Harmonicka (840 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 1.04 on 30 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by netimportant (View user info) at 2008-01-22 03:38:10 EST
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114450
She has a nice body. Dammit, I wish I played bass.
She rubs my shoulders...in my imagination. She grabs my thingy and goes down. And I'm long. I've imagined this from the bushes outside her window. I imagine it now.
We aren't even friends.
But I'll serenade her well.
She'll fall under my spell.
We'll be on the same page.
I'm going to get laid today. There must be a way.
The guitar is much cooler. I thought about learning it. I didn't.
Still no sex.
Harmonica.
If you saw me, playing it. If you saw her, screaming at me to get out of her house. If you saw me accidentally looking up her skirt and trying to brush against her boob.
If you saw me...
You'd think I was Eric Rice.
The cops are on their way? I guess my song is over.
User Reviews
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-01-24 09:13:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-24 03:07:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Method is such a dark and handsome stud. What do you say we get together sometime and make out?
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Only if you lock me in your house, break my ankles and force me to write the sorrowful tale of your miserable existence
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2008-01-23 19:23:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
What's in that dude's mouth?
Submitted by Fabish (user info) at 2008-01-23 03:48:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha. Been a while since I've seen that picture. Wonder if that guy every got what he had coming...
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-23 00:35:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
surface
First I'll get me a real good edumacation
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-23 00:32:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I think I'm going to get a nose job and compete for Miss America and hope that my nude pictures, sex tapes, and insolent behavior on the Internet never surfaces...what do you guys think?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-01-23 00:17:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-01-22 05:16:17 CST (#)
Ranking: 2
When I was a kid I'd visit my dying & declining Grandfather in the Stockport family home. In the good days he would sit by the coal fire with his back to the TV telling me stories about eating good eggs in Burma. At some point he gave me a harmonica, a cheap mass produced one. As time went by he went deaf and retreated into an isolated world of his own, with moats of bad temper between him and us.
Even as he lay in hospital biting the nurses and swearing at our fixed, rictus, grins he was the lucky one because I'll tell you now; I was fucking shit at playing the harmonica.""""
GENIUS
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-01-22 19:25:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-01-22 10:00:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 'cause I got laid last night!
Boo yah!
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hmmmm - whenever i see comments like this I always think 'ummmm no you didn't'
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-22 16:16:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
IHAKF
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-01-22 16:09:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Who is Eric Rice anyway?
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-01-22 15:59:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Eric D. Rice!
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-01-22 14:45:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hehehehehehe.
This made me giggle, Squaw Little Big Chin.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-01-22 13:10:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2008-01-22 12:34:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
heehee
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2008-01-22 12:27:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for 'nergin'.
Seriously, I larfed.
...
Does it make you happy to know that you make me...uneasy?
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-01-22 10:39:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
cunt whiplash!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-01-22 10:31:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-01-22 10:00:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 'cause I got laid last night!
Boo yah!
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-22 08:49:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I took the Director's creepy story, replaced the narrator with a nergin in hopes that many of you would identify, and topped it off with ERIC RICE PLAYING A HARMONICA WHAT'S NOT TO LOVE?!
You have no idea how hilarious this was to me at 3:30 in the morning
I have to sleep now :(
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-01-22 08:43:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-01-22 08:29:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKbU8B-QVZk
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-01-22 08:22:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHA
I has kicking around the idea of resurrecting his "top 10 uber-users that I'd suck the piss out of" series, but I just couldn't do it. It's just too creepy.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-01-22 07:04:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
better than the original
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-22 06:55:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I certainly hope so!
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-01-22 06:52:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
also: Will this be a bandwagon of every term from that Adam Sandler song concerning the Jewish holiday?
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-01-22 06:43:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for Berty's review. That funny stuff right there!
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-01-22 06:16:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
When I was a kid I'd visit my dying & declining Grandfather in the Stockport family home. In the good days he would sit by the coal fire with his back to the TV telling me stories about eating good eggs in Burma. At some point he gave me a harmonica, a cheap mass produced one. As time went by he went deaf and retreated into an isolated world of his own, with moats of bad temper between him and us.
Even as he lay in hospital biting the nurses and swearing at our fixed, rictus, grins he was the lucky one because I'll tell you now; I was fucking shit at playing the harmonica.
Submitted by Grimm (user info) at 2008-01-22 05:24:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-01-22 04:13:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jesus loves you.
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-22 04:09:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Are you a victim of Eric D. Rice?
Submitted by Linus (user info) at 2008-01-22 04:07:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm not sure why, but I hate this.