Platonicka (977 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 0.26 on 34 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by EbolaMay (View user info) at 2008-01-20 23:04:41 EST
She has a nice body. She has a pretty face.
She rubs my shoulders. Her hair is stringy and brown and long. I knew her years ago. I know her again now.
We are friends.
Her life is hell.
My life is hell.
We are the same age.
I slept with her today, all day.
Her cat annoys me. To death. I thought of killing it. I didn't.
There is no sex.
Platonic.
If you saw us, curled up. If you saw us, laughing. If you saw us, making jokes, looking for work, watching funny videos on Youtube.
If you saw us...
You'd think we were married.
Anyway. Her troubles are over.
I killed her tonight.
User Reviews
Submitted by maf54 (user info) at 2008-05-14 03:53:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
In your mouth too?
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-01-22 12:59:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114469
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-22 03:39:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114465
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-22 02:37:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You and Chaos Jester should make violent gay love to Evanescence.
Submitted by gravitas (user info) at 2008-01-22 00:49:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-01-21 23:12:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You're dating that chick from the Ring?
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-01-21 21:22:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
....ok?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-01-21 21:10:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
shite
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-01-21 21:05:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
So when is the actual meltdown going to happen?
Please take lots of pictures.
ps- This was terrible.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-01-21 20:36:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm rating the opposite of Bubba on every post.
It saves the time and effort of actually reading it.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-21 20:14:49 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Bottom-Feeding dogshit.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-01-21 14:43:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-01-21 13:55:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
ok guy
?
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-01-21 13:41:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
yea but, HOW exactly did you kill her? it's all in the details.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-01-21 13:32:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
This feels too true.
Submitted by BritishBeef (user info) at 2008-01-21 11:56:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2008-01-21 11:34:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
... i was hoping for a music post by an emo metal band
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-01-21 11:13:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm giving you a zero only because I think you're serious. I think you ACTUALLY killed someone and I am afraid.
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-01-21 10:28:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
lol
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-01-21 10:24:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-01-21 09:43:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I was going to give this a pity +1 if you hadn't had that ending. have a -1.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2008-01-21 07:46:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
emily rose is scary.
Submitted by stone8946 (user info) at 2008-01-21 07:40:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I think you made the right decision.
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-01-21 06:05:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Meh. Would've been better had you raped her after she was dead.
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2008-01-21 04:34:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Grimm (user info) at 2008-01-21 02:36:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked it.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-01-21 02:00:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No, man. Black Caesar is real, he was on my TV like five minutes ago.
Moron.
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2008-01-21 01:57:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
i call malarky on that shit
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-01-21 01:53:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Man, Black Caesar just went through some fucked up shit, man. You should rent it from your local, wherever you can find it. His troubles far exceed yours or mine.
Mead.
Submitted by Falafel (user info) at 2008-01-21 00:05:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Linus (user info) at 2008-01-20 23:09:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
These twist endings are alienating.
-----------
I enjoyed the twist ending.
This comment reminded me of the crack-out art teacher at the high school I went to. She taught a Design class that my brother took. One of their assignments was to design a brand new album cover for an existing album/band.
When she pulled out one of the example pieces from the year before, she exclaimed that it "screamed disillusionment. It's like <something about a man ripping his shirt open and dancing in the rain> and two angels pouring a Coke over his head."
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2008-01-20 23:46:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2008-01-20 23:35:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
lame
______________
second.
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-20 23:38:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2008-01-20 23:35:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
lame
Submitted by Linus (user info) at 2008-01-20 23:09:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
These twist endings are alienating.