SPT: Talentless hack writer tires of trying to entertain you fucktards and camwhores instead (2281 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.1 on 153 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Ballare (View user info) at 2008-03-27 16:03:18 EDT
GO FUCK YOURSELF UBER
I'M HOT
User Reviews
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2008-06-04 18:14:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Can't believe I missed this.
Um, for the record, I liked you even when I thought you were a degenerate, gender-confused, seriously funny dude.
But it's nice that you have a pleasant face and breasticles.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-05-07 09:34:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This goes in the "Spank Bank."
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-26 05:39:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 17:45:15 GMT (#)
Ranking: 0
Surface piercings rock hard but are absolutely not worth it, imo. Not only the cost of them, but the care, and the risk of infection being so high, and the fact they're guaranteed to reject... I wanted to do my sternum, but they're such a huge hassle. They're fucking badass, though.
=============
I got my nape done for $60 which is pretty good going; it did reject after a year or so, but that was more due to having hair which kept getting caught in it rather than the quality of the piercing. A much better option now is to get a micro-dermal implant. I've had one in my wrist for two months and it's healing nicely.
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2008-04-26 05:15:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fantastic!
Submitted by Glenn. (user info) at 2008-04-09 12:40:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Nice classic 'fat chick' shots, fatty.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-04-09 03:31:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-04-04 10:38:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I feel BETTER.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-04-03 16:32:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I take it back, we are totally 100% factual internet BFFs.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-04-03 16:14:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
but obviously in this context I am using it mostly facetiously
-----
I am HURT.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-04-02 20:16:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you should always +2 yourself, kid.
it shows that you love you no matter whether anyone else does or not. i do it all the time, even though i am obviously very lovable and much adored. robert berg goes for the more modest +1.
modesty is greatly overrated.
rob, in my opinion, is underrated.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-04-02 20:15:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
pretty well, Pops, thanks
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-04-02 20:07:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
So, how'd the whole "show your globes on Uber" thing work out for you, Toots?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-02 19:58:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No, I knew you were referring to Haiku, I just thought it meant you were having some kind of cyber relationship, I hear they are all the rage.
Mexico whooop! There is a post in that when you get back.
Haha, I feel such a twat when I +2 myself.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-04-02 19:49:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
hah I just noticed I +2'd meself one review back
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-04-02 19:47:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I actually meant haiku and I, but we can be internet bffs too if you like. you mean to tell me that you've never seen the commercial with the old lady who's texting on her phone and her daughter asks who she's talking to and the old lady says UH, IDK MY BFF ROSE?? it's really quite funny anyway bff is best friends forever but obviously in this context I am using it mostly facetiously
breeeaaatheee
I am just very excited because I just bought tickets for me and the boy to go to Mexico :)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-02 19:00:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Internet bff's? I am OOOoold, I don't know your fancy talk. :(
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-04-02 18:22:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
we're internet bffs, thanks
r-right..?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-02 16:57:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
haikumikoo lurves ballare! aww sweet :)
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-04-02 16:25:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Now that no one's looking...
Shhh
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-01 13:19:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-03-28 16:23:18 CDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you dont look nearly as good in the third picture as you do in the first two.
that's because in the first two she was using standard 'myspace whore camera angle tricks' or 'doing a cookielass' as I like to call it.
The third was more conventional thus revealed the beast.
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2008-03-31 08:23:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Cute pooch
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-31 04:31:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-03-27 20:07:55 GMT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have seen the future. This will be #1 most heated by the time I leave work.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bwhahahahahahahahaha :) no.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-31 02:07:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
does... does it involve my dog?
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2008-03-31 01:10:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
heheh curiosity never ends well...
and if I explain myself properly in what I find attractive I'll probably end up wearing the silver bracelets and get called sex offender again...the "but she WANTED to know" explanation probably wouldnt hold up either.
Again....wait
what.
Although if curiosity is feminine bravery...you'd need to be brave Ballare for what I have in mind.
;)
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-03-30 04:25:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice Camwhores.
The 2nd pic actually made me laugh-out-loud.
You DO contribute more to this site than most: That's why no one knows who you are.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-03-29 20:13:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I strongly believe that dogs mirror their owner. When did you ever meet a friendly hound that did not have a friendly master? Or an ill-trained pooch that is not from a dysfunctional family?
Your dog looks like a fun and silly dog.
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2008-03-29 16:50:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Your hair is so cute in the first pic! It would look insane in braids.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2008-03-29 13:25:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2008-03-29 04:27:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I just implied skankish things about you!
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-03-28 22:34:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice tits, Rainbow Brite.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-28 19:30:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Curiosity is on of the forms of feminine bravery." -Victor Hugo
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 19:16:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
but now I'm curious!
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2008-03-28 18:40:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I find something totally hot in the gargoyle shot...
I don't know what it is...
Actually I do, but it'd either creep you out or get you to fall in love.
-Uncle B
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-03-28 17:23:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you dont look nearly as good in the third picture as you do in the first two.
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2008-03-28 17:23:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Friday night 2kakke, I guess...
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-03-28 16:01:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-03-28 14:17:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're very pretty.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-03-28 14:10:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-03-28 11:03:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you said you're hot.
that might be the case in Alberta, but here, i'm sorry but you'd be ordinary at best.
qc city is the thinniest city on the continent. ALL ZE GIRLZ ARE '0T!
--
haha I wasn't actually like "D00DS SEX ME I'M SO SLIM AND SEXY AND HAVE A MOUTH YOU WANT TO STICK MY DICK IN"
it was facetious at best. you should know there's no hot girls on the internet.
===
ok
i wasn't actually like "OMG Y00 R FAT!" either.
it was facetious at best. you should know there's a lot of angry male virgins on the internet.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 14:08:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
cowman! none of my real [read: actual effort put into them] posts ever garnered this many comments either, don't be jealous
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2008-03-28 13:48:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
over 100 reviews?
<jealous>I've never gotten over 100 reviews. I don't think i've ever gotten over 50 reviews.
Fuck you and your boobies. </jealous>
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 13:45:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Surface piercings rock hard but are absolutely not worth it, imo. Not only the cost of them, but the care, and the risk of infection being so high, and the fact they're guaranteed to reject... I wanted to do my sternum, but they're such a huge hassle. They're fucking badass, though.
Pfft, I'm too young to marry anyone. Though, he's terribly attractive in this "gosh I didn't know I was hot, I'm a geeky guitar player" way, we would make lovely babies together.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-03-28 13:25:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Whilst we're both aware that I would cuddle the fuck out of you, we also both know that you're going to marry that bloke you're with and have funny looking children.
I bet you won't even get divorced because you are the last genuine rebel of the 21st century.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-28 13:23:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i thought I saw some metal there. I was thinking about trying out a nape piercing but everyone in my life adamently opposes it and I worry it wouldn't heal well since I play soccer a few times a week.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 13:15:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
because I'm making silly faces? people seem to like that and I find it's the only time I actually manage to look decent in pictures. weird.
Berty, you know I'd do you in a heartbeat, but my boyfriend's got this "no cheating" thing - I don't know, I've never heard of it before. but maybe he could learn to share? and I have a thing for long hair.
(that rhymed hahah)
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2008-03-28 13:15:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Its my hot body, I do what I want.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-03-28 13:04:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No she doesn't Rhyme. There is something wrong with you.
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2008-03-28 13:01:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
you look a lot cuter in the first two pictures.
2cents
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:51:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm just joking Ballare. You should do whatever you want with whomever you want.
*makes note of the fact that Ballare does bearback*
Incidently I'd like to mention that I do not nor have I ever had AIDS.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:46:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
thanks for the sex talk, mom and dad. I'll be sure to be extra safe from now on!
haha I jest, I jest.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:44:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well yeah he's right. Sex with a rubber on is like running someone over in your car versus knifing them.
Stil, you know, AIDS.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:39:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
don't worry, nothing came of it
not even me
(ha ha ha)
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:37:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
it IS better but that's bullshit. you should have kicked him in the junk.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:32:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
the tattoo thing and the ass thing came after the sex but the condom thing was more like "here put this on" and then he said he did (and it was dark and I was drunk) and then when we were done he was like OH WHOOPS SORRY HEE HEE HEE IT'S BETTER THIS WAY
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:30:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
unless you were the one who said he was getting "THUGLYFE" across his lower stomach and refused to use a condom and tried to slap my ass but then totally missed, then was all Y U NO LIEK ME!!???
---------------
And then you screwed him anyway?
*shakes head*
It's a different world...
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:22:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
then you were in the minority, my friend
also:
HI-YAH!
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:21:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i always knew the co-champion of karate of friendship was a chick
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:19:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
well everyone already though I was a dude, I might as well go back to bitching about being a girl when they're like 'HEY I THOT U WAS A GUY'
sico, if you have any sort of tattoo, I haven't fucked you. unless you were the one who said he was getting "THUGLYFE" across his lower stomach and refused to use a condom and tried to slap my ass but then totally missed, then was all Y U NO LIEK ME!!???
but that probably wasn't you.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:16:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
sicosemen likes chicks who are cute but also have a penis, pass it on.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:15:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
thanks for taking the initiative and passing it along.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:15:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If I haven't already fucked you, I would. What's up with all these girls camwhoring that look like some broad I already holed out.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:07:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ballare has a penis pass it on
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:05:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
whoooops lololol
AND HAVE A MOUTH YOU WANT TO STICK YOUR*** DICK IN
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 12:04:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-28 08:58:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
never heated? if anyone else is around to entertain me maybe I'll just camp here for the day.
I like the second picture, you got a perty mouth. but it almost looks like you have a labret piercing in that one except i see no evidence of such self mutilation in any of the other pics.
--
yeah I'm a metal face
my ball on my labret's small, so it's hard to see when I make stupid faces for the camera. I've also got my septum pierced but lord knows why, I never flip it down unless I'm really drunk and then I always feel like picking my nose. I had my eyebrow pierced but it fell out in France; I put it back in for special occasions.
and I have a tattoo. of a windmill. on my foot.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-03-28 11:03:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you said you're hot.
that might be the case in Alberta, but here, i'm sorry but you'd be ordinary at best.
qc city is the thinniest city on the continent. ALL ZE GIRLZ ARE '0T!
--
haha I wasn't actually like "D00DS SEX ME I'M SO SLIM AND SEXY AND HAVE A MOUTH YOU WANT TO STICK MY DICK IN"
it was facetious at best. you should know there's no hot girls on the internet.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-03-28 11:33:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-03-28 11:03:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 03:07:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Alberta hot? What does that even mean?
===
you said you're hot.
that might be the case in Alberta, but here, i'm sorry but you'd be ordinary at best.
qc city is the thinniest city on the continent. ALL ZE GIRLZ ARE '0T!
-----------------------------
Ordinary is much much better than corpulent she-beast, Ballare.
Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2008-03-28 11:30:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I agree with everyone who said you have beautiful eyes. And I like the first pic best. All those bongs in the background.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-03-28 11:03:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 03:07:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Alberta hot? What does that even mean?
===
you said you're hot.
that might be the case in Alberta, but here, i'm sorry but you'd be ordinary at best.
qc city is the thinniest city on the continent. ALL ZE GIRLZ ARE '0T!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-28 10:24:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You did it!
CONGRATULATIONS.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-28 10:07:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jsesu Christ... this FJ Bell is moving up the charts of Most Annoying Uberer in record fashion.
Shut the fuck up for just 5 minutes.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-03-28 09:39:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/u/F.J.Bell/l/uberbeauties
You made it! How do you feel?
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-28 08:58:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
never heated? if anyone else is around to entertain me maybe I'll just camp here for the day.
I like the second picture, you got a perty mouth. but it almost looks like you have a labret piercing in that one except i see no evidence of such self mutilation in any of the other pics.
on a completely unrelated note.... um, well, it's earlier in the morning than i ever like to get up and I have nothing to add but let me assure you that whatever it was I might have been thinking of would have made for a totally awsome "on a completely unrelated note" comment.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-03-28 08:45:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The first pic with all the bongs in the background is great.
I have to go to this one particular head shop because they're the only ones who carry my favorite brand of incense.
I've never noticed any girls who look like you though. Here they're all tall, lanky guys who look like Shaggy from Scooby Doo.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-03-28 08:20:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Dear _toe, Robert Smith here thinks 'secret' means virginity. *I* of course, as you now well know, am like a fucking well hidden wall-safe, I have your photo wrapped in my trustworthy blanket of trustworthiness, I'm the fucking modern day knights templar and your faith was well placed, as opposed to valerie's hoodoo chicken sacrifice she tick-tocked over her 'intact' hymen.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-28 08:07:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So like any other night, then?
And Toe doesn't strike me as the kind of girl who would allow herself to be pimped out by an aging robot with programming limited to video games and sports humor.
OR, this might work- Hey Toe- can I get a glimpse of your camwhore? Brian..er..'Eddie' has my e-mail address, and god knows enough people around here can vouch for my ability to keep a secret. Well aside from Brian, obviously.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2008-03-28 07:55:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Can i get a pack of Northern Pride feminised, 3 packs of OCB Blues (I roll them fat, so they burn slow), and a couple of Quintessential hemp roach books please?
Ta babe.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-03-28 07:45:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll tell you what morticia. How about you defiantly stand up to the doorman at the pub next time you go which should be sometime in the next five minutes, and insist that you're not a little 5 foot nothing kid, make some tired old inside don't-tell-the-elf joke when he says "if you don't fuck off I'll throw you into a cab", and then I'll email you _toe's photo, right after I ring hadley and dust of his lapels and say "listen hadley old chap, I hope I wasn't out of line with all those bengirls remarks", push his fat coke-bottle glasses back on the bridge of his stupid cinci nose and eat shit and die. Then I'll email you that photo, even though I've administrator-blocked your fucking address.
how's that sound?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-28 07:31:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-03-28 06:40:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have _toe's camwhore, lily munster.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114716#2641204
I'll post if for say, a thousand bucks. Canadian, not your subprime greenback.
===
Well, Eddie, how about you just e-mail it to me for free, and I won't tell anyone about how you dressed up in a short purple suit and begged me to let you call me mommy?
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-03-28 06:52:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
and Ballare, hair comes in one colour (trust me I know). Ask your dog.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-03-28 06:40:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:58:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well FINALLY.
Now someone go tell TOE it's her turn.
For the record, I'd make out with you.
----------------
I have _toe's camwhore, lily munster.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114716#2641204
I'll post if for say, a thousand bucks. Canadian, not your subprime greenback.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-03-28 05:06:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gorgeous.
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2008-03-28 04:49:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ugh I keep trying to think of something clever to reference to your hair but when I look at it I keep getting distracted with a mental image of a zebra fighting a giant fabric swath thingy from Home Depot.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-28 04:16:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:06:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I've contributed more to Uber than you ever have, Caul, give me a break
------------------------------------------
Urgh. I can't believe you said that.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 03:07:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Alberta hot? What does that even mean? Does it mean I stand out with a lack of snaggletooth face flid-arm-edness? Or should I be wearing a cowboy hat?
And yes, you'd think so, but the job actually sucks ass. The pay sucks ass. The abusive clientele who think I'm a filthy dirty no-good hippie/pothead/pinko commie, "but I'm just here for the hemp clothes", suck ass. The actual pot smokers rock hard, though.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-03-28 03:03:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...definitely Alberta hot.
A bong shop? With ACTUAL bongs?
Dude, you win for most interesting jobs goin' around these parts.
Kick
ass.
Keep writin' too, you are rather excellent at it.
GO BEARS.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-03-28 02:50:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Your bra is showing.
WHORE.
of the cam variety, of course.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-28 02:46:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
GUISE I NEVAR BEEN ON MOARST HEETED B4 OMG
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2008-03-28 02:17:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-27 13:31:57 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you're cute and I do love boobies.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-03-28 00:37:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
dogs = -2
head shops = + a lot
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-03-27 23:58:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:31:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
his comment seemed to imply my post was useless ie. THANKS IN TRYING TO TAKE BACK UBER, BITCH. but, not counting my past three posts, everything else I've ever written has been pretty good, content-wise, as opposed to Caul, who... well... basically fucks around.
but, yeah, pretty much what haiku said.
===
i suppose boring fiction is your idea of contribution?
well, i think you didn't get the memo: most people don't read posts.
AND I'M A MAN OF THE PEOPLE!
seriously, i wrote a number of "proper" posts lengthwise until i realized i myself didn't give a shit about posts that took me more than a minute to read so why do it?
the cob77 alone has contributed more than you and i ever will. :-|
and you should have specified: "I'M <ALBERTA> HOT!"
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-03-27 23:40:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:06:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I've contributed more to Uber than you ever have, Caul, give me a break
unless you weren't being sarcastic, in which case, whatever
===
i wasn't being anything.
uber is boring and lethargic.
more camwhores and drama usually help.
nothing to do with your so-called contribution. i'm not even sure i recall seeing you so i dunno what you're talking about.
Submitted by ChristPuncher (user info) at 2008-03-27 23:09:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
OPPS BEEBED
Submitted by ChristPuncher (user info) at 2008-03-27 23:09:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/115802
YOU HAVE BEEN BEBED
Submitted by ChristPuncher (user info) at 2008-03-27 22:40:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I dont like the cut of yer jib
Prepare to get Beebed
GO BEARS WOO!!!
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-03-27 22:38:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
For some reason you remind me of inion_de_trua... something to do with the face, not the tits.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-03-27 21:33:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice boobs, eh.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 20:43:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
thanks iddqd, I didn't know that.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-03-27 19:59:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
welcome to the most popular post youll ever do.
its all downhill from here.
congrats on the vag.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2008-03-27 19:51:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You're a chick? Man, I really haven't been paying attention.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 19:19:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fungah, I can answer yes to at least three of your questions. But which ones will be left up to you.
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-03-27 19:16:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:58:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well FINALLY.
Now someone go tell TOE it's her turn.
For the record, I'd make out with you.
--------
Semper Fi lishy. Semper fi.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-27 19:15:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're a fag, too.
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-03-27 19:15:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
JESUS! BREASTS!? I'VE HEARD OF THOSE!
Is it true that if you pour baking soda on them a leprechaun comes out?
Do you actually have to slay a dragon in a previous life to receive them in this one?
Is it true one tells you to do evil things in a Spanish accent, while the other tells you to do good deeds in a German accent, but sometimes they switch so you don't know which is which?
Who would win a fight: your breasts, or a Doberman pinscher?
Can your chest be used as a floatation device?
If it was socially acceptable, would you wear a huge, spire-like cone brassiere tipped with poison?
Have you ever eaten breakfast off of your chest?
What is having boobs like?
Is it true that people ACTUALLY have boobs? Or are they just bags made of sand girls wear under their shirts?
I'm so full of questions.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 19:14:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
oooohh it is white trash hair
here it is classy but edgy ha ha ha ha
and no Shlongy, I have proof to the contrary, but thanks for your concern. we can still do it.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-27 19:06:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.gotopage.us/updos/images/trendy-medium-hair-updos-image312.jpg
It is a bit too close to this for comfort. Over here, it is a bit of a chav do. :(
But you are young and pretty, so it is no worry! :)
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-27 19:06:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That's because your boyfriend's a fag.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 19:01:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
GUYS what's wrong with my hair? My boyfriend says it's emo :(:(:(
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-27 18:52:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, the hair is... You will grow out of such styles. :)
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2008-03-27 18:45:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're lucky I like chicks with glasses...and boobies or else I'd think up a thigh slappingly funny comment about your hair!
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-03-27 18:14:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You dont lie!! giggity giggity YAH!
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-03-27 18:12:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BONG!
Submitted by AllyJeans (user info) at 2008-03-27 18:03:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I get this desire, especially when I'm drunk, to poke the exposed sternums of friends and strangers, the caveat begin that I can't touch either breast. It would be like the game operation, and though I've never done it, I know I would make the buzz noise if I missed.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:59:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What time are we having sex this evening?
I mean, together.
I have to play poker at 7.
Love, Shlongy.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:58:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well FINALLY.
Now someone go tell TOE it's her turn.
For the record, I'd make out with you.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:54:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I was kinda right about the nose :)
Am I the only woman on Uber not to wear those glasses?
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:52:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
enjoy your boozing scourge!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:51:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:51:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
it IS totally awesome!
well, anyway, your talking with me here has earned you a place on the list of ubersite people i will certainly try not to say anything particularly nasty to unless they do something utterly asinine or i'm in a bad mood or just forgetful that day and slip up (that's almost like liking someone in my world) but now i really need to go get some booze in me.
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:44:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like your eyes.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:44:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm the answer to life, the universe, and everything?
TOTALLY AWESOME!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:42:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
really?
that's totally awesome and i will!
in other news, i've been saying 'totally' a lot in an attempt to annoy other people and now it annoys me but i can't quit doing it. i also say 'awesome' a lot but that doesn't bother me at all because the word 'awesome' is awesome.
you're a 42.
totally.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:38:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
naaah scourge
naaaaaaah
just do what feels good
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:33:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
oh, and the second pic of you is the best of the three... if we're supposed to vote or something.
or is this like a HotOrNot thing and i need to assign a number? because i'm totally not going to do that.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:31:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
his comment seemed to imply my post was useless ie. THANKS IN TRYING TO TAKE BACK UBER, BITCH. but, not counting my past three posts, everything else I've ever written has been pretty good, content-wise, as opposed to Caul, who... well... basically fucks around.
but, yeah, pretty much what haiku said.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:30:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
good enough answer for me.
now i need to go get some booze in me.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:21:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 14:14:09 PDT (#)
Ranking: 0
haiku, how could you do that to me?
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeps
-----
With anger, duh.
Scourge - I think she means because she writes good short stories and Caul pretty much just fucks around, but I enjoy Caul's antics so I'll take the same stance you are, or, "?"
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:14:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:06:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I've contributed more to Uber than you ever have, Caul, give me a break
unless you weren't being sarcastic, in which case, whatever
---
not that i'm necessarily disputing OR agreeing with this assertion, but please do enlighten me as to how one determines how much one has 'contributed' to uber.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:14:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
haiku, how could you do that to me?
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeps
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:03:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
What's a camwhore post without an angry -2?
*ANGER*
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-03-27 17:02:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2008-03-27 13:35:17 PDT (#)
Ranking: -2
meh
great eyes
cute face
glasses
nice tits
and a little chubby
my god she is every woman who works in a smoke shope
------
Huh, you're right.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:44:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Does what it says on the tin.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:37:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:24:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thorns my dear I ALWAYS have interesting stories to tell. Yesterday, I came into to work to visit my boss, and while we were chatting, two older customers came in. One went to look at scales, and who I assumed was his wife came over to look at the pipes and started mumbling to herself in this old-lady murmur. I kind of smiled awkwardly at her, and her husband said something to her that she obviously missed, because she looked up at him and said, "Sorry, dear?"
He said something about the scales, and she answered him, turned to me, and said in a perfectly sane voice, "I'm going to kill him."
I smiled again and nodded, and she kept going, "I even know where I'm going to hide the body. I have the perfect place. I'm going to kill him..."
And then he said something else, and she replied, loudly, "Yes, dear, of course, dear."
And then I left because I had to go to the dentist.
--
HAHA!
A couple of years back in San Francisco some tall (Herman Munster tall) bum in a stained trenchcoat mumbled obscenities to me, so I told him to go fuck himself. That is simply NOT done in SF, where we all must bend over backwards to help the useless. I go into a store and this bum follows me in, walks up to a display case holding different cuts of meat, and then points at me and shouts, "BUTCHER, GIVE ME A KNIFE! I WANT TO KILL HIM!"
The butcher was a tiny Chinese guy, about 4ft nothin, but he chased the guy right out the door.
+2 for your doggie. The tiny body, the bright eyes, the eager look, it's like seeing Shlongy with hair.
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:35:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
meh
great eyes
cute face
glasses
nice tits
and a little chubby
my god she is every woman who works in a smoke shope
on the real though
beautiful eyes
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:34:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
scruggs has decor similar to the likes of the first picture of you.. similar but different, because his are actually dildos
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:32:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
now go write something.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:31:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you're cute and I do love boobies.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:31:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:07:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have seen the future. This will be #1 most heated by the time I leave work.
=================
straight truth.
prediction, at least 20 dudes will literally pitch a tent and camp on this post.
oh and ballare you are nice lookin!
Submitted by dithered (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:25:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Your eyes are remarkably un-bloodshot for working at a head shop.
I'd hit you.
I mean...I'd hit it. I mean...fuck nevermind.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:24:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thorns my dear I ALWAYS have interesting stories to tell. Yesterday, I came into to work to visit my boss, and while we were chatting, two older customers came in. One went to look at scales, and who I assumed was his wife came over to look at the pipes and started mumbling to herself in this old-lady murmur. I kind of smiled awkwardly at her, and her husband said something to her that she obviously missed, because she looked up at him and said, "Sorry, dear?"
He said something about the scales, and she answered him, turned to me, and said in a perfectly sane voice, "I'm going to kill him."
I smiled again and nodded, and she kept going, "I even know where I'm going to hide the body. I have the perfect place. I'm going to kill him..."
And then he said something else, and she replied, loudly, "Yes, dear, of course, dear."
And then I left because I had to go to the dentist.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:18:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:16:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:13:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
! I never knew you were a girl. I like the dyke-hair look.
--
SO DOES MY GIRLFRIEND ;) ;) ;) LOL ;)
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:17:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Because I *know* you've got a little story in there just WAITING to come out.
Like Caul.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:16:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:13:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
! I never knew you were a girl. I like the dyke-hair look.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:16:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Silly me, I forgot the rating.
+2 for being interesting
-1 for not entertaining me with an interesting story :)
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:14:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*grabs bottle opener and beer from fridge*
*chugs bottle of Woodchuck*
*waits*
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:14:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey! It's that Candadian writer I like! Awesome!
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:13:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
! I never knew you were a girl. I like the dyed-hair look.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:08:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yay doggy!
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:07:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have seen the future. This will be #1 most heated by the time I leave work.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:07:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think my dog's pretty hot, too.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:06:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I've contributed more to Uber than you ever have, Caul, give me a break
unless you weren't being sarcastic, in which case, whatever
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:05:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, sorry again - I was lookin' at you.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:05:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh sorry - I was lookin' at the dog.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:05:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hopefully posts like these will restart uber
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:04:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You are hot.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-03-27 16:04:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
POWER