Surrendering to the Urge to Make a Fool of Myself (242 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.12 on 9 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by X54 (View user info) at 2008-03-01 22:02:37 EST
Surrendering to the urge to make a fool of myself on an internet forum, I post the following message: "Your opinion, if that's what you call it, contradicts itself. Which position are you taking: A or B? It's fucking ludicrous."
The person to whom I am responding is ignoring me because she doesn't think I share her opinion, whatever it is. But someone else reads my message. He mistakenly concludes I disagree with the original post. He writes in long paragraphs which are only tangentially related to either of the original poster's two mutually exclusive positions. He has an odd username, a reference to some obscure piece of literature.
"Look," I say, "I don't necessarily disagree with anything you've said, though it strikes me as nonsense. Can't you see it's impossible to claim both A and B simultaneously?"
He accuses me of putting words in his mouth. He hasn't claimed either A or B, he says. In fact, he disagrees with both.
I haven't claimed he's claimed A or B. Furthermore, he is now falling prey to the same logical fallacy which claimed the original poster. It is no more possible to disagree with both A and B than it is to agree with both, at least not without sacrificing the consistency of one's own argument. I ask him, "Do you understand the concept of mutual exclusivity or is your mother a drunken whore?"
To this he takes offense, from which I deduce that the concept of mutual exclusivity is foreign to him. He replies, in capital letters, that he understands perfectly well the concept of mutual exclusivity and that A and B are not, in fact, mutually exclusive.
How can one debate so slippery and ignorant a fish? It is impossible to do so in any meaningful sense. I tactfully point out what a fucking idiot he is and resolve never to post there again. I imagine the conversation I will have in the morning with the stray cat which I sometimes feed. For some reason, the cat takes this idiot's side despite my handout. What the fuck do you know about mutual exclusivity? Or A or B, for that matter? You're only a cat.
User Reviews
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-03-02 00:42:08 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
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Submitted by bjrog2 (user info) at 2008-03-02 00:26:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
A and B?
Do i look like i have a fucking pHD in Algebraic equations?
Use names plz, and maybe i could make something of your nonsensical BS
:)
Submitted by bigjeegro (user info) at 2008-03-01 23:31:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I'm not really sure, but did we just get a play-by-play of your forum posting life?
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-03-01 22:44:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
whoops. Silly me :)
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-03-01 22:44:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
or: How to have sex with a keyboard.
Submitted by Registered_S_O (user info) at 2008-03-01 22:41:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-03-01 22:37:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
did you just hook up the phone lines? welcome to 1997
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-01 22:29:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Alternative title: I like watching myself type OR if something had actually happened in the course of the post, you would have been amused.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-01 22:10:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Alternate title: "Any Given Day on Ubersite"