I worked hard on this story. (2513 hits)
Category: Quotes & Stories -> PoetryRating: 0.07 on 105 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by netimportant (View user info) at 2008-04-14 20:49:50 EDT
User Reviews
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-06-20 11:46:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i'm gonna go out back and hump the fridge
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-06-20 09:34:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
its in the fridge, right next to my dick cream
Submitted by hollygolitely (user info) at 2008-05-16 04:13:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm pretty sure that I've been kissing your ass for enough years that this qualifies as something.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-05-15 17:16:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
lol
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-05-07 22:46:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If I have a dick, this just might be the greatest day of my life.
I don't know why you haven't become my friend, holly, we're both awesome and sexy.
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2008-05-01 04:28:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think you have a dick.
Submitted by hollygolitely (user info) at 2008-05-01 03:00:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have no idea why we haven't become friends by now. I'd like to be :/
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-04-30 06:34:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bitches never forget.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-04-25 15:27:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You love me now, but what about this...?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/38243
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-04-18 05:46:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2008-04-17 16:42:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-04-17 02:33:44 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Y HALO THAR, HELMUT CAT.
----------
heh heh heh heh heh
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-16 22:00:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ahahahahahah
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-04-16 21:33:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Y HALO THAR, HELMUT CAT.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-16 21:05:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
wow.
quite the rebuttal.
you must be happy, you've lost your evil.
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-04-16 19:11:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I really wanted to write something for Uberotica, or whatever it's called, but I just moved and got a new job and I've been busy. I hope I can write it at some point anyway.
Apollo, someone recently told me that he likes my jawline, eyes, tiny waist and cute butt, and since he's about three-hundred times funnier and more attractive than you, how can your opinion possibly matter? It can't. I just wanted to remind you.
Damn, that was weak. I guess I'm losing my touch. And my mind. Good thing I still have my virginity!
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2008-04-16 14:22:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not a big fan of the glasses. Try wearing them upside-down in your next post. I think it's just the part that goes over the ears hanging so low on the lenses that bothers me.
Submitted by sir_cowman (user info) at 2008-04-16 14:06:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I scrolled through the comments, and when i saw that i hadn't -2ed this yet, i thought "awesome."
-2 die
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-04-16 13:52:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You seem a mite too eager to find out though.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-16 13:51:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Why do you think I originally replied to this post?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-04-16 13:50:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
getting pubic lice in your moustache is clearly something to tick off your list O.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-16 13:26:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I wonder if 'liced up' prostitutes cost more than 'regular' prostitutes?
Because you're paying for a specialty service, I mean. Custom. You're not just buying off the rack, so you'd probably have to pay more.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-16 13:24:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That's pretty awesome. By which I mean it's great that I don't have first-hand experience with any part of that story whatsoever.
These two guys clearly need to meet and party together.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-04-16 13:20:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Here's something even more pathetic than that, Ogasmatron. One time we got a dude who came into see his doctor with lice in his moustache. Yes, it was lice from someone's pubic region.
The pathetic part wasn't the patient coming in the ONE time with pubic/moustache lice, it was the patient having to come in MULTIPLE times with the SAME problem, which he had contracted from the SAME individual.
It seemed the patient enjoyed prostitutes and their wares. The nastier the better.
Here's the really enjoyable part of the story. When the patient's WIFE found out that was where the lice that afflicted HER and THE CHILDREN came from, she divorced him. He then had the gall to bitch to the doctor months later about how his wife divorced him for it.
Sometimes I loved my job.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-16 13:03:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Some time ago a co-worker of mine told me a story about someone he used to work with. The guy was checking himself out in front of a mirror just before meeting with a client, and saw something small come leaping out from his mustache and hit the mirror.
He wasn't sure what it was at first, but apparently put 2 + 2 together, searched around his facial hair a little more and realized that Yep, It's Crabs.
Thankfully the meeting was in an office building that had a mini mart on the ground floor, so he absented himself, gave a quick shave and hoped for the best.
How'd you like to meet someone with crabs in his mustache?
"Oh hey there, Mitch, how's it going tod---" *PING!* "---WHAT THE SHIT WAS THAT?"
"Just crabs m'boy. I was eating at a rather suspicious Y last night, if you know what I mean, and I fear I paid the price. Now skate it off and let's go get some burgers at Fuddruckers."
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-04-16 12:35:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-16 14:57:35 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-04-15 22:30:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:43:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That IS the corner where she works!
<runs for his dear life>
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:33:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So is this near the corner where you work?
That's right, you two better visit me. Jeanneee three.
---
What'll $100 get me, hmm?
---
crabs?
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-04-16 12:29:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"Watcha' doin'?"
"Getting ready to -2 this crap."
"Good."
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-16 09:57:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-04-15 22:30:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:43:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That IS the corner where she works!
<runs for his dear life>
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:33:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So is this near the corner where you work?
That's right, you two better visit me. Jeanneee three.
---
What'll $100 get me, hmm?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-16 03:41:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
What happened to your uberotica entry? I think many men were disapponted.
Nice jacket and hair cut, btw.
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-04-16 03:17:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Man, I am so exhausted that I'm past the point of being able to sleep.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2008-04-16 02:52:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bono?
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2008-04-16 01:23:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i think you're pretty... but i can't be sure without seeing your eyes
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-04-16 00:45:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-15 20:01:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-04-15 11:43:11 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That IS the corner where she works!
<runs for his dear life>
"<runs for his dear life>"
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.
What's happened to the fat greek?
OMG Method is a furry.
deer
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-04-16 00:44:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this story worked me pretty hard. whatever the fuck that means.
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-04-15 22:30:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I love gay rays!
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-04-15 22:30:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:43:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That IS the corner where she works!
<runs for his dear life>
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:33:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So is this near the corner where you work?
That's right, you two better visit me. Jeanneee three.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-15 20:01:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-04-15 11:43:11 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That IS the corner where she works!
<runs for his dear life>
"<runs for his dear life>"
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.
What's happened to the fat greek?
OMG Method is a furry.
Being open and accepting wasn't part of his plan.....
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-04-15 17:53:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hmmm...
Like the hair, loose the sunglasses.
The coat is questionable.
You really are a fucking strange one, Lisa...
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-04-15 13:59:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
that your jacket's bottom button is not done up bothers me
how inane
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2008-04-15 13:29:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nice
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2008-04-15 13:17:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
grow the hair. lose the glasses.
i'd stick it in ya.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:58:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yay!
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:53:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Truth below
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:52:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's Method, dear. He's radiating gay like he's been stuck in a gay microwave suffering a bombardment of gay rays for a half an hour.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:50:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Is it just me or is Ubersite extra gay today?
Maybe it is just me. I'm extra gay every day.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:47:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Let's not pretend that you know where female prostitutes hang out, meatgazer.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:43:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That IS the corner where she works!
<runs for his dear life>
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:33:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So is this near the corner where you work?
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:22:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
adorable
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:20:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AhAHaHaAH, oh. Today is the last day of tax season.
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:20:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/99664 compare.
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-04-15 12:09:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha, this just reminded me of something.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-15 11:44:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Far too many clothes. Do you have any idea how furiously I had to wank to this before I got anywhere?
My arm is killing me.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-04-15 11:34:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
no
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-04-15 11:01:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-04-15 10:13:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yo quiero taco bell
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-04-15 10:10:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Absolutely, Caul.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-04-15 10:07:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for narcissism. it generates drama
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-04-15 09:52:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think you should derive some satisfaction from the fact you are probably normal shaped considering you have been accused of being fat and a stick figure on the same post.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-04-15 09:24:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by chitowngirl (user info) at 2008-04-14 22:31:04 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Nice Paris Hilton shades.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2008-04-15 09:11:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Your graphis design garbage, while shitty, was still better than glam shots of your shovel chin and stick figure.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-04-15 08:52:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You jumped the shark a long time ago
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-04-15 08:27:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You look like a man. Well, not a man, just an emo kid, but that's one step towards manliness.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-04-15 08:02:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
and technically speaking...you're standing too close to where the metal gates come together.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-15 07:34:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I thought this was an emo boy?!
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-04-15 07:33:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you could be an Emo Boy if you changed you clothes and glasses
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:36:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Nice picture.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:34:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
PUSSY.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:32:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
<insert false concern here>
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:29:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Let's not fight.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:27:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OH NO, I INSIST.
FUCK YOU. IN THE MOUTH.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:20:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck me?
Fuck YOU.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:16:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FUCK YOU BELL.
You poncy little fuck.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:15:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
See?
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:15:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Poseur, non?
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:15:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
CUNTY MCCUNTERSON
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-15 04:14:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
DUH
WEBSITES MAGICALLY NEGATE ALL PSYCHOLOGY.
Everyone knows that.
We are free to say the most horrible things to each other and DO - simply because we can. Nothing deeper than that. Nope, not on these internets, chumps.
It's all smoke and mirrors and make believe.
WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?
WHERE ARE MY PANTS?
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-04-15 03:48:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Because I can.
Just saying
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-15 03:45:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-04-15 08:37:01 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
I dont know what to say really, I think you play people pretty well on this site and get out what you want, i.e no friends.
Here for the attention , but its on your terms, so you can finish it any time you want? You arent 100% about your own looks therefore look for acceptance but conversly you have stopped the negativity affecting you.
Just saying.
============
Are you seriously performing some kind of psycho analysis on a website?
That's gay.
Just saying.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-04-15 03:45:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
will do Rob Berg :)
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-15 03:39:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Stay Classy.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-04-15 03:37:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I dont know what to say really, I think you play people pretty well on this site and get out what you want, i.e no friends.
Here for the attention , but its on your terms, so you can finish it any time you want? You arent 100% about your own looks therefore look for acceptance but conversly you have stopped the negativity affecting you.
Just saying.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-15 03:29:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by BeforeEmily (user info) at 2008-04-15 01:24:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.gabbly.com/www.ubersite.com/
Submitted by Off_The_Wagon (user info) at 2008-04-15 00:59:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/116146
Submitted by chitowngirl (user info) at 2008-04-15 00:57:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yeah, you whore slut bag penis eater. oh wait...
Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2008-04-15 00:39:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-------------
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2008-04-14 22:19:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I worked hard on this comment.
Submitted by BeforeEmily (user info) at 2008-04-15 00:27:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-04-14 19:30:25 PDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2008-04-14 22:19:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I worked hard on this comment.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-15 00:19:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-04-14 22:56:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You know you've got problems when Rob_berg is calling you an attention whore.
---
HOORAY FOR MY CULT OF PERSONALITY.
Australian crabass spreadin' the good word o' Berg.
+2 for you!
Submitted by chitowngirl (user info) at 2008-04-14 23:31:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice shades.
Submitted by chitowngirl (user info) at 2008-04-14 23:30:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"I sense great vulnerability. A man-child crying out for love. An innocent orphan in the post-modern world."
"I see a parasite. A sexually depraved miscreant who is seeking only to gratify his basest and most immediate urges."
"His struggle is man's struggle. He lifts my spirit."
"He is a loathesome, offensive brute. Yet I can't look away."
"He transcends time and space."
"He sickens me."
"I love it."
"Me too."
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-04-14 23:16:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i liked this picture of you.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-04-14 22:58:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I worked hard on looking at your picture.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-04-14 22:56:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You know you've got problems when Rob_berg is calling you an attention whore.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-04-14 22:30:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2008-04-14 22:19:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I worked hard on this comment.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2008-04-14 22:19:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I worked hard on this comment.
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2008-04-14 22:03:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
i like your hair..sweet blazer too..work it, girlfriend~!
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2008-04-14 21:52:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're very pale
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2008-04-14 21:23:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You look like you're 12 in that picture......
Does that make me a pedophile?
Submitted by SilentRenegade (user info) at 2008-04-14 21:20:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
totally a hump and dump...... or maybe just a dump....
Submitted by Registered_S_O (user info) at 2008-04-14 21:19:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No bitch, you didn't.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-04-14 21:18:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you're fat.
Submitted by Titus (user info) at 2008-04-14 21:11:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
What is that syndrome called again? With the big cue chalk nose and the droopy eyes.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-14 21:07:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
look, i've been refraining from saying anything well, because I'm no oil painting, but you are fucking ugly.
you have a misshapen bulging jaw, gross malnourished figure and you affect a cuntish attitude to boot.
good luck with the whole 'life' thing because you're going to need it you mentally challenged piece of shit.
why don't you cut out all the middle bits and go straight to a washed up chain smoking lung cancer ridden painful death?
k.
thx.
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2008-04-14 21:02:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
HAY I LIEK UR BIG SUNGLASSES THEY R BIG LOL UR SO TRENDY N KEWL.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-14 20:55:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
The Dutchess of Attentionwhorville stirs.
I wondered how long that would take.