I'm pissed so don't expect this to be any good (846 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.35 on 32 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by StereoTypist (View user info) at 2007-10-01 15:44:48 EDT
My name is Jani and I am a product of white trash. There, I said it. The truth of the matter is I was born and raised in a low-income family and there was little I could do about it other than attempt to steer clear of all of the stereotypes people like me and my family are victim to. Of course the majority of the white-trash is on my father's side but for the most part they do a good job in their avoidance of being typecast as white trash. None are on Welfare, or other pubic assistance programs, all of them work to support their families and none have given birth to children while they themselves could still be classified as children.
However - on my mother's side of the family, the privileged side where one aunt and uncle own a boat marina worth an estimated 2.5 million dollars, one particular cousin is determined to show the world the full trashyness of her whiteness.
At 19 my cousin Stephanie, who lives in Florida, thought it would be a good idea to get herself pregnant like all of the other hick-skanks down there so they could have play dates or whatever. She found the least educated man with less of a future than Tupac and declared her undying love for the man-boy (This guy, also under 21, is twice divorced and has two other children with his 2 ex-wives. Moving on..)
So they boinked. And boinked. And boinked and boinked and boinked. And after all of the boinking came a daughter. Sadly, however, my cousin didn't realize that having a child is not ALL fun and games and would constantly leave said baby with her parents, go out to party, and not come home for days at a time.
Finally my aunt and uncle did what needed to be done. They put their foot down and told my cousin to shape up, get out and to leave the baby.
Stephanie gets visitation rights with the kid and is, as of now, practically homeless and staying with friends and doing the "couch surfing" thing since her boyfriend is an unemployed tattoo artist who is also homeless. But it's "aight". She's got her baby's daddy to keep her warm at night. And keep her warm he has: My cousin is pregnant AGAIN.
How did I find this out you ask? By a wonderful little email she decided to send out to her friends and family members.
..> Date: Oct 1, 2007 1:48 PM
Subject: for who everywhat to kno
Body: YES IM PREGNANT AGAIN AN IM HAPPY SO SAY WHAT EVEY U WANT I DONT GIVE A SHIT....IM TIRED OF EVERY ONE SAYIN IM CRAZY OR IM MAKING A MISTAKE OR WHAT EVERY I GOT THE GUY IM GOIN GTO MARRY IN 2 MONTHS N ARE DAUGHTER SO EVERYONE STAY THE FUCK OUT OF MY BUNIESS..>
End scene.
I of course then had to check out her Myspace page to confirm this fact and, sure enough, there was one of those annoying "this-many-days-until-I-give-birth" counters, some sonogram pictures and a bunch of comments from random redneck tramp friends of hers (all in their teens mind you) declaring their support for her. My favorite one was from a 17 year old hillbilly whore who told my cousin that she was a "Good mother" and was "Old enough to make her own decisions".
Excuse me while I laugh at that.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
:::sniffle:::
Ahem...
Let me put it to you this way friends: There are a lot of arguments that can be made about someone being a good or bad mother. My girlfriends Lina, Emily, Carol, Sam and Jolene get called bad mothers all the time by stupid ass people who feel that THEY would do a better job (Side note: Fuck you people). But I think we can all agree that one thing can be a standard characteristic of a bad mother and that is this:
IF YOU DON'T HAVE FUCKING CUSTODY OF YOUR OWN FUCKING KID YOU ARE A BAD MOTHER!
What is it going to take to make you Wal-Mart wearing, squirrel eating, baby having, Dale Earnhardt mourning pieces of shit understand that just because you CAN have a baby does NOT mean you are anywhere near adulthood and able to make rational decisions concerning your or a child's life?
So I have this advice to my dear cousin who will probably read this and chat with her boyfriend and her friends about how much of a bitch I am and say things like "How dare she judge me - she don't know me!" (or more accurately and judging by that oh-so-eloquent bulletin she posted, has someone read it TO her and then bitch about it):
Sit down tomorrow morning after waking up from your alcohol binge on your friends couch and turn on the television. Light up your morning cigarette, take a drag and put on Jerry Springer. Laugh at the antics of those "stupid hoes" who are talking like idiots and embarrassing not only themselves but their families and keep this in mind: What YOU'RE doing is nothing different than what THEY are doing. All that's missing is a TV camera and Mr. Springer himself.
User Reviews
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2007-10-05 15:22:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Wal-Mart wearing, squirrel eating, baby having, Dale Earnhardt mourning pieces of shit...
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Living up to your name I see. I am wearing a pair of Wal-Mart shorts right now, and I mourned the loss of Dale Earnhardt. I work on nuclear weapons for a living, so why am i offended? Hmmm dunno
Ah Fuckit
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2007-10-03 13:27:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
All that's missing is a TV camera and Mr. Springer himself.
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He was the mayor when I was born. Just and FYI.
Submitted by Surgeon (user info) at 2007-10-02 14:07:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
dehiscence..
Submitted by SilvrWolf (user info) at 2007-10-02 11:10:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
This hurt my eyes.
And please don't rant on about the ignorance and stupidity of others unless your grammar is near-perfect. Eloquence and articulation are essential if you're going to act like you're better than someone else.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2007-10-02 10:35:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm entwined in a similar situation... but the girl I know says, "I'm not going to let anyone take THIS baby away!". Like, "Oh well, I lost the first one, but try try again!" It is very frustrating to deal with ignorant people like that.
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-10-02 09:22:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
We lived for a while in a small town where teenage pregnancies were extremely common. I still dream of the t-shirt I never had printed, "I want to get pregnant so I'll fit in at school."
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-10-02 09:08:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't think this was nearly as bad as it's made out to be.... it's kind of an ammusing rant.
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2007-10-02 08:25:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This reminds me of my cousin (who is male) who got his 300lb girlfriend preggers. She bottle feeds her baby so she can continue to drink/smoke while being unemployed. Why is Florida a breeding ground for white trash? And why in Florida does every car, no matter how shitty, have gold 20" rims? The world may never know.
Submitted by Empathetic (user info) at 2007-10-02 08:04:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
If I cared about the white trash "culture", I'd watch Springer and Judge Judy.
Submitted by ArnieGeddon (user info) at 2007-10-02 08:03:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"just because you CAN have a baby does NOT mean you are anywhere near adulthood..."
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tell me about it.
*frowns*
*goes to say something*
*screws up nose in a this looks bad for me fashion*
*frowns again*
stuff you n00b.
Submitted by Progr3ss (user info) at 2007-10-02 07:26:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I didn't expect it to be good, but I did expect it to be bad. Fuck off now alter.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-10-02 03:21:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Jani from the block.
Your cousin does sound like a useless bitch.
However, just for the record... I think you can get bad mothers both young and old. Age, upbringing etc is often not a factor in a childs quality of life. Even folk on the breadline can raise well rounded and successful humans.
Also sometimes factors beyond a parents control often mean their offspring have to be taken into care - say through illness. Sometimes putting your child in the hands of social services is the only solution a parent has and to DO so must be an immensley hard choice.
It is all very well banging on about bad mothers but what about the fathers? It takes 2 people to make a baby.
I think your cousins parents are also partly responsible for her situation. She obviously has no ambition, self respect and is very immature.
When I had my first son we where very poor despite us having jobs but we worked hard for years to better ourselves and now own our home and can afford lifes luxuries. We could have easily chosen to live in a council house and get paid welfare but the way WE were bought up made us want more for our children and ourselves.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-10-02 01:40:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Not a bad post
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2007-10-01 23:27:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
White trash? You look Middle Eastern.
Submitted by DeMoNiC (user info) at 2007-10-01 22:44:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Wal-Mart wearing, squirrel eating, baby having, Dale Earnhardt mourning pieces of shit".
That was good. I shall go againt the general consensus of this post and say I enjoyed the read and particularly that line - +2 all the way.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2007-10-01 21:59:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I've read all your stuff and I'll tell that it doesn't matter what mood you're in; I don't expect it to be any good. But on the plus side, you have met your expectations so you can feel good about that.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-10-01 19:48:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-10-01 13:11:34 PDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Say goodbye to your little post!
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DENIED.
Submitted by lechuza (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:21:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
people that stupid should be sterilized
Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:13:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
She did mention that she is of white trash descent. Have you seen recent .jpegs of her Shlongy, I'd advise securing a few nudes w/ her holding a piece of tagboard that says 'Shlongy for Prez!' or something as verification that its her, before attempting to make a hefty deposit in her bank.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:11:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
My name is CaptainThorns and I am a product of binary numbers...there, I said it.
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:11:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Say goodbye to your little post!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:01:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Enough about her...let's talk about me slamming YOUR ass until YOU become pregnant.
I have money. It's a good offer.
Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-10-01 16:00:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was actually pretty funny. I sympathize with almost all of it. Plenty of dumb broads in my neck of the woods who do the same thing.
You know what my favorite thing about the giant verge of implosion vortex of hypocrisy that we call 'woman' is?
When they call each other bitch whore skank slut tramp etc, and the truth of the matter is, just this weekend past they put down a bottle with their friends and took it from behind like a dog.
I can't even count how many times I've been in public settings and listen to girls shit talk some other idiot who isn't present to defend herself, about what a slut she is because she had sex one weekend. When come to find out, the dumbass talking shit about her, slutted around with 4 different dudes over the course of a week and a half.
Fucking incredible....
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:58:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm from white-trash stock also.
In addition to that revealing factoid, if this is your normal style of writing, I would suggest keeping your typewriter locked away and just stick to posting pictures of your wonderful cleavage.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:56:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wal-Mart wearing, squirrel eating, baby having, Dale Earnhardt mourning pieces of shit.
CRACK!!
it's going....going.....gone!
+2 for that line alone
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:56:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:56:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:53:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:53:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Well, that sucked.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:53:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This could have been summed up with the following sentance.
Just because you can have children, doesn't mean you should have children.
Next time, leave out the personal life, because it bores me.
Submitted by StereoTypist (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:49:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think I love you.
_______________________________________________________________
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:46:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You told me it wasn't going to be good so you couldn't possibly expect me to spend time to actually read something the author deems shitty, can you?!
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2007-10-01 15:46:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You told me it wasn't going to be good so you couldn't possibly expect me to spend time to actually read something the author deems shitty, can you?!