The BOSH Man! WANDERS AIMLESSLY IN OUTER SPACE!! (930 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.7 on 52 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Dude, thats BOSH! (View user info) at 2008-01-25 09:49:59 EST
So there I was teaching the Kickapoo Indians how to set Earl Scruggs on fire when all of a sudden The Kid Who Knows Everything impregnated the princess of the tribe.
The Kickapoops, as he calls them, were pretty pissed off about it and it took 3 barrels of beer and a couple spliffs to calm them down.
We started getting pretty hungry so I made everyone hotdogs. Everyone seemed pretty agreeable to that, except the Kid Who Knows Everything. He looked at the Chieftain of the Kickapoops with disgust.
"How can you eat that?"
"You're tellin' me you've never had a hot dog?"
"No! I'm not putting anything shaped like that in my mouth"
"What about a banana?"
"No!"
"Sausage?"
"No!"
"What about a sausage that's been cut up into tiny pieces?"
"No! Then its just like.. you know.. its just like a chopped up cock."
"What about a sandwich?
"You mean like a regular flat sandwich?"
"Yea"
"Well yea, I'd eat that."
"Ok! Now how about a sandwich shaped like a dick?!"
"NO!!!!!!!! THAT DEFEATS THE WHOLE PURPOSE!! ALL YOU REALLY GOT THEN IS A HOT DOG!!"
The Kid Who Knows Everything was so angry hell fell down. The Kickapoops started laughing real hard, so I set them all on fire and lit up a cigarette. The Kid Who Knows Everything looked somewhat relieved.
"Don't worry Kid, Those hotdogs were made of poison anyways"
"Righteous! But I already knew that.."
"Totally!" I gave him a mondo high five.
We took some pretty bosh horses and went on a quest to find Curley's gold. Daniel Stern came by and asked us to suck rattlesnake poison out of his butt, so my horse, who I named Colonel Beefhawk, kicked him in the neck. The Kid who Knows Everything told him Kevin Arnold was a bitch and that he should stop narrating his voice on 'The Wonder Years'. Even Larry Bird hates Daniel Stern. I just lit up a cigarette and nodded in agreement.
Years later, we found Curley's gold and became millionaires. We stopped by Scruggs place to break his banjo but the Kickapoops had already beat us to it. Even The Kid Who Knows Everything didn't know what was going on.
The Chieftain of the tribe walked up to us with a look of gratitude on his face.
"Boshdude and Omniscient One, the hotdogs you gave us were made of poison, but in your infinite wisdom, you were able to see that setting us on fire was the antidote.
"Totally dude, rock n' roll!"
"Rock n' roll indeed, Boshman. We have learned a lot from you. We keep feeding Scruggs poison hot dogs and then setting him on fire. I don't think he is enjoying it, but as you taught us: 'Scruggs is a cock loving stegosaurus fucker' ..so we just ignore him.
"Gnarly! Later on I will teach you about waterproof tacos!"
"Tubular!" is what the Chieftain said.
"Righteous!"
"Mondo!"
"Powerful!"
"Knowledgeable!"
I looked at The Kid, he had just lit up a cigarette and was nodding in agreement.
"That'll do, Chieftain Kickapoop. Rock into the Future!"
"We will indeed rock!"
The Kid had eaten his horse by now, so he just levitated/hovered around while Colonel Beefhawk and I wandered aimlessly into outer space.
User Reviews
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:07:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was dope.
Submitted by theshadypeach (user info) at 2008-04-27 22:14:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-02-01 12:52:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahaha, i just watched that episode where Murderface won't eat anything shaped like a dick again. nice.
Submitted by zwerg (user info) at 2008-01-28 12:20:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-01-27 18:17:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i read this yesterday but i went to watch metaloklypse clips on youtube before I rated it.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2008-01-27 18:08:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Seeing how I was upstairs anyhow.
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-01-26 06:12:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BOSHness
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2008-01-26 05:47:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
bosh
Submitted by Constitution (user info) at 2008-01-25 20:32:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You have to make a movie at some point.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-01-25 18:53:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Zampano (user info) at 2008-01-25 18:37:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-25 15:32:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
ahahahahhahahahahahh
i love the reviews on this post.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2008-01-25 15:28:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am stealing the name Colonel Beefhawk and using it next comic I make
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-01-25 15:24:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Also, you never attribute your quotes. Just like Hemmingway. If those fucking narcs want to know who's talking they can just mind their own fucking business. Rock on.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-01-25 15:22:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You know what I like? You take ordinary everyday things like walking in space, or setting Earl Scruggs on fire and make them Bosh. That takes talent.
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2008-01-25 15:18:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't believe that there's anyone else on Uber who I would be able to tolerate this from.
You, however, make it look so totally natural and...and BOSH!
+2 for you.
Weirdo.
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2008-01-25 14:44:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Entertaining as usual.
*throws back a shot of whiskey, grabs his stout and rolls on.....
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:55:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
that's pretty bosh
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:54:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't understand anything I just read. There may be a blown fuse behind my left ear.
And yet, somehow, I laughed.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:51:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*most* every night.
Sometimes I just cuddle.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:46:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I get laid every night.
I try not to let it interfere with my enjoyment (or lack thereof) of your posts, however.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:42:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
did you get laid or something last night, Uniter?
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:40:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:34:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
yep
except when it comes to making boshton red sox tribute posts, which is why you're a bearfucker.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:32:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
oh yeah.
i forgot i did that.
see, i keep my word to faceless uber users sometimes!
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:31:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
yea because you're a man of your word and rated like 85 of my posts in one day.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:28:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
and now i wrecked my rating of you.
i think you were my highest rated user where i had offered more than a handful of reviews.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:27:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i know.
i was just joshing you.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:26:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hahaha aww
it's all in fun my good man.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:25:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114572#2634814
i'm feeling sensitive today.
Submitted by jojojojoan (user info) at 2008-01-25 13:09:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-25 11:53:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
and this
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/0e7e65a11c
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-25 11:51:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i wish i'd thought of this
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/d7e5ec2c55
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2008-01-25 11:50:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
the kickapoo tribe's feet really smell bad
Submitted by ConorJS (user info) at 2008-01-25 11:41:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The Kickapoops, as he calls them, were pretty pissed off about it and it took 3 barrels of beer and a couple spliffs to calm them down.
=====
I already laughed.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-25 11:40:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by gascs (user info) at 2008-01-25 11:38:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not your best, but definitely better than that narc thing.
--
hahahahha i want to add the kickapoops to my narc list.
Submitted by gascs (user info) at 2008-01-25 11:38:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not your best, but definitely better than that narc thing.
Submitted by Creepy_guy (user info) at 2008-01-25 11:23:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Most excellent. I love your posts, man
Submitted by loopdeloo (user info) at 2008-01-25 11:14:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-01-25 11:05:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-01-25 10:20:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-01-25 10:20:08 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You aren't worthy of a comment.
Submitted by Wompom (user info) at 2008-01-25 10:19:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dude thats brondo
Submitted by deathmobile (user info) at 2008-01-25 10:12:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Totally bosh.
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2008-01-25 10:05:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
bill and teds mutherfuckin adventure
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-01-25 10:03:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
:D
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-01-25 10:03:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know what's going on here at all.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-01-25 09:57:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha drugs
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-01-25 09:55:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Inter STELLAR!
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-01-25 09:54:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I could really go for a spliff and some sausage.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-01-25 09:52:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep it foolish.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-01-25 09:50:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
with apologies to william murderface