Anything that you wanted to be... (778 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.66 on 47 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by JesterLilt (View user info) at 2008-05-17 07:04:51 EDT
I was having a chat with one of my good friends the other day. He's busy deciding which OU course he will do next. Of course this leads into the time old discussion about professions and what we'd love to do.
Currently I'm an environmental consultant. Fuck knows how I ended up here it's totally unrelated to anything I studied or previously showed any interest in. Mainly I work with oil and gas companies but I do a fair bit for renewables companies as well. I won't complain though, it is interesting and pays well so I guess I've landed on my feet.
I hate reality and a discussion about jobs and what I'd love to do if there were no barriers or restraints kicked my imagination into action. Here's my list:
1. Mentioned in a review in Tigerlillys post a moment ago. I'd love to be a planet terraformer. I'd love to pioneer the human race's reach for the stars. I've probably watched far too much Star Trek but my No. 1 all time most wanted job is to seek out new life and new civilisations. I'm not sure about the boldly go, but definitely go somewhere on one big mad alien loving, strange planet finding expedition.
2. Decode the inner workings of the human mind. This would be awesome. It would be great if we all had little hats on or something that decode our brainwaves and we could have psychic conversations with each other. We'd play computer games with our brains and not our thumbs... Also, it would be great if we could download our neural patterns into big massive organic computers and live forever. If we're not keen on losing our bodies, build ourselves clones and transfer our thoughts into a new and improved model. Plug in upgrade packs to our brains, kind of like the matrix so we could learn things instantaneously.
3. Harness the power of dark matter. This probably relates to my ambition in number 1. Dark matter, I envisage it will give us the technology to travel large distances in moments and manipulate and counteract the effects of gravity. I think it could potentially change the way we look at the universe. I'm not Stephen Hawking but this interests me intensely.
4. Travel through time or across multiple universes. I used to watch a lot of Quantum Leap and Dr. Who when I was younger. That followed by Back to the Future, the Butterfly Effect and God knows how many other books and movies relating to time travel and parallel universes mean I would love to be a time agent or just be a tourist exploring the consequences of different decisions in different universes.
5. Splicer of genes. I'm not a big fan of all the ethics and morals surrounding the development of science. I think it impedes progress and evolution. We'd be making far greater progress against incurable diseases if the governments would let up a little bit. Apart from the good side of this there is also the more fun side. Gene therapy to splice a glow in the dark jelly fish gene into human DNA so humans can glow in the dark (done to a mouse already), nightvision, more muscles, wings... The list is endless, why stay the same when we could potentially make ourselves much better. It makes no sense to me.
6. Researcher of exotic diseases. This is what I wanted to do when I left university. Unexpectedly I ended up in the environment but I'm still holding out hope on this one. This one has some grounding in reality where the others are probably only possible in another time. I always wanted to go traipsing round the jungle, working out of biohazard cat 4 labs in a space suit looking at mad new diseases. Failing that, I wanted Dr. David Kelly's job after he didn't need it anymore. Although I would never condone the use of biological weapons or weapons of mass destruction, they intrigue me. I'm still actively searching for the right position with the UN.
7. Spy, assassin, mercenary. Incredible is not the words for how I would imagine this to be. Multiple passports, interesting guns, plot, deceit, conspiracy and crime. Venturing into the underworld, routing out villains and uncovering wicked storylines. Somewhere in the world, somebody must live like this and I'll bet their life is truly tremendous. As part of this work, my ninja capabilities would come in handy.
I've written this and realise, not for the first time I am a hideous geek. I don't want to be a famous sports person or an actress, a singer, a socialite, pornstar... I realise most of my aspirations are based on films and books I've read over the years. A girl I know once said to me, "Why don't you want to do English or music? There is no imagination in science."
To which I replied, "Bollocks, scientists have the greatest imagination of all because they have to dream about something before they can go out and achieve it."
If there were no restraints on you and you could do anything you wanted, what would it be and why?
User Reviews
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-05-20 12:11:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.topatoco.com/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=TO&Product_Code=DC-SCIENCE&Category_Code=DC
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-05-19 22:36:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/116824
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-19 15:47:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*pretneding to be all offended*
I used to live in the NE, now I live in Scotland and I am Scottish...
*twanging dungaree straps*
What's wrong way me dungaree straps like?
What's wrong way me save the whale t-shirt like?
It's not my fault I have a bikini line like an essex hedgerow and armpit hair you could bungee jump off. Au naturale is the way to go!
Fuck that for a laugh.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-05-19 12:29:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, next weekend toots.
Try to get a babysitter?
Home time now. Later girlies.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-05-19 12:26:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Use protection. Those NE girls are riddled with VD.
I hear.
Next weekend :(
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-05-19 12:23:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Perhaps. But I am spending next weekend over the border so I will get to compare them to the north-east's finest English strumpets.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-05-19 12:21:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No, FJ, they are not lesbians, just typical Scottish women. :)
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-05-19 12:18:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lesbians keep me awake at night...big fat, loud-mouthed ones...shouting their chops off...trawling for pussy...comparing dungarees...*shudder*
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-19 12:10:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What's the problem with lesbots? Not one myself but no probs with them...
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-05-19 10:09:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
who's a lezbo?
I am a guy, see.
**unzips and smacks wang against monitor**
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2008-05-19 09:55:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
COULD EVERYONE STAOP BEING LESBO.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-05-19 09:36:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you rock.
come away with me.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-18 14:00:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Gah!
It all sounds like far too much hard work. My boyf is happy and so I don't get my feelings hurt I'll stay away from the pretty lesbot ladies for now.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-05-18 13:58:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Before getting pregnant, I went to gat night often (my boyf would always say 'I don't mind if you bring one back' he was only ever half joking, I am sure) and they were all totally hot. Like skinny boyish but still funky hot or long hair, pretty makeup and slim hot.
Also, they are very into 'pretty lady bits'. If your tuppence looks like a dogs dinner, you get no action. It seems very cut throat.
Men are easy to get into bed, whatever you look like.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-18 13:54:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Butterflying... Damn you, I'm off to google that one.
Lesbots are not what they once were. No butch dungaree wearing man things. I worked with a lesbot once and she was totally into herself. Two lesbots I've worked with actually and they were the same. They were cool though.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-05-18 13:51:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
One of my bestest friends is lesbo, she just had a baby, god I must tell you how 'that ' happened one day.
She says I am too fat to be lesbo, or at least a popular lesbo with a hot girlfriend. They are very figure conscious.
I recently, while surfing for porn, discovered 'butterflying'. It looks very atheltic. We could do that while your boyf watches, but no touching!
:)
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-18 13:42:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck it Orphelia, I'm not a lesbo but for you, I'll make a special exception.
My boyfriend has to watch. He's stipulated that condition.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-05-18 13:37:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think I forgot to rate this. I love the picture, by the way.
YOU KICK ASS. If I was lesbo, I'd so be into you. Oh, and if you were lesbo too.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2008-05-17 20:45:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2008-05-17 18:41:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When I'm a neuroscientist you can come work with me.
____________
No wai!
Wanna have a co-lab somewhere?
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-05-17 19:30:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
100 years ago i would be a bank robber. 20 years ago i would be a cia spook. today i would be a pro football/baseball player.
actually, what i really want to do is to fly jets in the military, and in about a year and a half i'll let you know if i'm on my way.
Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2008-05-17 18:55:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Clarinet teacher at a university while playing in a professional woodwind quintet.
I'm getting close, and sort of do both of these things already but not really. I just wanted to share with all how happy I am with my life and the direction it's taking right now.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-17 18:44:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ubmitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2008-05-17 23:41:00 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
When I'm a neuroscientist you can come work with me.
=====================
I'm going to need an underground secret lab space then because... lets just say... my experiements will be less than ethical.
"It's ALIVE!"
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2008-05-17 18:41:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When I'm a neuroscientist you can come work with me.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-17 18:21:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Open University - UK
Submitted by jasumthin (user info) at 2008-05-17 18:03:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
would "OU" be Ohio University?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-05-17 17:45:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll write something later. . .
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-17 16:17:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The Doctor is the greatest. He has the best job in the world... take that back... the universe!
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2008-05-17 15:11:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want to be the Doctor.
Fucking awesome shit.
Limited to what's already known about the world, I would like to either: a) do some awesome, groundbreaking neuro/psych reserach or b) help a fuck load of people.
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2008-05-17 13:52:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want to be a science journalist, writing articles for New Scientist and the like. Some of my recent posts have been published in the science section of my student paper; it's a small start and there's lots of room for improvement - but watch this space! : D
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-05-17 13:14:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Also, you forgot #8:
Two girls at the same time WOOOO!
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-17 12:34:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-05-17 17:01:21 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't read this, but that's a really awesome picture of me, where'd you find it?
======================
Oooh, never admit to the ninja you are lest other ninjas come out and spank your hide. Tis ninja law. The guitar is a distinguishing feature as well. Cool as it is, you should watch that.
Submitted by Linus (user info) at 2008-05-17 12:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Banjo is a smarty-pants.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-05-17 12:01:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't read this, but that's a really awesome picture of me, where'd you find it?
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-05-17 11:50:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you fucking rule
you got my list down pat...
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-17 10:25:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by STIXS (user info) at 2008-05-17 15:02:31 BST (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't think #5 would work. That's why gene therapy has been, on the most part, a failure. To splice genes, you have to make them be able to integrate into host DNA, but when you add genes that can integrate pretty much anywhere - or at all - they either destroy the function of the cell, or they make the cell cancerous by knocking out its growth limitation function.
That's why most people treated for something like Leukemia with gene therapy died from many other cancers.
The method, however, is totally awesome - you coat a bunch of little gold pellets with the gene you want to insert (and I mean microscopically sized pellets) and you load them up into a gene gun, aim at some skin, shoot, and hope it enters some muscle cells to start making correct proteins.
--------------------------
The good old magic bullet.
I don't think it will never work though, I just think we need a better understaning of what makes us tick so to speak. I think we have the potential to be whatever we want to be. The problem is having little groups of scientists with big brains underfunded. Its a problem that somebody who can sell investements, cars or indeed anything is more highly rated in this world than our scholars and researchers. I think we should invest more money in our dreams and push for the skies, push to make ourselves better and strive for pogress. I think its sad we live in such a materialistic world that we value our possessions more than what we are or what we have the potential to accomplish and become.
Apollo - neural platiscity. Interesting, I did my dissertation in ADHD and neural plasticity as a result of long-term amphetamine use. Its a mesmerising subject. My problem is I never stay interested in something long enough to become an expert.
Submitted by STIXS (user info) at 2008-05-17 10:02:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't think #5 would work. That's why gene therapy has been, on the most part, a failure. To splice genes, you have to make them be able to integrate into host DNA, but when you add genes that can integrate pretty much anywhere - or at all - they either destroy the function of the cell, or they make the cell cancerous by knocking out its growth limitation function.
That's why most people treated for something like Leukemia with gene therapy died from many other cancers.
The method, however, is totally awesome - you coat a bunch of little gold pellets with the gene you want to insert (and I mean microscopically sized pellets) and you load them up into a gene gun, aim at some skin, shoot, and hope it enters some muscle cells to start making correct proteins.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-05-17 09:52:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
So you want to be Buckaroo Banzai. Can't blame you there. I think that'd be pretty cool too.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2008-05-17 09:48:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want to be a pirate or a yak herder.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-05-17 08:51:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-05-17 06:51:24 CDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have wanted to be an author since I fell in love with Enid Blyton as a young 'un.
me too.
except I'm good at it.
ZING!
Famous Five were better than Secret Seven.
Magic Faraway Tree ruled. Except when my brother started calling me moon face. :(
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-05-17 08:50:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i keep thinking you're a fucking man.
it's because of your camwhore.
only messing, it's because of Chaosjester - he's a prick though and I like your posts.
Me callinjg you a man is actually a backhanded complement, ask anyone - I despise women as a rule. Certainly women 'authors'. Won't read 'em.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-05-17 08:48:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i think pretty much all men in the 20-35 age group have these fantasies at one time or another.
shared cultural references/memes.
Since my other half has been battling MS i've got really interested in neurology and now in particular brain plasticity, it's got some fascinating applications.
Highly suggest this book as an introduction if you are interested (The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science by Norman Doidge), it's to do with brain mapping and more accurately brain growth and changing - although recent research has debunked the idea of localisation and specialisation of brain areas.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-05-17 08:38:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks. I am trying. Roald Dahl is my hero.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-17 08:30:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2008-05-17 12:46:11 BST (#)
Ranking: 1
I am working too for/with major oil and gas companies and like what I'm doing but am working on moving in an even more specific part of the industry.
We do a lot of seafloor surveying vessels and that's where the future is in my business,
maritime communication.
For fun I'd like to play more gigs, to entertain people for a couple fo hours is the best thing on earth.
Maybe I'll be in Aberdeen next month to start on a huge maritime project.
In conclusion: I am doing what I want already and it includes spacecraft.
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I don't go out on survey vessels but have been involved in my fair share of survey reports, seismic, ROV footage, sample analysis etc. I think you're right, learning more about the seafloor and beneath is exciting stuff.
Spcaecraft, massive maritime project in Aberdeen? I'm in Aberdeen - I'm curious!
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2008-05-17 08:15:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm sorry but its 8:15am on Saturday morning and i am too hungover to read .. that picture, on the other hand, is more entertaining than i can find words for.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-05-17 08:13:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
F.J, go for it then. You can definitely write. What's stopping you?
Roald Dahl = my fav kiddie author.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-05-17 07:51:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have wanted to be an author since I fell in love with Enid Blyton as a young 'un.
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2008-05-17 07:46:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I am working too for/with major oil and gas companies and like what I'm doing but am working on moving in an even more specific part of the industry.
We do a lot of seafloor surveying vessels and that's where the future is in my business,
maritime communication.
For fun I'd like to play more gigs, to entertain people for a couple fo hours is the best thing on earth.
Maybe I'll be in Aberdeen next month to start on a huge maritime project.
In conclusion: I am doing what I want already and it includes spacecraft.