I Thought It Would Be A Good Idea to Eat A Tuna Sandwich. But It Wasn't (868 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.06 on 44 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by I_can_get_you_a_toe (View user info) at 2008-01-23 16:20:50 EST
I'm at work and I think I'm still drunk.
At least the smell of fish is more overpowering than the smell of booze. That's kind of gross and I'm pretty sure that's a bad thing.
A bald guy sat in front of me on the bus this morning, he had a scab on the back of his head and it nearly made me dry heave. So i moved to another seat. The look of hurt he gave me made me feel bad, but I got over it pretty quickly.
A couple of months ago I went to Rotorua. Rotorua is a town in New Zealand that smells like sulphur. My friends and I had ended up at some random house by the side of a lake and by 8am were ready to go somewhere and sleep. So into the back of the van we piled, and that was when the weird hippie chick handed out canisters of Nos.
It was the first time I had ever done Nos, and it was brilliant. I love drugs and can never understand people who are completely against them.
I like Britney Spears's new song, I have the music video on my IPod, but I have to hide it from people because i don't think they'd understand.
If I found a big bag of money, I'd keep it.
Last Friday I saw Rage Against The Machine. I don't really remember it all that well because i was drinking vodka and had accidentally stumbled into the part of the crowd where they put all the giant tall men, so i couldn't see shit.
Cigarettes in most pits are generally a bad idea, I burnt a guy. The look of hurt he gave me made me feel bad, but I got over it pretty quickly.
User Reviews
Submitted by Val (user info) at 2008-06-01 16:16:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i find you fascinating
Submitted by Progr3ss (user info) at 2008-01-25 03:05:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You went to BDO huh?
Heard Bjork was shithouse.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-01-24 20:29:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
How are you dick sucking skills?
Submitted by DreamWeaver (user info) at 2008-01-24 19:35:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Camwhore, bitch.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-01-24 17:02:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i_can_get_you_a_two
But I won't.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2008-01-24 13:29:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-01-24 08:57:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Meh.
Submitted by BritishBeef (user info) at 2008-01-24 08:34:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
you mean NOX surely?
Nos is the big fat guy down the street missing tip of his nose.
I'm pretty sure he doesn't come in canisters, and if he did, you wouldn't want one.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-01-24 07:40:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I had a tuna salad salad 2 nights ago for dinner. I've been trying to eat more healty. I was doing good until last night, I think. I don't know the nutritional value of my meal but here's what it was: Breaded pork chop (baked, not fried), rice, carrots, and a salad. Of course I washed that down with 3 vodka n' juices, and it tasted pretty fucking good. I don't know if it was healthy or not, though.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-01-24 05:27:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You crazy Kiwi.
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2008-01-24 02:08:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
fuck off
Submitted by gravitas (user info) at 2008-01-24 00:04:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-01-23 23:24:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought it would be a good idea to read this post and IT wasn't either.
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2008-01-23 22:34:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-01-23 22:02:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2008-01-23 21:36:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nitrous oxide, ok.
Whippets, ok.
NOS stupid. Stupid in Fast in the furious and stupid in the lungs of idiots who call it that.
---
oh i'm so sorry, I didn't realise that the slang words used in my country need to fucking meet with american approval before they can be used.
Submitted by jimboruckus (user info) at 2008-01-23 21:42:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
mistake
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2008-01-23 21:36:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nitrous oxide, ok.
Whippets, ok.
NOS stupid. Stupid in Fast in the furious and stupid in the lungs of idiots who call it that.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-01-23 19:15:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
They're called "whip-its" because you could (maybe still can, I have no idea) buy small tubes of the compressed gas and use it to make heavy cream into whipped cream.
Very well done, grasshopper.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-01-23 19:00:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-01-23 18:06:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
i thought this might have a camwhore with it.
i'm not sure why. rob thought so too though, so there must be SOME reason.
---
next post. maybe. maybe not. I'll have to stop drinking for a couple of days to get rid of the ruddy complexion though.
and Sac, I didn't actually get to 'see' rage. But it was still awesome.
whip-its sound like a ready made dessert.
Submitted by jimboruckus (user info) at 2008-01-23 18:58:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by ConorJS (user info) at 2008-01-23 18:47:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-01-23 18:20:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
In the States, what you call 'Nos' is (I think) referred to as 'whip-its'. Medical-grade nitrous oxide, legitimately used as an anaesthetic. In the States, 'Nos' (pronounced 'Naws') is often used by people who have seen those movies that I can't stand to refer to the sulfur-infused nitrous oxide that's sometimes used in drag race cars. As you posted this tale you clearly know the difference or haven't been faced with the choice. Anyone who doesn't know the difference: it is worth your life to learn it now.
Whip-its carried around in alarge latex balloon at a Grateful Dead show are immensely fun. The previous sentence is not an admission or an endorsement in any way.
======================
One of the few times I ever just fell right the fuck over from substance abuse was after taking in a lungful of nitrous oxide from a balloon. I'm sure the booze and pot didn't help any, either.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-01-23 18:46:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love drugs and can never understand people who are completely against them.
--------
I'm not one of those tards that are all, "man, drugs change the way I think, changed my life maaan", but I agree whole heartedly with you. It's an activity that to me seems just as normal as masturbating because it feels good, or some other analogy that's less retarded than mine.
I only like natural ones though, even if they're equally dangerous, it feels more safe to me.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-01-23 18:20:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
In the States, what you call 'Nos' is (I think) referred to as 'whip-its'. Medical-grade nitrous oxide, legitimately used as an anaesthetic. In the States, 'Nos' (pronounced 'Naws') is often used by people who have seen those movies that I can't stand to refer to the sulfur-infused nitrous oxide that's sometimes used in drag race cars. As you posted this tale you clearly know the difference or haven't been faced with the choice. Anyone who doesn't know the difference: it is worth your life to learn it now.
Whip-its carried around in alarge latex balloon at a Grateful Dead show are immensely fun. The previous sentence is not an admission or an endorsement in any way.
Submitted by Lib (user info) at 2008-01-23 18:13:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
For the tuna and drugs
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-01-23 18:06:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
i thought this might have a camwhore with it.
i'm not sure why. rob thought so too though, so there must be SOME reason.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-01-23 17:45:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's always comforting to know there's someone out there who's more of a hot mess than I. Keep on drinking and drugging, dear - just don't forget to coordinate a D.D.
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-01-23 17:43:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I laughed no less then three times.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-01-23 17:26:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You got to see Rage- WOO!
I went to the Janes Addiction reunion years ago, and because I insisted on floor tickets, I didn't see very much of the show. My friends were all like "PERRY FARRELL IS MAKING OUT WITH DAVE NAVARRO RIGHT NOW!" and I could only listen to them describe it.
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2008-01-23 17:24:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
IIIIIIII LLLLLOOOOVVVEEEESSSSS YYYYYOOOOUUUU!!!
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2008-01-23 17:15:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Tuna => vomit
We used to get along, but it betrayed me.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-01-23 17:00:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
OMFG
I like that new Brittany song too - the weird thing is, I run into all kinds of people that have that same dirty little secret.
Maybe cuz she's totally bonkers it's ok.
No?
Still gay?
Fuck.
Submitted by triangle_man (user info) at 2008-01-23 17:00:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You tuuuuubbe
tubifex tubifex
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:59:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:57:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Or link us the you tube shit of you giggling.
---
*shudders*
god no.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:58:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh. Ok. I wait. I am not going anywhere...
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:57:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, camwhore bitch. Or link us the you tube shit of you giggling. Drunk, as usual.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:57:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
all in good time rob. all in good time.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:53:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
GOD DAMMIT.
I thought cam-whore for sure.
wimp.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:50:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I love drugs and can never understand people who are completely against them.
-----
I don't understand why people do drugs. Most people think I am completely against them. I have to go be productive now.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:40:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought this was smashing. Yes, smashing.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:32:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:30:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.hobowars.com
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:27:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I can remember approximately 10 seconds of a Phish show I saw 13 years ago:
Cracklin rosie, get on board
We're gonna ride till there ain't no more to go
Taking it slow
Lord, dont you know
Have made me a time with a poor man's lady!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I drank a fifth of rye before the show and then beers at the show. It was awesome.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:24:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
damn
i thought it would be ravenous
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-01-23 16:23:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -1