Across the country to change - Part 1 (672 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.59 on 46 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Dalai Queso (View user info) at 2008-01-27 14:20:42 EST
I reflect on my past with a smile, slightly disgusted, but pleased with the extent of my progress.
Wallowing in despair, my half-hearted suicide attempts failed on several occasions. Somehow I maintained a sliver of hope for the future. "My friends are all I've got" I would tell myself as we all downed another shot. Even now I would not say they were or are bad people, but they certainly failed to be uplifting to a soul like my own. Empty companionship. Hollow relationships centered around our shared status as outcasts.
An oppurtunity to live in lovely California arose 2 weeks before Christmas '05. The prospect of "getting away from it all" overshadowed the fact that I would be alone on the opposite side of the country with a poverty level income in one of the largest cities in the world. I was without fear. I wanted to end my life anyway, and what better way than to start a new one? The day after Christmas of 2005 I set out on the highway. Leaving my old life behind, I made that 4 day drive the start of many changes. I quit smoking, and determined to eat less to combat my borderline obesity. I was still subject to severe bouts of depression, but I was going to change or die trying.
I arrived in La Mirada on January first of 2006. I moved in with a co-worker at the home-based business I drove out to work for. I did computer work and boring office labor ten hours per day, four days each week. My first few weekends involved finding new karaoke bars to determine which I would frequent.
Traffic became unbearable to me quickly. I was used to long open roads and infrequent stops. I drove through 5 cities to get to work in Whittier each day because no freeways provided a direct route. I sold my car and purchased a 500cc Suzuki, and didn't pay much attention to laws regarding motorcycles. I taught myself to ride on a permit. 3 days after I purchased it, I rode it to work. Within 2 weeks I was lane-splitting. By week 3 I was on the freeways for joy-riding. It was about 3 months before I got my liscense. Shortly after that I registered and insured the bike. 3 days after that I got my first speeding ticket (though I was riding the same as I always did, I just finally got caught).
My situation at work was rapidly deteriorating. I was frustrated with my room-mate, bored with my job, and still the unhappy person I always was. I decided to find a place of my own, but considering my income, I didn't have a lot of options. I wound up in a Filipino ghetto part of Long Beach, paying $500 a month for a studio apartment in a complex that used to be assisted living for the insane. I quickly befriended my neigbor, who became my smoking buddy and dealer. So much for giving up pot. Shortly after moving I was "laid off".
My neighbor had an industrial job which he got me involved in by referral. The pay was better than my last job, and the hours allowed as much overtime as I could handle. I was making more money than I ever had in my life, and spending a good deal of it on chronic and gas.
Two of my favorite past-times were getting high and finding a jammed up freeway to breeze between the lanes for a visceral thrill. Hollywood was always a fun ride, though the scenery was disgusting. The simple pleasure of being in a place that so many only dreamed of visiting added another dimension of pleasure to each trip. I still didn't hold much value in my life and risked it regularly on the road. Most of my near death escapes I credited to my riding skill.
Barreling down a 2 lane road I was coming up on two big rigs, one in each lane. The truck in the right lane was a full car length ahead of the left rig. I swerved to the right lane and accelerated to make the gap before it was closed. As I approached the gap at about 70 mph, the big rigs going no faster than 35, the right rig applied the brakes, and I was about to be clotheslined by his bumper. I was less than 20 feet from the rapidly closing gap, and instinct took over. I pulled hard to the right, then dipped back steeply to the left to nearly perpendicular with the lanes. I tucked in my right elbow so it wouldn't hit the bumper of the right rig as I went under it, barely clearing the front bumper of the rig on the left. I pulled back to the right as hard as I could, clearing the median by inches, then straightening out before hitting the side of the right rig.
The drivers blasted their horns at me, disgusted by my wreckless behavior, or congratulating my survival, I'm not sure which. That was the closest I'd come to dying, but not the last time I'd split between two big rigs. That event I credited to divine intervention, and I became slightly more cautious in my riding habits. The near death thrills began to lose their excitement, however, and I was still feeling hollow and depressed.
That is about the time the real changes began...
User Reviews
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-01-29 15:52:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-01-29 15:16:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Brilliant...
Submitted by lostnphound (user info) at 2008-01-29 11:03:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2008-01-29 09:02:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
yay an actual post
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2008-01-28 18:09:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll read this series.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-01-28 11:48:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love these types of stories.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-01-27 17:58:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-01-27 17:58:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2008-01-27 17:55:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 17:22:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This deserves more traffic.
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 16:01:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll take what I can get :)
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:59:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:57:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't believe I've ever had any sort of heat on one of my posts. I also don't entirely understand the appeal.
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Hush up and take what you're given. :D
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:57:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't believe I've ever had any sort of heat on one of my posts. I also don't entirely understand the appeal.
Submitted by Wompom (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:56:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:53:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:52:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not wholly concerned for rating. A bit of positive feedback makes me happy :)
**********
And a little heat would warm your soul. . . :)
**********
Indeed :)
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:53:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:52:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not wholly concerned for rating. A bit of positive feedback makes me happy :)
**********
And a little heat would warm your soul. . . :)
Submitted by Wompom (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:52:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wanna read the rest.
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:52:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not wholly concerned for rating. A bit of positive feedback makes me happy :)
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:50:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
okey dokey sadie
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:49:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:37:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Except for that stupid fuck Bubba.
Do you think the GRANDCHILDREN will grow up with cute little user names like Bubba2342 and Bubbette2343?
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Willie, you are stupid enough to believe everything I have ever written, aren't you? You really believe I am that old, mostly based on a phony ID card I once posted. You don't really know, do you? If I ever have granchildren, I want them to be JUST LIKE YOU, so I will have a good reason to drown them.
Think what you will and rate me as you wish, but why punish others on their posts simply to get back at me? Are you actually that big of an asshole? Those people did nothing to you. They wind up being collateral damage, and you are to blame. Even Method isn't that rotten, unless you are He.
My actual age, name, and everything else is up for grabs. You would grab it, too, being the fool you are. . .
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:45:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Now I'm lost
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:44:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cilla says the price is right.
But fuck Cilla, she don't know shit.
Grrrrrrrr
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:40:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
<3 !!!
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:39:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 20:32:30 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
Joey!!!!!!!!!!
-------------
Oh Mickey You're so fine,
Youre so fine you blow my mind.
Hey Mickey (Huff Huff)
Hey Mickey (Huff Huff)
Oh Mickey Youre so Fine,
Youre so Fine You Blow My Mind
Hey Mickey (Huff Huff)
Hey Mickey
(Repeat)
Verse 1
Hey Mickey
Youve been around all night
and thats a little long,
You think you've got the right,
But I think youve got it wrong.
Why can't you say goodnight
So you can take me home Mickey,
Cause when You say you will
It always means you won't
Youre givin me the chills
baby, please baby don't
Every night you still leave me alone
Mickey.
Chorus
Oh Mickey what a pity you dont understand
You take me by the heart
You take me by the hand
Oh Mickey Youre so pretty
Cant you understand?
Its guys like you Mickey
Oh what you do Mickey
Do Mickey
Dont break my heart Mickey.
Verse 2
Now When you take me by the hooves
Everyone's gonna know
Everytime you move
I let a little More show
There's Something we can use
So dont say no Mickey!
So Come on and give it to me
Anyway you can
Anyway you want to do it
Ill treat you like a man
Oh Please, Baby Please
Dont leave me in a jam Mickey!
Chorus
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:38:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks ~ I don't take much uberspeak to heart ;)
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:37:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Except for that stupid fuck Bubba.
Do you think the GRANDCHILDREN will grow up with cute little user names like Bubba2342 and Bubbette2343?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:34:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cheese dude, I stand by my original assessment of your work: Excellent.
Ignore HotWillie, everyone else does. . .
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:32:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Joey!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:25:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
HAHAHA It's working, isn't it Bubs?
Why don't you e-mail Bart and cry like the whiny little bitch you are?
And give those GRANDCHILDREN a kiss for me.
I'm sure they're proud of gramps hanging around ubersite screaming at their peers.
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:23:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 20:20:17 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
don't take offense!
---------
I took a fence once.
The council went apeshit.
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:20:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
don't take offense!
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:17:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:13:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hey bubba! I have 2 new posts you can camp on :)
*gets slaughtered*
===================
I have NO need to camp anywhere. I'm biding my time, waiting for Bart to catch on to the fact that HotWillie is fucking up the posts of others to get at me. Isn't that the sure sign of a FUCKING IDIOT!!????!!!
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:14:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 12:01:13 PST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:59:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 queso
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Woohoo! I merit a +2! joy :)
--------
indeed
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:13:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hey bubba! I have 2 new posts you can camp on :)
*gets slaughtered*
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:09:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:59:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
-2BUBBA
Sorry dude. New rating system. Still working out the kinks.
==========
The kink is in your neck, fagboy.
Submitted by jimboruckus (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:04:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 15:01:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:59:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 queso
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Woohoo! I merit a +2! joy :)
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:59:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 queso
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:59:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
-2BUBBA
Sorry dude. New rating system. Still working out the kinks.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:56:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:48:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:40:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:33:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, Bubba! I've been here lurking. I'm just not good enough at insulting to join most of the conversations.
==============
Pssshhh!! Don't let that bother you. Just throw out the most inane crap
you can think of a soon everyone knows who you are. Then they all hate your guts, but when you post, everyone reads it. :)
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I would only be hated for how lame my insults are :P
"Shlongy, clearly your spiritual centers are dormant.
TheUniter, your silence speaks volumes, coward.
SiCosemen, just what is wrong with you?"
But I might make an effort to try at some point ;)
Submitted by Zampano (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:40:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:40:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:33:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, Bubba! I've been here lurking. I'm just not good enough at insulting to join most of the conversations.
==============
Pssshhh!! Don't let that bother you. Just throw out the most inane crap
you can think of a soon everyone knows who you are. Then they all hate your guts, but when you post, everyone reads it. :)
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:33:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, Bubba! I've been here lurking. I'm just not good enough at insulting to join most of the conversations.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:31:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cheese Dude!! Long time no see.
Well-written, as usual. :)
Submitted by ooQueso (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:27:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, it's true. It's just too long of a story to put in one post.
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2008-01-27 14:26:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Is this a true story or not? I don't feel like reading your post history.