Transworld: BFG Vampire's Roadtrip (NSFW Imagery) (1473 hits)
Category: Business & FinancialRating: 0.53 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by icarus (View user info) at 2007-09-03 11:35:21 EDT
Big Fat Gay Vampire: http://www.ubersite.com/m/77185
Transexual Frankenstein: http://www.ubersite.com/m/77707
Random Baldwin Brother & James Woods VS BFG Vampire: http://www.ubersite.com/m/77540
BFG Cthulhu meets Emo Teen: http://www.ubersite.com/m/78022
BFG Harry Potter: http://www.ubersite.com/m/108947
And now:
"I'm bored." Sighed The Creature from the Uptown Lagoon. "Ever since the government stole all our fun in 2506, there's been nothing to do."
"I know." Said Big Fat Gay Vampire, "Since the robot Chinamen stole all our jobs, let's go on a road trip to Transworld."
"Oo," said the Creature, "we can sing show tunes!"
"BeauCOUP de Show tunes!" Added BFG Vampire.
So they hopped into their 2507 PT Cruiser and embarked on a National Lampoon-style adventure. After a hilarious mishap involving a Portuguese tourist, whose body would never be found by the authorities, they arrived at the gates of Transworld.
"W00t w00t w00t!," warbled a thing that looked like Woody Woodpecker, only with H cups and an 18" long, forked green penis that pulsed like an infected tomato in a B horror movie. "Welcome to Transworld! I'm Tranny the Tranpecker!"
"Gee," said BFG Vampire, "That's a fabulous costume. How do you get the, er, beak to, er, throb so realistically?"
"Yes, and those look SO real," said the Creature, fondling its downy, jiggly cleavage with its eyes (The Creature, after all, was only trendilly homosexual).
"It's not a costume." Tranny insisted. "You see, our founder, Paris Trump-Disney IIX, decided to create a master race by combining the genes of shemale porn stars with those of various animals."
BFG Vampire scratched his balding pate. "I don't see how THAT race would be superior unless you were some kind of pervert with latent furry--"
"Oh take me, you genetic superman!" Mumbled The Creature, throwing himself lasciviously on an amazingly busty Rupert the Bear.
BFG Vampire shrugged. "While in Rome," he said, heading for the glory hole in the men's outhouse.
Except for all the herpes, it was the BEST road trip ever.
User Reviews
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2007-09-12 03:59:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't read this, but this +2 is for a review you left on one of my posts that made me laugh really hard, about two minutes ago (I just now noticed the review, also, I'm drunk, and everyone else has gone to bed).
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-31 08:05:52 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2007-07-30 18:33:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-07-30 12:10:01 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Solid writing. Sounds like a zany place. I assume you're better off now, if this is indeed true?
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Indubitably, I now live in a magical place where an attractive woman loves to cook, and actually lets me have sex with her. There's a garden, and a slip n'slide, and my other roommate is my best friend, who likes to share his booze with me.
It's friggin' great.
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Is this one of those Japanese cartoons where most of the plots involve eating, and the world is peopled by purple haired broads whose minimum cup size is a generous B? I've always wanted to visit one of those.
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I don't know man, for some reason it tickled me pink.
Submitted by Surgeon (user info) at 2007-09-05 10:19:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
appendectomy..
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-09-04 22:13:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I find it funny that the PT Cruiser might last until 2507. Or that Chrysler might either.
Submitted by Empathetic (user info) at 2007-09-04 20:05:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck Uniter.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-09-04 19:51:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2007-09-04 14:14:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meh
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2007-09-03 14:18:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Fail.
Not a -2 because you actually included the genetic modification and future setting... other than that...
This sucked.
Bad.
Like a british crackwhore with oral sores and state funded dental gear blowjob bad.
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2007-09-03 14:03:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
DO A BARREL ROLL!
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-09-03 13:28:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Decent.
Submitted by RabiedRooster (user info) at 2007-09-03 12:18:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Mhuahahahaha
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-09-03 12:18:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by candyfloss01 (user info) at 2007-09-03 11:41:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Are you GHEI?
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This isn't about being streight or ghei. This is about telling a story. A story about a vampire who's not only has to deal with all the obesity in this crazy old world, but also with all the bigness and homosexuality.
Submitted by AllyJeans (user info) at 2007-09-03 11:50:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Dahl BFG's but still amusing.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-09-03 11:46:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I stirred.
Submitted by candyfloss01 (user info) at 2007-09-03 11:41:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Are you GHEI?