I may be a physical mutant/freak?? (1122 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.47 on 61 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Axolotl (View user info) at 2008-02-18 16:32:11 EST
Question:
My right forearm is larger than my left forearm. Not in a freakish/malproportioned way that would make the "normals" try to induct me into circus sideshow, but it's noticable. One of my forearms is skinnier than the other, which is normal size.
My theory is that because I'm right-handed, the tendons or muscles of my right arm are used far more often, leading to this hideous deformity in my body.
So what do you think? Is my theory correct?
Are there any local circuses I can join?????
There's always a means of profiting off bad luck.
User Reviews
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2008-02-20 17:33:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
heh, his tail looks like a propeller
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-19 19:34:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2008-02-19 16:15:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Mine are the same size.
-----------------------------------------------
Do you masturbate with both hands? Lucky you, I usually need one free hand to hold up the wall while I wack off over the toilet. I find that it makes clean-up much easier.
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2008-02-19 16:15:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Mine are the same size.
Submitted by Fartman (user info) at 2008-02-19 09:55:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You've obviously never heard of Guillermo Vilas.
http://www.sporting-heroes.net/tennis-heroes/displayhero.asp?HeroID=387
Before players like Connors, Borg and Chris Evert popularized the two-handed backhand, it was very common. Rod Laver was said to have the largest forearm but Vilas' was actually larger. I'm sure that you've got nothing on him.
Submitted by BritishBeef (user info) at 2008-02-19 08:43:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
"way to go genius. you just managed to uncover the baffling secret of 'i used some muscles more than others and they got bigger'."
Nice gif
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-02-19 07:10:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
way to go genius. you just managed to uncover the baffling secret of 'i used some muscles more than others and they got bigger'.
i knew a guy who played tennis a SHITLOAD and his right forearm was so much bigger he looked like a soldier crab.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-02-19 00:25:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It does mean that you're jackong off tpp much...elroy.
Im drunk...so pvcffffttt;shnl;kshndfsd
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2008-02-19 00:13:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
DANCE CLOG-BOY, DANCE
Submitted by ConorJS (user info) at 2008-02-18 23:55:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
That cat looks a lot like mine. My cat is pretty cool for a little piece of shit.
Hit the gym, you pussy. Everyone is called "pussy" when I'm talking about excercise, don't take it personally. I used to have a right side that was noticeably (to paranoid body dismorphic disorder me) bigger than my left. I then discovered the wonders that free-weight bench pressing can work for your chest and arms. For forearms? Every joke about jerking off has been made, but pull ups are your bud for forearm strength.
There was an extremely relevant cartoon I saw from National Lampoon that I can't find right now that I wanted to link. Fuck it.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-02-18 23:55:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
*you're
chafing my loins
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-02-18 23:26:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-02-18 19:38:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My left nut hangs a good 1/4 inch lower than my right one. I haven't been able to enjoy oral since this was pointed out to me.
----
You're made that way, um, Nummy, so your boys don't knock each other about when your running around, or whatever it is that you do.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 21:57:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
apollo88: I'm fairly active, I was mostly referring to me only writing with my right hand, and writing a lot (school, etc)
And for the most part this post was a joke. The difference is so small as to be unrecognizable. Nobody is perfectly symmetric anyway
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2008-02-18 20:50:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
FREAK
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-02-18 20:47:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
My theory is that because I'm right-handed, the tendons or muscles of my right arm are used far more often, leading to this hideous deformity in my body.
only if you are generally very fucking inactive.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-18 19:54:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jesus Christ Doodles.
Your balls aren't supposed to hang symmetrically.
I love how high schoolers and other virgins pretend to know about sex.
Question:
How many holes does a woman have between her legs?
NOBODY TELL HIM
If you get it right I'll tell you how to properly clean yourself so you might actually get a blow job one day.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-02-18 19:38:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My left nut hangs a good 1/4 inch lower than my right one. I haven't been able to enjoy oral since this was pointed out to me.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-02-18 19:32:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
God bless that cat.
Also
God bless jerking off.
Also
um.
No that's it.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-02-18 19:17:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm gonna guess you open the spinach cans with your right arm.
Submitted by cat_head (user info) at 2008-02-18 19:12:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I can't believe that cat made that jump.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-18 19:05:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I GOTTA start reading the reviews before I type...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-18 19:04:27 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
IT MEANS YOU'RE JACKING OFF TOO MUCH, ELROY.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-18 18:30:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Everyone has one arm larger than the other, or so I'm told.
Which arm is it and are you right or left handed?
Submitted by bjrog2 (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:45:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Stop masturbating then
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:22:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ah schucks. i need inspiration.
i'm the most inoffensive person i know.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:18:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
better safe than sorry
i'll accept payment in the form of you posting something offensive to the world at large
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:16:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hmmm yeah i think i'd better get it checked. i don't want that free loading bitch taking advantage of me.
thanks dr. ax.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:14:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
yea that's probably it then. although depending on exactly HOW big it is, it may be cookie lass just burrowing down in your scrotum for winter warmth like a bear.
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:13:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
do you mean cookielass?
oh, cancer?
nah, it's probably something to do with taking a curve ball to the groin.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:07:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:06:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hmmm i have a similar problem. my left nut is twice the size of its companion.
------
Have you got it checked for the big C?
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:06:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hmmm i have a similar problem. my left nut is twice the size of its companion.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:03:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't think anyone needs a translator fot the exchange below.
Somebubba has a crush on Axolotl.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:02:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:00:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:58:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:56:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ax, ignoring the thread makes you look REALLY stupid. OK, dipshit, do you remember who called you The Boy Genius? Well?
------
probably Kaos King.
==========
Give the Retard a fucking teddy bear!! He's not QUITE as dumb as he appears.
---------
lol you're so hostile...would you read that comment in front of your grandchildren? (who are probably my age)?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 17:00:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:58:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:56:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ax, ignoring the thread makes you look REALLY stupid. OK, dipshit, do you remember who called you The Boy Genius? Well?
------
probably Kaos King.
==========
Give the Retard a fucking teddy bear!! He's not QUITE as dumb as he appears.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:58:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:56:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ax, ignoring the thread makes you look REALLY stupid. OK, dipshit, do you remember who called you The Boy Genius? Well?
------
probably Kaos King.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:56:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ax, ignoring the thread makes you look REALLY stupid. OK, dipshit, do you remember who called you The Boy Genius? Well?
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:55:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sick.little.weasel (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:37:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
My guess is that you spend an unnatural amount of time jacking off. Since you are right-handed and the jack-off muscles are in your forearm, your right forearm is bigger due to a vigorous work-out routine. I would tell you to switch it up and use the left. Your jack-off muscles will even out and the curve in your dick will straighten out as well. However, DO NOT HAVE SEX. This will ruin the routine for your left and you will remain a freak forever. Plus, we dont want any little freaks running around by accident.
---------
I am right-handed and yet use my left, go figure. I think it's something to do with the way I position myself so I can still use the mouse.
And Axolotl: he's probably right.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:54:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:53:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:43:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:42:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:40:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:39:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nice heat try
------
wtf are you talking about?
go back to writing underage erotica
===============
So much for you being the boy genius, You can't even read.
-------
who said I was a boy genius?
PS: I'm clearly reading these replies and responses. oh snap!
---------------
Jesus!! If you don't recall who called you a boy genius, then you sure aren't one....
Dumbass.
------------
Lol circular reasoning. No true scotsman, etcc...
I'm smart enough to know to stay away from 60-year-old men who write stories about sex with children. Gross.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:53:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:43:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:42:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:40:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:39:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nice heat try
------
wtf are you talking about?
go back to writing underage erotica
===============
So much for you being the boy genius, You can't even read.
-------
who said I was a boy genius?
PS: I'm clearly reading these replies and responses. oh snap!
---------------
Jesus!! If you don't recall who called you a boy genius, then you sure aren't one....
Dumbass.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:50:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:49:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
thank you +2
----
yer welcome
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:49:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
thank you +2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:47:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:39:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nice heat try. do you want to go to a private chat? d-prime just loves it!
=========================
This review brought to you by the Bubba2341Translator ™
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:45:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:43:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:37:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I honestly never considered the masturbation corollary because I play with my balls rather vigorously with my left hand while I jerk with the right, so I figured it evens out.
============================
This review brought to you by the AxolotlTranslator ™
--------
Also an interesting explanation to my freakishly disproportioned body! People have some good ideas, though for some reason they all have dirty minds ;(
I wish I had one of those...I'd just play with it non stop.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:43:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:37:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I honestly never considered the masturbation corollary because I play with my balls rather vigorously with my left hand while I jerk with the right, so I figured it evens out.
============================
This review brought to you by the AxolotlTranslator ™
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:43:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:42:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:40:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:39:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nice heat try
------
wtf are you talking about?
go back to writing underage erotica
===============
So much for you being the boy genius, You can't even read.
-------
who said I was a boy genius?
PS: I'm clearly reading these replies and responses. oh snap!
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:42:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I was thinking that I used my tendons and muscles more due to constant writing and pen/pencil use.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:42:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:40:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:39:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nice heat try
------
wtf are you talking about?
go back to writing underage erotica
===============
So much for you being the boy genius, You can't even read.
Submitted by lostnphound (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:41:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:40:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:39:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nice heat try
------
wtf are you talking about?
go back to writing underage erotica
---
pwned!
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:40:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:39:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nice heat try
------
wtf are you talking about?
go back to writing underage erotica
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:40:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:38:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www2.ubersite.com/m/110826
------
hahahaha
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:39:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nice heat try
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:38:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www2.ubersite.com/m/110826
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:38:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:36:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:33:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It's because you jack off so much, sherlock.
---------
Hmmm...it's an interesting theory, but somehow I don't think that's the case.
____________
Jerk it for six weeks with your left hand and see if you can still tell the difference between your forearms.
I bet you can't.
Submitted by sick.little.weasel (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:37:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
My guess is that you spend an unnatural amount of time jacking off. Since you are right-handed and the jack-off muscles are in your forearm, your right forearm is bigger due to a vigorous work-out routine. I would tell you to switch it up and use the left. Your jack-off muscles will even out and the curve in your dick will straighten out as well. However, DO NOT HAVE SEX. This will ruin the routine for your left and you will remain a freak forever. Plus, we dont want any little freaks running around by accident.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:37:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I honestly never considered the masturbation corollary, but like I said I don't believe that's the case. So far I see some very worthy explanations though, keep them coming.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:37:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
First of all, awesome gif.
Second, I also suffer from this affliction. I call it masturbators arm. I use my left hand as an orifice, but my right arm for daily tasks.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:37:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:36:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
what hand do you jack off with?
you will see a correlation.
trust me, my left forearm is Popeye-esque.
+2 for posting while everyone else is camped on Kaos-kings post.
Submitted by lostnphound (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:36:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I see what's happening here. You burp the worm often because, as your GIF suggests, pussy tends to run away from you.
This is my diagnosis.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:36:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:33:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It's because you jack off so much, sherlock.
---------
Hmmm...it's an interesting theory, but somehow I don't think that's the case.
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:34:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:33:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It's because you jack off so much, sherlock.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-02-18 16:33:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It's because you jack off so much, sherlock.