Beer, a Leer and a Queer? (with Camwhore) (2163 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: officestuff
Rating: 0.04 on 156 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Flash Harry (View user info) at 2008-04-28 05:37:46 EDT
On Friday night I went out with some guys from the office, nominally for dinner but really so that we could get drunk. The last time I went out with these people I acted like a perfect pillock (http://www.ubersite.com/m/115755), so hopes were high that I could redeem myself in the sequel.
Things started off well. I only made a few cringe-worthy jokes over dinner, recommended a nice bottle of wine for the table and seemed to be shaking off the 'drunken baboon' tag I gained so easily the last time.
After the meal we moved onto a pub on Waterloo Street, which incidentally is where to go if you ever fancy a cheap Glaswegian prostitute. I shared a bottle of wine with the Boss, who is an outrageous flirt, and conversed lucidly about job prospects, the economy and politics. All was running more smoothly than I might have imagined.
As I got drunker and rowdier, I began taking pictures with my mobile phone. This was being passed around for people to delete any pictures that betrayed just how fat they really are, when it happened. With a yelp of surprise, my boss' face flushed pink, and she stared at me. She had found the naked pictures.
Nothing too naked, mind. Nothing phallic, but with enough skin on show to cause embarrassment to us both (and mild arousal in her, I would suggest). I started drinking heavily after that, while everybody else debated my sexuality.
Later, as I swayed from foot to foot, I informed the Boss that she now owed me a naked picture of herself, in the interests of fairness. She disagreed, and I was left staring disappointedly at her clothed lovelies.
I danced around for twenty minuted like a maniac child on Smarties, made my excuses and left soon after. On the way home, and apparently not content with my idiocy, I phoned this girl I really like. I woke her up, babbled nonsense for a while and then got disconnected, thereby destroying any doubt in her mind about my lack of wit or charm. Any chance I had with her was abruptly extinguished, methinks.
The night wouldn't have been complete without a drunken mugshot, to be ridiculed in your own inimitable manner:
User Reviews
Submitted by loveinbrevity (user info) at 2008-07-21 11:12:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like your shirt.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-07-01 09:06:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
LOL
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-03 05:46:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I liked your last nigt out better...
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2008-05-01 10:13:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"everybody else debated my sexuality"
I'd get used to it.
Submitted by Fat-Sacks (user info) at 2008-05-01 01:35:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
That was fantastic, though there were no turtles.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2008-05-01 01:31:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-04-30 12:58:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yaaar!
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-04-30 06:36:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have a large black penis
in my mouth!
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2008-04-30 04:45:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What the fuck in the name of all that is holy happend here?!?!?
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2008-04-30 02:57:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Willy Wonka called and wants his shirt back there fagaroo.
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-04-29 22:57:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I think you meant to post this here: www.blogger.com
This is Ubersite. We aren't impressed by the fact that you're a drunk.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2008-04-29 21:28:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
queer
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:49:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know that sad noise a dog will make, when you slam the door shut and leave it in the house, alone for the day?
Well, I just made it :o(
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:44:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
please do, forward any pics to onlyifiwasdesperateandyouweretheonymanalive.at.inyourdreamsflash.com
lol ;)
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:38:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have. He said there was nothing he could do about it. It is because my willy is so shriveled and impotent. It is tiny and the sperm have given up and stopped sticking together.
I can send you a pic if you like? :o)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:34:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
fj if yours is powder, you need to go see a doctor.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:32:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hehehehehehe
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:25:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"mineral facepowder"
.....
Is that a euphemism for what I think it is? ;o)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:20:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
in other news i just discovered the miracles of mineral facepowder. why did no one tell me about this before?
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:18:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:12:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well this post had calmed down and it all seemed to be over until Bint re-appeared, swinging her piss-flaps about and arguing over technicalities
--
Again look below Harry. Berty and Orphelia re-opened this one dear chap. Not me.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:16:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:06:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
LittleBint this is getting really fucking boring.
--
Hahahahahaha
It's alright for Orphelia to do all this but not for anyone else? Oh I see it's all me.
And you should look below it got boring ages ago so you said.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:14:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i am psping at mo.
good god some men are gits. poor girl.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:12:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh and it is not sico's lauren.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:12:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well this post had calmed down and it all seemed to be over until Bint re-appeared, swinging her piss-flaps about and arguing over technicalities. But yes Orphy, you stop it too!
I am terribly sorry about the date-swapping...has it ruined the whole scheme? Yahoo still buggered?
The Lauren girl is a misguided fool who let a sleaze take pics of her bits.
Some guys depress me :o(
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:09:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
tell me off too fj.
you're date swapping is causing a headache by the way. *shakes fist*
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:06:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i would not say spiteful, maybe just a little wicked. i never got emotional enough for spite.
i was no worse than yourself.
what are the pictures on those lauren posts? is it the lauren posts? i can't see them on this memory not big enough. someone tell me!
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:06:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
LittleBint this is getting really fucking boring.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 09:03:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 08:56:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
how were my remarks personal to you? you are not inbred, are you? well then, i was never personal. saying that stuff has no basis in fact, like when i get called fat or a slut by other people. however, bringing my kids into it, that is personal as it is based on fact. i am sure you see the difference.
--
Oh I see the difference Orphelia of course I do. But despite you calling them jokes, at the time you were meaning them in a spiteful manner, you can say they are jokes and blah blah but you only changed your tune later on.
You can admit it Orphelia, you were only trying to get a rise out of me I know. It didnt work but you tried.
You see its like me walking up to Billy down the road and calling him inbred, even if it doesnt mean anything to him personally, you keep doing it you say it in a derogatory way, I get my friends to join in and you all have a laugh and yet there is poor Billy who isnt inbred at all but is now feeling like shit because some idiot has decided to label them with a stupid name.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 08:56:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
how were my remarks personal to you? you are not inbred, are you? well then, i was never personal. saying that stuff has no basis in fact, like when i get called fat or a slut by other people. however, bringing my kids into it, that is personal as it is based on fact. i am sure you see the difference.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 08:51:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 08:48:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i never said you were being personal, bint,
--
I was trying to point out that you tried personal remarks, sorry, Jokes in my direction, but you complain when Berty does it in your direction.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 08:48:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i never said you were being personal, bint, but our whole thing was childish. fun but childish.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 08:45:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 07:17:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh berty, what a surprising comment from you. And how nice of you to make it personally by mentioning my kiddies? What on earth have they got to do with this, in which, may I point out, littlebint was just as childish as myself.
--
You can keep me out of this.
Childish? if pointing out your misunderstanding is childish then ok. I never made any personal, or attempted personal remarks, oh sorry Jokes yes they were all jokes I remember.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 07:34:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
All I am saying squirty, is I may be responsible and dull and sensible in real life but hre on Uber, you can say anything you want. It makes a change from the tedium of my life. being the grown up all the time is jolly hard work.
*stamps foot and leaves, slamming door*
lol
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-04-29 07:31:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
*shakes head*
Forget I said anything. You carry on there.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 07:19:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ps reading someones e row (or whatever we are calling it) is kinda tragic :(
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 07:18:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i never thought littlebint was being critical either. ???? hmmm.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 07:17:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh berty, what a surprising comment from you. And how nice of you to make it personally by mentioning my kiddies? What on earth have they got to do with this, in which, may I point out, littlebint was just as childish as myself.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-04-29 07:12:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I do not approve of Orphelia's hackles going up everytime she percieves herself to be recieving even the most indirect criticism. It's childish and whenever I see it happen I feel embarrased for her. That she herself is 30 odd and a mother of 2 only makes it more upsetting.
I appreciate the desire to have little fights on Uber, but it's just not as funny as when Caul and Jack Maccallum/Indoninja/some other headcase do it.
Stop getting so emotionally invested in Uber, seriously. You'll only come a cropper just like everyone else who's done it in the past.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 05:25:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That's the spirit, Orphy :o)
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-29 05:14:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Meaningful debate on Uber? Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 05:13:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Absolutely no debate, the topic isn't worthy of debate ie an Uber man.
I feel this may only be ended with a bout of topless jelly wrestling and consumption of vast quantities of Lambrini and BabyCham.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 05:05:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
There is no meaningful debate here from what I have seen.
Why not 'Live Online Squabble Spat (LOSS), it's like argueing with a child only even more pointless.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 05:00:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i was stuck for another word. It is too childish for 'discussion' and not strong enough to be 'argument' and it certainly isn't a 'debate'. Maybe 'game' then?
Golly, you like to nit pick at every word. that *is* fun. Well done you.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:57:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I thought this wasnt a row? You said it was all a joke didnt you?
Now I'm confused.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:55:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not necessarily yours. You seem to like hanging around this chaps posts rather a lot though.
Dont flatter yourself. I am logged on here whenever I open uber up. Havent bothered to look around yet as I was having too much fun here.
Til next time Orphelia.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:47:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny how littlebint seems to have logged on purely for this row.
And you mean wait for my next post? You'll be waiting a long time, I joined another site to post fiction on. Sorry.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:37:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Just couldnt resist comming back though.
Too easy. Nothing new to say so you just have to say its boring and go away.
I am fun. This is exactly the kind of shite you do on here all the time, but because you didnt start it and it didnt go quite the way you wanted it isnt fun anymore.
Cheerio.
See you next post I guess. Looking forward to it already.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:34:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Now who is trying to be patronising?
I am done with you now sweety, you have the last word, I insist. Really, be my guest.
I thought you'd be fun but no, you are just boring.
Why not put the cherry on the cake and go and -2 my posts. Oh, that would really hurt.
Good day.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:34:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Nope
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:33:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Give it a rest Bint its boring.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:32:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:22:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought you had give nup littlebint and let me have the last word?
Couldn't you bite your tongue?
Some new material? Ugh, you are really at the bottom of the barrell there, love.
If you take my tone as patronising, so be it. I can't be responsible for how your tiny, warped, inbred mind reads my comments.
lol
--
Never said anything about actually letting you have the last word, just mentioned that I know how much you seem to like it.
lol, Inbred again I like that one, and I'm not at the bottom of the barrell you are for using the same material all the time. Something new, something made up all by yourself. Come on Orphelia we know you have it in you.
Submitted by Toshi (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:28:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My latest piece is up.
By piece I dont mean, well you know.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:28:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Consider it shut :o(
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:27:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shut it FJ.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:26:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Woohoo! 100 comments! Thanks ladies.
But seriously, the bickering is unbecoming and you are going round in circles. I bet you are actually very similar in 'real life'.
There is an easy way to settle the dispute, however: www.ultimatesurrender.com.
Winner fucks the loser. I'll be the ref ;o)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:25:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yay! 100!
I agree Toshi. Women. Pfft...
Submitted by Toshi (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:24:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Too many hormones on this post.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:22:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought you had give nup littlebint and let me have the last word?
Couldn't you bite your tongue?
Some new material? Ugh, you are really at the bottom of the barrell there, love.
If you take my tone as patronising, so be it. I can't be responsible for how your tiny, warped, inbred mind reads my comments.
lol
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:20:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:12:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Also, littlebint is a genius, she/he/it can see I am emotional via a PC monitor. I am amazed!!
-
Did you actually read what I said? I said that for you to want to comment means that you must feel some emotion, nothing more nothing less, it did not read : I know what you are feeling.
ahahaha
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:19:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:08:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
All that is happening is littlebint is trying hard to belittle me or something, like prove she is the one having a laugh, when really, we are both as badas each other and rowing over the internet is as futile as, well, something really futile.
Apparently, I am easy to read, because everything I put on the internet is a true reflection of who I am.
And also, apparently littlebint's life is so dull and insignificant she has to try and trounce an internet stranger with words to make herself feel better.
littlebint, when I went off about pale people I was having fun, like everything on this site it meant nothing.
I do not care about Flash more than anyone on this site, it merely helped pass time.
Since it makes you feel better, you win littlebint, there there, good girl, have a pat on the head and shuush now, the adults are talking.
lol
--
la la la.
I never said that your internet persona was a true reflection of who you really are, you're reading far too much into it. Just said that the way you are on here makes you pretty easy to read with regards how you react HERE.
I wasnt trying to trounce you, I never tried personal insults, that you now pass off as a joke. You made a comment and I disagreed with what you were saying about what I had said, due to some communication error. That is all. Life isnt dull and boring for me at all, I'm sure you will pass that off as another joke hahahahaha
Trying patronising me too is a good one Orphelia, you really should try some new material.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:16:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am having therapy. It had peanut butter and slices... of... banana... *weeps*
I am scarred.
:(
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:14:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Orphy...I...I...I don't know what to say.
You dropped your toast? Jesus. Did it land butter-side-down?
I'll pray for you.
:o)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:12:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Also, littlebint is a genius, she/he/it can see I am emotional via a PC monitor. I am amazed!!
What, you can detct I am emotional but not when I have a laugh?
STFU I am no more emotional over this than I was at the loss of my piece of toast this morning when I dropped it on the floor.
I am, like you, taking pleasure from a pointless internet discussion.
If it makes you feel superior that's ok with me.
But neither of us will look good because of this. Internet discussions have no winners
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:08:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
All that is happening is littlebint is trying hard to belittle me or something, like prove she is the one having a laugh, when really, we are both as badas each other and rowing over the internet is as futile as, well, something really futile.
Apparently, I am easy to read, because everything I put on the internet is a true reflection of who I am.
And also, apparently littlebint's life is so dull and insignificant she has to try and trounce an internet stranger with words to make herself feel better.
littlebint, when I went off about pale people I was having fun, like everything on this site it meant nothing.
I do not care about Flash more than anyone on this site, it merely helped pass time.
Since it makes you feel better, you win littlebint, there there, good girl, have a pat on the head and shuush now, the adults are talking.
lol
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:03:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hell what happened here? This was supposed to be a post that inspired peace and love and wet knickers.
I love that you girls fight over me ;o)
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 04:00:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 03:49:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Never even had a point though did you LittleShit, you were just trying to insult him.
Hahaha i thought the inbred remark was a touch of comedy genius but if you choose to take it personally so be it.
Responding to comments isn't 'biting' you silly ho, it is one of the things you do on Uber.
I like playing cat and mouse with people like apollo, I am sure in real life he is lovely and doesn't think twice the folk of Uber; throwing insults around here and accusing others of taking the internet too seriously IS Uber.
lol.
I don't think you have the slightest sense of humour.
Haha you said I judged you? Silly little girl, I made a joke.
Ooooh, I love venting my pregnancy hormones at strangers.
--
God you really are too easy.
Read this line it was typed by the little boy above:
"The night wouldn't have been complete without a drunken mugshot, to be ridiculed in your own inimitable manner:"
He invited ridicule. So that is what he got.
And all I said was sunlight is good for the skin.
You then got on your little pony of having a go at me. And come on between you and I Orphelia you were hoping the inbred thing did annoy me otherwise you wouldnt have said it.
I find it fun having a banter with people like you. Who scream and shout that they dont get emotional about things said on here yet still they come back and comment about things said.
If you didnt feel any emotion you would let it pass, but I guess you just feel that you need to have the last word. Yeah that put me in my place.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 03:55:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, I am sorry, here let me spell it out for you
littlebint = emission lol ;)
hehehe ie joke
I say every new user is emission, particularly ones like you!
I am sure we will be best of friends really.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 03:52:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 03:50:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
LittleBint = emission.
--
If it makes you feel better that I'm another person then go ahead.
You are wrong, very wrong, but I am comming to expect that of you.
Why can't a new user actually just be a new user? Because that is what I am.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 03:50:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
LittleBint = emission.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-29 03:49:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Never even had a point though did you LittleShit, you were just trying to insult him.
Hahaha i thought the inbred remark was a touch of comedy genius but if you choose to take it personally so be it.
Responding to comments isn't 'biting' you silly ho, it is one of the things you do on Uber.
I like playing cat and mouse with people like apollo, I am sure in real life he is lovely and doesn't think twice the folk of Uber; throwing insults around here and accusing others of taking the internet too seriously IS Uber.
lol.
I don't think you have the slightest sense of humour.
Haha you said I judged you? Silly little girl, I made a joke.
Ooooh, I love venting my pregnancy hormones at strangers.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-29 03:36:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:15:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't try to talk down to me, scrubber.
I am in the sunlight maybe 4 hours a day, and all weekend.
I am still pale as an albino. Or Nicola from Girls Aloud.
I don't ever tan, just burn, so I always wear suncream.
Some people are like this. It is called variety.
If we were all like you inbred, yahoo family, the world would be a boring place.
You can't tell a white person they are too white. Are you gonna tell Kracka he is too black?
GTFUO, twat. :)
________________________________________
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 12:54:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-28 17:46:13 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
you people disgust me below.
----
Especially me.
Personally, I don't get 'disgusted' or any emotion from strangers off the internet.
:)
---
HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
God you are amazing, and far too easy as I knew you wouldnt be able to resist. I wasnt talking down to you.
You know absolutely nothing about me to call me an inbred or anything yet keep trying one day you may hit a nerve but I doubt it.
And the comment to Appollo about not getting emotional about anything here really is a little much considering how quick to bite you are.
You missed my point completely but that is nothing new, quite a few people do. I dont know why you keep bringing up this too black thing, are you hoping that someone sees it as a really good comment and applauds it?
Have a good day.
Keep defending this little guy it's fun!
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-04-28 20:51:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So this Caesar-cut, bushy-eyebrowed brit is pretty much right then pandora?
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2008-04-28 17:01:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The only time an adult heterosexual male should drink through a straw is in the hospital.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-04-28 15:53:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FUCK YOU BELL.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-04-28 15:41:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
THIS IS FUNNIER THAN THE TIME THAT MR. BELVEDIERE SAT ON HIS BALLS AND PASSED OUT!
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2008-04-28 15:28:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
-1 Not really a leer.
-1 That's definately not beer.
+1 You're almost certainly homosexual.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-04-28 13:31:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You look like you just came from the set of a Bram Stoker film adaptation.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 13:04:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-04-28 17:56:31 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-28 17:46:13 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
you people disgust me below.
==================
wishes he was included below
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What, Uber elite, Uber elders, what ever they call themselves, chatting on a post?
No! They NEVER do that! lol how silly to think *they* would lower themselves to do that.
Constantly.
;)
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-04-28 12:56:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-28 17:46:13 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
you people disgust me below.
==================
wishes he was included below
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 12:54:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-28 17:46:13 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
you people disgust me below.
----
Especially me.
Personally, I don't get 'disgusted' or any emotion from strangers off the internet.
:)
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-04-28 12:46:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you people disgust me below.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:41:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I mean fonder.
my apologies for my typing today, I went out partying all night and my hands are a bit shaky today.
I think I have a touch of scurvy (sp?)
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:40:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:37:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.gekkoentertainments.com/images/dita_von_teese.jpg
Hey, Sgt H, you'll always be my number one. Alas, the oceans part us :(
====================
distance makes the heart grow finder, dear.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:37:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.gekkoentertainments.com/images/dita_von_teese.jpg
Hey, Sgt H, you'll always be my number one. Alas, the oceans part us :(
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:36:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I like pale girls.
I got a second interview!
Fucking get in!
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:36:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:33:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am not in a position to answer emails :( Will be soon.
http://www.nme.com/images/0735_140203_girlsaloud_nmeawards_wi_L050307.jpg
Pale skin FTW!
Hey Sgt H!
====================
guess who just made my day?! Orphelia... ;)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:34:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.hollywoodtuna.com/images/gwen_stefani_no_doubt_small.jpg
PALE!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:33:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am not in a position to answer emails :( Will be soon.
http://www.nme.com/images/0735_140203_girlsaloud_nmeawards_wi_L050307.jpg
Pale skin FTW!
Hey Sgt H!
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:31:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:24:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Pheeley, you crazy. Did you get my mail?
I reckon I could pass for Barney Rubble, Sarge. We could tag-team a lucky Wilma look-a-like with a cartoon fetish.
==================
Im always down for a little rotisserie action ->insert girl<- but who isnt these days.
im more of a "betty" man myself.
Leave those freaky gingers for the ginger kids like Oathy.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:30:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
'snooker player skin tone' - what Billy Connolly dubbed 'pale blue'.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:28:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You do have that snooker player skin tone. Like Hendry when he was obviously spending enough of his life in dark, smokey snooker halls to win stuff.
No excuse for cosmos.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:24:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Pheeley, you crazy. Did you get my mail?
I reckon I could pass for Barney Rubble, Sarge. We could tag-team a lucky Wilma look-a-like with a cartoon fetish.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:22:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:13:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know what they say Sarge. Everybody looks like somebody famous.
=====================
hey at least you dont look like Fred Flinstone like me.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:17:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
GTFO even. Lordy, I need sleep.
Oh, and lol at 'internet boyfriend'.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:15:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-28 15:35:44 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:27:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
leathery, wrinkled skin, prematurely aged, is si 'in' this season!
*Read - skin is so 'in' this season.
This is what happens when you spend a night in A&E with a toddler.
--
You missed my point, but then I didn't spell it out completely so it isnt your fault.
I wasnt saying that skin cancer and leathery skin is the way forward, merely pointing out that some sunlight is actually good for it.
I didn't mean to offend your Internet boyfriend Orphelia.
----------------------------
Don't try to talk down to me, scrubber.
I am in the sunlight maybe 4 hours a day, and all weekend.
I am still pale as an albino. Or Nicola from Girls Aloud.
I don't ever tan, just burn, so I always wear suncream.
Some people are like this. It is called variety.
If we were all like you inbred, yahoo family, the world would be a boring place.
You can't tell a white person they are too white. Are you gonna tell Kracka he is too black?
GTFUO, twat. :)
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:13:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know what they say Sarge. Everybody looks like somebody famous.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:12:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you look like a character from "A Clockwork Orange"
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:53:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:36:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know I've realised with all your drunken failed love stories that you're like a less emo ChaosJester. Not a good thing. Stop it.
=====
That's quite a harsh thing to say to this young man.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:50:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well yeah, pool is obviously more fun but there's something a lot more challenging about snooker that appeals to me.
Nah can't get it to work, I'll catch the highlights tonight.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:47:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
O'Sullivan would fuck you up in a second, guaranteed. The guy is a lunatic. Fuck snooker in the ear in any case, pool is way more fun to play; snooker is only good to watch.
Try launching it in the stand alone player, only way I can get it to work on a Mac in any case.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:44:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hate O'Sullivan but the manky bastard could easily win it. I've been trying to get the live streaming stuff from bbc.co.uk but something about the firewall won't let it.
I always fancy a few hours at a table after watching it on the telly, but then I get depressed as I realise its not as simple as they make it look.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:41:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
O'Sulivan has just made 147. Maguire is 11 - 7 against Robertson currently; O'Sullivan will win.
http://www.ubersite.com/u/ChaosJester
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:38:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't know who ChaosJester is, so I don't really know what to do with that. I just use uber to try and take my mind from the boring job I find myself in.
Did you see Maguire running 8-0 up against Robertson? I fancy him to win this year.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:36:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know I've realised with all your drunken failed love stories that you're like a less emo ChaosJester. Not a good thing. Stop it.
Also, you look a hell of a lot like Stephen Maguire.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:35:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:27:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
leathery, wrinkled skin, prematurely aged, is si 'in' this season!
*Read - skin is so 'in' this season.
This is what happens when you spend a night in A&E with a toddler.
--
You missed my point, but then I didn't spell it out completely so it isnt your fault.
I wasnt saying that skin cancer and leathery skin is the way forward, merely pointing out that some sunlight is actually good for it.
I didn't mean to offend your Internet boyfriend Orphelia.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:27:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
:o)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:27:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
leathery, wrinkled skin, prematurely aged, is si 'in' this season!
*Read - skin is so 'in' this season.
This is what happens when you spend a night in A&E with a toddler.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:25:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-28 15:10:51 BST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:05:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
oh and get some sun. It really isnt as bad as you have heard when used properly.
=======================
I am Scottish, so the sun (when it rarely shines) turns me a potent pick shade, not unlike my delicious Cosmopolitan there.
--
Please. I have family in Scotland, who are scottish, so dont try that old cliche. They don't look like they just dug themselves out from their graves.
----------
Shit FJ, don't you know skin cancer is the new black?
Having leathery, wrinkled skin, prematurely aged, is si 'in' this season!
God, what is wrong with being so white? You gonna tell a black man he is too black?
STFU Lil'Bint.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:15:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
There has been very little sun in the last wee while, and what there has been I have missed, being at work. Dark in the morning, dark in the evening.
Anyway, I am pale and proud.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:10:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:05:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
oh and get some sun. It really isnt as bad as you have heard when used properly.
=======================
I am Scottish, so the sun (when it rarely shines) turns me a potent pick shade, not unlike my delicious Cosmopolitan there.
--
Please. I have family in Scotland, who are scottish, so dont try that old cliche. They don't look like they just dug themselves out from their graves.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 10:05:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
oh and get some sun. It really isnt as bad as you have heard when used properly.
=======================
I am Scottish, so the sun (when it rarely shines) turns me a potent pick shade, not unlike my delicious Cosmopolitan there.
Submitted by Littlebint (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:55:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
You should really try to get over yourself, oh and get some sun. It really isnt as bad as you have heard when used properly.
Sorry but this was boring.
Submitted by Hookhand (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:53:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Why do you keep doing this to yourself? Stop it.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:28:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, I've been known to forget about having taken a picture or two when my phone has gotten into someone else's hands.
You have nice eyes.
==================
Yeah it is easily done.
And thanks! :)
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:27:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:20:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So why do you have naked pictures of yourself on your phone?
--
Narcissism
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:26:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Yeah, I've been known to forget about having taken a picture or two when my phone has gotten into someone else's hands.
You have nice eyes.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:26:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So I can send them to girls who are nice to me...or pay for them, whatever.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:20:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So why do you have naked pictures of yourself on your phone?
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:18:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My shirt is cool, and you all know it.
Submitted by Val (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:17:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
1. SHIRT!
2. You took your own picture.
3. It's people like you who make me glad I'm me.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-04-28 08:56:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-04-28 07:49:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It is possible that this camwhore is even more embarassing than Oathmeal's sock picture.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 08:35:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 09:34:40 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hanson are hot
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
gay
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-04-28 07:51:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
regarding the camwhore: good bye morning wood.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-04-28 07:49:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It is possible that this camwhore is even more embarassing than Oathmeal's sock picture.
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2008-04-28 07:29:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
2+ for having the balls to wear that shirt in public
Submitted by doctorj24 (user info) at 2008-04-28 07:15:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This -2 is brought on by the sheer faggotry being put on pageant here, not to mention the overwhelming amount of IM style chit chat amongst the Europeans.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:50:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:36:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh berty, you know me too well.
I am too fat to be transparent, though.
---------------
My mispent youth has taught me that one can see suprisingly well through a bowl of jelly.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:38:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
In a nut-shell, Drogo.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:37:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"This was being passed around for people to delete any pictures that betrayed just how fat they really are"
-
Hmm I see they didnt delete yours for you though.
Also this really had absoulutely no content whatsoever. Simply put:
Went out Friday, tried to be good, but ended getting pissed anyway. Tried it on with boss, got knocked back again. Went home lonely and raped my fist.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:36:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh berty, you know me too well.
I am too fat to be transparent, though.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:35:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That could be arranged Berty. Buy me a Cosmopolitan and I'm anybody's.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:31:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Orphy, you really want to see a picture of Flash making out with some other dude. I swear you're so transparent on a monday morning.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:31:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes, (s)he is very pretty. And sounds cute when sleepy.
Nosey.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:26:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just noticed, you put *really* in italics.
Is this girl you phoned very pretty? She sounds lovely, not minding you waking her up.
Oh, by 'girl' and 'she' and 'her' I mean 'boy', 'he' and 'him'.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:08:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Exactly, Berty. Going out and talking to people is one of my 12 steps.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:07:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 11:06:18 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
You do enjoy a good clenched fist, Orphelia, don't you?
Such a sweetie.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Get back to your closet, Flash.
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:07:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Only a mud slinger, sorry.
haha.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:06:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Toshi (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:00:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So you went out, talked to people and then went home.
Excellent.
------------------------
That IS actually rather impressive. Apparently in these stressful modern times 40% of children have considered murdering their parents so that they can be incarcerated in solitary confinement because dealing with people is so terrible.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:06:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You do enjoy a good clenched fist, Orphelia, don't you?
Such a sweetie.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:05:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What is Toshi's real account then, skully?
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:03:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmm, I wonder WHOS ALTER YOU ARE TOSHI?
HMM? MR IMA CLEAN UP UBER AND REVIEW WITH RIGHTIOUS FURY AND SUCH?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:03:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Erm, you have to like girls to be bisexual, Flash...
I am going to see a Meatloaf tribute act Sunday night. Oh God, I hope he sweats like Meatloaf and does the fist clenching.
Submitted by Toshi (user info) at 2008-04-28 06:00:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So you went out, talked to people and then went home.
Excellent.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:53:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Scented candles? No chance!
Well, apart from at Christmas time when I buy ones that smell like cinnamon...mmmmm.
I didn't know homophobia was your thing, Hurty. I am bisexual anyway, so it is okay.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:52:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ooops.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:50:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Flash also drinks WooWoo's.
And buys scented candles...
*cough*gay*cough*
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:49:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't care what it is, it's a fucking girl drink and you should be ashamed.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:47:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That is a Cosmopolitan, Hurty, and it was delicious.
Submitted by Toshi (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:45:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You remind me of a slightly chubbier Eddie Izzard or possibly a slightly thinner Peter Kaye?! From what I have seen on youtube anyway.
Looks like a heavy night as you seem to be sweating profously.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:43:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What the fag are you drinking? I bet you drink WKD too.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:43:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
left searching for "the good bit".
I couldn't give a fuck about your naked but not quite naked photos.
Pussy.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:42:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Scotland has two seasons: winter and June.
I have forgotten what sun looks like :o(
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:42:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, yeah, and that is a cool shirt.
lol @ skully.
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:41:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Seek sunlight, as it is your friend.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:41:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Flash Harry shops at Au Naturale.
Why is this not posted under 'Romance'??
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-28 05:39:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
:)