Gardeners #1: The Show (362 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.55 on 12 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by stardamage (View user info) at 2007-10-11 11:42:14 EDT
Aster is fiddling with the ticket in his pocket, the edges bent a little from the pressure of his fingers. His pants are a little tight - whoever bought them new off the shelf in the seventies must have been a stick. He shuffles a little to straighten out his cuffs, which are neatly folded up at the bottom to keep them out of the dust.
Heather is a little behind him, digging in her bag. "Babe, have you seen my ticket? I don't have it..."
Aster wordlessly hands her ticket over and she kisses his cheek. Dozens, hundreds of other people are making their way across the huge parking lot. Whispers filter furtively out from between a pair of cars parked suspiciously close together; a girl with too-straight hair emerges after a cloud of smoke and, laughing, makes for the entrance. She slips a pair of sunglasses on ( "shit, those look like aves from back in the day, huh?" notes Heather admiringly) while her friends shout after her.
"Holly! Hey!"
"You knoooooow it!"
"Dang, man, that was doggish," a lower voice floats by, a snicker following.
Holly turns and gestures rudely, still laughing. Aster watches as she reaches the gates, hands her ticket over to the attendant, takes off her sunglasses at his request. He waves a metal wand in front of her face and then over the ticket; it beeps and he hands it back to her, and she disappears into the mass of people.
"Aw, they got the IR scanners out," Heather complains.
"Yeah, I guess this show's supposed to be sold out so they amped up the security," Aster replies. He brushes his bangs back from his face. "I guess some of the California crowd is here, too."
"Really? That's so inky that they'd get tickets when some of us couldn't."
"Nah, it makes sense to get some of the bigger groups involved. Besides, wouldn't you want to have access to some of their views? I hear the Runaground got some really fresh Who 'cords, showing this winter maybe." Aster rubs at a smudge on his jeans, licks his thumb, rubs it again.
"Really?"
"So I hear."
"Still, too bad Fern had to miss out."
"Yeah."
Heather's looking around, scanning the crowd for friends. She lifts her feet carefully; her moccasins are stapled at the soles. She stumbles, catches herself.
"Kinda wish I didn't wear these," she remarks, looking down at her feet and kicking at the ground. "But I had to, you know?"
"If not in Zeppelin crowd, then where?"
"Exactly. Ooh, there's Peter."
Peter dodges around a group of girls and glances back over his shoulder as he saunters up to them.
"Hey Pete, how was your trip up?"
"Sunny. Hey, Heather. Fresh kicks." He's tucking a hand-rolled cigarette behind his ear, taking out a little tin with more tobacco and rolling another.
"Thanks." She's eyeing the tin.
"Where'd ya get 'em?" He gestures with his chin.
"Picked em up last month in NB. They had a huge hole when I got em though." Heather wiggles her left foot demonstratively.
"Jeez, is that fencing staple?"
"Yeah, I had some extra from fixing my trellises."
"Better not let the fuzz see you with those." Peter waves his hands. "Wooooo."
"Yet another reason to only wear them here."
"Come on," Aster breaks in. "Like anyone's gonna make a fuss over a few fencing staples."
"You'd be surprised, man," Peter replies. "Judy got a 'harsh warning' last week for using a few pounds of soil to grow her fuckin' mums. That's why she's not here, she hadda spend this weekend rippin' em up and getting some more tomatoes in."
"That's bogus."
"Seriously." Peter lights his cigarette, blows a stream of smoke.
"You waiting for anyone else?"
"Nope. Let's get in there."
They walk to the back of the growing line. Dust is everywhere, blown up in a brown mist from the roads. "Fuckin' A, man," Aster says, shielding his eyes from the thick wind. "How you afford that back-up?" He eyes the cigarette behind Peter's ear enviously.
"It costs a pretty penny, my friend," Peter replies. "Want a drag?"
Aster takes it, inhales. "Good stuff," he coughs. "No grass in it?"
"Nah. I like mine uncut. This here is special-occasion shit. Had to talk to some of my friends in class B and even then it took a bit of jing."
"Damn." Aster thinks of his dwindling bank account, the coming winter. "Wish I could swing that."
"Well, if you still want some come sunny spring, you let me know," Peter replies. "I could maybe hook you up."
"Yeah, if only."
The line grows behind them, shrinks before them. Heather hands over her ticket and opens her eyes wide. She blinks a little indignantly as the wand passes across her face and snatches her ticket back, tucking it carefully into her wallet. Aster watches her rummage in her bag, waiting for Peter. He joins them and Aster takes Heather's elbow. "Hey, foxy, you ready to go?"
"Sure." Heather frowns into her bag for another second then turns a warm smile to Aster. "We're in D8."
"Where are you off to, Pete?"
"F4, but I think I'll hang with you if that's okay."
"What the hell, man, you got a better seat, what do you want to wilt around with us for?" Aster asks.
"What, you need some alone time or something? I'd just rather sit with you folks, if you don't mind."
"Not at all, just wondering why you're not hanging out with your cats," Heather breaks in.
"Can't stand up with those fine gentlemen," Peter says, an edge of disdain creeping into his voice. "They all got fresh vintage threads and smooth smokes and that's all they want to talk about. I'd rather chill with you. Why are you arguing, anyway? You know I'm gonna share."
"Not arguing. Just asking. Sure it's fine. Just seems like a waste of a good seat, that's all."
Peter shrugs and swings his hips sideways to slide past a girl with waist-length blond hair. "Hey, sunshine, where's your seat?" he calls back.
She turns; her blue eyes are bloodshot.
"I've got F4, where's yours?" he repeats.
"G6," she replies a little uncertainly.
"Here," he says. "Gimme it."
"What?"
He holds out his ticket. "Give me your ticket, smokey." He's smiling gently.
"You serious?"
"Here, you'll enjoy this seat way more than I will." Peter takes the ticket from her hand and replaces it with his own. "I'm sitting with these cats anyway, I don't need it."
"Thanks!"
"Not wasted, see?" Peter says brightly to Aster as the girl wanders away.
"You're wilted in the pot," Heather remarks, shaking her head.
"Let's go sit."
**
This is just the start of something I've had banging around in my head for a while. Let me know what you think.
User Reviews
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-10-12 09:08:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Fence-sitting on this...do part two, though.
Submitted by Fatterrific (user info) at 2007-10-12 00:23:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Works for me. I probably would have given a shitty rating if it ended where it did, but since you explained that it's only the start, it seems like it has potential.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-10-11 15:36:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
thanks for taking back Uber
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-10-11 13:15:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I enjoyed it but am a little confused, perhaps that'll come round with part 2. you post it I'll read it.
Submitted by stardamage (user info) at 2007-10-11 13:04:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fear not, the slang will make sense later. This is going somewhere. I think.
Anyway, glad to hear that at least some people are somewhat looking forward to part 2. Glad also to see some familiar names around...it's been a while.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-10-11 12:55:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by pshuu (user info) at 2007-10-11 12:26:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm ready for part 2. The dialogue so far seems a little undeveloped and rushed, like the lines in a british comedy. I almost want to laugh at it because the pace is so quick... but I think it's supposed to be semi-serious. You could have just as easily consolidated the whole of part one into a descriptive paragraph. But at the same time, you would have missed out on using key details like the mocassin, 'grass', and Zeppelin bits. I'm not sure you would have been able to convey the cultural idiosyncrasies without elaborating. I can't really judge based on this part one, whether i'll like the rest of the series. +1 for a decent beginning.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-10-11 12:09:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Woah... stardamage.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2007-10-11 12:06:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's good I guess, I've never like those things where half the point of it is its use of made up slang. I liked that whole Pollen thing by whats his name with the constant references to vert and dog men and all so I'd probably be a hypocrite of some kind if I didn't rate this positivly.
Just don't go too silly, y'hear?
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-10-11 11:54:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
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Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-10-11 11:54:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-10-11 11:46:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Not sure what I think, yet. Let's see part two.