SPT: Things Everyone Should Know #1 (1072 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.37 on 53 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by The Writer Formerly Known As Yozz (View user info) at 2007-12-06 11:39:47 EST
Never sneak up on a rhino.
Explanation:
Most wild animal attacks occur when a person on foot (any person - not necessarily a hunter) crosses the boundary of animal's escape-circle, and then enters its inner attack-circle, without the animal being in any way aware of his presence. THEN, when the animal is suddenly and unexpectedly confronted by the man at very close quarters, its automatic reaction is to attack.
Attack, under such circumstances, is a totally instinctive and compulsive survival mechanism. In that instant in time - when danger is unexpectedly encountered at very close quarters - the animal is precipitously shocked by fear. Reactive attack is then the animal's best means of defense.
This spontaneous strike-response to the violation of an animal's attack-circle zone is the reason why certain animals have been attributed terrible and unjust reputations for unprovoked aggression. The black rhinoceros, for example, is not as pugnacious as it has been branded. Like most big game animals it much prefers to run away from an approaching man than to attack him. Yet, universally, the black rhino is believed to be naturally belligerent. To understand this contradiction one has to understand something about the black rhino's behavior.
The Black Rhino is known for its nervous, unpredictable temperament. They are principally nocturnal animals. They spend the night wandering about feeding and, typically, they lie up during the heat of the day in the thickest of thick bush. There they often sleep so very soundly that a man on foot can find himself deep inside a rhino's attack-circle - indeed right on top of the animal - before either the man or the rhino are aware of each other's presence.
When a black rhino - even one that has never been hunted by man - is suddenly awakened under such circumstances, it will blindly charge the intruder.
User Reviews
Submitted by loopdeloo (user info) at 2008-05-13 11:10:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Understood!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-31 17:52:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fine. I anything I have learned that in future, instead of claiming accounts that are not mine as mine as a loke, i should just keep my fat gob shut.
I do think the review about forgetting to switch posts was genius on my part but I have seen it done loads, so I guess it isn't that original.
I swear on my kiddies lives, I only have the two accounts mentioned.
Looking back, I can hazard a good guess who TheDoc was but if you want to believe it was me, I can't change your mind.
Out of interest, why don't you camwhore for real? I am not being funny, but are you an alter?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-31 17:41:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ugh, I do hate it when you just ignore me.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-31 17:33:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/113626
My only alter is DreamWeaver. Look at the reviews, I fucked that up from the word go. Now everyone knows it is me.
I applied for another account a few months ago but I was denied. I don't think I could handle one anyway.
I swear my only 2 accounts are Orphy and DW. I am pretty upfront.
If you don't like me, I can't make you. But I am not a man, nor am I theDoctor.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-31 17:28:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha you actually believed I was theDoctor? I don't know who that was but I made sure I +2ed everyone of his -2s. And you never answered my rhino query :(
ps I also said that I was TheUniter. Did you believe that too?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-01-04 16:28:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You never did answer my rhino related questions.
*sigh*
Some rhino expert.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-12-06 23:49:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-12-06 20:14:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
O RLY
Submitted by Leonore (user info) at 2007-12-06 18:23:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Vital fucking knowledge.
Submitted by Little_Sally (user info) at 2007-12-06 18:07:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:45:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am TheDoctor and this post sucks. So does orphelia.
Submitted by triangle_man (user info) at 2007-12-06 15:23:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
good point!
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-12-06 14:18:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
yea man, and never ever ever sneak up on dinosaurs. Fuck mang those things are scary.
Submitted by ConorJS (user info) at 2007-12-06 13:47:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
http://youtube.com/watch?v=K-o0-r5bClE&feature=related
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-12-06 13:41:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 13:10:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2007-12-06 18:09:38 GMT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not fat, but certainly slow.
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Well played.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2007-12-06 13:09:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not fat, but certainly slow.
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 13:08:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2007-12-06 18:07:28 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bubba isn't actually fat, he just has a pot belly.
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Surely you can admit that anyone with a name like Bubba should just be fat so that their figure fits their rotund name.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2007-12-06 13:07:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bubba isn't actually fat, he just has a pot belly.
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2007-12-06 13:06:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ooops, forgot to +2.
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2007-12-06 13:06:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Never sneak up on a Rhymenocerous, either. I blindly windmill in a flailing tornado of fists, teeth and tears. I also like a table tennis, basket weaving, and on weekends I travel to the city to take a pictures of a womens while they make a toilet.
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 13:05:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You couldn't handle the truth.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:58:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fine I am not TheDoctor. You win. (We both know the truth, though).
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:56:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You believed him? (PS, stop pretending to be me, it's irritating)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:55:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bubba is not fat. He told me.
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:52:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Yozz where is your lover Bubba when you need him eh?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:46:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn ignore that below, I forgot to switch accounts. Whoops
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:45:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am TheDoctor and this post sucks. So does orphelia.
Submitted by Creepy_guy (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:41:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:35:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
so rhino tipping is a bad idea?
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Fuck, that'd be fun
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:38:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
TheDoc is gonna make Yozz so angry!
Can anyone help me with my serious, but ignored by the author, rhino queries?
I thought Yozz was some kinda rhino expert...
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:35:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
so rhino tipping is a bad idea?
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:34:11 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:33:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Really now, does everyone need to know about rhino defence?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:31:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Stop -2ing this post it is delightfully entertaining
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:30:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
INCREDIBLY SO.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:29:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am very fast at switching accounts, no?
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:28:17 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Stop talking to yourself orphelia.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:27:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Doc- please, as your master and creator you should have more respect. Turning into quite the Frankensteins Monster aren't we?
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:25:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 17:24:05 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yozz and Doc - play nice. Please could you answer my rhino queries.
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A rhino cock would be too big for even you to accomodate. I'm just assuming that was your query.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:24:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yozz and Doc - play nice. Please could you answer my rhino queries.
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:22:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2007-12-06 17:19:17 GMT (#)
Ranking: 0
Please get the fuck off my post.
+++++++
Or you'll what exactly? Hunt me down? Come on tough guy, get off the 'roids and chill out.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:21:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good to know, though I already learned about this from watching "The Gods must be Crazy" 15 years ago.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:19:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Please get the fuck off my post.
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:18:30 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Ratings don't count for anything buddy.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:17:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:13:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I hope you didn't expect anything more.
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My ratings are fair! Wa wa wa!
*stomps feet like a little girl*
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:15:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I AM TheDoctor!
Submitted by TheDoctor (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:13:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I hope you didn't expect anything more.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 12:01:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh. That is not very promising. So throwing candy as a distraction/playing dead/shouting vile insults about its mother/climbing a tree/making loud scary noises/shooting it in the ass, won't work?
What speeds do rhinos reach? What if the rhino was ill or old or having an off day?
So many rhino related questions...
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2007-12-06 11:58:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 11:55:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What should one do when one finds oneself under rhino attack?
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You don't really have much choice. You are either going to die or you are going to be ok. The attack will only last long enough for the rhino to clear the danger. He might swing and miss (Hey batta batta batta batta) while running away - but don't count it.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2007-12-06 11:55:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What should one do when one finds oneself under rhino attack?
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-12-06 11:55:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The infamous falcon punch courtesy Blitz Bob, below.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-12-06 11:48:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Educational post auto +2.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-12-06 11:48:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
This picture would have made this post:
http://i24.tinypic.com/16hjcsp.gif
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2007-12-06 11:41:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This post would have been good if it was about the Black Panthers and had a photoshopped picture of Governer shwazenegger fucking shaka khan.