Lion Queen (555 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.53 on 33 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by S.I. Co. Semen (View user info) at 2008-03-25 11:53:11 EDT
It was a beautiful mess, the black susans, tiger lillies, snapdragons, and Indian blankets lazily mingled together in a resplendent disaster. Flowers stole from each other, then gave right back, continuing a tyrant cycle producing a blanket of woven bliss. Faintly in the distance the sound of a humongous lion roared with a crackly and raspy fire, lighting up the dusk horizon, and silhouetting the droopy tree line. As they ran towards each other they met with a vociferous display of kissing, hugging, and they lied down right there to enjoy love making.
During love making they were passionately entwined, blocking out any sound--much like the field--touch, or motion, so long as it wasn't pertinent. It was a delicious symphony of hearty breaths, clumsy rubbing, and melodic intercourse. The lion roared and grew larger near where they lie. As the sky haphazardly darkened they turned to each other.
"I've planned such a beautiful trip" she said.
"Oh yeah? What're the details" he replied.
"You hear the loud roaring?"
He looked around before he gave a inquisitive reply of "yes?"
"We're going to float over this field. Hurry!"
In a blaze of nakedness they both started laughing while quickly dressing, giving one last kiss to each other before they ran to the lion. A giant, bulbous, hot air balloon awaited them, the grand fireball blazing a display of light almost around the whole perimeter. It was nearly full dark now and she wanted to get off the ground as her schedule had determined.
They lifted out of the beautiful field, he looked up and saw the giant print of a lion on the balloon. It made sense to him somehow, that the roar of gas being expelled in the form of a giant fireball matched the roar of the exuberant lion staring across the expanse. They skimmed the treetops sharing a glass of Shiraz before they both leaned over the basket enjoying the view below them.
A storm danced eerily into play a few miles away, the lightning shoving an enticing cascade of illumination in front of the balloon for their viewing pleasure. She grasped the red handle and thrust it down allowing the lion to roar mightily, however it failed in comparison to the mighty explosion the storm hacked up in thunderous form. She returned to the edge of the basket where his hand met hers.
He clamped down on her hand firmly, gripping it just hard enough to let her know he was serious, yet soft enough to display how tender he was, considerate of her abhorrent nature. She could, after all, completely fail to recognize his love, get caught up in her own love for herself, and often suitors would scurry away. With her hand still in his, he bent feebly down on the floor of the basket with one knee. Out of his breast pocket he produced a black, velvet box to offer to her.
Before he could ask the solemn question that has been scissoring at his emotions she pulled him up and planted a wet kiss on him.
"Wait..." she cooed into his nearest ear.
"I want--" she cut him off with a stern finger across the lips.
"Close your eyes and open the box."
She withdrew the ring and put it on the appropriate finger half expecting him to peek before she had time to react. The ring and rock were a gorgeous accoutrement to the already perfect evening, the storm clashing at their heels, the speckled field floor which had given birth to a swell of orgasmic pleasure, and the decadent view that was their balloon ride. He remained hushed with his eyes forced tightly shut in anticipation that when he opened them she would have the ring welded to her finger. Perhaps they'd enjoy another love making session.
His eyes were forced open when he felt his feet following a harsh shove to the chest, successfully toppling him over the edge of the basket. He forced his free hand out clawing for a rope, a sandbag, anything, anything at all that he could hold on to. There was nothing. He fell in silence, looking at an empty box where three months pay once rested, down into the spongy forest which would no doubt soak him up. She depressed the lever for the gas again, the lion roaring in a pugnacious chortle before being stifled by a larger roar.
The clouds chewed on the balloon and spat it out into the same forest which would undoubtedly drink her up like aloe on dry skin. There she lie, a few hundred yards away from the one who loved her most. The storm trickled on without so much thought, nearly quiet to another part of the world, where it would either die or gain company. It didn't care, that was for sure.
User Reviews
Submitted by OscarZAcosta (user info) at 2008-03-27 10:32:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
bingo ;)
Submitted by PhillipTheGreat (user info) at 2008-03-26 05:54:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
So this is a joke, right?
Right?
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-03-25 20:55:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That picture kicks ass.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2008-03-25 19:27:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
lied down?!?!?
sigh..... I..I...I...
*blinks*
*leaves*
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-03-25 19:10:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
That is one cool mother fucking gif, yo.
Submitted by bjrog2 (user info) at 2008-03-25 18:51:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 For your new job
-2 Coz its cold as fuck today, and i am off to work in a coolroom
+2 For tha bad mother-ucker of a GIF
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-03-25 16:20:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that is so fucking cool.
im going to go put together a post real quick but when im done i will actually read this.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-03-25 15:48:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hahaha dithered.
i have an opening (don't get excited now) next thursday at one
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2008-03-25 15:35:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-25 15:35:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Um...yes...Mr. HotWillie? I believe I'm next.
I have mommy issues. Can we discuss?
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-03-25 15:21:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
gotcha.
crying on the inside type.
that'll be two bits, shortstuff.
leave it on the table if it's more comfortable.
next!
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-25 15:15:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-03-25 15:09:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
do you get other people to help you write stuff?
maybe orphelia helped with this, yes?
wasn't she the one hinting around about you having an alter which got good reviews in that gruberthing?
perhaps she was bragging vicariously.
maybe the alter under whose name this was originally posted is some horrible frankenstein combining the worst parts of you both.
sicophelia! what a frightening monster that would be. orsicostein. sicphelenstein.
sicenphelia.
all i know is it would be a hideously ugly lactating asshole.
this was worth reading, no matter who wrote it, btw.
i've noticed you are always leaving lttle reviews to people, begging them to shoot you an e-mail, like you're lonely and want friends.
people like to be asked for advice and help, so maybe this is your way to gain acceptance.
a cry for help in a very real, psychological sense, by crying for help with writing your posts.
time's up.
i think we're going to need several sessions a week.
------------
Bwahahahahaaha, perhaps the most insightful comment ever to hit the uber pages. I request people to hit my email so I can show them unposted cock shots, you dummy. Perhaps if you were hip enough you could've seen the 38 part series.
Actually, I never ask for advice because I'm too stubborn but thanks for the 25¢ psychoanalysis, pal.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-03-25 15:09:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
do you get other people to help you write stuff?
maybe orphelia helped with this, yes?
wasn't she the one hinting around about you having an alter which got good reviews in that gruberthing?
perhaps she was bragging vicariously.
maybe the alter under whose name this was originally posted is some horrible frankenstein combining the worst parts of you both.
sicophelia! what a frightening monster that would be. orsicostein. sicphelenstein.
sicenphelia.
all i know is it would be a hideously ugly lactating asshole.
this was worth reading, no matter who wrote it, btw.
i've noticed you are always leaving lttle reviews to people, begging them to shoot you an e-mail, like you're lonely and want friends.
people like to be asked for advice and help, so maybe this is your way to gain acceptance.
a cry for help in a very real, psychological sense, by crying for help with writing your posts.
time's up.
i think we're going to need several sessions a week.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-03-25 15:01:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by celtic1888 (user info) at 2008-03-25 14:52:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Interesting. Comments below are unwarranted.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-25 13:22:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:18:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
your 'writing' is atrocious.
however, i have entered a new (and likely short lived) benevolent phase. because of this, i will offer praise on those things which individuals show promise at, and ignore those things at which they tend to fail.
you are very good at finding animated gifs and at breathing.
two very promising avenues, sir!
+2!!
haha
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-25 13:08:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Icarus, what I meant was see here: http://www.ubersite.com/u/eko and that I also don't care. I've been promoted, WOOT!
Submitted by InkyFingers (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:56:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Do you mind holding up the Earth while I take a quick pee break? SUCKA!
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:44:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Eh? Is that some euphemistic way of saying you stole it? Well, no harm done, really. I'm sure the original author is glad it's gone. He obviously doesn't live in an English-speaking country or go out in public much, though, so he may never know.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:37:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:28:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Posted under another user name....yadda yadda. Who cares? You like it or you don't. Everyone have a good day. No matter how hard you try you can't knock me down.
Auto +2 New Chemist Position Promotion for S.I. Co. Semen
------------------------------------------------------
Can you cook me up some meth? I'm gonna need it. http://www.ubersite.com/m/115761
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:36:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You really need to lose your password.
A bowl of Alpha Bits cereal makes more sense than this messfest does.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:28:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Posted under another user name....yadda yadda. Who cares? You like it or you don't. Everyone have a good day. No matter how hard you try you can't knock me down.
Auto +2 New Chemist Position Promotion for S.I. Co. Semen
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:26:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Some parts of this were really beautiful, others were not. The gif fucking rules though.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:25:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Are you kidding? I'm not trying to be mean. It's an honest question.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:22:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This post was a parody of itself.... and possibly the English language.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:21:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Almost unreadable. Sorry.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:19:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I wanted to give this better, it looked like it had potential, nice words, nice scenery but it didn't work...
-1 for the writing, 1 for the pic
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:18:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
your 'writing' is atrocious.
however, i have entered a new (and likely short lived) benevolent phase. because of this, i will offer praise on those things which individuals show promise at, and ignore those things at which they tend to fail.
you are very good at finding animated gifs and at breathing.
two very promising avenues, sir!
+2!!
Submitted by lostnphound (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:09:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fag!
Submitted by ubetidid (user info) at 2008-03-25 12:03:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i love a happy ending.
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2008-03-25 11:59:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Cool GIF. Stupid story.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-25 11:57:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
GAYSOME!
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-25 11:55:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
awesome!