In The Beginning (508 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.23 on 20 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by GravityPurple (View user info) at 2008-01-28 00:16:01 EST
In the beginning there was space. Empty space. Everything was black once. Complete silence. There was nothing. But then at a point in time, which was endless then, small particles came together. By all logic they shouldn't have been there since there should have been nothing. But they were. If it weren't for those small particles, They would never have been made. And then there would still be Nothing.
The Particles started thinking. They realized that if they come together, they could become something more. So they started a long, hard process of becoming one. Because Time didn't exist yet, She couldn't kill them or make them stop. When we think of it, this process took millions of years, but for the Particles, it didn't take any amount of time. Because Nothing ruled everything, he didn't realize what the Particles were doing or he would have stopped them. It was because Nothing didn't realize the Particles that They came about.
After the Particles came together they noticed that there were still many Particles left over. So they joined again to make a second Being. And that is how They came about. After the second Being was made, Nothing realized what was happening. He felt heavy, as if there was something there. When the Particles were alone, Nothing didn't pay attention to them. What could they do anyways? But after two Beings came, he felt them. He looked all over for the Particles, but he couldn't find them. So he went to where he felt the heaviness, and there he saw the Beings. After a closer inspection, he saw that many Particles made up each Being.
"What are you doing?" Nothing roared, causing everything to shake. Nothing had never spoken before, and because he did now it caused a rift far away. Nothing felt a slight pain, but paid no attention to it, he was furious at the Particles. Because there was something in the Nothing, he lost a small bit of power. The Particles worked together and made the Beings look at the Nothing.
"We are becoming," said the first Being. After Time was born and had passed, People would come to call the first Being Eve. The second would be Lucifer.
"This cannot be!" Nothing shouted. The Rift became bigger and more Particles came into Nothing. Lucifer looked at Nothing and smiled. He knew that Nothing had lost part of his power and it made him happy. When he was just many Particles, Nothing was cruel when he acknowledged them. Seeing Nothing upset and weaker gave Lucifer a sense of power. Eve saw Nothing's power fade and was sad. When she was Particles, Nothing had been cruel also, but Eve was sweet and kind. She would one day be called the Mother of All. Lucifer would one day destroy Everything, the daughter of Nothing.
"Peace, be still," Eve said to Nothing, "You are hurting yourself." It was at this time that Nothing realized the Rift. He rushed to it, hoping to be able to stop it, but when he located it, it was too late. Millions upon millions of Particles had escaped. They also felt the heaviness and they rushed to it. It was there that the new Particles met Eve and Lucifer.
"Teach us," they whispered to the Beings. And so Lucifer taught them to Become. There were too many of the Particles for Lucifer to teach. So he sent half of them to Eve. And she taught them to Live.
Where Lucifer's Particles became stars, planets, suns, and galaxies, Eve's became lizards, deer, cats, dogs, mice, birds. Lucifer's Particles were helpful. Required in fact. For without places for Eve's Particles to Live, they would have surely dissipated.
But there was still something wrong. They couldn't grow. There was nothing to grow on. For everything living needs Time. So Eve and Lucifer worked together and gathered things they needed. Particles, Blackness, Life, and Death. And with this they made Time. And in Time they poured a part of themselves in her. Eve for her kindness and Lucifer for his pain.
Nothing did not ignore Lucifer and Eve though. He was enraged, for everything they Made, he lost more and more power. He knew that if he did not do something soon, he would dwindle away forever. So he went through all the things Lucifer and Eve made and took one Particle from each. After collecting them, he combined them all together and made his daughter: Everything.
He taught her all he could and told her to take one Particle from anything new that came about, or else she would also dwindle away. But every time he talked to his daughter, a new Rift would appear, and Particles would enter. Nothing did not quite die, but soon there was very little of him left. He sent Everything away, for he loved her very much and could not bear to be with her and not speak. But he knew if he did once, possibly twice, he would surely die.
So Everything went, knowing her fathers reasons and understanding them. She wept though and her tears formed oceans, lakes, streams... She stopped one day at a bright star. It intrigued her and she looked at the nine planets surrounding the bright star. The third one caught her attention. It was green and blue and brown. She went to it, and found Life everywhere. There was not one spot where something wasn't. She thought about it and realized that her father had no control over this planet. She remembered how weak he was, and she was sad. She sat down and cried. She cried for forty days and nights. Her tears flooded the planet and killed everything. Well... Almost everything.
Eve had seen Everything and her destruction. She had tried to stop her, but it didn't work. So she commanded a man to take his family and two of every animal into an ark that she told him to make. He did so, and because of him the third planet was saved.
Finally Everything looked up and saw what she had done. She saw the creatures she had killed and it saddened her. But she knew she could not cry anymore. If she did, it could hurt more things and she had no more tears. Everything saw Eve. "What have I done?" She whispered. Far away, Nothing heard Everything and wished to be with her, but Time had worked on him also and he was too weak and too old.
"Do not fear. There are others." Eve said and showed the ark to Everything. Everything smiled, glad that she had not killed all the creatures on the planet. Eve and Everything spent much time together and became close friends. But Everything was weakening. It was strange though, because Eve was the same as the first day she Became. And then Everything remembered what her father said. She told Eve that she had to leave and collect parts of creatures.
"I will miss you." Eve said the day Everything left. "I will miss you too." Everything told Eve. They hugged and Everything was gone. She first went across the third planet, named Earth. Then she went to all the other planets. Then stars. Then other galaxies. But one night as she traveled across a planet she met Lucifer.
"Hello." Everything said. Lucifer looked at her and stood still. She was beautiful. "Lady, welcome." Lucifer said, awe-struck. Everything looked around, but saw nothing. But it wasn't the type of nothing her father controlled. It was bare. The land was empty.
"Where is everything?" She asked. She felt weak just being on the planet.
"What do you mean?" Lucifer asked. He looked around and saw solitude, loneliness, and quite. All the things he loved. "There are many things here." He swept his arm across the land, but Everything could not see what he saw. She wasn't allowed to see what wasn't there. Not like Lucifer could. He was a Being. She was a Creation.
But Lucifer had fallen in love with Everything and wanted her to stay. He offered to try to teach her to see like he did and Everything accepted. After years, Everything could begin to see what wasn't there. She could also see Lucifer's love for her. But after she realized what it was, she realized that the same love was on her. She told Lucifer about it.
"I've loved you since I first met you," Lucifer confessed. And Everything and Lucifer lived together for many years. One day Everything came to Lucifer and told him that she was going to have a baby. And she did. And they named him Adam. But Everything had weakened again. She told Lucifer that she had to leave, but that she would be back. Lucifer was sad, and in her memory he made a great storm on the planet. He told her that as long as his love for her lived, the storm would continue and show her where to return to. Everything kissed Lucifer and left.
She once again went to every planet, star, and galaxy. But she was forever sad, for she would not be able to watch her son grow up. She missed Adam and Lucifer very much. She came to Earth and found her old friend Eve, who still looked the same as before. Their meeting caused great happiness over the planet and from that happiness a garden was formed. And it was called Eden.
In it Eve and Everything lived for a time. But Time had changed the garden and made things outside happen faster, so that a minute on the inside was an hour on the outside and a day inside was a year outside. Time had also fallen in love with Lucifer and she hated Everything for holding Lucifer's love. She also knew that if Everything was in one place for too long, she would weaken and then die. But Eve left the garden one day to see her Earth. And she saw cities that had not been there before. She took Everything with her the next day and showed her. Everything stepped off Eden's grounds and fell. She felt so weak now and told Eve so. Eve quickly rushed around the planet, collecting Particles of everything, for Particles still made things. And she brought each Particle back to Everything. Everything took them in and felt stronger. But she was still weak and needed to collect more. So she quickly departed Earth and went on her rounds again. This time she did not stop at Lucifer's planet though. She knew she would not want to leave if she did. So she went to all other places and saved the planet Humans had named Jupiter for the last. And Everything looked forward to the day she would meet her love and her son.
She finally finished collecting from the last galaxy and returned to Jupiter. But she found Time with Lucifer. Time had told him that Everything had died and in his grief Lucifer had turned to Time for comfort. Everything saw him with her and screamed a scream to shatter all. Far away Nothing woke from a deep sleep and yelled in pain for his daughter. And with his yell he passed away forever.
Lucifer looked up from Time and saw Everything and cried. He ran to her and fell to his knees, trying to explain. Time lay on the ground and smiled coyly at Everything. And in that smile Everything saw victory.
Everything cried one tear, and that tear fell into Lucifer's eye. And in that one tear Everything poured herself. And Lucifer's body drank up the tear to hold it forever. And Everything disappeared.
Lucifer turned on Time yelling at her for lying to him. But Time just smiled her victory. "It's over my love," She told Lucifer and tried to pull him down next to her. But he resisted.
"You killed her!" He yelled at Time. But Time stood and looked him directly in the eye that the tear had fallen in.
"No," she said, "You killed her. You drank her in that tear and you killed her." And thus the prophesy of Lucifer killing Everything was fulfilled. Lucifer sat down and cried. And with his last ounce of strength he sent out a burst of power. It traveled all over and destroyed every planet, star, and galaxy. Eve cried, for she knew she had lost her friend. Time screamed, for without the planets, stars, and galaxies, she didn't exist. And Time also disappeared. And again the Prophesy was fulfilled, for Lucifer had again destroyed everything.
But Adam still lived. As did the Beings. And Adam walked to the third planet and found Eden, which Eve had preserved from Lucifer's rage. Adam entered the garden and sat down under a tree in the middle of the garden. On the tree grew a bright red fruit. He picked one and ate it. And then he slept. When he woke up he saw someone.
"I am Adam."
"I am Eve."
And together they remade Everything, starting with Jupiter, and it's storm.
User Reviews
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-01-31 15:13:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-28 03:59:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm just saying, can you blame Eve for grabbing on someone else's forbidden fruit? And why is the devil a WOMAN?
seems pretty apt to me.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-01-29 18:10:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Zampano (user info) at 2008-01-28 21:38:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks for the kind words.
And, yes, my alias is from 'House of Leaves.' Apt you should say that the day after I started my second re-reading.
Submitted by Gravity_Purple (user info) at 2008-01-28 16:45:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
In Empty space, there is no concept of color, which makes this contradictory.
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Ohh, good point. Never thought about that. Now I'm going to spend a lot of time trying to imagine what empty space would look like. I'm pretty sure I'm not going to be able to figure it out though...
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-01-28 13:25:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
interesting.
i surprised myself by reading the whole thing.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-01-28 11:57:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Love it, but one thing:
"Empty space. Everything was black once."
In Empty space, there is no concept of color, which makes this contradictory.
Otherwise, pretty awesome.
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-01-28 09:32:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
It wasn't that good, but you obviously put a good bit of effort into it. Have a +1 because if you work on it more and clean it up a bit, it'd be quite beautiful.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-01-28 09:29:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
A much better, shorter,and accurate take on creation
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114215
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2008-01-28 08:44:27 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-01-28 08:14:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/92765
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2008-01-28 07:01:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
wasn't too crazy about it.
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-01-28 06:54:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2008-01-28 04:20:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
intense and excellent.
Submitted by Grimm (user info) at 2008-01-28 04:15:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-28 03:59:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm just saying, can you blame Eve for grabbing on someone else's forbidden fruit? And why is the devil a WOMAN?
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2008-01-28 02:47:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
poor lisa can't appreciate great art.
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-01-28 01:12:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Poor Adam is hung like a field mouse.
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2008-01-28 01:00:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
better than the biblical version
Submitted by PukingDog (user info) at 2008-01-28 00:58:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I am having a hard time critiquing this. "A" for effort. A bit much for me I guess.
Submitted by Zampano (user info) at 2008-01-28 00:32:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment