You Walrus Hurt The One You Love (623 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.55 on 20 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Oscar Z Acosta (View user info) at 2007-11-27 10:07:32 EST
It's like fucking Vietnam down there man. The aftermath of that plane crash, fucking wiped half the ocean out. It was an L19 reconnaissance plane. Hell it was there to identify targets, Sergeant Squid relaying coordinates for positioning of air strikes by fighter bombers and Basra Barracuda on a helicopter gun ship. They had all been trained by the United States Office of Strategic Fishes.
You have to watch those fucking devious fishies. They are fucking evil, aquatic vertebrates covered with scales, and equipped with two sets of paired fins and several unpaired fins. Lurking in the deepest depths of the ocean. They have revolted, turned against each other after being exploited for recreation, through angling and fish keeping, turning on their telly's and seeing their buddies being sliced up in some kinda sick terrorist promotion. Other fish commonly exhibited in public aquaria, even being made into religious symbols to subjects of books and popular movies. It got too much. They went fucking mad, had all kinda meetings about it and decided there must be a leak, a confident to the outside world.
One Sea snake accused a Sword Fish he screamed at cichlids and one by one the fish turned against each other. Tuna guerrillas attacking the compound at the rock behind the discarded umbrella, killing eight squids , wounding 126 and destroying ten light squid aircraft. General Jimmy Plaice requested two battalions of eels to protect the air base. It was all going off; rocks were being fled in acts of pure desperation.
After several attacks, it was decided that more protection was needed. The military seemed incapable of providing security. And so we have it, barracudas falling every second but just wait you haven't seen anything yet.... the North Atlantic stock of Gadus morhua's are soon to arrive and that will blow your fucking mind.
The fish wars will keep coming.
Remember them in your dreams and next time you pop into your takeaway and see that cod lying there, cross your heart and imagine the troubles that go on in the Ocean. Families are being destroyed and hearts broken.
User Reviews
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-11-28 13:59:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-11-28 13:59:40 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2007-11-28 12:46:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Seriously, dude?
If this was written to make some kind of statement, then you failed.
Submitted by OscarZAcosta (user info) at 2007-11-28 07:28:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This is a fucking story of whats going down dudes, fuck me where you all looking homies
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2007-11-27 22:01:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Is your title an allusion to B. Kliban ?
Also, your story was silly.
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-11-27 21:13:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
You need help.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-11-27 15:36:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
you suck
Submitted by triangle_man (user info) at 2007-11-27 13:12:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Polar Puns
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-11-27 13:08:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oscvaqr is the man.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-11-27 12:55:08 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
If this is funny, my spam filter is a laugh-a-second riot.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-11-27 12:51:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
coo coo ca choo?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-11-27 12:45:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I am the eggman
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-11-27 12:43:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It is worrying when stuff like this actually makes sense.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-11-27 12:18:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
one and one and one is three
got to be good lookin'
'cause he's so hard to see
Submitted by livEvil (user info) at 2007-11-27 11:22:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Mr. Grouch, I can't say i'm impressed.
I'm certainly not disappointed either.
+1 Live.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2007-11-27 10:35:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
There's something fishy about this.
You must have made this post for the halibut.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-11-27 10:30:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Mad.
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-11-27 10:12:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Um, what?
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-11-27 10:11:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What the hell? Enjoyable.
Submitted by DeadToast (user info) at 2007-11-27 10:09:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Another classic example of why "Mad Libs" is fucking retarded.