oh HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE (1068 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.19 on 45 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (View user info) at 2008-03-20 08:48:55 EDT
So if you want to articulate sacrifice, hang some 'hope' on a cross - feel empathy for a martyr, exact your fingertip clawing-needing neediness on something 'tangible'...this easter as you fill your child's/niece's/nephew's/little kid you know's shredded paper-cushioned easter basket, all sneak, sneak sneaky making bunny footprints with stencil and talcum powder, maybe try thinking about something you can get your pea-sized brains wrapped around. Some recalcitrant's delusional, capricious suicide, albeit well meaning, isn't nearly as bone jarringly humbling obvious as those that thought "dude, we're about to fix everything". And they had the benefit of baby jesus hindsight. But let's all believe in jesus instead, he was somehow much more righteous - sure he smashed stuff in the tabernacle but that was holy. angry - but holy. go jesus, you're like the only ballsy guy ever - please save our world and lift us all up on your heavenly host. sweet. you go guy. Even though we're just guessing you're the son of god, and LUCKILY FOR US we got born in a christian country, 'cause like god-forbid if we got born in Bombay or Mumbai or whatever they call it - or Islamabad or somewhere like berty. How much would that suck having to rely on missionaries and pure pot luck? phew.
Talk about a close call.
Dropkick Murphy's - No Man's Land.mp3 (6 MB) [audio/mpeg]
User Reviews
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-03-23 21:17:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
fuck you bitch i still haven't gotten my w-2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-03-23 20:54:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN BRIAN is gay
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-03-23 04:02:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shut the fuck up you worthless hack. I'm going to kill your gerbil farm.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-03-21 07:15:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ArnieGeddon (user info) at 2008-03-21 00:38:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
one post per day arsehat
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:(
Submitted by kuroneko_sama (user info) at 2008-03-21 06:16:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
if church & state are supposed to be seperate why do all government facilities close? (ignoring that easter is always on a sunday)
Submitted by ArnieGeddon (user info) at 2008-03-21 00:38:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
one post per day arsehat
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2008-03-21 00:08:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
we need to get back to the true meaning of easter...bunnies..and chocolate.and most importantly bunny-shaped chocolates.amen
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-03-20 19:55:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
jesus is a cunt.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-20 19:44:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:15:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry Oathmeal. Don't argue the Bible with a Sunday school teacher.
===
Wait, what?
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 18:51:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-03-20 17:25:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:33:53 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jews are God's chosen people, even in the Christian Bible.
Jews do not believe that Jesus was the Messiah. Indeed, they are proof that one can believe in God without believing that Jesus was God's son. So yes, they do contradict his passage.
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Jews WERE God's chosen people, until Jesus showed up, as I understand it.
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Were Jesus not, until his death and beyond, a Jew you might have a point. Christians are merely born-again Jews.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-03-20 17:25:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:33:53 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jews are God's chosen people, even in the Christian Bible.
Jews do not believe that Jesus was the Messiah. Indeed, they are proof that one can believe in God without believing that Jesus was God's son. So yes, they do contradict his passage.
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Jews WERE God's chosen people, until Jesus showed up, as I understand it.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 16:34:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Contradiction here. "Why callest thou me good? there is none good but one, that is, God"
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 16:33:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jews are God's chosen people, even in the Christian Bible.
Jews do not believe that Jesus was the Messiah. Indeed, they are proof that one can believe in God without believing that Jesus was God's son. So yes, they do contradict his passage.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-03-20 16:11:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:15:44 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
On this passage, one can assume that Christians, Jews, Muslims, and even pagans may enter heaven, provided they live a good and moral life and love their neighbors as themselves.
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How so? None of those passages you quote contradict John 14:6 (what Oathy quoted). Your logic is flawed. Literally speaking from the Judeo-Christian scriptures, to obey the greatest command (love God) requires that one must first believe in God, which requires believing that Jesus was God incarnate, and thus that there is no other way to God but through God himself (Jesus).
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2008-03-20 16:10:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
enter a comment here
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:42:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
sometimes i love it
other times...
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:31:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You are consistently one of the most interesting people on this site.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:29:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
More to the point the bible openly contradicts itself if you read it on a tradtionalist level
DR makes me laugh
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:15:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Or, to elaborate for Oathmeal who will doubtless try to get overly intellectual on me....
Let's look at the passage he quotes. "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." On a literal level, only the disciples who had daily dealings with Jesus would enter heaven. Now, no one believes that God intends heaven to be an empty, lonely place so let's look further.
In the Old Testament, God was angry and spent a good deal of time smiting those who did not follow the strict Hebrew law. Upon Jesus's arrival, he said that adhering to the letter of the law was not what mattered. Adhering to the spirit of that law was sufficient. Indeed, one need not even do that much.
I counter John 14:6 with Matthew 19:16-19.
"And, behold, one came and said unto him, Good Master, what good thing shall I do, that I may have eternal life? And he said unto him, Why callest thou me good? there is none good but one, that is, God: but if thou wilt enter into life, keep the commandments. He saith unto him, Which? Jesus said, Thou shalt do no murder, Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness, Honour thy father and thy mother: and, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself."
This is further backed up by Luke 10:25-28.
"And, behold a certain lawyer stood up, and tempted him, saying, Master, what shall I do to inherit eternal life? He said unto him, what is written in the law? how readest thou? And he, answering, said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself. And he said unto him, Thou hast answered right; this do, and thou shalt live."
And also by Matthew 22:35-40.
"Then one of them, which was a lawyer, asked him a question, tempting him, and saying, Master, which is the great commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul. and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets."
Further, these are not solely New Testament ideas. They in fact come from Deuteronomy and Leviticus.
Sorry Oathmeal. Don't argue the Bible with a Sunday school teacher.
On this passage, one can assume that Christians, Jews, Muslims, and even pagans may enter heaven, provided they live a good and moral life and love their neighbors as themselves.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:01:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:54:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:22:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sure I have, Slappy. And nowhere in the Bible does it say Christianity is the only way.
______________________________
Hadley you have here identified yourself as an true ignoramus.
John 14:6
Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."
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Jesus was a Jew. Christianity has nothing to do with it.
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:21:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:58:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ergh...I fell asleep on the couch..woke and have been learning about microdermabrasion (sp). Some skinny old slag from america is making me want to buy my own personal 'youthful essence' do-it-myself microdermabrasion (sp) kit, then hold her down with my foot pushing her ring-wraith face into the pavement and using the portable youthful essence microdermabrasion (sp) waterproof resurfacing tool on the wrinkled old mummified valley that is the beginning of her 'cleavage' as my 60 day free trial. If the youthful essence portable microdermabrasion (sp) waterproof resurfacing tool can fix that old creek-bed then I'm sold. And she will feel like she just got out of a salon.
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I'm going to be honest, I didn't read your post. This comment, however, deserves the +2
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:58:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I have to go home for Easter, but I'm not sure why as my family is not religious.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:39:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:39:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:19:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
IN AMERICA YOU ONLY GET ONE DAY OFF AT EASTER NOT TWO.
THAT'S UNFAIR.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:59:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:01:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow, OathMeal pwning Hadley? Must be a sign of the Apocalypse. :)
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<glances nervously at sky...>
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:58:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ergh...I fell asleep on the couch..woke and have been learning about microdermabrasion (sp). Some skinny old slag from america is making me want to buy my own personal 'youthful essence' do-it-myself microdermabrasion (sp) kit, then hold her down with my foot pushing her ring-wraith face into the pavement and using the portable youthful essence microdermabrasion (sp) waterproof resurfacing tool on the wrinkled old mummified valley that is the beginning of her 'cleavage' as my 60 day free trial. If the youthful essence portable microdermabrasion (sp) waterproof resurfacing tool can fix that old creek-bed then I'm sold. And she will feel like she just got out of a salon.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:05:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Marry me
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:05:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If you think this little bit of vitriol even comes close to my little boner BIG BONER post you are sadly dissolusioned or wrong or something.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:36:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Danger Ranger sucks the eggs out of dead rabbit ass.
Submitted by celtic1888 (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:15:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:06:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
John 3:16 is what you want to read because EmissionImpossible said so.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:03:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Easter confuses me. It's supposed to be a celebration of spring, and why do we have it in autumn on this side of the world just because it happens to be spring in the northern hemisphere? Senseless.
Oh, no, wait, sorry... it's not a spring celebration, it's about Jesus. The eggs symbolize new life.. the new life of Jesus! And the rabbits symbolise.. the rabbits of Jesus!
GLORY BE TO HIM ON HIGH
PRAISE HIS WORD
GIVE THANKS FOR HIS LOVE
REPENT YOUR SINS THAT YOU MAY BE FORGIVEN AND WELCOMED INTO HEAVEN
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:03:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:54:03 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:22:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sure I have, Slappy. And nowhere in the Bible does it say Christianity is the only way.
______________________________
Hadley you have here identified yourself as an true ignoramus.
John 14:6
Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."
/endscripture
The ONLY way to get into heaven, according to the Christian world view, is to accept Jesus Christ as your lord and savior.
Anyone thinking otherwise is severely misinformed.
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BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Well played sir.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:01:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow, OathMeal pwning Hadley? Must be a sign of the Apocalypse. :)
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:54:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:22:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sure I have, Slappy. And nowhere in the Bible does it say Christianity is the only way.
______________________________
Hadley you have here identified yourself as an true ignoramus.
John 14:6
Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."
/endscripture
The ONLY way to get into heaven, according to the Christian world view, is to accept Jesus Christ as your lord and savior.
Anyone thinking otherwise is severely misinformed.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:43:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
DROPKICK!!!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:25:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:03:42 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:50:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Christianity isn't the only way to get to heaven.
______________________
Yes it is.
Haven't you read the bible?
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He is waiting for the paperback to come out
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:22:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sure I have, Slappy. And nowhere in the Bible does it say Christianity is the only way. It's just the fastest.
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-20 10:03:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:50:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Christianity isn't the only way to get to heaven.
______________________
Yes it is.
Haven't you read the bible?
Submitted by Fartman (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:51:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
All Nature seems at work, slugs leave their lair, the bees are stirring, birds are on the wing. And Winter, slumbering in the open air, wears on his smiling face a dream of Spring! - Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:50:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Christianity isn't the only way to get to heaven.
It's kind of like being a pilot at the airport though. You still have to get your carry-on checked, you just get an express line so you don't have to wait.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:28:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-03-20 09:24:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
things that make you go hmmmmmmmmm...
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-20 08:52:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My sentiments, exactly...except without being so damned wordy. Here, see for yourself http://www.ubersite.com/m/115666