Rita in the Elevator: Part 2 of 2 (1064 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.73 on 39 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by QuinnTheEskimo (View user info) at 2007-11-30 22:04:20 EST
"Well, I'll see you later, Charles." Rick said, and we shook hands as he stepped off the elevator onto the ground floor.
"Yeah, Rick. I'll see you tomorrow." I reached over to close the elevator doors and end the conversation as quickly as possible.
Rick shook his head. "No, you won't." He said, and winked. His wink bothered me. I've never felt comfortable when another man winks at me. The wink, to me, has always had sexual undertones. "I think I'm gonna be sick tomorrow, son's birthday." Then he gave two fake coughs.
"Well, I'll see you eventually, Rick. I forgot my jacket back upstairs." I pushed the button for the third floor, the elevator doors shut, and Rick was gone from sight. I kicked myself for forgetting my coat. It seemed every winter there was about a week long period that I'd leave my coat here and there since I hadn't needed one since last winter and had fallen out of the habit of remembering it.
When I reached my floor I made a beeline for my workspace. I worked in a call center on the second floor of a three story building and spent most of my day at a long, partitioned table with about fourteen other people fielding customer complaints. I grabbed my coat where it was hanging on the back of my chair, and then pulled it on, carefully buttoning it up. I saw that I had forgotten my gloves and grabbed those, too.
I pushed the elevator button, summoning it to my floor. When the mirrored doors slid open there was a woman standing there dressed in business attire and wearing a giant purse. I asked her "Going down?"
"Yep." She chirped. I stepped in and gave her a polite smile.
There was a moment of silence as the elevator dropped, humming us ten feet down an empty tube. There was a ding letting us know we had stopped and the woman rocked on her heels once then turned to face me.
"How have you been?" She asked, smiling broadly at me.
I blinked."What?" I asked. I gave her a confused smile that said, "Surely we don't know each other well enough to require some kind of idiotic small talk."
"You're Charles Callahan, right? It's me, Rita. We knew each other in college, mostly."
And then I recognized her. Her coat was gone, as was any chance I might have had of seeing her breasts. She was modestly dressed in pair of gray slacks and a brown suede coat. Her edge, the craziness that I once sensed, and had once scared me, was gone. She seemed like any other middle-aged woman that I might see at a restaurant or at the mall. Maybe she'd had a baby or smoked, because she looked a little older than she should.
"I remember. We were friends through Alex." Which was almost true, but also unfair. Alex may have introduced us, but we were friends even after Alex dropped out and joined the Peace Corps.
"I kind of thought we were simply friends." She shrugged, and her tone suggested hurt feelings.
We both stepped off the elevator and stood, staring at each other, unsure if the conversation would end. Rita opened her mouth to say goodbye but I spoke first.
"Do you work here?" I asked. "I haven't seen you before."
"No. I was doing some training for the company that leases the third floor." She held up what I thought was a purse and I realized it was actually a laptop case. I pointed to the door, she nodded, and we both stepped out into the snow evening.
"They do something with loans right? They're called like Rich Uncle?" I could see my breath in thick white cloud.
"Uncle Richie Inc. Isn't that a ridiculous name?" Her breath makes a smaller, fainter cloud.
I nodded. I had thought about Rita from time to time since college, always with a pang of regret and remorse. I had decided long ago that if I ever got another chance with her, no matter how slim, I'd jump on it without holding back.
"Hey, Rita, want to go somewhere? Maybe just for coffee and pie, to catch up on old times? Nowhere exotic. I've missed you, sometimes."
Rita looked at me, her face hard to read. I offered a toothy, goofy grin and a thumbs-up. She dropped her eyes to the floor.
"Oh, Chuck-" She started, but her tone was familiar. It was too late for her to correct herself and go with me. I notice her crooked canine has been fixed.
"You fixed your tooth." I said.
"It's just-"
I interrupted her with a shrug and said: "Hey, some other time."
User Reviews
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2009-04-27 17:34:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fey be best one first fan!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-01-10 20:50:18 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
vastly overrated
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-12-03 13:44:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-12-03 11:23:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i didn't like this as much as the first. where in the hell do you live that a black bear and a grizzly could be found at the same site?
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2007-12-03 07:16:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not bad. It's fell swoop, down below.
Submitted by jared.melton (user info) at 2007-12-03 04:22:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-12-02 16:52:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
NICELY DONE
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2007-12-02 04:21:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I finally took the time to read ballare's and EI's comments on this.
You guys are fucking ridiculous.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-12-02 02:10:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by heyzues (user info) at 2007-12-01 14:35:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for the story and +100 for the reviews
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:48:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
no a chicken got involved hence the fowl.
--------------
I busted a nut when I read this.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-12-01 11:36:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I enjoy elevators.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-12-01 06:08:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You didn't account for the pretzel bearing fruit bats, who when gliding down to your beasts would drop the pretzels in unison. Burying them all within a savoury heaven. Enabling me to leap to safety but not before ripping off every ear and nose in site. Therefore meaning when all the animals escaped the pretzel cavern they could not locate me through smell or sound.
mwhahaha
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 06:04:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
speaking of water buffalo in africa it is day time and there is a streaming webcam at http://www.africam.com/ and you can see them right now walking around in some bushes
I'm watching them
look at them go
tee hee
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 06:03:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The pandas would be mauled by a herd of stampeding water buffalos, all of which would bear screeching torch-wielding orangutans who would set fire to all the dried grasses and the tinderlike bark of the trees and you and the parrots and the hawks and the pandas and everything else trampled underfoot would all be surrounded by a terrible raging bushfire but the orangutans of course can leap over it being quite agile creatures I suppose while everything else crisps up like a roasted chicken
you would die an epic death though
actually once I came across a downed power line and there was a black bear, a coyote, and a grizzly bear, the first of which had been electrocuted by the line and the second which tried to eat the first and was also shocked to death and the third being rather dull tried to consume the first two and was also electrofried
there was fur EVERYWHERE
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:56:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The battle would then take a turn for the better when a parrot would swoop down and carry your dirty chow chow out of the battle field and drop it over a burning bridge, there he would be stranded and burn, burn like a marshmallow.
Then the parading pandas would come to my aid with bamboo in hand.swooshing all and sundry.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:51:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And a great eagle would swoop down and peck out your monkey eyes but then a mongoose would appear and I hear they're quite dangerous, as well as wolverines, and today I looked up the dog breed of chow-chow which I previously knew nothing about and apparently they're one of the most likely breeds to turn against their owners, vicious little things, so then a chow-chow would be all, NOT TODAY MONGOOSE! and rip off his head
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:48:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
no a chicken got involved hence the fowl.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:47:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
one foul swoop**
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:46:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If I could be an animal I would be a monkey and perish in a stick battle with a polar bear. The polar bear would start favourite but I would bash him on the nose with my big stick. Then like a ninja I would leap and in true matrix stle the whole battle would slow down and Mr Polar Bear would rip my heart out in one fowl swoop. aaaarrrgh hear me make painful monkey noises.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:43:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I CAN SEE HIS INSIDES
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:42:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That's wicked
I'd want to freeze to death, you know just peacefully fall asleep while suffering from hypothermia, or be ripped apart by uh large cats I think, that'd be awesome, they'd just break my neck and eat me
or I'd be a python and take on a crocogator and end up like this: http://tinyurl.com/9gqyq
ESPLODED
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:40:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.futuremusic.com/news/images/myspace_tila_tequila1.jpg
yes she needs to grow a new head.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:38:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
also Tila Tequila has a mushed-in asian pugface, that whore
just thought you'd like to know
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:38:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually I would like to die whilst diving for precious gold then whilst jigging for joy a shark to bite my head off. My arms flailing, ripping the sharks head off.
Basically the best underwater battle known to men.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:34:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Me too, my friend, me too.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:33:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If I have to go, that's the way I want to go.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:32:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This time my orange juice didn't have clumpies in the bottom and for that I am grateful
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:32:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nah it's cool we're still friends right? otherwise I'd be all, 'die in a hole! lit on fire! with snakes! venomous ones! and maybe scorpions too because they're fucking terrifying, scorpions totally suck man all 'hey I'm an arthropod but no I'm not a spider I'll fucking sting you with my stinger and you'll die, dude, you'll DIE, because we're soo fucking scary, you'll die of FEAR and POISON from my STINGER jesus' and that's how they are'
right.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:28:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
doucheface? that was my attempt at humour below.
FAIL
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:27:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
3:27 AM doucheface
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:22:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ballare is such a drunk its only 10 in the morning
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-12-01 05:22:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
drunk
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-12-01 01:27:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
sad..
but still good
ok im done now
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-12-01 01:22:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
you're one of my favorites
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-12-01 01:21:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
having read (and rated) the first.. this was awesome
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2007-11-30 22:56:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
yep
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-11-30 22:54:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
so, whats your problem with me?
i probably won't be willing to change anything in an effort to rectify the situation, but you piqued my curiosity.
i didn't read this so it gets a, +2. that's only fair.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2007-11-30 22:17:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Pearl of wisdom below.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-11-30 22:12:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd hit it.