The BOSH Man! SHARES HIS POWER KNOWLEDGE RE: EASTER! (1025 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.52 on 70 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Dude, thats BOSH! (View user info) at 2008-03-20 12:49:16 EDT
So there I was reversing hard-boiled eggs into regular eggs so easter egg coloring narcs like earl scruggs would get eggs all over themselves when they tried to color it when all of a sudden I ran over the Cadbury Bunny with my moped.
I was deeply saddened. The Cadburry Bunny is so bosh. How many bunnies do you know that bawk like a chicken and lay eggs? The answer is one. One Bunny. The Cadburry Bunny. Don't kid yourself here, my moped can reach tremendous speeds. But don't worry, I was only going like 12 MPH.
I hopped off my moped and lit up a cigarette.
"Hey there Cadburry the narc, dead yet?"
"nah guy, just bruised my leg a little bit. BAWK BAWK"
"Calm down pal, we're all friends here."
"True.. hey listen how did you not see me? BAWK!! You've been approaching me for like the past 45 seconds.. only when you were 2 seconds away from impact did I realize I was about to be run over."
BAWK!
Notice how that is outside of the quotations? That's because I just 'BAWK'ed. Come to find out, The Cadburry Bunny is also a voodoo master and cursed me with a similar affliction to which he himself on his person hosts. BAWK!
"Enough of that talk. bawk bawk bawk bawk.. lets go get some guitars and put on a concert"
"bawk bawk bawk *cough cough* ..erm.. RIGHTEOUS!"
"totally!"
So Cadbury the Bosh and my newly cursed self went around town (bawk bawk bawk) laying eggs and hiding them in dangerous places like in jars full of needles, Harlem, up Thuderlips' ass, etc. At this point we decided to rock on our guitars real hard until the music particles we created drew together and formed a bosh treasure map which gave clues as to where the eggs were.
Scruggs stopped by and we immediately stopped jammin'. Cadburry the Bosh took one good look at me and through mind bullets I understood what was coming up next.
We both started 'bawk'ing at Scruggs. This went on for 45 minutes.
bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk etc.
Finally we picked up the treasure map and shit his pants. I just lit up a cigarette and nodded in agreement. Cadbury the Bosh joined Molly Hatchet and produced a number of smash hits.
Years later, I found out Scruggs got shot in the leg in Harlem, got AIDS from the needles, and got an atomic legdrop from Thunderlips. I clapped excitedly at the news.
And that, my friends, is how Easter started.
BAWK!
User Reviews
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-03-23 10:56:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2008-03-23 10:14:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hah
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2008-03-22 01:51:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-03-21 18:43:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Generally, I hate rambling shit like this. I also like Scruggs.
I am mystified as to why I find you so appealing.
I guess that's what makes you BOSH(!).
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-03-21 13:56:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i wouldnt go to one of his shows so i dont care about that. my biggest problem is the food at margaritaville isnt great.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-21 13:47:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
There are LOTS of people who hate Jimmy Buffett.
And from what I understand, the fucking ridiculous amount of money being charged for his shows these days is alienating some of the fans he used to have.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-03-21 13:36:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i was not aware that there was a single person on the planet who even mildly disliked jimmy. this blows my mind. you've never actually listened to any of his music, have you? jimmy buffett is the envy of every man who has ever lived. he is last generation's tucker max. today's insolence will not be overlooked at heaven's gates.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-21 12:01:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You like Jimmy? Really? Are you old? Or perhaps a frat boy and currently emebriated? I wasn't aware that anyone else actually liked him.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-03-21 04:33:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Earl Scruggs = Jimmy Buffet
---------
surely you've made some mistake here. i'll give you all one hour to correct this error.
do not disparage jimmy buffett like this ever again.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-21 04:07:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
GENIUS!
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-03-21 00:24:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
TOTALLY BOSH
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-03-20 23:41:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
bawk bawk bawk indeed
Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2008-03-20 23:29:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BAWK!
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-03-20 21:20:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 PERKman!
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2008-03-20 19:37:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I feel kinda bad for the people who don't get this.
It's really pretty funny.
Submitted by rodyarask (user info) at 2008-03-20 18:20:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I like the absurd genre
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-03-20 16:36:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
In the spirit of the bunnies.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:46:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i forgive you
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-03-20 15:45:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I thought this was kind of sub-par.
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:42:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
meh
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:38:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HBTS - that would be almost dead on if I weren't already living with him.
Submitted by Jack_of_Spades (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:37:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
meh
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:25:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2008-03-20 18:17:44 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
The ScotBOSH! special move is the SHOP RAG SNAP OF DOOM. He's been known to break skin with one snap of a shop towel.
================
Wrong. The ScotBOSH move is to drink a lot, pester a woman until she'll go home with you and then fall asleep in her bed.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:23:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
She boils people's intestines just like she boils cabbage (until it's bland and mushy).
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2008-03-20 14:17:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The ScotBOSH! special move is the SHOP RAG SNAP OF DOOM. He's been known to break skin with one snap of a shop towel.
Sexy IriBOsh Wife's move is the ANFRY REDHEAD GLARE. It boils her victim's intestines.
Someone call Rockstar Games, we have a winnar.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:58:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ForensiBOSH! = Genetically engineered mutant
I get that as my support character?
Dudes, that's schweeeeet!
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:58:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't understand why this is so funny or awesome, because it's shit. I guess it's just pure creativity.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:56:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
fuck i want to play that game right now
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:55:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BOSH!Kins and I had a talk, and we think each character should get their own support character.
BOSH! Man = BOSH! Donkey
Susie BOSH!Kins = the ScotBOSH!
Earl Scruggs = Jimmy Buffet
Earl Scruggs as Big Fat Gay Vampire Alter Ego = Uniter
ForensiBOSH! = Genetically engineered mutant
IcarBOSH! = Sexy Irish Wife
Wesely Willis = The Chicken Cow
There can also be all kinds of crazy characters summoned by the collecting of 100 cigarettes and the 'nod of agreement' special move. And we all get special cinematic BOSH!ening moves.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:46:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
big fat gay vampire could be scruggs' alter ego, or perhaps the end boss.. and Susie BOSHkins has a great idea.. you need to collect 100 cigarettes and do the 'nod in agreement' combo and then Thunderlips is summoned and dishes out vicious leg drops for a few minutes.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:45:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What about IcarBOSH's sexy wife?
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:44:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thunderlips can be a companion character like Clank. Or someone you can summon to administer an atomic legdrop.
I vote for a bonus character of the Iron Sheik to administer the CAMEL CLUTCH when needed.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:44:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
SWEET! And Bosh Donkey. Earl Scruggs could randomly switch to Big Fat Gay Vampire.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:41:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
unlockable characters hahahha
don't forget to include Thunderlips from Rocky 3!
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:39:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He can be added to the Super BOSH! Brothers fighting game I'm working on. So far we have the BOSH! Man, ForensiBOSH!, IcarBOSH!, Susie BOSH!Kins, the Kid who Knows Everything, the Cadburry Bunny, and Earl Scruggs (that faggot). Wesely Willis and Molly Hatchet will be unlockable characters.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:39:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I only use sadly as in "I feel dirty" when talking about Uber as a whole.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:38:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
are YOU the cadburry bunny??!?
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:37:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:35:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
that is indeed sad, perhaps you should read more!
or did you mean 'sadly' as in.. 'i feel dirty about reading that' ?
Submitted by Registered_S_O (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:34:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:34:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sadly, I think this is the first Bosh post I have ever read.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:32:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
and to the packie around the corner because i need a 6er
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:31:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I want to breed them and use them for transportation.. TO WAR!!!!!
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:29:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
when they kicked it I was all, "NO YOU WILL ANGER THE ROBOT GOD IT AND IT WILL SWEAR VENGEANCE ON US AAAAAALLLLLLlllll....!!!"
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:28:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Cadburry the voodoo master egg shitting narc does indeed have potential. Plus he hates Scruggs.. there is a warm place in my heart for beings such as that.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:25:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i saw that yesterday!
that dog robot is fuckin BOSH!!
i like how it slips on the ice and recovers.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:22:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope this Cadburry fellow is not just a one-shot character. I see BOSH potential.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:21:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ok!
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:16:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-20 11:51:57 CDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I saw those PRE-DYED easter eggs in the store the other day.
----------
You have GOT to be shitting me.
There are already X-Mas trees that come decorated, now this?!
Besides, the eggs 'n Spring fertility shit is pagan any ol' way.
Oh, and BOSH!
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:16:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
but... but Google our lord and master commands it thus, BOSH! Man!
here's a video of a fucking terrifying robot to make up for my trangressions: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1czBcnX1Ww
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:14:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:54:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:51:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I saw those PRE-DYED easter eggs in the store the other day.
That makes me really fucking sad.
If you can't take one hour a YEAR to dye eggs with your kids, then you shouldn't have any.
UNBOSH.
========
any eggs or any kids?
===
I meant kids, but really, both.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:12:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
YOU KNOW NOT WHAT YOU SAY
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:11:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oops, I'm a narc too
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:11:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
my friend, there is only one R in Cadbury.
but this post is still OUTTA THIS WORLD BOSH!!!!
FOUR EXCLAMATION MARKS BOSH!!!!
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:09:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
and if you're hanging with homies its
Bosh!, man.
caps screams for attention
Bosh!....demands it
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:06:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bosh! The Man, Bosh!
hahah i like it.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:05:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:05:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok
BOSH as an adjective is capitalized
but as in your name....it should prolly be just Bosh
as in
Hello ladies I'm Bosh, The Man Bosh
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:04:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:03:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Notice how that is outside of the quotations? That's because I just 'BAWK'ed. Come to find out, The Cadburry Bunny is also a voodoo master and cursed me with a similar affliction to which he himself on his person hosts. BAWK!
----------------------
You're not fooling anyone. You just don't attribute your quotes. Icarus told me. BAWK!
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:03:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I missed an exclamation point in the title, this too saddens me.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-20 13:02:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i agree
BOSH is so BOSH that you can totally disregard proper punctuation and capitalization so long as BOSH is written correctly
Bosh
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:58:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bosh should either be capitalized or put in all caps.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:57:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:56:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was so fucking Bosh. This was like ten time better than that Peanuts Easter special where Peppermint Patty tied Marci down and did various heinous things. I think they called it Lesbian Spank Inferno or something. I also liked how you digressed to actually BECOME the Cadburry Bunny through part of the story, was startled when he got hit with a moped, and happy when Earl Scruggs, that faggot, got AIDS.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:56:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:54:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:51:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I saw those PRE-DYED easter eggs in the store the other day.
That makes me really fucking sad.
If you can't take one hour a YEAR to dye eggs with your kids, then you shouldn't have any.
UNBOSH.
========
any eggs or any kids?
Anyway...Happy Easter Boshman.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:51:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I saw those PRE-DYED easter eggs in the store the other day.
That makes me really fucking sad.
If you can't take one hour a YEAR to dye eggs with your kids, then you shouldn't have any.
UNBOSH.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:51:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Dude, that's crap.
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-03-20 12:51:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So BOSH