Uncle EI!! (679 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.14 on 35 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (View user info) at 2008-02-01 10:06:06 EST
Hello people of Uber. It is EI here. I have decided to use lots more full stops in my posts. I am not around much anymore so cry me a river, build yourself a bridge, and GET OVER IT. I know Muddy is upset. Poor guy. Only in America are "poor" people fat.
Anyhoo my sister is having a c-section today so I am waiting around home for a phonecall to tell me when the babies on its way. It's all quite exciting really. Uncle EI has a good ring to it.
I have a chance to choose the childs middle name. What shall I choose?? I like Benjamin.
Actually as im writing this my sister has just given birth to a baby boy, 8lb 6 oz!! Hurrah I am an uncle. Now that's what you call breaking news!!
Anyway I cant be bothered to finsih my post now, I have a nephew to visit.
User Reviews
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-03-06 00:26:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/51155#2663975
that s cuz the user was my alter and a -1 isn't suspicious. the following ratings were to put it on the MRR.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-02-20 20:34:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-02-17 13:58:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
id shove a butt plug up Rob's ass, i think he'd like it
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Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-04 04:25:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-02-02 10:37:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
There's only one middle name that's ever acceptable:
Danger
make that his middle name and he'll be getting laid in elementary school
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unfortunately it'll be by his creepy headmaster. and the headmasters brother. It's cool though because time heals all wounds......<drums fingers>.....well it probably happens in your fifties. :(
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2008-02-04 03:00:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
so what's it like to be both dad and uncle?
creepy bastard!
nice monkeys in the car
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-02-02 10:37:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
There's only one middle name that's ever acceptable:
Danger
make that his middle name and he'll be getting laid in elementary school
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-02 09:53:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2008-02-01 22:48:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't read much of your post. If it were not for the sloths driving a car in the woods I would have. While I'm sure the content sucked, it was because of the monkeys you get this.
+2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-01 17:41:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Em sweety, when I wrote that you were still knocking about on Uber.
I am pleased your sis has popped one out (poor her, c-sections are real painful after, tell her she hasn't stretched her tuppence and it is all worth it though!) but you never responded to the last email I sent donkeys ago or the get well soon e card (yes everyone else reading this, IRL I am a right soft cunt, so what?!) or even my Xmas card! :(
You know why I am hardly on MSN, that situation has got alot worse since.
You seem to be turning into Berty for slack internet responses.
CONGRATULATIONS all the same. Babies are brill!!!
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-02-01 14:38:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
called Mostyn :) he is so lovely, off to the pub now to wet the babies head!
Submitted by Wompom (user info) at 2008-02-01 14:07:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love that GIF
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-02-01 13:49:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
name it hidden101
Submitted by BeforeEmily (user info) at 2008-02-01 13:42:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:12:24 PST (#)
Ranking: 0
**********CT BARES HIS CHEST!**************
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-01-07 19:47:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
1. S.I. Co. Semen
2. Method
3. Jewtoast
4. CabaretGirl
5. Lungish
6. I BET HE HAS THE CHEST OF A SPARROW - THE BARON
7. Orphelia
8. Drogoroch
9. HurtByTheSun
10. Anansie
11. dithered
12. TheDoctor
13. scourge
14. FlakMonkey
15. BeforeEmily
16. Brdn_Nkd
17. Iacobus
18. Lechuza
19. OathMeal
20. TheUniter
21. Wild (I'll fuck you like a dog) man
22. Keanu Reeves
23. Flying_Buttmonkey
24. Leonore
25. Assholy
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IF YOUR NAME ISN'T ON THIS LIST, ADD IT!
Submitted by Linus (user info) at 2008-02-01 12:40:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
w00t
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-02-01 12:35:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
He's a beautiful baby boy :) No name as yet, going back in half an hour to tattoo 'EI' on his forhead.
Don't you wish your children had a role model like me :)
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-02-01 11:56:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
EI danced his way down the hall of the maternity ward, singing "Benny & The Jets" as loud as he could, but replacing key phrases with naughty words. He burst into his sister's room and proudly displayed to her the lovely bouquet of stolen hospital pens he had got for her. Fortunately, being of the same caliber mental capacity as EI, good 'ol sis found this right on.
"Where's this nephew of mine?" asked EI, hurling the pencils back out of the room and into a nurse passing by.
"Oh, here come's the little darling now! Have you thought of a middle name?"
"I'm thinking of 'Benjamin' for the wee scamper!" replied EL as he started to insert a Q-Tip into his ureathra.
"Hmmm, a bit unorthadox, but I can accept it," said his sister. "I've named the boy 'Bumbling!' Here's your nephew 'Bumbling Benjamin Impossible'."
"Splendid!" roared EL as he ritually doused the child in maple syrup and began to lick it off.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-02-01 11:38:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
who ARE you?
Submitted by ubetidid (user info) at 2008-02-01 11:31:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i like Maynard for a middle name.
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2008-02-01 11:26:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
FLIPPER-BOY!
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2008-02-01 11:14:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No not with my mum, spcifically. He would get naked with anyone. He had some strange condition where his cock was fused to his leg. They wouldnt operate until he was older. His parents had tried to make him comfortable with his body by saying it was alright for him to be naked. It really did fuck up as he would get naked everywhere.
Museums were a fun trip, and the fun we had in the Library was just brilliant.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-01 11:05:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2008-02-01 11:01:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:59:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Go with Berty. It's a well easy name for him to type into a keyboard.
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I knew a Berty once. He was pretty cool. Only he liked to get naked a lot. Actually he would get naked and bury his clothes and run around the play ground.
I often wonder what happened to him.
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He kept on getting naked, with your MOM!
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2008-02-01 11:01:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:59:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Go with Berty. It's a well easy name for him to type into a keyboard.
--
I knew a Berty once. He was pretty cool. Only he liked to get naked a lot. Actually he would get naked and bury his clothes and run around the play ground.
I often wonder what happened to him.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:59:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Go with Berty. It's a well easy name for him to type into a keyboard.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:58:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BENJAMIN PROPER-BERG! DE BIGGEST JUW IN TOWN, MON!
*expansive, double handed, gesture*
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:48:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Have a -1 for being so happy.
Submitted by BeforeEmily (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:46:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-01 07:33:06 PST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's not easy to juggle a pregnant sister and a troubled nephew, but
somehow I managed to squeeze in 8 hours of Uber a day.
-- EmissionImpossible
Baby's First Word
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Bwahaha!
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:43:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay, more humans on the planet. Call it Drogo, it's sure not to get him beaten up too badly at school.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:33:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's not easy to juggle a pregnant sister and a troubled nephew, but
somehow I managed to squeeze in 8 hours of Uber a day.
-- EmissionImpossible
Baby's First Word
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:32:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I think Hadley is a relatively splendid name.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:31:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Uncle EI. EI? Oh.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:27:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Make sure to do severe emotional and psychological damage!
:)
Submitted by BeforeEmily (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:25:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Benjamin is sweet. Congratulations!
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:19:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You should try Gangrenous as a name.
Submitted by Fartman (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:13:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Congrats. How about Mordred.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:12:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Aw, congrats, EI. Nephews are awesome.
I like Benjamin, too.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-02-01 10:10:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
congrats?
oh, alright
CONGRATULATIONS on the emergance of your sister's crotch fruit! WOOO!