Women can't drive for shit... (778 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.13 on 38 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Delete This Account (View user info) at 2008-03-26 16:15:21 EDT
Yeah, yeah...and the sky is blue, right?
Anyway, I have two serious pet peeves about driving that men and women do(actually, I probably have 50 peeves but I'll only mention the two I hate the worst.)
Red lights. Red lights mean stop. Green lights mean go. Didn't we learn this well before we got behind the wheel of a car? There was a game I remember playing as a very young child... red light, green light. It was stupid like most child games... But I do remember it. Anyway... What the fuck is wrong with people who get a green turn arrow and they move like fucking snails...as you're thinking "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM, ASSHOLE/BITCH?!?" you see the dumbass looking at you in their mirror. What the fuck does some asshole need to look at a side mirror as they turn on a green turn arrow for? Probably to see how pissed you are at them for driving like a moron, I assume.
Another one of my pet peeves are idiots that can't handle stop sign situations. As I pull up on a four way stop from well down the road I can see everything play out. There is shithead driver that is going to pull this shit again... they pull up to that stop sign about a half mile before I get there... and then wait for me to stop before they go. WHAT. THE. FLYING. FUCK. STOP, then go. Even if it was a 2 way stop sign, you'd have been able to pull out and get to speed without me T-boning your piece of shit car... Why do people do this? Because they are fuckups and there is no other excuse.
I will state something I like...but people often hate, but they have no idea why it is so good... Michigan's "annoying" swing-around lanes for left turns. I don't know what other regions have them, but I'm sure they do. You can't turn left at a major intersection...you have to turn right, then get in the left lane and turn around and go straight. The road is designed to curve people around like this... it can be hard at some times to get in that lane during rush hour times. It is designed because people are fucking morons and can't do left turns without killing a mother fucker.
And why the title when men and women do the two stupid things I mentioned? Because they're the ones behind the wheel 90% of the time when you're thinking "What the fuck is this dumbass doing?"
User Reviews
Submitted by sideshow (user info) at 2008-03-31 18:53:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
True enough...+2 for the pic!
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2008-03-28 15:35:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:40:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:27:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No.
________________________
Dumb bitch who can't drive right here.
___
Fuck you, I'm an excellent driver. You, on the other hand, are a shitty driver AND a moron.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-03-27 21:42:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate the people that don't understand the "first come, first served" principle at a 4 way stop sign.
And...jughandles are the best solution to a tee intersection without having to widen for a left turn lane, and to install and program a green arrow into the traffic light. They work best in high volume intersections, where the side road is of lower volume.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2008-03-27 15:41:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I hate fuckers who slow at a stop sign, slow right down to a crawl, then floor it. As you said, stop means stop. The other day I was at a 4-way. In the oncoming lane is a guy on a bike with long forks. We both stop. All is clear. We both start entering the intersection, and some guy in a piece of Asian plastic comes roaring down the cross street right throught the stop sign. The guy on the bike actually tweaked his wheel to one side to avoid getting clipped, then continued on his way.
That motherfucker had some fast reflexes.
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-03-27 15:32:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i see an arm in that car.
In our little city, yellow lights mean "six more can get through!"
Red lights mean "three more..."
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-27 13:48:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by gonefiguring (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:27:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Near where I live there's a big development going in that has roundabouts (I think they're called that in Oingland). They suck out loud. How can having to cross lanes of traffic twice in order to go straight be safer than just continuing through or stopping for a traffic light? Roundabouts are not 'quaint', they're stupid.
they're putting them in all over the fucking place here now too and they're fucking stoopid.
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-03-27 13:21:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This isn't really +2-worthy, I just feel like +2ing it for some reason.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 12:16:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM, ASSBITCH!!!
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-27 08:04:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
water = wet
fire = hot
thanks.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-03-27 07:24:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No shit
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-03-27 05:17:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How do you know when a woman's about to say something sensible?
She starts with 'a man once told me...'
Jonly oking.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-27 05:04:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
my driving is terrible.
Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2008-03-27 01:35:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, this may have been done before but it's the first time I've read it. That's one nasty looking wreck.
In traffic school the instructor asked us to raise our hands if we thought we were better than average drivers. Everyone did.
Submitted by Registered_S_O (user info) at 2008-03-26 23:58:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
stupihhhhhhhh
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-03-26 21:50:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Don't forget about asians!
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-03-26 20:33:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually both of the things you mentioned are supposedly 'safe driving' techniques. How do I know? In order to shave $50 off of a speeding ticket I opted to go to three hour driving sermon that sucked massively.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-03-26 20:21:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
100% of the times that I have been enraged whilst driving in Houston it has been a person of colour driving the car.
You know, niggers and spics and slant eyes.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-26 19:24:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-26 18:28:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And why the title when men and women do the two stupid things I mentioned? Because they're the ones behind the wheel 90% of the time when you're thinking "What the fuck is this dumbass doing?"
===
Wrong.
It's Asians.
Wrong again.
In SC, it's Ohioans.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-26 19:23:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Don't forget: "Yellow lights mean step on it and drive like hell because the light's about to turn red".
Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2008-03-26 19:03:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You cant post worth shit...
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-26 18:55:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-03-26 17:29:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
what a lame rant.
______________
Why?
Because it underscores the fact that women are less adept at coordinating their motor functions to accomplish common tasks like DRIVING?
Stabby's 90% statement above is pretty fucking accurate.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-03-26 18:47:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You could have done an 'original not been heard a million times before rant' and I might have liked it a bit better.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-03-26 18:35:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
arriba arriba
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-26 18:28:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And why the title when men and women do the two stupid things I mentioned? Because they're the ones behind the wheel 90% of the time when you're thinking "What the fuck is this dumbass doing?"
===
Wrong.
It's Asians.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-03-26 17:31:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
OMG I MAKE CONTRAVERSIAL YET OVERPLAYED OBSERVATIONS IN AN EFFORT TO GET RATINGS! I WOULD BE JUST LIKE HUGH LAURIE IF ONLY I WERE BRITISH OR ANYONE CARED WHAT I THOUGHT!
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-03-26 17:29:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
what a lame rant.
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-03-26 17:01:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Another one of my pet peeves are idiots that can't handle stop sign situations. As I pull up on a four way stop from well down the road I can see everything play out.
Amen brother. It's not that fucking hard you stop first, you go first. They inch too, inch a little stop, inch a little more and STOP. God, they're fucking annoying.
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:58:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Filename
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:40:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:27:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No.
________________________
Dumb bitch who can't drive right here.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:38:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll bet $1.98 that the driver of the car in the pic wasn't a woman.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:38:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The things that annoy the living fuck out of me whilst driving in this English dump are:
1. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, uses the whole of the slip road when coming off on a junction. Move out when there is room you fools.
2. People either never indicate or indicate TOO MUCH. If you are in the outside lane of a roundabout and are indicating right then you should be changing lanes, not just going round. They also indicate in lanes where there is no need to, such as in a lane where you can only turn right they will STILL indicate right. Gets on my tits.
Submitted by rodyarask (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:36:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I believe the "swing around" lanes are called Jug-handles.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:33:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
everyone thinks they're good driver, Schumi
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:33:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meh
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:31:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
RAWR!
now to read. +2 just in case this is good.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:27:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No.
Submitted by gonefiguring (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:27:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Near where I live there's a big development going in that has roundabouts (I think they're called that in Oingland). They suck out loud. How can having to cross lanes of traffic twice in order to go straight be safer than just continuing through or stopping for a traffic light? Roundabouts are not 'quaint', they're stupid.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-03-26 16:19:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm an awesome driver. Go eat a dick.