim the post... don't be a Uniter.

Submitted by Little_Sally (user info) at 2007-08-28 08:01:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

who cares who she is... whatever "it" is it is a pussy

which makes it a she in my book

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:59:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Actually, I think Little Sally is a he, to add more confusion to this, and every other post.

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:58:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

you're going to have to ask little sally about that

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:57:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

The Uniter is a she?

Submitted by Little_Sally (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:56:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

we settled on a payment amount but then she backed out...

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:54:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Did you have to pay him for this interview like they do in "US Magazine" or did he do it free and clear?

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:34:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

fuckin' ace post little sally

Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-08-28 07:30:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

This post OOZES truth


Wait a minute, Marge. I saw "Mrs. Doubtfire." This is a man in drag!

-- Homer Simpson
Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala(annoyed grunt)ocious