SPT: America's Map of the World (and Happy Easter, Bitches) (785 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 0.8 on 56 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by S.I. Co. Semen (View user info) at 2008-03-20 07:49:35 EDT
'Tis my last day of the work week and I'd like to wish everyone a blessed Good Friday although I'm not so sure what happened to make this Friday "good." If I remember the fairy tale correctly jeebus had a javelin chucked into his side by some spear chuckers with towels on their heads, while wearing a rose turban, and then he got put on a spit to roast in the sun. Why does this make any Friday good?
And Easter is when some cannibal tomb raiders got the munchies and decided to eat his body, bones included right? Seriously, with all sacrilege aside I don't know the complete story of Easter, not that I care to know but if someone would review about it I will read it.
With 100% sincerity may all of you have a safe holiday, safe travels, and fun times.
Enjoy this:
User Reviews
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:02:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you forgot to add: "thar be tariffs!" where the sea monsters used to be.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-03-24 17:41:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-03-21 22:46:00 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Tarka (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:16:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I always love these maps of how Americans see the world, because all the other countries can see how ignorant they are..again.
mmm, shiny!
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Y, yessir, we is so friggin igormunt. We make more money, have better houses, better teeth, and better cars. You suck.
America makes money employing intelligent foreigners to come in and make it for them. Have better houses? - well that's a laugh because they disintegrate to dust as soon as there's a breeze, I mean, who builds a wooden house in a tornado zone? More to the point, who would build houses at all, let alone a wooden one in a tornado zone and stupider still and probably the highest height of stupidity, who builds a whole fucking city on a fault line? Whiter teeth - They may be white but they are also 100% fake.
Cars - I think Clarkson says very well everything that's wrong with American cars.
Like the map btw.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-03-22 01:27:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I have decided that I will buy nothing from China anymore unless I cannot avoid doing so. This decision might require a significant portion of my disposable income.
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-03-21 19:15:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks man. Don't get drunk and run over too many babies this weekend.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-03-21 18:46:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Tarka (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:16:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I always love these maps of how Americans see the world, because all the other countries can see how ignorant they are..again.
mmm, shiny!
------------
Y, yessir, we is so friggin igormunt. We make more money, have better houses, better teeth, and better cars. You suck.
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-03-21 09:13:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:18:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Tarka - as in the Otter?
Interesting.
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tarka is an eskimo. his best friend always wanted to get into his parka.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-03-21 04:42:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Tarka (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:16:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I always love these maps of how Americans see the world, because all the other countries can see how ignorant they are..again.
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insignificant.
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-03-21 03:05:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
tru dat
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2008-03-20 21:58:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
They have the Nike and Microsoft factories reversed.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:24:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:46:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i already figured that out, caes. get with the times.
*******************************************
Yeah, I saw that afterwards.
It's possible they meant "mousse heads." Like, all Canadians gel their hair a lot?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:50:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:11:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bubba lying his face off, below.
==============
Why am I lying? I happen to like your posts, mostly.
Sometimes you're a dipshit, but who isn't?
Would you rather I -2 your over-developed ass?
:)
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:29:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BTW, Sico, if you don't have the attention span to peruse those other two links I pasted before,you can read the Cliff's Notes version of the Easter story here: http://www.ubersite.com/m/94793
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:06:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:04:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahaha Happy Easter!
Is Easter when that Jesus dude died? What the Hell has that gotta do with chocolate eggs?
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That's a loaded question. I know I've seen posts on here about the "history" before, which will got into more detail then I'm willing to right now. The rabbit and egg were pagan symbols for the Spring Fest, which Christians incorporated into their festivites so they could run the monopoly... or something like that.
Does anyone have a link to one of those posts handy for orphelia?
Happy Easter to you too Sico.
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:53:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Seen it already, yawn.
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:46:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i already figured that out, caes. get with the times.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:40:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:32:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
OOOOOHHHH I bet you mean MOOSE heads. That's the only thing I can think of that makes sense. It's not exactly Disney World up here.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:31:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
...Mouse heads?
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:11:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bubba lying his face off, below.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:27:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:05:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
4th time I've seen this on Uber
Good job beeing like Bubba http://www.ubersite.com/m/88964 too.
===================
Fuck off, Doodles. Sico is good people.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:21:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That map was old when I posted it back in 'ought six'.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/88964
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:15:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Thanks goodness I had a map.
Simple Simon - you and your silly pies.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:10:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Towel-headed spear chuckers and cannibal tomb raiders would make for a somewhat more colorful Easter story.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:07:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
However I still laughed. Good show and all that.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:05:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
4th time I've seen this on Uber
Good job beeing like Bubba http://www.ubersite.com/m/88964 too.
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:42:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,339270,00.html
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:40:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
correction: I might "agree" with...
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:39:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
sorry, but i would have given this a negative anyway. i might with most of those, but i've never seen canada as mouse heads.
maybe it was supposed to be moose heads, but i don't like making assumptions.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:38:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't remember why I was supposed to hate you in the first place. Now, I'm just having fun :) Cheers. Good use of the -2, btw.
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:36:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
hate me yet?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:57:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
To answer your question on the Easter story: http://www.gospel.com/blog/index.php/2008/03/17/passion-week/
And an inductive study to the question, "Can science disprove the resurrection?": http://tinyurl.com/2uyz6m
Submitted by lostnphound (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:42:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bliss.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:32:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
have a good holiday!
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:22:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You got it wrong - ISRAEL is the 51st state.
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:02:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I like how Africa is zebra-striped.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:01:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ALSO...IS ANYONE INTERESTED IN DOING A FANTASY BASEBALL SEASON. THIS INCLUDES PEOPLE FROM LAST YEAR AS WELL AS NOOBS.
Ahh, fuck it, I'll do a post tomorrow if I'm not to hungover.
Submitted by Fartman (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:55:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"Don't go here." ? OK, that's funny.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:49:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hoppy Easter!
HAR HAR
http://www.fireworks.com/images/postcards/easter-ecard.jpg
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:47:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You were supposed to find this one: http://stuff.ubersite.com/116948008140705915/1/Virgin%20Faggot%20With%20Cock%20Problems.jpg
but you failed :(
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:45:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
cock flaps, hmmmm. ummmm. weirdo.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:43:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
disagree?? shut up cock flaps, you don't disagree with anything except LARPers with virgin stamps on their foreheads.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:38:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I disagree.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:16:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I LOVE having a go at American world-ignorance. There's that great clip on YouTube too. You know the one.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:16:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, Hadley.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:15:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:47:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Rhymen, I appreciate your insight but I'm trying to figure out more how Friday became "good" when the only thing that I see of it was "bad."
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The good comes from the belief that through Jesus's death all of mankind was saved. Or more simply, acts bad, results good. There's a lot more to it but that's the gist.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:03:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's called 'Good Friday' because Jesus died on it, fools.
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:51:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Good Friday is also known as Holy Friday. It has to do with commemorating the crucifixion of Jesus on the Friday before Easter. That is about all I know. I'm not religious at all.
for more info, see: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Good_Friday
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:47:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Rhymen, I appreciate your insight but I'm trying to figure out more how Friday became "good" when the only thing that I see of it was "bad."
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:43:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Easter is the celebration of the reincarnation of Jesus, which is believed to have been on the 3rd day after his crucifixion.
The Easter Bunny laying eggs is a tradition that has been lost to the pages of history. It's far too ancient a tradition to find out the true origin. Though, some speculate that long ago, it was thought that hare's would lay eggs in the spring time as eggs were often found in what appeared to be a hare's burrow. However, the burrow was actually that of a Lapwing, which is a small bird that builds a nest on the ground very similar to that of a hare's burrow. Hare's and eggs are signs of fertility and new life so it can be speculated that the painting of eggs is to represent new life or to honor the foliage after a long, dead winter.
That is the explanation behind Easter and the Easter Bunny to the best of my knowledge.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:39:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I took a guess, based on the premise that:
1) You posted it
b) I liked it
So, I concluded that it wasn't your work.
I'm fucking brilliant.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:35:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow shlongy, you're fucking cutting edge. Did you confer with your sources to determine that or is it hot of the press?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:34:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This is pretty accurate and funny.
Too bad you didn't design it.
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:18:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Tarka - as in the Otter?
Interesting.
Submitted by Tarka (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:16:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I always love these maps of how Americans see the world, because all the other countries can see how ignorant they are..again.
mmm, shiny!
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:13:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hah. Americans are crazy.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:04:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahaha Happy Easter!
Is Easter when that Jesus dude died? What the Hell has that gotta do with chocolate eggs?