Another Day in the Adventures of Young Drogo & Emission (604 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.3 on 32 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by kaos-king (antius777) (View user info) at 2008-02-11 07:42:28 EST
Drogo and Emission were bored.
Wee Drogo had once again been barred from his abode due to his mummy entertaining her guests. Since the incident when Drogo had not been able to find his short pants and had wandered into mummy's room to find three men engaging in the slick violation of her orifices for cash, Drogo had spent a lot of time barred. He didn't mind getting to spend more time outside, really. All those loud moans and screams gave him a headache. Plus, he thought, it gave him more opportunities to play with his best friend.
The individual who occupied most of Drogo massive amounts of free time was a young lad by the name of Emission. Like Drogo, Emission had also been cast out to the day by his parents, but not for any reasons of financial gain. No, Emission mum and dad couldn't handle much more than a few hours around the boy without going into a madness. Simply put, he was a bit of an excitable youngster.
For instance, as Drogo sat on a small rock along the alley, Emission ran up and down the length of it while bashing the side of his head into the fence every few feet.
"What do you want to do?" asked Drogo.
"Oi! Let's steal something and then burn it!" yelled Emission.
"Nah," replied Drogo, "We did that yesterday."
"Ohohoh! Let's catch something then kill it!" tried Emission.
"Nah," sighed Drogo, "We did that the day before."
"I know, I know! Let's build something and stick our willies into it!" exclaimed Emission.
Drogo turned and stared at his friend. "What?"
"I dunno..." said Emission with a shrug.
"I wonder what Red and Berty are doing..." trailed off Drogo, his chin clasped in his hands.
Occasionally Drogo and Emission would scamper down to the other end of town and see their friends. Berty was a odd lad and Red his brainy partner in crime. They often tormented those surrounding their neighborhood and when the four got together, general disaster usually occurred. A national state of emergency has been called once after Hurty and his gang had come down from another town to play.
"Fuck off, Red and Berty," said Emission. "I say we go spy on Orphy."
"You just say that 'cause you fancy her," replied Drogo with a roll of his eyes.
"HOW VERY DARE YOU!" screeched Emission, his hands on his hips.
Orphy was the little blonde girl who lived next door to Emission. It was common knowledge that Emission wanted nothing more than to tackle her and snog her into submission. Common knowledge, because he had told everyone as much, including her. For this very reason, poor Orphy was absolutely terrified of him.
Drogo was clever lad, however, and momentarily considered the ramifications of this terror.
"Hmmm..." said Drogo, looking at an outraged Emission from the corner of his eyes, "Perhaps you're right. Let's go find Orphy."
* * * * * * * * * *
Young Drogo and lil' Emission hid in the shrubbery outside Orphy's home. Drogo was trying to formulate a plan. He had to figure out a way to get the girl outside. The result would be the same, hysterical conclusion as always, but how to achieve it? Surely she wouldn't come out if she knew Emission was here, and Drogo had to figure out a way to...
"Hehehe, just like James Bond, eh mate?" whispered Emission shaking his fists.
Drogo pursed his lips. Emission acted like Orphy was nothing special at times like this, but once he saw her, he knew that would change. Young Drogo would simply have to engineer a situation. Behind the vegetation, he waited and plotted while Emission randomly broke little branches and made statements to the twigs like "Die, fiend!"
As it turned out, not much of a plan needed concocted.
Moments later, the front door flew open and from inside the boys heard, "Orphelia, I can't have you underfoot while I'm cleaning house! Go outside and play."
"But mummy!" screamed Orphy as the door slammed close onto her face. "HE might be out here!"
Drogo allowed a smile to creep onto his face. He sat back and counted to himself, waiting for it, waiting for her to make it onto the sidewalk. She had crept about four steps towards them before she noticed.
"I LUVER YOU!" screamed Emission at the top of his lungs as he dove upon the helpless girl.
Over the sounds of Orphy's blubbering cries of help and Emission's babbling admissions of eternal devotion, Drogo leaned back on his hands in the grass and considered what to do with the rest of his day.
User Reviews
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 15:05:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Are you an alter, below??
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-02-12 15:04:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HA!
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2008-02-12 09:13:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
there was the essence of rape.
as boobies here at ubersite garner a +ve rating, so does this subject
i do not endorse forceable intercourse (especially on an empty stomach), but mob rules dictate that i at least give you such a rating.
so there ya go...
Submitted by woolfe (user info) at 2008-02-12 05:03:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
circle
jerk
jerk
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-11 22:59:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BUNNIES
http://youtube.com/watch?v=dkLx068J-0k
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-02-11 22:56:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought you quit?
Anyway...it's good to read you.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-02-11 19:47:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
haha
Submitted by DreamWeaver (user info) at 2008-02-11 18:53:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay!
Submitted by jimboruckus (user info) at 2008-02-11 17:27:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:46:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:26:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-02-11 12:24:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"HOW VERY DARE YOU!" screeched Emission, his hands on his hips
-----------------
Consider this my response to this story.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-02-11 12:02:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
A national state of emergency has been called once after Hurty and his gang had come down from another town to play.
=======
Not surprising given that I'm a hooligan. Keep it foolish.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-02-11 11:46:32 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-11 10:42:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You keep doing these.
________________________
This was produced out of sheer boredom at 4am.
And the fact that the 'Drogo's mum is a whore' joke never gets unfunny...
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-11 10:42:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You keep doing these.
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2008-02-11 10:26:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-02-11 10:16:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was hilarious.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-11 09:46:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
GOLD
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-11 09:18:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ooh waaah ooooooh
ooh ooh
excitable boy
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-02-11 09:00:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not enough homicidal zombies.
I really am an asshole.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2008-02-11 08:30:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BRAND NEW KAOS KING
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-11 08:28:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't make it sound like I already sent some! I haven't!
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 08:22:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope orphelia commits suicide today because she feels guilty of not sending me tit pictures in a while.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-11 08:13:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope Drogo logs on today. Not on much recently.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-02-11 08:06:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
SiCo - - Damn it! I actually thought I had typo'ed that! Work was fun this weekend, but the bands all sucked...
Orphelia - - This is all true, you know. Poor Drogo...
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 08:05:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm still waiting to see your tits, cunt.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-11 08:03:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No way to speak to your unborn babys mother, sico.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 08:02:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Whore, below.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-11 08:01:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And +2 for me!
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 08:00:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Also, this line was gold: "For instance, as Drogo sat on a small cock along the alley..."
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-11 07:54:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahahahahaha
Especially haha @ Drogos mum.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 07:46:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Isn't this a little early for you to be up? Shouldn't you be sleeping in on the gov't dime?
*sorry, that was low*