GRUEBERFEST '07 - 1st Round Matches (3337 hits)
Category: Computers & InternetLabels: GFest07
Rating: 0.83 on 280 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by kaos-king (antius777) (View user info) at 2007-10-01 10:01:44 EDT
"I have harnessed the shadows that stride from world to world to sow death and madness..." - H.P. Lovecraft
And so begins the 1ST ROUND of GRUEBERFEST '07!!! Here are your matches to start things off. Opponents have until 11:59pm EST tonight to provide a title to their terrible foe. Try to keep things out of the ridiculous, and somewhat in the topic of the competition. Any obvious bullshit titles CAN be contested, as well as massive drive-by alter attacks. (but I probably won't care) Anyone who hasn't received a title by then can either create their own, or have one provided by me.
Your tales are DUE by THURSDAY at 11:59pm EST
Voting ends SUNDAY night, and new matches will be posted MONDAY morning.
1 - Beeltea VS Whiskey_Jack
2 - Inion De Trua VS TechnoRatty
3 - Axolotl VS Captian Thorns
4 - Yellow-Man VS Big Mike
5 - Jamowilly VS Hourman
6 - Amontillado VS Mockidol
7 - Beer-Turtle VS ELG
8 - Lungfish VS ilikesteak
9 - BaronMunchausen VS Write-Of-Way
10 - Jack McCallum VS Monkeyswithguns
11 - Domenad VS HurtByTheSun
12 - BRDN NKD VS Forensic Girl
13 - Ballare VS Sir Cowman
14 - TTOM VS Skrapmetal
15 - Fungah VS ShapeShifter
16 - Zampano VS NintendoCzar
17 - Ghola VS Shlongy = SUPER SCARY BONUS EXTRA EVIL MATCH of MAYHEM
18 - Orgasmatron - Has a "buy" into the 2nd round as previous organizer of this competition if he so chooses.
User Reviews
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-10-06 15:53:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait, I just noticed kaos-king is not IN in this.
BOOOOOO (disappointed boo, not scary boo)
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-05 12:05:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
1st ROUND ORGANIZED into MATCH-UPS w/ LINKS
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112264
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-05 01:08:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
UNITER - - personally, I find your ratings to be fair & honest, if not all together that useful since you rarely leave any comments. I'm just saying, a little actual feedback on WHY you rate the way you do sometimes would be helpful. For instance, you just left a pretty good critique of Forensic's post below... no reason why you couldn't have told her that to begin with. I dunno...
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-10-05 01:02:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lately started, lately finished and lately posted.
At least I'm consistent.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112263
Submitted by NintendoCzar (user info) at 2007-10-05 00:12:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-04 11:17:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Zampano - - Do whatever you feel comfortable with, man. I would tell you to go ahead and post. Even if you have to forfeit in later rounds or you get beat out in this one, and least you made the beginning attempt.
I like how it automatically assumed that if he posted his story, he'd beat me. I sorta wish he had, because now I gotta write something for the next round, and this story was shitty enough :P
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-10-04 22:32:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-10-04 10:10:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Kaos-
I know this will be a pain in the ass and will make me appear to be a whiney bitch but could you discount ALL of that twat-extraordinaire 'The Uniter's' ratings...
=============================
Forensic makes me laugh.
I rated her an average +1, on several reviews. I see other people reviewing dozens of times. Who fucking cares?
This is an internet forum, you know. People can argue and/or discuss things back and forth.
Or is this activity only available to people on some secret list or something?
If you want to know my reasons for the re-rate, it was because I read a couple of really fantastic stories, which were both +2s, and decided Forensic's story didn't quite measure up.
So I went back and adjusted to a +1 from the original +2.
I suffer from premature evaluation.
It's embarrassing, and I really don't like to talk about it, but there it is.
Then TigerLilly asked if I was bi-polar, and I responded.
Then Icarus chimed in and I responded to him.
And so it goes.
It was hardly anything, really. Especially for ubersite.
I didn't go out of my way to flame anyone. I think a -2 is the way to do that.
And while I'm sure I give out fewer +2s than most, I'm pretty sure I give out fewer -2s. also.
Forensic started whining about me ever since I gave her a -1 on a story a while back. Since then she cries about it regularly.
Once a month, I think.
It's been very inconvenient for me, because I really try to follow her instructions. I can't tell you how many times I've run out the door to buy a bullet, only to find the gun rental store has a waiting period.
I wish I could take back that goddamn -1 I gave her MONTHS AGO, but I can't.
Apparently, there are no take-backs on uber. There is, however, much crying.
So I weep for the anguish my ratings have caused ForensicGirl3.
Seriously though, her story was a little cliched and derivative, and the ending was telegraphed too soon.
On the positive, however, she took the time to develop the story and the characters, and let the tension build fairly well.
That's a +1 to me.
However, having said all this, if she is soooooooooooooo upset about my +1, I have no objection to my rating being discounted to keep her happy.
You can even discount all my ratings for every entry. It's your contest. I really don't mind at all.
But until the local gunshop changes its policy, that's as far as I go.
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-10-04 21:30:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So... I've got a test to study for. I'll still write a story over the weekend sometime but it's just not going to happen in the next couple hours.
Submitted by mockidol (user info) at 2007-10-04 19:57:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My Story - Lab Creation:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112257
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-04 19:08:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112254
LONG!!!
The perfect read if you are constipated and plan on sitting a while. Enjoy!
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-10-04 16:01:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck the Uniter.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-04 15:54:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
PLUSSSS I forfeit.
My forfeit wins though.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-04 15:36:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm gonna hunt down Bill Gates and cut his fucking balls off. My wonderful PC here at work froze up and I lost somewheer btwn 1 and 2 pages of story.
That shit happens with this PC all the time.
That shit never happens with my MAC at home.
God damn it.
Submitted by YELLOW-MAN (user info) at 2007-10-04 15:21:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah I forfeit, i've got too much shit to do lately. I got a nother damn research paper last minute by my english professor. On top of a damn speech to prepare for in just a few days. I have some stuff written but i'll probably have to post it on a later date, i'm sorry for the inconvenience.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-04 14:24:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
SOMEBODY HELP ME KILL THIS MONSTER!!!
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2007-10-04 11:48:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112225
Mah entry.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-04 11:33:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yessir i got both.
will email you back about the one later on today. u are teh roxxors.
i just thought it was curious that she requested all the uniters ratings on her post be discounted.
no matter.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-04 11:32:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-04 11:29:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-04 11:27:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
why on earth would you want to discount all of uniter's ratings?
_________________________
I think she just meant on her post - Icarus & he got into a verbal battle there.
Hey Ghola... did you get that THING I sent ya???
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-04 11:29:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-04 11:27:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
why on earth would you want to discount all of uniter's ratings?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-04 11:21:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Here's mine:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/111998
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-04 11:17:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Forensic - - Titles for R1 are due by tonight (Thur 4th) at 11:59pm EST. Voting ends Sunday night (7th) at 11:59pm. ROUND 2 matches & R1 results will be posted Monday morning (8th) at some point. ROUND 2 posts will be due by Thursday (11th) at 11:59pm EST. Voting on them will end THAT Sunday (14th) at 11:59pm EST... and so on... every Friday will have a SUM UP post containing all the match ups with the apprpriate links.
Zampano - - Do whatever you feel comfortable with, man. I would tell you to go ahead and post. Even if you have to forfeit in later rounds or you get beat out in this one, and least you made the beginning attempt.
Submitted by Zampano (user info) at 2007-10-04 10:51:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm really hesitant to decide whether to post my story or forfeit now, as my schedule is helplessly busy for the next few weeks and I can only give so little time to writing in a genre that I am no good with. Actually, my story is simply terrible. Are there are any benefits for trying to continue, or should I just fail now and get it out of the way?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-10-04 10:45:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok then one more thing K
I'm going out of town on Friday and will be back Sunday. When will it be decided who advances and when does round 2 start (meaning when are the titles due)?
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2007-10-04 10:35:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yay! Another stupid "competition"
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-04 10:34:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Forensic - -
Currently you have 63 reviews on your post and BRDN NKD has 40. Not too big a difference.
In any case, I'm going to do a follow up post on Friday morning that will reshow all the contestants, who they are up against and post the appropriate links to the tales. I'm doing this to help drum up MORE direct votes. I've already sought out advice from my selected pannel, and they've all agreed with me so far on this course of action.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-10-04 10:10:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Kaos-
I know this will be a pain in the ass and will make me appear to be a whiney bitch but could you discount ALL of that twat-extraordinaire 'The Uniter's' ratings and all expect ONE of Icarius'?
See, the twat and Icarius were arguing on my Gruberfest entry. The twat first gave me a +2 then went back much later and gave me a 0.
THAT isn't what's bugging me. Icarius, who liked the story, gave me +2 and then proceeded to remind the twat that he/she is, you know, a twat.
Being that The Uniter is sooooo superior to the rest of us, proceeded to argue with Icarius. Every time Icarius would respond, he'd give me a +2.
Now don't get me wrong, I dig that Icarius liked my story and +2'd me, but because The Uniter is such a, you know, twat, it knocked my story up to most heated.
I just want everything to be fair and having a Gruberfest entry on MH may not be fair to the rest of the contestants and the ratings might be skewed.
So, if you would please manually calculate my average after discounting ALL of The Uniter's ratings and all but ONE of Icarius', I think that might even things out a bit.
Thanks and sorry about the whine.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-10-04 09:41:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
R1: "Taking a Bit of Foreskin With You Up to Jesus" - http://www.ubersite.com/m/112221
Submitted by NintendoCzar (user info) at 2007-10-04 05:32:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112214
--------------------------------------
Some spelling errors, short, and probably shit. Not to mention a terrible camwhore at the end. The goal is to get the lowest score possible, like golf, right?
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2007-10-04 04:55:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112211
Hey do I get bonus points for writing it in the dark really late at night?
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2007-10-04 04:23:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think your timings on this competition is completely pants. Your expecting people to vote on a friday day could work, sure. But on a friday night and weekend? Not so smrt.
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-10-04 01:25:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Killy Von McStabbandmurder III: Footloose in Havana"
I should have gone with that
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-10-04 00:17:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112207
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2007-10-03 23:02:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-03 15:05:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh and by the way Skrap. I shant be reviewing yours to prevent an escalation like that poetry thing with Shlongy.
While that was funny, it was also really dumb.
-----------
<extends lower lip, lowers gaze, mutters, finds a dirt road and shuffles down it>
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2007-10-03 20:23:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112201
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2007-10-03 18:47:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My entry:
Fuck it - Grueberfest 07 - So I married a Fungah
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2007-10-03 18:36:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Would posting my entry today, after the thing I already posted today effect my score in grueberfest?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-03 16:37:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm fucked.
I just thought all of you should know.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-03 16:16:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
QuinnTheEskimo/Sir-Cowman
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112196
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-03 16:16:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ShapeShifter
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112190
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-03 15:05:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh and by the way Skrap. I shant be reviewing yours to prevent an escalation like that poetry thing with Shlongy.
While that was funny, it was also really dumb.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-03 14:54:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yo: http://www.ubersite.com/m/112195
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2007-10-03 14:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112194
I'm in.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-10-03 14:31:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So far there's been some really good stories to come out of this. Can't wait to see what crops up tomorrow, on deadline day.
That being said, I'd better wrap up my story...
*scurries off to laboratory*
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-03 13:56:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How about, So I married a Fungus?
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2007-10-03 13:33:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Do I get a title or what?
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-03 12:28:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jamowilly40 (user info) at 2007-10-02 18:10:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hourman -
Let's go with 'Fractured'.
_________________
Ummm, you're a lil' late to the game, my friend...
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-10-03 11:11:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The Early Flesh Harvest- Grueberfest 2007
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112188
oops
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-10-03 11:11:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The Early Flesh Harvest- Grueberfest 2007
www.ubersite.com/m/112188
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-10-03 11:09:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-02 07:55:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-10-02 03:39:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
KK gimme a title please.
___________________________
"12 Minutes To Midnight" or "The Early Flesh Harvest"
---------------------
Sorry Jamo I did the one KK provided for me!! I went with The Early Flesh Harvest.
Sorry mate.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-03 03:55:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Lungfish
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112179
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-10-03 02:11:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Last Year's Skeleton: http://www.ubersite.com/m/112175
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-02 21:36:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Forensic
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112166
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-10-02 20:21:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2007-10-02 10:00:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Highvoltage sighting
Submitted by jamowilly40 (user info) at 2007-10-02 18:10:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hourman -
Let's go with 'Fractured'.
Submitted by TechnoRatty (user info) at 2007-10-02 17:51:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey Inion De Trua, here is my "effort"
http://www.ubersite.com/cgi-bin/message_get.cgi?message=1191361642951719893
cheers!
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-10-02 17:18:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
More like divine being.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-10-02 17:05:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-02 15:59:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Monkeyswithguns
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112159
---------------------------------------------------------
thanks!
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-02 15:59:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Monkeyswithguns
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112159
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2007-10-02 13:24:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, here's mine.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112156
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-10-02 13:12:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well Forensic..... here's your opportunity to defeat me: http://www.ubersite.com/m/112154
crap.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-02 12:27:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hope to hell all of you losers camp on my next post.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-02 11:50:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-10-02 10:10:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm not a man!
--
So, animal then?
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-02 10:10:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
GF07 - Baron MAuchausen
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112137
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-10-02 10:10:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm not a man!
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2007-10-02 10:00:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Highvoltage sighting
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-02 09:03:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes, yes, my twisted lil' freaks... write for me!!!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-10-02 08:57:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2007-10-01 20:59:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-10-01 19:02:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-10-01 10:54:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hang on, theres not many women in this competition, fingers crossed for a Lungfish victory!
------
GAH!!!!
ilikesteak -- I like it.
Amontillado -- You can have me anytime you want.
Fuck. I have to write something.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What the FUCK?
Since when was lungfish a chick?
======================================
He's not, Amontillado is of the female variety. I refer you to Uberdirectory section 2.A.1a.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2007-10-02 08:46:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
YELLOW MAN
Titles for you to choose:
"Butchers Ballet"
"The Stronghold"
"Seventeen Years"
"Biodegradable"
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-02 07:55:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-10-02 03:39:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
KK gimme a title please.
___________________________
"12 Minutes To Midnight" or "The Early Flesh Harvest"
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-10-02 04:18:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
How about "The Mysterious Shrinking Salmon"
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-10-02 04:05:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ok....Love, Lust and Libraries
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-10-02 03:57:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is a horror comp... not a gay pride rally... I want a real title dag nabbit
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-10-02 03:50:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hour man your title is 'The Bride of EmissionImpossible'
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-10-02 03:39:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
KK gimme a title please.
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2007-10-02 01:56:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ELG sorry for delay been crushing out my homework so I will have time to write this.
Title(s) since you gave me three
I give you: The Devil is in the Details, Etched in Stone, or, Do you smell that?
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-10-02 00:56:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WRITE DRUNK DURING THE WEEK???? I HAVE A JOB, YOU KNOW!!!!!!
I'm trying, man. I'm trying. Sober. This is like being in school again.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-02 00:47:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
IF YOUR OPPONENT HASN"T GOT YOU A TITLE BY NOW, EITHER USE YOUR OWN OR CONTACT ME FOR ONE.
Submitted by NintendoCzar (user info) at 2007-10-01 22:46:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Zamprano, enjoy:
Sin & Punishment
or
Water Closet
or
The Perfect Partner
PS I don't know if I say what one of yours I'm choosing, so that's why I didn't. Don't know if it matters......
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2007-10-01 22:42:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sorry for the late titles:
necrophilia: a how-to guide
smooth things over
right shoes
one last thing on the list
a story for sara jane davis
i apologize for the shitness, feel free to pick your own (and yes, that first one is a serious submission, it makes me giggle)
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-10-01 21:49:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Mister Cowman I suggest to you the titles of
Devil's Eyes
In the Shadow
Full Moon's Blessing
OR
Feel free to make up your own as I'm notoriously bad at tittling - er, titling things.
Submitted by mockidol (user info) at 2007-10-01 21:39:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Attn: Amontillado
(Your Choice)
Pocket Thistle
The Meadow Grey
Anxiety Seperation
Noir Nephilim
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2007-10-01 20:59:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-10-01 19:02:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-10-01 10:54:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hang on, theres not many women in this competition, fingers crossed for a Lungfish victory!
------
GAH!!!!
ilikesteak -- I like it.
Amontillado -- You can have me anytime you want.
Fuck. I have to write something.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What the FUCK?
Since when was lungfish a chick? I thought you were the camping guy in the hat wearing the red thing. You know, the one with a shotgun and a can of beans in the picture? That's not you?
I've thought that was you for a good part of a year now.
Good luck in the next round anyway, as I'm bound to lose this one.
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-10-01 20:56:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I want to write about a demented monkey with a superhero power.
Submitted by YELLOW-MAN (user info) at 2007-10-01 20:21:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wow, I don't like these odds, Big Mike of all people. (not being sarcastic) but here it goes.. potential titles, and if these don't entice you, by all means make up your own.
"Love Psalm"
"The Years Without Light."
"Speed of Pain"
"Moonlight City Drive"
"Silent Film"
"Murderers Muse"
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2007-10-01 20:21:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:36:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've already decided that whiskey_jack is going to win.
pack your bags folks, move along, no reason to be here anymore....
****************
I will if we get points for look and charm!
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2007-10-01 19:56:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2007-10-01 10:45:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
..you did it and I'm just pointing it out and I'll just keep doing so until I feel like moving on.
***
atta boy!
Submitted by Zampano (user info) at 2007-10-01 19:44:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
All right NintendoCzar, if you're up for it, here you go:
'Day Eight In The Heart Of The Earth'
'The Lonely Isle'
'Madness Blinks An Eye'
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-10-01 19:02:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-10-01 10:54:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hang on, theres not many women in this competition, fingers crossed for a Lungfish victory!
------
GAH!!!!
ilikesteak -- I like it.
Amontillado -- You can have me anytime you want.
Fuck. I have to write something.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-10-01 19:01:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Here's the title for my opponent:
'Farts Come In Many Colors'
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-10-01 18:52:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Whiskey Jack... take your pick... erm...
The Digest of Knowledge
I've always been Partial to Roses (Feel free to substitute for the pronoun)
Don't Move, Don't Breathe
----
yeah if you hate these I'll come up with something else. Good Luck.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-10-01 18:33:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:19:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jeannee, I don't know if I should run with this or FROM this... I must tell you that you should exercise extreme caution when opening this link especially if you are the queasy type and/or pro-life.
NSFW
WARNING, EXTREMELY GRAPHIC LINK: http://www.hyscience.com/photos/abortion_22_weeks01.jpg
NSFW
--------
eh. I've had ultra-conservative teachers in high school show videos of abortions and shredded fetuses time and time again, it was supposed to make me a pro-lifer but did nothing but desensitize me to abortion. Kinda the opposite effect.
look up Swap.avi. Much worse than anything else.
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2007-10-01 18:31:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm supposed to SUGGEST Ballare's title?
Here is one.
Last Year's Skeleton
There were gonna be three, but, fuck that.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-01 18:27:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
DON"T FORGET TO GIVE YOUR OPPONENT THEIR TITLE!!!
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2007-10-01 18:06:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm up against Ballare?
She's gonna win, but I'm glad I get to compete against her.
Submitted by TechnoRatty (user info) at 2007-10-01 17:12:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hi Inion De Trua,
my apologies in advance for my efforts
(Oh shit what have I done...I is ascared)
______________________________________
Dream I Have
OR
Single White Psychopath
OR
Nobody Is Listening
OR
Through My Eyes
________________________________________
Hope they are ok
XXX
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:45:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No thanks sico... although I'm trying to keep my weight down, so if I overeat at dinner tonight, I might use that link to help me purge.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:36:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've already decided that whiskey_jack is going to win.
pack your bags folks, move along, no reason to be here anymore....
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:19:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jeannee, I don't know if I should run with this or FROM this... I must tell you that you should exercise extreme caution when opening this link especially if you are the queasy type and/or pro-life.
NSFW
WARNING, EXTREMELY GRAPHIC LINK: http://www.hyscience.com/photos/abortion_22_weeks01.jpg
NSFW
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:13:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ShapeShifter - If you're looking for disgusting inspiration, may I suggest that you search somethingawful.com for SWAP.avi. Although a sick fuck like you is probably already intimately familiar with the horrifying saga of SWAP.avi.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:07:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks Ax, I'm sure I can come up with something from one of those titles by Thursday night.
GAME ON
Submitted by ELG (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:06:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey Beer-Turtle,
Last Blue Moon
-Or-
Evening Half-light
-Or-
Tell me to fuck off, whatever.
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:05:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I just found some pictures while searching for inspiration and I was thoroughly disgusted.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:03:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:53:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Or not. I may actually continue with my writing trend. Pardon the outburst.
AXOLOTL: I'll expand your choice of titles from the one before to include a few more, since I'm in a chipper mood today and thought I'd be nice...you may pick and choose from the following. Or do something else entirely if you're not a rules-type person. Whatever floats your boat.
H'orror D'oeuvres Le Sphincter
Sick Sigma
Steezeburger Slaughterhouse
Ba-da Bing, Ba-da BANG!
The Crumpling
---------
hmmm...I have an idea, I'll see if I can use one of your titles.
The titles for you my good man...
"Chain Gang"
"These Black Eyes"
"Taking a Bit of Foreskin With You Up to Jesus"
"The Defleshening"
Or anything else you want if you have a good idea. Rules are meant to be broken into a thousand pieces wtih liquid nitrogen and ground into fine dust.
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:56:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Here's a title for my glorious opponent: "The haunted abortion clinic"
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:50:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sure Forensic
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:45:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
For future reference, may we use song titles to give as our title suggestions?
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:32:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I WIN
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:26:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Just another stupid contest.
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:21:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What's grueberfest?
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:12:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm getting to the point where I'm just going to pick my own tit.
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:01:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yo Beeltea, here are your titles you whorefaced son of a whore's face:
"The Revenge of Cock Robbin"
"Behind Closed Doors"
"Going my way?"
"Killy Von McStabbandmurder III: Footloose in Havana"
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:53:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Or not. I may actually continue with my writing trend. Pardon the outburst.
AXOLOTL: I'll expand your choice of titles from the one before to include a few more, since I'm in a chipper mood today and thought I'd be nice...you may pick and choose from the following. Or do something else entirely if you're not a rules-type person. Whatever floats your boat.
H'orror D'oeuvres Le Sphincter
Sick Sigma
Steezeburger Slaughterhouse
Ba-da Bing, Ba-da BANG!
The Crumpling
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:14:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"I think everyone would appreciate it if the comp was kept inside the genre."
--
I can live with that.
Get rid of Scourge, though. He yelled at me.
And Shlongy is bald. Bald I tell you! Ahahahahaha!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:37:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:14:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Reading upon the last, oh ONE HUNDRED FUCKING REVIEWS or so...
I think everyone would appreciate it if the comp was kept inside the genre.
I don't care if you post images, or songs... but make them SPOOKY images and songs.
=============================
YES!!!! AHAHAHAHAHADROOLDROOOLOHGODYES!@!!!!
*rushes off to record spooky song*
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:37:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Attn: Mockidol
Lab creation
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:31:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
:( I wanted Lungfish.
Submitted by DeadToast (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:21:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Unofficial Non-enrty Linkwhore of Relevancy +3 (+4 vs. Undead)
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112124
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:14:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Reading upon the last, oh ONE HUNDRED FUCKING REVIEWS or so...
I think everyone would appreciate it if the comp was kept inside the genre.
I don't care if you post images, or songs... but make them SPOOKY images and songs.
Are you "Drunk With Flowers Stuck Out Of Your Asshole?" - fine: but photoshop yourself all dead like and make the flowers DEMONIC!!!
('cause that would actually be kinda funny)
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:07:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Your point being what?
v
v
v
v
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-10-01 14:02:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:59:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Paging fungah to the gruberfest shitbox. FUNGAH!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:55:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:33:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:20:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You ass obessesed fucks should just create your own contest.
ASSFEST 2007!
IT'S ALL ABOUT ASS!
ASS FICTION, ASS PICTURES, AND POEMS ABOUT ASS!
Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass. You goddamn assholes.
Speaking of ass, why don't you kiss my ass, Jack.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/111636
--
I thought I already did, but it turned out to be your bald head.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:44:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
here*
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:44:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
13 - Ballare VS Sir Cowman
---------
Interesting, Ballare is one of the only people on her cowman knows by name. In fact, it's the only writer he ever suggested that I read.
Huh.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:41:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
good point young ghola....
can i assume that maybe Oathmeal and his likes were on the ones making the threat to you?
so if its cool for a dipshit like oathmeal its cool for a 'published author' such as kaos?
you arguement amounts to sqaudoosh because you're comparing proven internet numbskulls to kaos king who, until know, i thought was maybe a good person but even he's saying he went to far.
and yes i'm just pushing buttons....leave me alone.
Submitted by zwerg (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:41:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-10-01 10:09:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is usually the only contest I bother reading.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:35:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:31:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
don't question the almighty KK forensic....he'll curse you'r whole family and wish harm upon them. I've seen it happen
---
Jesus christ, I've had no less than 3 users make similar remarks to me and you don't see me getting my panties in a wad. Fucking Christ. You're just trying to pick on him until he cries, aren't you? AREN'T you? Not that I really care, because it's just the goddamn internet.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:35:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ASSFEST 2007 sounds a great competition.
Battle of the asses. KK get onto it.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:33:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:20:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You ass obessesed fucks should just create your own contest.
ASSFEST 2007!
IT'S ALL ABOUT ASS!
ASS FICTION, ASS PICTURES, AND POEMS ABOUT ASS!
Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass. You goddamn assholes.
Speaking of ass, why don't you kiss my ass, Jack.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/111636
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:31:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
don't question the almighty KK forensic....he'll curse you'r whole family and wish harm upon them. I've seen it happen.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:30:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I bet on four forfeits.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:22:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ye gawds!
Is this contest turning ghey? Again?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:21:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:17:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Probably about the same number as you for being covered in cat hair and smelling of drambuie
--
Shows how much you know. I don't drink, and I own one of those sticky roller things.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:20:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You ass obessesed fucks should just create your own contest.
ASSFEST 2007!
IT'S ALL ABOUT ASS!
ASS FICTION, ASS PICTURES, AND POEMS ABOUT ASS!
Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass. You goddamn assholes.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:18:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Alrighty then! I'll save it for my next opponet (providing I pass round 1)
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:17:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:14:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Tarnished Silver is fine.
Good luck to ye!
BTW KK (and Jack)--
If Jack wants (and no one has given him a title yet), I'll give him a doosey (sp?).
Only one condition, PLEASE don't match him up against me!
--
I have a title, thanks. And it has nothing to do with Scourge's strange ass obsession.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:17:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Probably about the same number as you for being covered in cat hair and smelling of drambuie
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:15:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:50:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No, there aren't, you fucking idiot. This is Ubersite...Not the Nobel Prize nominations, jagoff.
--
I wonder how many beatdowns you avoid by being so tiny and bald and non-threatening?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:14:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Tarnished Silver is fine.
Good luck to ye!
BTW KK (and Jack)--
If Jack wants (and no one has given him a title yet), I'll give him a doosey (sp?).
Only one condition, PLEASE don't match him up against me!
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:14:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I had to have my taint removed because I diddled it too much. Now I just have a ball-asshole interface plate.
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:13:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
taint nerd, below.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:10:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've finished mine but I really dont want to be the first person to post
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:05:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by baronMunchausen (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:03:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Titles for write of way:
Closed Drawer
A Cleaver and a Half
Spiked
or New York in June
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:02:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Necrocode? I guess I'll give it a go. would you like to write from the same title?
if not then use "Tarnished Silver" or tell me they both suck and you wants something else.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:01:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 17:47:35 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:39:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OK so does KK want to provide a rules clarification or will I go ahead and post that picture of me drunk and with flowers stuck in my asshole that Ive already went through all the trouble of taking?
--
Why didn't you save yourself the trouble and borrow one of the thousands of similar pictures taken by your friends on any given Saturday night in the last ten years?
---------
Because those were all fuschias and lupins whereas I wanted an appropriate white lily pic, duh
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:00:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Title: Wheelhouse
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:59:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:50:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112069#2540130
Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you? Get your dosage checked.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:58:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I will probably write a lovely poem.
I hope that doesn't cause problems or give anyone a nosebleed.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:56:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-01 00:40:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hadley, I honestly hope your loved ones die in a horrible manner and you're helpless to save them.
If I knew that happened to you, if I knew you suffered like that... I would smile.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
THAT'S IT? THIS is what people are bitching about? I put an end to this my way.
Hadley, I honestly hope you cause your loved ones die in a horrible manner and you're helpless to stop it.
I want you to be on your way to a family reunion, and have your break cable snap, causing you to collide with your grandmother, then as you crash into the side of your uncle's house, you take out your pregnant cousin and her new husband. I want you to end up a quadraplegic. I want you to know you've been able to kill everyone except yourself.
If I knew that happened to you, if I knew you suffered like that... I would smile.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:51:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:44:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:35:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A reminder...
In the post that began our annual horror fiction contest (before I came up with the ultra-cool title Grueberfest and simply, lamely reffered to it as Frightfest http://www.ubersite.com/m/77243) it is clearly stated that this is a fiction contest. So please, no retarded bullshit. If you aren't going to submit a story with a horror/Halloween/creepy theme, then just drop out now. This is not Ubermadness, where ANY post goes. The whole point of the contest is to read some scary and or horrifically disgusting stories, so don't submit pictures of assholes or flowers and a fucking poem or some demented rant about the last time you got shitfaced.
Thanks.
---
Listen you fucking control freak, this isn't your show, now is it? Get back in the bathroom with Larry Craig.
Now, just to spite you, I'm going to post a retarded bullshit picture of assholes and flowers with a lovely poem about getting shitfaced to accompany it.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Charlton.
--
It was in anticipation of your usual retarded bullshit picture of assholes and flowers with a lovely poem about getting shitfaced that I posted my comment in the first place. I mean, I enjoy some retarded bullshit pictures of assholes and flowers with lovely poems about getting shitfaced as much as the next guy, but thre are limits, man.
-----
WELL, JACK, I WRITE FOR MY AUDIENCE, WHAT CAN I SAY?
NOW QUIT TELLING ME WHAT TO DO.
YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:50:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:44:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:35:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A reminder...
In the post that began our annual horror fiction contest (before I came up with the ultra-cool title Grueberfest and simply, lamely reffered to it as Frightfest http://www.ubersite.com/m/77243) it is clearly stated that this is a fiction contest. So please, no retarded bullshit. If you aren't going to submit a story with a horror/Halloween/creepy theme, then just drop out now. This is not Ubermadness, where ANY post goes. The whole point of the contest is to read some scary and or horrifically disgusting stories, so don't submit pictures of assholes or flowers and a fucking poem or some demented rant about the last time you got shitfaced.
Thanks.
---
Listen you fucking control freak, this isn't your show, now is it? Get back in the bathroom with Larry Craig.
Now, just to spite you, I'm going to post a retarded bullshit picture of assholes and flowers with a lovely poem about getting shitfaced to accompany it.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Charlton.
--
It was in anticipation of your usual retarded bullshit picture of assholes and flowers with a lovely poem about getting shitfaced that I posted my comment in the first place. I mean, I enjoy some retarded bullshit pictures of assholes and flowers with lovely poems about getting shitfaced as much as the next guy, but thre are limits, man.
No, there aren't, you fucking idiot. This is Ubersite...Not the Nobel Prize nominations, jagoff.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:50:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/112069#2540130
Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you? Get your dosage checked.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:49:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
:(
I wanted to participate, even though I'd get slaughtered.
Har, har, punny.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:47:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:39:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OK so does KK want to provide a rules clarification or will I go ahead and post that picture of me drunk and with flowers stuck in my asshole that Ive already went through all the trouble of taking?
--
Why didn't you save yourself the trouble and borrow one of the thousands of similar pictures taken by your friends on any given Saturday night in the last ten years?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:46:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:36:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A reminder...
In the post that began our annual horror fiction contest (before I came up with the ultra-cool title Grueberfest and simply, lamely reffered to it as Frightfest http://www.ubersite.com/m/77243) it is clearly stated that this is a fiction contest. So please, no retarded bullshit. If you aren't going to submit a story with a horror/Halloween/creepy theme, then just drop out now. This is not Ubermadness, where ANY post goes. The whole point of the contest is to read some scary and or horrifically disgusting stories, so don't submit pictures of assholes or flowers and a fucking poem or some demented rant about the last time you got shitfaced.
Thanks.
---
WTF, I'm not reading all that.
Who is?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:45:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
My opponents' title:
Ghola's Magic Box
KNOCK YOURSELF OUT.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:44:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:39:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 17:35:50 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A reminder...
In the post that began our annual horror fiction contest (before I came up with the ultra-cool title Grueberfest and simply, lamely reffered to it as Frightfest http://www.ubersite.com/m/77243) it is clearly stated that this is a fiction contest. So please, no retarded bullshit. If you aren't going to submit a story with a horror/Halloween/creepy theme, then just drop out now. This is not Ubermadness, where ANY post goes. The whole point of the contest is to read some scary and or horrifically disgusting stories, so don't submit pictures of assholes or flowers and a fucking poem or some demented rant about the last time you got shitfaced.
Thanks.
---
Listen you fucking control freak, this isn't your show, now is it? Get back in the bathroom with Larry Craig.
Now, just to spite you, I'm going to post a retarded bullshit picture of assholes and flowers with a lovely poem about getting shitfaced to accompany it.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Charlton.
------------
hahahahahaha!
OK so does KK want to provide a rules clarification or will I go ahead and post that picture of me drunk and with flowers stuck in my asshole that Ive already went through all the trouble of taking?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You said you were only sending that picture to me! You WHORE!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:44:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:35:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A reminder...
In the post that began our annual horror fiction contest (before I came up with the ultra-cool title Grueberfest and simply, lamely reffered to it as Frightfest http://www.ubersite.com/m/77243) it is clearly stated that this is a fiction contest. So please, no retarded bullshit. If you aren't going to submit a story with a horror/Halloween/creepy theme, then just drop out now. This is not Ubermadness, where ANY post goes. The whole point of the contest is to read some scary and or horrifically disgusting stories, so don't submit pictures of assholes or flowers and a fucking poem or some demented rant about the last time you got shitfaced.
Thanks.
---
Listen you fucking control freak, this isn't your show, now is it? Get back in the bathroom with Larry Craig.
Now, just to spite you, I'm going to post a retarded bullshit picture of assholes and flowers with a lovely poem about getting shitfaced to accompany it.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Charlton.
--
It was in anticipation of your usual retarded bullshit picture of assholes and flowers with a lovely poem about getting shitfaced that I posted my comment in the first place. I mean, I enjoy some retarded bullshit pictures of assholes and flowers with lovely poems about getting shitfaced as much as the next guy, but thre are limits, man.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:41:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Orgasmatron, here are three for you to choose from. I like the last one best, but do what you will:
'Worn Down Heels'
'Picture Postcard'
'A Busy Day at Jack's Garage'
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:39:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 17:35:50 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A reminder...
In the post that began our annual horror fiction contest (before I came up with the ultra-cool title Grueberfest and simply, lamely reffered to it as Frightfest http://www.ubersite.com/m/77243) it is clearly stated that this is a fiction contest. So please, no retarded bullshit. If you aren't going to submit a story with a horror/Halloween/creepy theme, then just drop out now. This is not Ubermadness, where ANY post goes. The whole point of the contest is to read some scary and or horrifically disgusting stories, so don't submit pictures of assholes or flowers and a fucking poem or some demented rant about the last time you got shitfaced.
Thanks.
---
Listen you fucking control freak, this isn't your show, now is it? Get back in the bathroom with Larry Craig.
Now, just to spite you, I'm going to post a retarded bullshit picture of assholes and flowers with a lovely poem about getting shitfaced to accompany it.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Charlton.
------------
hahahahahaha!
OK so does KK want to provide a rules clarification or will I go ahead and post that picture of me drunk and with flowers stuck in my asshole that Ive already went through all the trouble of taking?
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:36:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A reminder...
In the post that began our annual horror fiction contest (before I came up with the ultra-cool title Grueberfest and simply, lamely reffered to it as Frightfest http://www.ubersite.com/m/77243) it is clearly stated that this is a fiction contest. So please, no retarded bullshit. If you aren't going to submit a story with a horror/Halloween/creepy theme, then just drop out now. This is not Ubermadness, where ANY post goes. The whole point of the contest is to read some scary and or horrifically disgusting stories, so don't submit pictures of assholes or flowers and a fucking poem or some demented rant about the last time you got shitfaced.
Thanks.
---
WTF, I'm not reading all that.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:35:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A reminder...
In the post that began our annual horror fiction contest (before I came up with the ultra-cool title Grueberfest and simply, lamely reffered to it as Frightfest http://www.ubersite.com/m/77243) it is clearly stated that this is a fiction contest. So please, no retarded bullshit. If you aren't going to submit a story with a horror/Halloween/creepy theme, then just drop out now. This is not Ubermadness, where ANY post goes. The whole point of the contest is to read some scary and or horrifically disgusting stories, so don't submit pictures of assholes or flowers and a fucking poem or some demented rant about the last time you got shitfaced.
Thanks.
---
Listen you fucking control freak, this isn't your show, now is it? Get back in the bathroom with Larry Craig.
Now, just to spite you, I'm going to post a retarded bullshit picture of assholes and flowers with a lovely poem about getting shitfaced to accompany it.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Charlton.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:33:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Adolf McCallum
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:31:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-10-01 11:28:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Being paired against someone Ive actually heard of is a bad sign.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Least you have a chance. I've got no idea how to write, especially not writing within a subject genera. You've seen how I fuck up every competition I'm in. Poetry, action-adventure, epistolary, and now "horror."
If I can't think of anything, I'm posting clown porn. Horrible childhood memories being associated with sex might scar enough people to get me through the next round, but after that, I'm hopeless.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A reminder...
In the post that began our annual horror fiction contest (before I came up with the ultra-cool title Grueberfest and simply, lamely reffered to it as Frightfest http://www.ubersite.com/m/77243) it is clearly stated that this is a fiction contest. So please, no retarded bullshit. If you aren't going to submit a story with a horror/Halloween/creepy theme, then just drop out now. This is not Ubermadness, where ANY post goes. The whole point of the contest is to read some scary and or horrifically disgusting stories, so don't submit pictures of assholes or flowers and a fucking poem or some demented rant about the last time you got shitfaced.
Thanks.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:22:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
how about:
How Gruberfest Killed Crystle
Submitted by write-of-way (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:21:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ATTN: BaronMunchausen
Titles:
The Long Fall
Down the Shitter
After The Wedding
Or you can make them into one long title.
Or you can write whatever you'd like and title it appropriately.
No worries.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:21:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate gruberfest.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:19:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lungfish, that's a badass title, and as per my usual, I'll fuck it up somehow, but damned if I won't try to get it right.
Your title will be "What Lies Beneath" because everybody's afraid of being pulled under by something. It's all inclusive, and a similarly awesome title.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:19:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll tell you what, scourge, you give me your take on white trash neighbors, homosexual and immigrants and I'll see what I can tell you about politics, rights and manipulating a cat's gland through its asshole for health reasons.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:16:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i agree orgasmo...but jack says we can only talk about what he wants or else he'll take his ball and go home.
so... how do you feel about cats and republicans and civil liberties?
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:15:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
go sox and all that.
but the PATRIOTS ARE ON TONIGHT!!!!!!!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:09:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Manny Ramirez looks like a dumpy garbage man, especially in the gray away uniforms.
He'd look like one anyway given how the clothes hang on him, but the long hair only adds to the look.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:08:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Heres a title for someone
'Bride of EmissionImpossible'
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:06:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-10-01 10:15:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Brdn Nkd-how's about
Necrocode
for your title?
--
*grimaces, fills with rage and jealousy*
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:06:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Blistered is acceptable.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:03:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Guys, lets have some workable titles or this contest will just go down the shitter.
monkeyswithguns, your title is 'Blistered.' If you think it really blows, I'll suggest another.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 12:00:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh, okay.
let me think of a few and i'll put them up later.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-10-01 11:59:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
answer my fucking question.
if the answer is yes, orgasmatron's title is:
"the spooky adventures of a sexually ambiguous poet who spends his free time cheering for men call