UBER GO ROUND 2007 - Round 2 Matches and Tittles (2781 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.32 on 179 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Sacrilicious (View user info) at 2007-08-28 13:00:19 EDT
Welcome to Round 2 of Uber-Go-Round (U-G-R)©™.
Round one brought quite a variety of autisti...artistic expression, from short to epic, pictorial to poetry, comedy to creative fiction. It proved to us that sometimes, people don't care for being limited by genre. You spoke, Brdn_Nkd listened- and suggested he "ditch the whole genre thing," so that's what we're going to do.
Congratulations to kaos-king, who got the overall highest rating with his modern take on the mythological.
The First Round saw 9 forfeits (LAME), plus 2 withdrawals. In order to keep the numbers even, Round 2 has both Axolotl and Orgasmatron advancing as the highest rated winneringly-challenged from Round 1, and we can't forget Fey, who got the bye. Interestingly enough, beer-turtle managed a higher rating than his opponent with his forfeit post, but a forfeit in post form is still a forfeit, so azurefroz also advances to Round 2.
Brdn's words on ratings for the comp: First, I am not opposed to competitors rating each other's posts as long as it is done fairly and with good will. If you are going to rate your competition please , especially if you're going negative, take the time to explain your rating or else just wait until the round is over. Second, ratings will stand, if you have someone who hates you and they rate your post with 362 alters, well, that sucks but we're going straight up highest rating wins the round. In the event of tied ratings the post with the highest number of ratings will win. In the event that there should be another tie number of hits will be the tie breaker.
Due to the pairing delay and the holiday, ROUND 2 ENTRY DEADLINE is 11:59PM EST (not CST..CST is for hicks and Bart) TUESDAY, 9/4- as in one minute before midnight EST on Tuesday night. Voting will close on Thursday, 9/6 at midnight, with Round 3 match ups and titties posted Friday, 9/7. Subsequent rounds will be on the same Tues/Friday schedule.
Summary of rules:
1. Winner will be highest rated poster of each match up. Standard tie breakers apply.
2. A Free Life (or lives) will be awarded to the highest rated losers of round two, to keep pairs even, contingent upon the outcome.
3. All match ups will be randomly paired. Unlike Brdn, I don't wear shorts and I forgot my unders today, so I put all of your names in the Philadelphia-Phillies-Vanilla-with-Jimmies-Sundae-Mini-helmet.
4. All titties will be randomly selected and assigned. Titles too.
5. all rules are subject to change but rarely do (HA), having done this a few times now it seems as though things usually work pretty smoothly this way. If something is unclear please let me know.
6. forfeits suck. Please try not to do it.
Please be sure to include UGR in the title of your post and link it here to make it easier to locate. Your Round 2 pairings are:
Brdn_Nkd vs.DrogoRoch
Lips Like Morphine
Azurefroze vs.Susie_Derkins
Wednesday Went Wicked
Kaos-king vs.Orgasmatron
The Last Minutes of Sunshine
Sacrilicious vs.Captain Thorns
Doctored
DudeThatsBosh vs.Axolotl
Show Me Heaven
Inion_de_trua vs. Shlongy
The Fear of Fire
Kre8rix vs.DeadToast
Never Make a Promise
Jeanneee vs.Fey
In the Ashes of Our Century
Good luck and good writing.
User Reviews
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-07 08:50:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Some titles:
Living in Your Shadow
Armageddon
Light of Day
Holy See
Shenandoah
Southern Cross
When Pterodactyls Take Flight
I Now Pronounce You...
This Side Up
Binds of Faith and Sacrifice
That We Might Live
Appassionatta
Echos of a Tesseract
Ethnosphere
Breaking Out
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-09-07 05:18:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We would make great parents Drogo.
The likely lads plus child.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-09-07 05:02:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-09-07 04:39:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Condoms?
--
They are the things that hopefully stop you from getting teh Ghey Aids Em.
They also help stop irritating little baby accidents too, I know coat hangers are cheaper but apparently they are frowned upon.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-09-07 04:39:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Condoms?
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-09-07 04:21:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-07 00:36:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ATTN UGRererers (or anyone, really)- We need more titles before I post tomorrow. Sorry to be such a slackass, but I've been busy with real life.
--
Here are my offerings:
'If you touch it, he will come."
'She was breathing when I started' (trying that one again as it was callously ignored last time)
'The Fruit'
'Em & his amazing Technicoloured Condom'
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-07 00:36:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ATTN UGRererers (or anyone, really)- We need more titles before I post tomorrow. Sorry to be such a slackass, but I've been busy with real life.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-06 15:29:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
CT- Sorry- just caught your comments from before. Thanks for the kind words, and I wouldn't bet on anything yet, voting's still open. For the record, I prefer your entry to mine.
And I did just skim through these comments, but unfortunately I'm slammed preparing for a presentation today and I have plans tonight, so I'll take a look at it by morning and figure something out before I post hub tomorrow.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-06 12:12:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-09-06 11:43:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
um.... well...... you're running the show now which i appreciates very much but I think, when last i looked, ten people submitted this round which would give us five pairs which would then be cut to five people so you'd bring back a highest rated loser and then have a three way for the last round. or just keep it simple and continue in a forward motion.
----------------------
Mmmmm....a three-way...
...wait, what?
If all sixteen participants had submitted this round, we would've cut down to eight people, or four pairs. So allowing all ten non-forfeiters to advance would essentially just being adding one more pair of contestants than would have been the case otherwise. I'm not opposed to this, but then perhaps I'm a little biased as I am in one of the two non-forfeit matchups.
Of course, if we all advance, then that's not really fair to the axed round 1 contestants who didn't get that option, and I'd just as soon not see any huge drama flare up over this...so, eh, whatever. Val, I think you should just make an executive decision - trying to get 100% agreement on this will probably just prove more difficult than getting Shlongy to show us his hole.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-09-06 11:43:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
um.... well...... you're running the show now which i appreciates very much but I think, when last i looked, ten people submitted this round which would give us five pairs which would then be cut to five people so you'd bring back a highest rated loser and then have a three way for the last round. or just keep it simple and continue in a forward motion.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-06 11:25:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, drogo, in another situation, you may have legitimately gotten a spot is what I'm saying. Agreed, brdn, I'm just seeing that the pair winnars + winnars by forfeit will be an even number, so there'd be no highest rated nonwinnar spot the way it worked out. I do think it sucks that someone who participated consistently doesn't get a spot when so many will win by forfeit, you know? I don't know if there's a way around it or not, I've been too busy at work today to think about it much. Thoughts?
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-09-06 11:08:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
for my part I'm not opposed to everyone continuing but that's just me.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-09-06 10:26:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-06 10:08:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-06 09:22:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-09-05 19:15:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahah, did one person from every pair forfeit or what?
---------------------
Mein opponent did not forfeit.
*weeps*
===
EW YOU'D RATHER I HAD?
Drogo- I saw your question about next round. So far, it looks like with the way things worked out, we'll already have an even number. So I'm going to ask next round that IF YOU KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO FORFEIT ANYWAY, LET ME KNOW, AND DROGO CAN HAVE YOUR SPOT.
--
No no no no no no. I was beaten fair and square. I will sit out and watch the rest of you fight it out. I shall be back though oh yes I shall be back.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-06 10:16:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-06 10:08:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-06 09:22:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-09-05 19:15:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahah, did one person from every pair forfeit or what?
---------------------
Mein opponent did not forfeit.
*weeps*
===
EW YOU'D RATHER I HAD?
========================
Hell no. You're one of the few consistent good writers that I enjoy reading. I just knew you'd give me a run for my money...
Actually, we'd be pretty close in the running, if not for that damn Surgeon alter randomly dicking up the place. Ah well. Barring no major surprises today, have fun in round 3 - you've probably got more time to write something for it than I do right now.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-06 10:08:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-06 09:22:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-09-05 19:15:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahah, did one person from every pair forfeit or what?
---------------------
Mein opponent did not forfeit.
*weeps*
===
EW YOU'D RATHER I HAD?
Drogo- I saw your question about next round. So far, it looks like with the way things worked out, we'll already have an even number. So I'm going to ask next round that IF YOU KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO FORFEIT ANYWAY, LET ME KNOW, AND DROGO CAN HAVE YOUR SPOT.
K, back to a 2 hour meeting for me.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-09-06 09:43:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-06 09:22:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-09-05 19:15:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahah, did one person from every pair forfeit or what?
---------------------
Mein opponent did not forfeit.
*weeps*
--
Nor did mine dammit.
Damn damn damn damn damn damn damn
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-06 09:22:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-09-05 19:15:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahah, did one person from every pair forfeit or what?
---------------------
Mein opponent did not forfeit.
*weeps*
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-09-05 19:31:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You'd better forfeit to me, Ax, if we end up battling in the next round.
Because, even as great as Shlongy is, his "fans" will make sure he can't win.
Unless you throw the match.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-09-05 19:15:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahah, did one person from every pair forfeit or what?
Submitted by Natures_Biggest_Mistake (user info) at 2007-09-05 09:40:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I couldnt even be fucked to read this.
Loved it dude.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-09-05 09:29:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I NEED forfeits to survive...so, who's going to forfeit to Shlongy in Round 3?
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-09-05 09:03:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmm...
I'm not sure what to think about any of this.
All these forfeits are dissapointing. At the same time, my tale is doing quite well and I can barely recall even writing the thing. I do remember thinking that it was shit when I was done. I don't think anyone who ACTUALLY participated in this round should be eliminated - everybody on to R3!!!
**madly dances off to play on Saturn**
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-09-05 09:03:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What???
6 Forfeits and I didnt get one. damn damn damn damn damn.
I'm out. Past tense run over.
*sniff*
Will I get a loser place?? I have always been proud of my loser status
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-05 08:49:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
O...dude...a forfeit?!?!?
I am most disappointed. 'Twas looking forward to your spin on your title.
C'est la vie.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-05 08:45:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-04 21:42:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OW
I mean "Doctored."
Didn't want to forfeit on you, Thorny.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/111470
------------------------------------
Ahahahahahahahaha. Well played...the filename alone will earn it a +2 from me once the round ends.
You sho' do make me work for my money, missum.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-05 01:28:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Brdn_Nkd http://www.ubersite.com/m/111460
vs.DrogoRoch http://www.ubersite.com/m/111453
Lips Like Morphine
Phuzzygish: FEVER-INDUCED FORFEIT
vs.Susie_Derkins http://www.ubersite.com/m/111471
Wednesday Went Wicked
Kaos-king http://www.ubersite.com/m/111463
vs.Orgasmatron FORFEIT
The Last Minutes of Sunshine
Sacrilicious http://www.ubersite.com/m/111470
vs.Captain Thorns http://www.ubersite.com/m/111462
Doctored
DudeThatsBosh UNBOSH FORFEIT
vs.Axolotl http://www.ubersite.com/m/111457
Show Me Heaven
Inion_de_trua WHOREFEIT
vs. Shlongy http://www.ubersite.com/m/111469
The Fear of Fire
Kre8rix FORF8
vs.DeadToast http://www.ubersite.com/m/111398
Never Make a Promise
Jeanneee FORFEIT
vs.Fey http://www.ubersite.com/m/111444
In the Ashes of Our Century
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-05 00:13:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wait, WHAT?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-09-04 23:52:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have nothing to say and, even if I did, I have no way to say it.
:(
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-09-04 22:09:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I bet if you posted a new camwhore - and put just a LITTLE effort into THAT, maybe some blush and some eye liner - you'd sweep to victory.
We can still celebrate my victory by spooning naked.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-09-04 22:04:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
forfeit.
cuz i just got home and i have nothing.
to the pga master it is.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-09-04 22:00:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Let's make out.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-09-04 21:54:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's not good, but I posted. I'll try to get my next entry in before a lot of homework is assigned. I can't rely on forfeiture every time. http://www.ubersite.com/m/111471
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-04 21:42:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OW
I mean "Doctored."
Didn't want to forfeit on you, Thorny.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/111470
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-09-04 21:00:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OK, I'm in.
The Fear of Fire.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/111469
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-09-04 15:48:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"The Last Minutes Of Sunshine"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/111463
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-04 15:44:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Doctored: http://www.ubersite.com/m/111462
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-04 14:51:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-09-04 14:34:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
It'll take all the luck in the world for me to have a post in by midnight tonight.
Or, someone could always EMAIL me something neat to post...that would work.
---------------------
So where's your e-mail address, then?
Oh, yeah...it'd get spammed in five minutes flat.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-09-04 14:34:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
It'll take all the luck in the world for me to have a post in by midnight tonight.
Or, someone could always EMAIL me something neat to post...that would work.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-09-04 13:53:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ATTN: SUSIE DERKINS:
Phuzzy e-mailed me- he's sick and won't be able to post. So you're onto next round as long as you do.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-09-04 13:34:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that's what I got:
Lips Like Morphine: http://www.ubersite.com/m/111460
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-09-04 11:44:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/111457 Show Me Heaven
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-09-04 10:45:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I know I should have just forfeited but just thought I would give it a go anyway.
http://www.ubersite.com/cgi-bin/message_get.cgi?message=1188917037131724319
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-04 08:48:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-09-03 18:15:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I predict DeadToast will win this, by sheer dint of being the only person who posts.
---------------------------
Two down, one forfeit, thirteen of us remaining to post....
Yup, I smell some forfeits.
Possibly myself included, if I don' get started here soon. My first idea didn't pan out very well.
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-09-04 03:58:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I should have just coasted through on my forfeiting opponent. But um, fuck it; http://www.ubersite.com/m/111444
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-09-04 03:49:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So I can get to round 3 and still not have posted anything? Oh... ehm... Good?
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-09-03 23:40:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-09-03 18:03:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The thing is, the story I'm writing refuses to condense and I don't have the time or inspiration to write a new one. Help.
Seriously, anybody out there interested in being emailed my story so far to give me feedback?
---------
Don't stress on it dude, you could post a picture of Fluteboy riding a kitten and you'd win by default. I forfeited.
Submitted by DeadToast (user info) at 2007-09-03 19:23:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A few hours to go...
Submitted by DeadToast (user info) at 2007-09-03 19:22:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-09-03 18:15:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I predict DeadToast will win this, by sheer dint of being the only person who posts.
----
My genius is FINALLY realized.
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-09-03 18:15:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I predict DeadToast will win this, by sheer dint of being the only person who posts.
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-09-03 18:03:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The thing is, the story I'm writing refuses to condense and I don't have the time or inspiration to write a new one. Help.
Seriously, anybody out there interested in being emailed my story so far to give me feedback?
Submitted by DeadToast (user info) at 2007-09-01 04:24:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/111398
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2007-09-01 04:06:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i didn't mean to forfeit :(
this thing was scheduled for the week i moved into my new apartment and started classes. plus i got 300 pages of reading to do on syllabus day.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-31 10:42:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*dies*
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-31 10:17:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
CT- Yes. But that someone else is as unskilled as a 13 year old boy, or most republicans. It's not a thrill, it just takes longer :(
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-31 10:02:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-31 08:31:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, EI. So far I'm learning to use the mouse with my left hand, and I'm expecting a big bag of fluffy sparkly green herbal medicine some time this evening.
------------------------
So when you click your mouse with your non-dominant hand, does it feel like someone else is doing it?
Not that *I* would know this from experience.
*glances around furtively*
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-31 08:31:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, EI. So far I'm learning to use the mouse with my left hand, and I'm expecting a big bag of fluffy sparkly green herbal medicine some time this evening.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-31 08:29:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-08-31 00:00:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-30 16:05:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"acute tendonitis indicative of carpal tunnel syndrome"
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
OW
-------------------
Ice those bitches down and for God's sake quit stroking it so much.
===
I did a google search for "carpal tunnel female masturbation," but all I get is jokes.
I was being serious.
Submitted by Hairdo2000 (user info) at 2007-08-31 04:26:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-31 03:14:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
CTS sounds no fun at all, I have all kinds of things wrong with me so if you ever need to know the best stuff to get from the pharamcy just ask me, however I know nothing about lubricants.
or condoms
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-08-31 00:00:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-30 16:05:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"acute tendonitis indicative of carpal tunnel syndrome"
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
OW
-------------------
Ice those bitches down and for God's sake quit stroking it so much.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-30 16:11:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Carpal Tunnel Syndrome? No. Lumber Lung? No. Jugglers despair?
No. Achy-Breaky Pelvis? No. Oh, I'm never going to be disabled.
I'm sick of being so healthy! Hey wait -- Hyper-Obesity. If you
weigh more than 300 pounds, you qualify as disabled.
-- Homer Simpson
King-Size Homer
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-30 16:05:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"acute tendonitis indicative of carpal tunnel syndrome"
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
OW
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-30 15:52:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HEY CRYSTLE!
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-08-30 15:08:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HEY!
how come y'all didn't tell me you were here?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 14:44:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm that faggot, shlongy
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-30 14:43:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Who the faggot who just went and +2-ed every Bosh post since 1918?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 14:41:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i think i bumped your overall rating up pretty well too, boshman
don't ban me bart. god knows i get pissy when i have to use that flakmonkey account.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 14:40:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
well...you guys hadn't been there in 90 years. we didn't have the heart to deny you after we have gone to and won SO many of them.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-30 14:39:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
scourge might have just broken uber... BOSH OVERLOAD!!!!!!!
hahahahahah
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-30 14:36:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...because that went so well the last time.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 14:22:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WAIT A MINUTE.
If it's ends up being a Cards vs. RedSox Series (yeah, yeah, yeah...longshot i know.) all bets are off.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-30 12:37:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll be merging "Show me your hole" with "CANASTA" in my story...I may even include the title I was assigned at some point.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-30 12:32:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm hoping I can find a way to merge "the last minutes of sunshine" and "canasta" into the same story.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-30 12:29:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Blah, Blah, Blah... I don't care.
Everything I keep thinking up for "Last Minutes Of Sunshine" seems lame and cliched.
Vexed, I am. Quited vexed, indeed...
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-30 12:04:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shlongy's award ceremony: http://www.ubersite.com/m/111345
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-08-30 11:34:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i knew i forgot to so something.
at least i fed the cat.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 11:02:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
if the cubs win the whole thing i'll be pissed that i can't say they didn't go a whole century. i've BEEN saying a century for about the last five years anyway...i just want it to be official.
not worried about that possibility though.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:43:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
if the cubs win i'll make a tribute post to earl scr-...
buahahahhahahahahhahaha
sorry, couldn't get through it.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:42:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:40:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:37:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:33:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you can have #1, boshman. i'll drop them all sometime today as time allows.
and just because i'm a good sport you can add to that, if the redsox go all the way and WIN the world series, i'll do a huge tribute post.
---
I think Bosh and I should do a Cardinals tribute post if they make it all the way to the end and win the big bitch. It's only fair, you know.
====
WELL WHAT WAS WRONG WITH DOING IT LAST YEAR?
-------------------
Whatcha gonna do if the CUBS win?!?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:40:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:37:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:33:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you can have #1, boshman. i'll drop them all sometime today as time allows.
and just because i'm a good sport you can add to that, if the redsox go all the way and WIN the world series, i'll do a huge tribute post.
---
I think Bosh and I should do a Cardinals tribute post if they make it all the way to the end and win the big bitch. It's only fair, you know.
====
WELL WHAT WAS WRONG WITH DOING IT LAST YEAR?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:38:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:35:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bless you Sacrilicious. It's nice to be imortant but more important to be nice.
As for you CT, you can sell your ass on some other street corner, we are SO over.
------------------
Sell? I was giving it away for free!!!
Saccy - no worries. Carpal's not something to fool around with...hope you get better soon.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:37:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that seems agreeable.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:37:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:33:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you can have #1, boshman. i'll drop them all sometime today as time allows.
and just because i'm a good sport you can add to that, if the redsox go all the way and WIN the world series, i'll do a huge tribute post.
---
I think Bosh and I should do a Cardinals tribute post if they make it all the way to the end and win the big bitch. It's only fair, you know.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:35:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bless you Sacrilicious. It's nice to be imortant but more important to be nice.
As for you CT, you can sell your ass on some other street corner, we are SO over.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:33:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you can have #1, boshman. i'll drop them all sometime today as time allows.
and just because i'm a good sport you can add to that, if the redsox go all the way and WIN the world series, i'll do a huge tribute post.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:32:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
EI- incorrect. it was impossible to ignore your emission.
Jake- most guys worry when we DON'T get periods. Are you nesting?
Thing is, I don't know why sico would care, unless he's been convinced to. We were always cool and this doesn't seem his style. Read between these lines all you want.
Apparently I have what appears to be carpal tunnel, this is news to me. I'm going to the doctor today but my ability to type, write, etc is at risk right now. Though i'd give that up to be able to open a fucking bottle at the moment. I might be going into limited or shorthand mode very soon. CT, I'll try not to let this get in the way but I can't promise.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:29:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
next someone is going to come in here and say, 'AH HA, LOOK HOW EASILY I MANIPULATED YOU ALL. I BLAH BLAH BLAH AND THEN YOU BLAH BLAHED. YOU'RE ALL SOOOOOOOOOOOOO EASY.'
clearly a strategist of the highest caliber at work here.
you should all be very scared. as for me...well i styled myself as an uber badboy all along, so i'm safe.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:28:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
a condition of #3 is you have to be quite verbose with your enthusiasm for the Red Sox here on Uber.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:27:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
scourge, you owe me 80 +2s.
I will offer you an alternative, though.. choose one of the following.
1) gimme +2s
2) a pound of flesh
2) root for the Red Sox for the rest of this season.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:23:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So what's this I hear about cheating? Look I know the prize of a few of Shlongy's pubic hairs is tempting, fuck I almost signed up myself, but honestly, cheating? Where's your integrity?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:20:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bisecksual below
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:16:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I also slept with CaptainThornybottom
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:12:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-30 08:57:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HAHA- So all we get is a link to an old review? How anticlimactic. Translation: 'Mystery' Uberboard man can't access any of his alters at the moment, I suppose.
--------------------
Yeah, Simon's losing his magickal touch.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-30 10:02:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I slept with Sacrilicious, that's the Uber gossip but shhh she doesn't know about it.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-30 09:59:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Aw man, a link?
This is more lame than that cripple chick I banged out in the autumn of '99.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-30 09:56:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OMG!
Someone is using me as a pawn in their little game. The Machiavellian nature of this whole thing is mind blowing.
DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-08-30 09:33:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
STOP HAVING PERIODS. IT WORRIES US.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-30 09:04:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I was most disappointed, we need a good Uber scandel again.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-30 08:57:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HAHA- So all we get is a link to an old review? How anticlimactic. Translation: 'Mystery' Uberboard man can't access any of his alters at the moment, I suppose.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-30 03:42:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I predict a riot.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2007-08-30 03:23:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-08-29 19:43:14 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Uh, yeah... I forfeit
=======
Ha, my prediction is Fey wins it all through a series of forfeits, shitty poems, and bad Shlongy jokes.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-08-29 22:43:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Uh, yeah... I forfeit
Submitted by DeadToast (user info) at 2007-08-29 18:07:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Cheaters go to hell.
See ya there!
Maybe I should start my post...
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-29 17:40:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-07-31 11:58:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
YOO AV OO EAK UT I ANT HEAR YOO IF AHL IS OCK IN I OUF
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-29 17:15:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't even think her tongue stud will be covered, Mini Meat.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-29 17:11:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Think she'll be able to laugh with her mouth full?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-29 17:09:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why not Lishy. They *do* say that laughter is the best medicine.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-29 17:03:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If it'll help you feel better, you could blow me.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-29 16:52:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Maybe I wouldn't have to resort to extremes IF I EVER GOT MY GODDAMNED COOKIES WHEN I REALLY WON.
Today:
-I've sprained or somethinged my wrist. It's in a brace.
-My shoe broke.
-I'm having an allergy thingy.
-I'm menstruating.
-There's no twix.
ALL of these things are more important to me than wait what are we talking about?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-29 16:41:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
are you guys fucking cheating?
Jesus Christ...I know the Internets are Serious Business, but this is getting ridiculous. i mean, the $7M prize and the month long orgasm that you receive for winning aren't really worth the effort of cheating.
i have to say, i'm disappointed in both of you.
oh, some of the alters are bret, too, Capt. aparently some of them are me too.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-08-29 16:34:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
rating the poster, not the post
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-29 16:11:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"I think I've reached a point in my life where I can tell the difference between nougat and cookie."
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-29 15:47:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I gernally assume that ANY alter not proven otherwise belongs to Simon.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-29 15:44:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"THEY WERE ALL TWIX!! IT WAS A SETUP!!"
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-29 15:31:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
George Costanza tried that once and it all BLEW UP IN HIS FACE.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-29 15:25:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OH NOES TEH SCANDALOUSNESS!!!!11
Personally, I would have spent that $1 on some Twix.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-29 15:18:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh boy, I sure hope the details posted tomorrow involve how Si(cosemen)mon emailed me and asked to make sure Sacrilicious knew that azurefroz (read: sicosemen) would be unable to participate in Round 2 and to remove him from the list.
Because, y'know, no one had any idea azurefroz was sicosemen.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2007-08-29 10:19:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
God Bless America.
http://youtube.com/?v=qQdhMSEqhfg
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-29 10:02:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-29 09:49:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 18:01:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
w...t...f
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDyFckxE8HU
---
Why is that panda playing with a detached panda penis?
--
I think the real question here is, why hasn't she been playing with it all along?
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-29 09:49:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 18:01:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
w...t...f
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDyFckxE8HU
---
Why is that panda playing with a detached panda penis?
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-29 08:47:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-28 17:19:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"and we can't forget Fey..."
___
Well, you can try. I'm not going to help, though.
___
Not intentionally, anyway.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-29 08:29:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-08-28 18:07:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 18:01:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
w...t...f
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDyFckxE8HU
---
I can't believe I watched the whole thing.
__________________
That dude looks WAY more into the tune than the chick does.
I think they filmed that at their Grandma's house, too...
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2007-08-29 07:51:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Woooooooo.
I thought I crashed and burned, actually...
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-08-29 04:12:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fey to win!
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-29 03:57:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I figured all you existentialist pseudo-intellectual tofu-eating youngsters that live on Uber would eat the lyrics up.
_____
Ha!
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-08-28 22:31:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:36:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ATTN: SUSIE_DERKINS: YOUR OPPONENT IS PHUZZYGISH.
HOT.
-------------
That IS hot. I'll try not to be lame and forfiet, but I will be really busy and not near a computer a lot between now and Tuesday.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 20:42:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know where I came up with this brilliant band and catchy as hell song?
Every week, "Weeds" on Showtime ends with some random song by usually, some band you've never heard of, although even people like Elvis Costello and Randy newman have contirbuted.
This tune ended last week's episode.
It took me like 4 days to figure out who the fuck did it.
It kicks ass.
I figured all you existentialist pseudo-intellectual tofu-eating youngsters that live on Uber would eat the lyrics up.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 20:39:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well there's too much talk about God and not enough showing of hole.
But besides that, it's a damn catchy song.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 20:32:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.myspace.com/thethermals
HERE'S YOUR FUTURE (Thank Shlongy Later after you listen to your new favorite song)
God reached his hand down from the sky
He flooded the land then he set it on fire
He said, "Fear me again. Know I'm your father.
Remember that no one can breathe underwater"
So bend your knees and bow your heads
Save your babies, here's your future
Yeah, here's your future
God reached his hand down from the sky
God asked Noah if he wanted to die
He said "No sir
Oh, no, sir"
God said "Here's your future
It's gonna rain"
So we're packing our things
We're building a boat
We're gonna create the new master race
Cause we're so pure
Oh, Lord, we're so pure
So here's your future
God told his son, "It's time to come home
I promise you won't have to die all alone
I need you to pay for the sins I create"
His son said, "I will, but Dad . . . I'm afraid"
Yeah, so here's your future
Here's your future
Yeah, here's your future
So here's your future
So here's your future
So here's your future
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-08-28 20:16:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HEY!!! Hey Scourge!
Aren't these titles liek totally teh KICK ASS???
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 20:16:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
At work, I printed out the sheets of tittles and cut them up all official like...the thought that someone might get to the printer before me and see it was a terrifying and hilarious thought.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-28 19:13:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm not a forfeiter! i'm just chairman of the 'Shlongy For The Win' campaign committee!
all i know is i better see my great title, 'boobs', in round three or HEADS WILL ROLL.
Shlongy, I have a great draft for your round two submission. now who are you going against that i have to go -2 the hell out of? i didn't even bother looking.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 18:19:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
AND WAIT JUST A GODDAMN MINUTE WHY AM I EXPLAINING MYSELF TO YOU?
FORFEITERS DON'T GET AN OPINION. THE END.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 18:17:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I did NOT throw out all your titles. There were OMG LIEK A MILLION!!1 in there, man.
Also, I had beer-turtle on the original list, until I read it again and he said he didn't have time or some blah blah I HAD WORK TO DO OK.
Now I'm going to go get Chinese food with someone I DON'T KNOW FROM THE INTERNET WHO'S NOT ALWAYS FUCKING JUDGING ME OK?? FUCK.
(Yes, I'm having hormonal issues today.)
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-28 18:10:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
so...you purposely threw out any title that eiher shlongy or i submitted. it's fucking obvious. these chaos-king titles are gay as hell. fuck i hate that guy and his pompous posturing bullshit.
hey chaos, if i ever see you in person i'm gonna slap the nancy out of you, understand?
also, the whole beer-turtle thing is bullshit. he posted something regarding round one of this contest and it had a higher rating. he wins.
don't you understand?
TEH INTERNETS ARE SERIOUS BUSINESS!
jesus
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-08-28 18:07:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 18:01:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
w...t...f
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDyFckxE8HU
---
I can't believe I watched the whole thing.
... is that Thorpe?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 18:01:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
w...t...f
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDyFckxE8HU
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2007-08-28 17:50:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Round 2 Matches and Titties?
damnit!
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-08-28 17:42:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Someone's a Kill Hannah fan
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-28 17:19:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"and we can't forget Fey..."
___
Well, you can try. I'm not going to help, though.
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2007-08-28 16:40:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm actually fairly excited about my title; which inevitably means I'll fuck it up somehow.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 16:30:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes they are, dicknose.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 16:28:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No they're not, assface.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-08-28 16:08:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Your titles are much better than the first round.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-28 15:07:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hey man you spelled check wrong
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-08-28 15:07:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2STUDENT AID CHEQUES CAME TODAY I CAN BUY DONUTS NOW
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:57:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:48:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sprinkles = the gold standard. Anything less is uncivilized, pedestrian, wrong and smells of dirt and wet cereal boxes.
===
Get drunk on cheap beer in a can at any hick country shows lately, Mr Civilized?
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:55:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 10:17:52 PDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Haiku- maybe so, I'm not getting into the drama. Sico can write some good stuff when he wants to, so if he's still active and wants to, he can still play.
======
I saw the bit about azure not competing, but just for the record, I agree with the above.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:49:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yay!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:48:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"In some areas of the United States sprinkles are sometimes called jimmies."
Note: this only proves that "sprinkles" is what they are and what they should be called, because it does not read "In some areas of the United States jimmies are sometimes called sprinkles."
Sprinkles = the gold standard. Anything less is uncivilized, pedestrian, wrong and smells of dirt and wet cereal boxes.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:46:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thank you, Lambchop. Thank you for pointing out how silly that bit of rubespeak is.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:46:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh and to clarify: my jimmies were rainbow.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:43:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:24:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
The Color Mauve....Blows
I thought it would be funny if ghola got that cause she loves that color.
Lamb- (wiki)
Jimmies
In some areas of the United States sprinkles are sometimes called jimmies. In some areas, such as the Northeast (mainly the Boston area), "jimmies" applies to the chocolate (like the Dutch nl:Hagelslag) variety, with "sprinkles" being reserved for colored candy varieties. However, in other areas any elongated opaque variety (regardless of color) are called "jimmies", whereas only the smaller, round variety is referred to as "sprinkles".
[edit] Origin
A commentary in 1986 on National Public Radio by the late Boston poet John Ciardi claimed: "From the time I was able to run to the local ice cream store clutching my first nickel, which must have been around 1922, no ice cream cone was worth having unless it was liberally sprinkled with jimmies."[1]
In the 1930s, the Just Born candy company of Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, produced a topping called chocolate grains. The man who ran the machine that made these chocolate grains was named Jimmy Bartholomew. "Thus, his product became known as jimmies," said Ross Born, the chief executive officer.[1] He was told this story by his grandfather and company founder, Sam Born. Just Born registered jimmies as its trademark, and continued producing jimmies until the mid-1960s - which is why the name was so popular there.
Submitted by Lambchop (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:35:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:17:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:02:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
They're called SPRINKLES, rubelins.
===
JIMMIES
---
Why do you even call them Jimmies over there?
At least Sprinkles make sense.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:34:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think shlongy and I should have a secret bonus round with a title of his choosing.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:24:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I could have done WONDERS with any of these:
Fix that Vag Before It Stinks Up Everything
Heimlich Me Right Fucking Now
The Color Mauve....Blows
Shocking Ass Sounds
Spoogieface
CANASTA!!!
Also, still waiting on a response for my earlier demand of my opponent if I am to continue in this farce of a contest.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:17:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Canasta is a fantabulously fun card game. Even better when played drunk.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:10:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shlong- I drew them randomly from round 1. O wanted CANASTA real bad.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:09:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Agreed. I was totally hoping for "CANASTA!!!"
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 14:01:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Who picked these terrible fucking titles?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:49:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So we're not doing genres anymore?
Aw man. I was really hoping this round's style would be "Bowie."
http://youtube.com/watch?v=iR2L98gobTQ
Submitted by jamowilly40 (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:45:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This contest is quite possibly the dumbest idea ever.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:42:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
thanks for running with this, i'll try to get something written to avoid being a lame forfieter.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:36:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've just been informed that azurefroz, whose name I accidentally misspelled up there, will NOT be competing.
The next highest rated post belongs to:
PHUZZYGISH.
ATTN: SUSIE_DERKINS: YOUR OPPONENT IS PHUZZYGISH.
HOT.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:31:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And I shall make every striving to invest at LEAST an hour into this round's post. Scouts honor.
Regardless of how well I perform this round though, I still expect to be fully blown away by Lishy.
OOOH DOUBLE ENTENDRES
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:29:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BUT IT'S NOT A TRUE CONTEST WITHOUT THE SMACK TALK
On a side topic...I sayeth, good poet laureate, hast I offended thou somehow? You never responded to my e-mail a week ago...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:29:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'll only play again if my opponent blows me first.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:25:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd recommend cleaning your act up first.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:20:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, and you're going down, Lishy. You're going down hard.
And after you're finished going down, I'll clean your clit in round 2 as well.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:19:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto -2 for Jimmies.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:19:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Katy- I prefer tittles. But there's a titties left somewhere in the post.
p.s.- your opponent is shlongy. Show us your titties.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:19:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Doctored?"
DOCTORED???
Who submitted these titties?!?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:17:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:02:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
They're called SPRINKLES, rubelins.
===
JIMMIES
Haiku- maybe so, I'm not getting into the drama. Sico can write some good stuff when he wants to, so if he's still active and wants to, he can still play.
And DudeThatsBosh, it would be totally unbosh not to address you officially.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:17:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you misspelled titties.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:15:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
PS
You're not the only one with ideas, Weet Man. One for the greenthumb in '91? Hello, I'm Doctor Greenthumb.
Life's a garden, Dig it.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:14:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i love when people take the time to write out my name, i get a kick out of it.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:07:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Um, I highly doubt that Azurefroz is still active, considering sicosemen "revealed" it was his alter.
Looks like whoever got paired with froz is getting a bye.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:07:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
DudeThatsBosh vs.Axolotl
Show Me Heaven
-----------------------------
I got some good ideas. The title writes itself, but in many different directions.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:06:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
dude
fuckin ax man, weet.
gonna spin up a jibba and slice ya with it
bosh.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-08-28 13:02:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
They're called SPRINKLES, rubelins.