Ubertines 08: Round 1 (Show Us Your) Pairs (2215 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 0.89 on 143 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Orgasmatron (View user info) at 2008-02-11 13:41:40 EST
Yes, this whole affair started late.
Yes, I know Valentine's Day is this Thursday.
Yes, I know this will likely end the first week of march.
But, like the 1,100lb man said to rescue workers as they carted him through a removed section of wall and onto a reinforced forklift, "Deal with me, I'm huge." You're going to smell what Ubertines is cooking and you're going to like it. You'll like it or else.
So the pairs for Round 1 are below, and here are some things to note:
- Round 1 stories are due this Thursday, 2/14 by 11:59PM Eastern. I know many of you will be able to make this deadline with no trouble since you'll be inside instead of out on dates or humping [insert male Uber user's name]'s mom.
- Each round's matchups will be posted on Mondays, posts will be due on Thursdays, and voting will end just before midnight on Sundays.
- We're starting with 20, and we'll whittle down to 10, 5, and then the two highest rated posters out of the remaining five will pair off at the end. Yes, much like you've paired off in [insert Uber user's name from above]'s mom's end with [insert witty pop culutre reference].
- This bracket will be used to create pairs until we get to the final two. Names were drawn at random from [insert unamusing name of hat/crevice/box/device/bowl here] and were seeded at random with the help of [insert equally as unamusing name of software/lottery roller/monkeybone/astrological map].
You're encouraged to give your opponent a title - I think it's a bit more fun that way - but if you want to just use your own title what the hell am I going to do to stop you? If your pair wants to exchange, cool. If you want to use your own, go for it. Just write something original, write it yourself, and make it something to do with the elements/themes/trappings of this holiday, ok? If you're new to this and have questions feel free to leave them below.
Love,
Orgasmahitler
User Reviews
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-18 10:40:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
http://www.ubersite.com/m/115056
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-02-18 10:24:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
THANK GOODNESS!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-18 10:05:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Uber auto-completed "ubertines08" for me when I went to label HBTS's and sico's posts, but I must have spaced over instead of tabbed because I just found them labeled as "ub." Sorry about that. It's fixed now.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-02-17 23:44:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-16 11:19:50 GMT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't see Hurty in the Ubertines '08 list on your labels page.
Just thought I'd let you know.
========
Seriously, what the hell?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-17 18:59:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-16 06:19:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't see Hurty in the Ubertines '08 list on your labels page.
Just thought I'd let you know.
============
Nor was Sicko The Semen Dude.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-16 06:19:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't see Hurty in the Ubertines '08 list on your labels page.
Just thought I'd let you know.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-15 16:39:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Get your readin' on:
http://www.ubersite.com/u/Orgasmatron/l/ubertines08
Submitted by EkO (user info) at 2008-02-15 09:52:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I forfeit this and any subsequent round. I would like Brdn_Nkd to take my place.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2008-02-14 19:39:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/115003
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-02-14 15:47:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
15 seconds?
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-14 15:36:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
HAHAH, STFU Brdn :) You're just mad because you only got 15 seconds.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-02-14 15:22:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-14 13:07:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://members.iinet.net.au/~pontipak/redsquare.html
My best is 21.484 seconds.
If you beat that, than your vote counts. I had a pretty good lunch, thanks for asking.
It's 'then' not 'than'
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-02-14 14:48:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
nuuurr
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114943
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2008-02-14 14:35:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114988
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-02-14 14:27:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
oh, I didnt know we were supposed to link stuff... makes sense.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114952
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-14 14:10:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
R1 entry - "Anything For You": http://www.ubersite.com/m/114986
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-14 13:48:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Here you go, sweetcheeks!
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114985
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-14 13:43:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm going to play the shit out of that game later.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-14 13:07:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://members.iinet.net.au/~pontipak/redsquare.html
My best is 21.484 seconds.
If you beat that, than your vote counts. I had a pretty good lunch, thanks for asking.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-14 12:39:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Are you sure it was sarcasm? Do you know what sarcasm means? Because I didn't read anything that fit the definition of sarcasm there, dearest.
Should we take a vote on which of us sounds more like a bleeding cunt?
I vote you.
Now you vote while I get back to writing my shittty post.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-14 12:29:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sac, it's called sarcasm. Look into instead of being a cunt, for cunts sake.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-14 12:13:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-14 10:57:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Nothing, O. I already submitted a written entry under another name. Or are you just -2ing me to guarantee your e-crush will win? That's okay if you are but don't pretend that writing or doing anything other than posting was a requirement.
===
You think I need him to rate you to win a no-prize internet contest?
I can't figure out why someone as easily amused as you are makes such an effort when it comes to gay internet drama.
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2008-02-14 12:09:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-12 20:36:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-12 20:20:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
paedo below
===========
Willie, are you really as dumb as you are ugly?????????????????????????????????????????????????
COWMAN!!!!!!!!!! ARE WE posting our own titles???
ANSWER ME, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
_____________
Lets. Expect mine this evening.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-14 11:45:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Man, this is the worst "contest" in internet history.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-02-14 11:39:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114982
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-02-14 11:33:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, mine: http://www.ubersite.com/m/114958
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-14 10:57:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Nothing, O. I already submitted a written entry under another name. Or are you just -2ing me to guarantee your e-crush will win? That's okay if you are but don't pretend that writing or doing anything other than posting was a requirement.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-13 19:48:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114964 my rubbish.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2008-02-13 18:46:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-13 11:46:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
sacrilicious (because simon is a no talent retard and even if he wasn't i'd cheat to make SURE he lost just to hear him whine repeatedly for the next few months about how little it meant and anyway he MEANT to lose and also yeah huh that is what that word means oh wait your dictionary.com definition just proved me wrong here's me dressed like a wigger sluts cocks poop sluts blah blah fucking blah just stick your head in an oven and get it over with)
--
*roars laughter, doesn't care who hears it*
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-02-13 18:22:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-12 19:15:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Everybody should just make a valentines post due on VALENTINES DAY and the highest rated post wins.
Why the fuck you need all these brackets so that a VALENTINES contest ends around Memorial Day is beyond me.
JUST GET ON WITH IT MOTHERFUCKERS
You all blow your off-line wads prematurely, why drag things out here?
---
HAHAHA
God bless you Willard.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-13 16:07:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I would also like to point out that when I originally read the word "Ubertines" I thought it was a play on Libertine, with an "eee" sound.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-02-13 14:40:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-13 13:41:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bart always wins....
--
Yeah, which one is us is bart? am I bart? are you?
are... are we all bart?
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-02-13 14:12:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Here's mine: http://www.ubersite.com/m/114955
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-13 13:44:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If I'm ever that desperate for attention, please shoot me.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-13 13:41:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bart always wins....
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-13 13:34:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-13 11:46:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
my picks to win by contest:
darko
wardy
sacrilicious (because simon is a no talent retard and even if he wasn't i'd cheat to make SURE he lost just to hear him whine repeatedly for the next few months about how little it meant and anyway he MEANT to lose and also yeah huh that is what that word means oh wait your dictionary.com definition just proved me wrong here's me dressed like a wigger sluts cocks poop sluts blah blah fucking blah just stick your head in an oven and get it over with)
double forfeit
steak
brd-nkd
yawnfest either way
nuggsie
fungah
bart
===========
Scourge, I didn't know you cared so much. Since I've already cheated in this competition it's flawed. I'm also going to cheat because I'm going to have a 15 year old girl write something or make a picture or draw or who the fuck cares! I'm cheating and openly admit it.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-13 13:30:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Nevermind scourge, orph, he's probably just bleeding from his unders today.
I'll make him bleed more later. From the face and hard. Courtesy of my mighty soupbone punches.
Speaking of unders-stains, I wonder if "Cremens" has soiled his suitbottoms today from all the time spent in the Congressional hot seat.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-13 13:22:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
All I am saying is I don't see how you can make any kind of prediction until all first round entries are submitted you funny review writing man. (I have no insults). (Today).
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-13 13:20:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
it was a prediction you airbrushed hooker. no need to get all hormoanlly stressed about it.
i guarantee you i will +2 whatever you write...maybe even without reading it!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-13 13:17:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
would it make you happy to fight about it? 'cause, you know...
be warned that i am leaving and won't read your answer for a number of hours, so if it is 'yes', you should do some bench presses or something to keep you pumped for the fight until i get back.
maybe some jump rope or push-ups?
whatever keeps the killer edge on.
BACK SOON, LITTLE BLACK SAMBO!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-13 13:17:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
my picks to win by contest:
darko
wardy
---------
Should I bother submitting?
Are these predictions based on talent or popularity?
Just wonderin'
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-13 13:10:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't love them either. Wanna fight about it?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-13 12:50:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm not sure i love your titles.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-13 12:22:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Cowabunga dude! Awesome!
I hope you have a good time too!
It happies me to offer you the following titles:
Happy Happy, Joy Joy
I Feel So Fucking Happy It Hurts
Sleep In My Love Aftermath
A Heart as a Head as a Heart
Love Tears and Thirteen Beers
Balls! It's Valentine's Day
Clemens in Japanese is Cremens
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-13 12:13:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
well i DID offer them the option of giving me a title as long as doing it was something that made them happy.
as far as that goes, they don't have to use mine if doing THAT makes them happy. they can create their own or use something like 'scourge is a dirty faggot hippy' if they want. i'm easygoing.
i'm just here to make sure everyone has a good time. a +2 filled time of awesomeness and joy with titles or no titles and posts or no posts.
as long as everybody is happy.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-13 11:59:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
scourge,
Your mystery opponent must have gotten confused after reading this:
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-11 15:43:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
to the lucky person who is destined to be my opponent, your title is 'a busy day at jack's garage'
my title will also be 'a busy day at jack's garage', so don't bother supplying me one. unless doing so provides you with some happiness, because then, go ahead and do it as i'm all about people being happy.
If you've changed your mind and want one now I can give you one.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-13 11:46:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
my picks to win by contest:
darko
wardy
sacrilicious (because simon is a no talent retard and even if he wasn't i'd cheat to make SURE he lost just to hear him whine repeatedly for the next few months about how little it meant and anyway he MEANT to lose and also yeah huh that is what that word means oh wait your dictionary.com definition just proved me wrong here's me dressed like a wigger sluts cocks poop sluts blah blah fucking blah just stick your head in an oven and get it over with)
double forfeit
steak
brd-nkd
yawnfest either way
nuggsie
fungah
bart
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-13 11:37:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
is my mystery opponent going to give me a title to completely ignore or not?
am i competing against the friendly poet, or against the deli meat addicted 'tard? this is important info when deciding exactly HOW i am going to forfeit.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-13 11:15:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
http://www.ubersite.com/u/Orgasmatron/l/ubertines08
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-13 09:55:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-02-12 22:26:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll show you mine if you show me yours ;)
---
Reciprocity, Ms. Netimportant, is the key to every relationship.
NAME THAT MOVIE
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-13 09:15:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2008-02-13 01:06:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yo check me out.
I'm flying to Baltimore on Friday, taking a train immediately to D.C., then taking a bus to New York City for the weekend. Then train back to D.C. and flying out of Baltimore Wednesday.
Anyone gonna be in any of those places?
If so, seriously, check me out.
===
You're passing right by me near Philly- get off the bus, Gus!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-13 09:07:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yo, Mr. Fungah...time is running out here, so let's just run with our own titles. If that's not cool by you, drop me a note and let me know...
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-13 08:49:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ROFLMAO at below
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-02-13 02:37:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hurty vs steak?
It'll be like watching two retards tryin' to fuck a doorknob
*waits for outrage*
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2008-02-13 01:06:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yo check me out.
I'm flying to Baltimore on Friday, taking a train immediately to D.C., then taking a bus to New York City for the weekend. Then train back to D.C. and flying out of Baltimore Wednesday.
Anyone gonna be in any of those places?
If so, seriously, check me out.
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-02-12 22:26:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll show you mine if you show me yours ;)
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-12 21:21:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114941
My submission.
The end.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2008-02-12 20:45:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I won this last year. My geode must be acknowledged.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-12 20:36:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-12 20:20:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
paedo below
===========
Willie, are you really as dumb as you are ugly?????????????????????????????????????????????????
COWMAN!!!!!!!!!! ARE WE posting our own titles???
ANSWER ME, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-12 20:20:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
paedo below
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-12 20:05:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-12 19:15:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Everybody should just make a valentines post due on VALENTINES DAY and the highest rated post wins.
Why the fuck you need all these brackets so that a VALENTINES contest ends around Memorial Day is beyond me.
JUST GET ON WITH IT MOTHERFUCKERS
You all blow your off-line wads prematurely, why drag things out here?
=====================
We need these brackets to pacify the needs of the non-literati on the site.
Fuck you, Willie. You are a dipshit.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-12 20:03:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
An uberboard link for a good cause? Imagine that.
Kiva rocks.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-12 19:15:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Everybody should just make a valentines post due on VALENTINES DAY and the highest rated post wins.
Why the fuck you need all these brackets so that a VALENTINES contest ends around Memorial Day is beyond me.
JUST GET ON WITH IT MOTHERFUCKERS
You all blow your off-line wads prematurely, why drag things out here?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-12 18:19:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 15:10:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm more of a Holiday Inn gal. Classy like that.
===========
I would've guessed the No-Tell Motel.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 15:10:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm more of a Holiday Inn gal. Classy like that.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-12 15:09:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 13:01:21 CST (#)
Ranking: 2
Howard Johnson the 80's pop star?
----------------------
Um, no. Howard Johnson, the now-extinct shitty motel chain that once PWNED the USA.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 15:03:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Half the time, saccy, I have no idea what I mean.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-12 14:32:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-12 14:10:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I loved this song back in the day. Someone recently did a shitty cover of it if the radio in the drugstore is any indication.
--------------------------------------------
I worked at a Food Lion once, in the perishables department, with my hands constantly frozen and cracking from the ice cream bin.
One of the most depressing things I've ever heard, was a muzak cover of Lynard Skynard's "Teusday's Gone."
It was then that I decided to purify the earth with fire, and my fascination with viral engineering became such a focal point of my life.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-12 14:10:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think you meant Howard Jones.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Fiba80YVyM
I loved this song back in the day. Someone recently did a shitty cover of it if the radio in the drugstore is any indication.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 14:01:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Howard Johnson the 80's pop star?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-12 13:43:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-12 11:28:43 CST (#)
Ranking: 1
Get a room, you two. This isn't a Motel 6.
------------------------------
You're right. It's more like a Howard Johnson.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-02-12 13:35:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i don't remember what I'm reviewing. because of that, and being the loving individual I am, I offer the author these words. If I were a booger I'd pick you first. my lips are like skittles, wanna taste the rainbow?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-12 12:47:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Oh and do reference Ubertines in your post title, please.
And do the whole 'link the post on the hub' thing that's been all the rage for the last handful of years.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-12 12:28:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Get a room, you two. This isn't a Motel 6.
Orph you can stay if you show us your pairs, as instructed in the post's title.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 12:08:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*looks down*
OMG I have tits? Well, I'll be damned. Thats me entertained for the next 3 hours... :)
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-12 12:07:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 11:05:27 CST (#)
Ranking: 0
What are you, a human clock?! tee hee. You have one of those nerdy world time zones watches don't you?
--------------------
No, I went to http://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/ and did the math...
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-12 12:06:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Although it would appear that you may have a better chance than I, young orphelia, given that apparently I cannot read.
And you also apparently have tits. That helps.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 12:05:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
What are you, a human clock?! tee hee. You have one of those nerdy world time zones watches don't you?
Thanks anyway!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-12 12:04:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 11:02:07 CST (#)
Ranking: 0
hehehe it took me 10 minutes to work out 7pm too :(
------------------------
Yeah, you figured the correct difference, just in the wrong direction. Since your locale is ahead of EST, you add 5 hours, not subtract.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-12 12:02:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Correction: make that 4:59am Fri 15-Feb for the UK. Just noticed that O-Man posted the deadline in EST, but I'm a time zone behind that...
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 12:02:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hehehe it took me 10 minutes to work out 7pm too :(
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 12:01:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
CT - you lie, you are just trying to scupper my chances of winning this popularity/writing contest.
But thanks all the same, hairy chest.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-12 11:56:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 10:06:31 CST (#)
Ranking: 2
So is that 7pm GMT on thurs for the English cut off?
----------------------------------------------------
No, the deadline for the UK contingency would be 5:59am, Friday 15-Feb. (Which is GMT.)
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2008-02-12 11:46:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-12 09:44:17 CST (#)
Ranking: 1
Your own, likely.
***
Don't make it so easy on me.
Bubba, I've seen how you write. No offense.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-12 11:10:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2008-02-12 09:41:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You're effectively blowing your wad by having me and corn_nugget against each other in the first round. Whose dick would I have had to suck to get matched up with Bubba?
=======
AJ, do you really think you're that good, or are you banking on everyone -2ing me?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-12 11:06:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
So is that 7pm GMT on thurs for the English cut off?
I am terribly confused by World Time Zones and I can't ask Hurty, he is out horse riding. Ledgers death hit him very hard.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-12 10:44:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Your own, likely.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2008-02-12 09:41:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You're effectively blowing your wad by having me and corn_nugget against each other in the first round. Whose dick would I have had to suck to get matched up with Bubba?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-12 09:28:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Funagah, got any titles for me yet, or do you want to go on our own?
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-12 09:11:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Anyone have Ballare's email address, so I can find out what I'm doing?
I'm giving her 8 hours to respond, or when I get off work I'm going to start working on a title of my own devising.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-12 01:14:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's just 100% steak here.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 22:20:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Doesn't matter whether it's Steak or cowfuck, I need an answer by Noon tomorrow, EST. . .
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 21:21:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-11 20:50:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 20:26:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 16:17:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sir_Cowman, l-l-l-lets do it! I prefer to use my own title, but I'll leave that decision up to you.
===============
OK, I lied. Wah. I WILL NOT use orchestrated titles. They ALWAYS suck.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You saying my title isn't good?
Here's something new. YOU'RE FAT.
==============
Either this was a good joke or some dipshit forgot to log out. . . .
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 21:20:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-11 20:50:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 20:26:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 16:17:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sir_Cowman, l-l-l-lets do it! I prefer to use my own title, but I'll leave that decision up to you.
===============
OK, I lied. Wah. I WILL NOT use orchestrated titles. They ALWAYS suck.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You saying my title isn't good?
Here's something new. YOU'RE FAT.
=================
Well, I was rollin' down the highway in some old 44's
I had my weenie hangin'old of my big old drawers,
I'm FAT, I'm nation wide. . . .
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 21:00:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-11 20:50:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 20:26:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 16:17:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sir_Cowman, l-l-l-lets do it! I prefer to use my own title, but I'll leave that decision up to you.
===============
OK, I lied. Wah. I WILL NOT use orchestrated titles. They ALWAYS suck.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You saying my title isn't good?
Here's something new. YOU'RE FAT.
======================
OK, shitboy. 6'4" and 205. That ain't fat. BTW, are you the Cowman? If not, stfu.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-11 20:50:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 20:26:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 16:17:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sir_Cowman, l-l-l-lets do it! I prefer to use my own title, but I'll leave that decision up to you.
===============
OK, I lied. Wah. I WILL NOT use orchestrated titles. They ALWAYS suck.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You saying my title isn't good?
Here's something new. YOU'RE FAT.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 20:26:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 16:17:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sir_Cowman, l-l-l-lets do it! I prefer to use my own title, but I'll leave that decision up to you.
===============
OK, I lied. Wah. I WILL NOT use orchestrated titles. They ALWAYS suck.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 20:06:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Herr-Cowman....
From Orgasmatron:
You're encouraged to give your opponent a title - I think it's a bit more fun that way - but if you want to just use your own title what the hell am I going to do to stop you? If your pair wants to exchange, cool. If you want to use your own, go for it. Just write something original, write it yourself, and make it something to do with the elements/themes/trappings of this holiday, ok? If you're new to this and have questions feel free to leave them below.
+++++++++++++++++++
I remain unimpressed by your titles. I have none for you. Either we post our own writing under our own headings, or you win, hands down. :)
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2008-02-11 19:48:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You can't use your own title. That destroys the competition! Here are a few for you.
Ain't No Mountain High Enough
NyQuil Lovers
Post-it
Gimme a couple sometime soon. i needs to get writing.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-02-11 17:36:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EkO (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:54:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Brdn_Nkd,
Throwing Stones at a Glass Heart
My Cousin, My Lover
-or-
Cupid Has Terrible Aim
nice selection
for you to poop on:
Heart in a handbag
love in an elevator
Country lovin
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-11 16:31:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you Darko, I shall set to work! Good luck :)
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2008-02-11 16:28:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Let's see what I can come up with.
It Could Have Been a Country Song
Girlfriend (or Boyfriend, you pick) Got Ran Over By a Flower Delivery Truck
A Mouthful of Chalky Hearts
Erection!
Serenading Someone Can Be Difficult
My Ex Is Already Dating Someone New, I can't fucking stand it. I know I broke up with her but damn I was holding out hope that we might get back together maybe somehow. Gah, this fucking sucks.
Ok, that last one isn't so much a title as it is something I'm going through.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 16:23:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
<drags up ancient shit>
By 11:59 EST, do you simply mean "before midnight?" Or is it late at 11:59: 45?
:)
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 16:17:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sir_Cowman, l-l-l-lets do it! I prefer to use my own title, but I'll leave that decision up to you.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-11 16:09:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent.
Darko - Michael Bolton Killed My Valentine
Finding Love, Losing My Cherry
The Tale of the Liquorice Panties
Cupids Curse
Or your own, mine are not very good. Can I have some suggestions please.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-11 15:43:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
to the lucky person who is destined to be my opponent, your title is 'a busy day at jack's garage'
my title will also be 'a busy day at jack's garage', so don't bother supplying me one. unless doing so provides you with some happiness, because then, go ahead and do it as i'm all about people being happy.
happiness is pretty kickass.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-11 15:36:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
haha below.
who knows shlongy? everybody is vying to go against my first round forfeit...maybe you could make a claim on that bye to the second round as well?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-11 15:22:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
IS IT TOO LATE FOR SHLONGY TO GET IN ON THIS ACTION???
THIS LOOKS FUN!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-11 15:11:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
as long as it's not cumming ON me, we're cool.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-11 15:11:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
coming onto me
haha
FAGS
zing!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-11 15:09:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:53:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:36:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i have to admit....taking a spot against scourge's first round forfeit sounds nice....I'll pass and just look forward to reading some good posts.
---
Well, think about it. If you really want in on this let me know by the end of the day - my spot's still yours if you want it. Like I want to go up against scourge's forfeit. It'll likely get a 1.98 overall rating, with over 80% of that coming from four users. One of them being me.
---
fuck.
it looks like you guys are on to me.
Submitted by EkO (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:54:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Brdn_Nkd,
Throwing Stones at a Glass Heart
My Cousin, My Lover
-or-
Cupid Has Terrible Aim
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:53:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:36:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i have to admit....taking a spot against scourge's first round forfeit sounds nice....I'll pass and just look forward to reading some good posts.
---
Well, think about it. If you really want in on this let me know by the end of the day - my spot's still yours if you want it. Like I want to go up against scourge's forfeit. It'll likely get a 1.98 overall rating, with over 80% of that coming from four users. One of them being me.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:51:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:21:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:14:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jesus Christ. Why'd you even sign up, you geriatric shit shaker? Has anyone forfeited before the contest started or did Bubba set a record?
---
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:11:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:03:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
that's so fucked up man....seriously I added a review right after that that said something like 'shit I forgot, i'm in" and ubersite didn't post it.
fuck
this has happened to me a few times...I really wanted in on this one...I haven't written anything in a while and was looking forward to this.
fuck
---
1) The only reason I asked O-Man to run this was to see some actual writing.
2) I could write the finest story in history and still get a -3.
3) I bequeath my place to MudWhistle. He wants to write and I won't bother.
4) Thanks. Go get 'em, Muddy.
---
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:06:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Muddy...you can take my spot so you don't cry.
---
Your review precedes mine,I believe. . .
-----------------------------------------------
BUBBOWNED!
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:46:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
They are perfect. I will win this flawed competition yet.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:45:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sico- titles from my music collection include
Another First Kiss
She Came in Through the Bathroom Window
I Am Trying to Break Your Heart
Do they work for you?
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:36:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i have to admit....taking a spot against scourge's first round forfeit sounds nice....I'll pass and just look forward to reading some good posts.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:25:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
AJ! Yay. I might actually lose first round!
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:23:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
ffs cant people just get on with a competition instead of moaning and blubbering.
grow up!!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:23:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
GEEZ. If I don't get knocked out of the first round by Mr. Danosaurus, I'm CERTAIN to lose to one of the laureates in Round Deux.
But you can bet I won't go down without a fight, or a shortage of Viagra.
Fungah - here are your title choices, if you so choose, or pick your own. I'm easy.
- Green Tea For Two
- Love Lotion No. 9
- Balls o' Furry
- Stoopid Cupid
- She Rode Your WHAT?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:21:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Look, Mud, if you're serious about doing this and you really were left off b/c of some internet fuck up then you can take my spot.
There's no sense in anyone else who's signed up to drop out, since they wouldn't have signed up if they didn't have interest in it. I can just observe and 'manage' this whole affair, which is fine. If you're legit, it's yours.
Sico/Bubba, please decide sooner or later if you're going to stay or leave. If you're only dropping out because of MudWhistle then see above. If you'd rather not do it anymore then these slots could be filled by others. Ha...slots.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:21:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:14:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jesus Christ. Why'd you even sign up, you geriatric shit shaker? Has anyone forfeited before the contest started or did Bubba set a record?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:11:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:03:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
that's so fucked up man....seriously I added a review right after that that said something like 'shit I forgot, i'm in" and ubersite didn't post it.
fuck
this has happened to me a few times...I really wanted in on this one...I haven't written anything in a while and was looking forward to this.
fuck
============
1) The only reason I asked O-Man to run this was to see some actual writing.
2) I could write the finest story in history and still get a -3.
3) I bequeath my place to MudWhistle. He wants to write and I won't bother.
4) Thanks. Go get 'em, Muddy.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:06:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Muddy...you can take my spot so you don't cry.
===================
Your review precedes mine,I believe. . .
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:17:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think stickinthemud is actually crying.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:15:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:59:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Also to O- How are these going to be voted? By ratings or concensus? Special "vote" post?
---
Highest rated post takes the day, so everyone should buy plenty of Alter-B-Gone.
The spray, not the lotion, seems to work best.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:55:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
so the rules are that the post must be related to the holiday of valentine's day? that's it?
---
As long as it's original, done by you, and written, I don't give a damn if it's a .gif, a song, a video, or a good ol' vanilla olde tyme post. If you're going to use other media be sure to post the text that was created for it. This is about words, but I don't care what you do with them.
I'd like to think that good taste and common sense would prevail, but I can't forget where this is all going down now can I?
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:14:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jesus Christ. Why'd you even sign up, you geriatric shit shaker? Has anyone forfeited before the contest started or did Bubba set a record?
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:14:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:11:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Boo hoo Muddy, might I suggest you drown your sorrows in a pack or five of uncooked franks?
Feel free to contact Bart and ask him what's happening to all of these replies that have failed to post. Sounds like a terrible problem plaguing 0.001% of users.
=====
you know...I wasn't on here begging or pleading, ballsack, I was just stating what happened in a 'oh such is life i'm moving on' sort of way so congrats on coming out and looking like a total blowjob.
have a good one, insignificant.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:11:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:03:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
that's so fucked up man....seriously I added a review right after that that said something like 'shit I forgot, i'm in" and ubersite didn't post it.
fuck
this has happened to me a few times...I really wanted in on this one...I haven't written anything in a while and was looking forward to this.
fuck
============
1) The only reason I asked O-Man to run this was to see some actual writing.
2) I could write the finest story in history and still get a -3.
3) I bequeath my place to MudWhistle. He wants to write and I won't bother.
4) Thanks. Go get 'em, Muddy.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:11:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Boo hoo Muddy, might I suggest you drown your sorrows in a pack or five of uncooked franks?
Feel free to contact Bart and ask him what's happening to all of these replies that have failed to post. Sounds like a terrible problem plaguing 0.001% of users.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:06:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
steak you have hurty, the only way it would of been easier would of been if i had entered this.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:06:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Muddy...you can take my spot so you don't cry.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:05:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Cancel this piece of shit and save yourself the time, money, and idiocy.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:04:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hurty, yours is "I Can't Love You From Fifty Yards: A Stalker's Folly" if you so wish.
Why didn't I get somebody easier, like Bubba? It's like a free pass to the next round.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:03:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
that's so fucked up man....seriously I added a review right after that that said something like 'shit I forgot, i'm in" and ubersite didn't post it.
fuck
this has happened to me a few times...I really wanted in on this one...I haven't written anything in a while and was looking forward to this.
fuck
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:01:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:45:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
hello....even after deciphering your shitty font...I still don't see my name on there?
---
Maybe I'd have included you if you'd actually said you wanted to participate:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114809#2645136
Doesn't say much in the way of "I'm in" or "No thanks" does it?
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 14:00:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok ok... choose from these 3.
Stone Passion
St. Valentine the Fraud
A Cupid Hangover
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:59:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Also to O- How are these going to be voted? By ratings or concensus? Special "vote" post?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:58:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's up to you, sico, but if we exchange I want less shitty choices. Serious Writer's Forum to uphold and all that!
Which would you prefer?
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:56:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have an awesome opponent, and though I'd like to make it hard on her, I think the title I've come up with is too good to pass up, easy as it may make it.
Ballare, your title is "Love in the Time of Ebola", and if you'll agree, it should be based in Africa, mid 90's, in a refugee camp.
Should be interesting, and heartwarming.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:55:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
so the rules are that the post must be related to the holiday of valentine's day? that's it?
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:50:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Start typing, motafookahs!
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:50:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Great, both my alter and I have tough opponents. Saccy, we exchanging titles or just winging it?
If so, here are your titles to choose from:
Vulva Pounder With Cheese
Valentines Day Makes Me Cry
Eat Shit: A Coprophiliac Expository
Heart Attacks
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:45:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
That heart picture is fucking cool.
Steak, if you fancy it use: "The Hand That Feeds: A Heartwarming Tale of Cannibal Love"
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-11 13:45:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
hello....even after deciphering your shitty font...I still don't see my name on there?