Pope Tommy Lee (584 hits)
Category: PoliticsRating: -0.63 on 25 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by jasumthin (View user info) at 2008-04-16 00:55:30 EDT
The pope is a piece of trash. How's that for an opening? This pedophile protecting feeble old man is a disgrace to imaginary omnipotent beings everywhere. I have more respect for Nazi's than I do the pope which is clearly indicated by my choice to capitalize "Nazi" and not "pope".
He's a sham. A fraud. A phony. Houdini would have called him and his whole act "humbug". What kind of "holy" man, a person chosen by God to lead all of his people, hides behind protective bullet proof glass when out in public? You don't see Tommy Lee doing that kind of shit and if anyone deserves protection its Tommy Lee. A cock that massive needs to be carefully guarded and studied so that future generations can better understand how an ugly, tattoo covered drummer in a nothing special band of alcoholics and addicts could convince Pamela Anderson to fuck and suck on camera.
Tommy Lee has faith. The pope doesn't or he wouldn't be such a pussy. Or maybe the son of a bitch is scared of dying because he may have to answer for the things he has done. If Tommy Lee was pope we would have all kinds of nuns getting some dick. Sex scandals would be far kinkier and infinitely more interesting
The pope says it's time for healing and wants the church to move on from the pedophile and sex abuse scandals that has decimated it during the last few years. His idea of doing this includes shutting down churches and combing parishes worldwide to "save money". Little does he realize that not only will parishioners have to spend more by having to travel farther distances to churches that they don't want to go to. But come on, money? The church is one of the richest organizations in the world. Let's get real. It's not like the pope is walking around in $25,000 suits that he wears once and throws away. Can't they throw some money into the wardrobe funds so that he doesn't have to go out in public wearing bed sheets and beanies?
He's German too. Can't trust those fuckers at all. Goose stepping morons marching around torturing Jews and speaking not-English. I saw Hogan's Heroes. Who was always there to give Indiana Jones problems except in Temple of Doom? Germans. I saw film footage of them in history class from World War 2. Those people were so evil that everything was in black and white. How evil are people without the slightest hint of color in their world? Fucking Germans.
The pope, like his priests, are molesting us on a daily basis. The pope is responsible for gas prices being so high. At first it was hurricanes. Then it was war. Then it was repairs on pipelines and refineries. After that it was discovered that Burt raped Ernie and Grover filmed it. Mr. T gave some pitbull AIDS. The Church of Scientology kidnapped Katie Holmes and called it "marriage". That leads us to the only thing left that hasn't been blamed for the gas prices: the stupid fucking pope. It's all his fault. Everything else was just cover-up and redirection courtesy of the child fondling catholic church.
Then again maybe I'm just bitter. Maybe I blame my low self esteem on never even being winked at by my priest. I was an altar boy for 7 years and my priest never as much as held my hand. Don't these bastards know what that can do to a young impressionable boy's self esteem? No matter how many times I intentionally left my pants down around my ankles with communion wine sprinkled on my soft young bottom, I was never sodomized. Where was the church when I needed it?
Oops.... Umm.... OK, this is kind of embarrassing.... I just realized that none of that stuff was true. Well, some of it was. Tommy Lee has a huge penis that he used to shatter Pam Anderson's ribs. Churches are being shut down. Hurricane Katrina fucked some shit up. I saw that Sesame Street sex video on Robot Chicken. I am pretty sure that the pope is German and they did fuck with Indy in Raiders of the Lost Ark and Last Crusade. And communion wine stings to asshole.
In all honesty my biggest problem with the pope is that I heard he is holding mass at Yankee stadium. If he did it in Boston at Fenway Park I would love him. Love him long time. Fuck the Yankees. Fuck the pope.
Hail his holiness Tommy Lee.
User Reviews
Submitted by BeforeEmily (user info) at 2008-04-20 12:36:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BeforeEmily (user info) at 2008-04-15 17:16:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BeforeEmily (user info) at 2008-04-13 18:57:34 PDT (#)
Ranking: 0
your username sucks
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-04-18 23:33:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
>>The pope is a piece of trash. How's that for an opening?<<
Predictable and emo-y?
Submitted by Registered_S_O (user info) at 2008-04-18 22:11:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-04-18 05:42:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-04-18 05:42:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jasumthin (user info) at 2008-04-17 17:03:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i love it when people are so lazy that they cut and paste other peoples comments. how lazy do you have to be?
Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2008-04-17 01:09:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
It started out funny, but I thought it went on a little too long and became predictable. Nicely written, though.
What are they combing parishes for--spare change?
Submitted by Hookhand (user info) at 2008-04-16 17:55:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
They aren't combining parishes to save money. They are doing it because the non-denominational Christian Mega churches are so successful the Catholics are attempting to emulate them. Try reading a newspaper.
Submitted by icanbecool (user info) at 2008-04-16 14:57:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Old and tired, heard this sort of thing a thousand times.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-04-16 12:01:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
there were funny bits which were cancelled by unfunny bits a few words later.
nil.
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2008-04-16 10:57:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I agree whole heartedly with this post.
not.
you fucking idiot.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-04-16 10:44:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
There was a Pope Hilarius
seriously
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pope_Hilarius
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-04-16 10:22:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-04-16 09:56:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-04-16 09:09:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Despite people shitting all over this, I liked it.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2008-04-16 07:12:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I love the topic / subject, but this was not so entertaining.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-04-16 06:47:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
sucks. try again.
or better yet- don't.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-04-16 06:26:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by Titus (user info) at 2008-04-16 01:03:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
So what's the deal with airplane food?
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I like dogs, my girlfriend has a cat...
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-16 06:12:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Here's hoping, for your sake, that Jesus judges you less harshly than I.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-16 06:09:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-04-16 06:08:58 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
You called Motley Crue "nothing special."
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Motley Crue = Balls. Much like this post.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-04-16 03:16:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You are very miss and miss.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-16 01:37:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You are one random little fucker.
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2008-04-16 01:26:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I only read the first line but that alone merits +2
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-04-16 01:08:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You called Motley Crue "nothing special."
Submitted by Titus (user info) at 2008-04-16 01:03:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
So what's the deal with airplane food?