Smell my office! (629 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.58 on 19 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Traxadron (View user info) at 2008-05-30 09:13:56 EDT
Walked into my office slightly bent from yesterday.
As a rule, I drink some coffee first thing in the morning, before I check my Email or my messages. I drink coffee not to fit in or because it tastes good, but because it turns my stomach in a recycling mode and facilitates my bowel movement. Its an automatic process that has been proven for years now.
So as I am sipping my coffee, I blow a fart, not too loud, not too long, but as it turned out its was lethal. Not bad, I thought for a Friday morning. Just as this happened, my boss runs in and walks right into the foul cloud that just left my anus.
ME: Sup Steve!!
BOSS: Moterfucka!!! Fuck!!
And storms out just as he stormed in. Yep, thats how I like it. Dont show me you Boss face unless you have my bonus check on a plate for me. Otherwise, choke and fuck off.
Sun is out, its Friday, pay day!!
All the best to all of you Uberfarts!
User Reviews
Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2008-05-30 18:05:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Fart stories rule. Maybe not +2 RULE, but +1 rule.
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2008-05-30 15:20:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
+1 for it being Friday.
Submitted by middleeasternchick (user info) at 2008-05-30 12:20:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wow, you suck.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-05-30 12:19:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Go away, troll.
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2008-05-30 11:10:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Doesn't anyone excuse themselves to the restroom anymore?? Nobody wants to be penetrated by your ass fumes. I hope you shit your pants the next time you do that.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-05-30 10:56:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Hmm, well, that wasn't very funny.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-05-30 10:34:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm disgraced to say there was a smile.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-05-30 10:06:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Owner of Apollo below.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:59:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yozz below.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:53:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:47:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I imagine that your breath is no prize, as well.
-------------------------------------------------
Shlongy oughta get cortizone shots more often.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:50:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
There's nothing to take the wind out of the sails of an angry boss than dropping the bat before he walks into the room. He's GUARANTEED to take a large breath before he starts having a go, and he'll either gag, or notice the little grin appearing on your face.
Either way, yo'u've won.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:47:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I imagine that your breath is no prize, as well.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:44:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wow. Do farts really smell?
I've never actually noticed...
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:28:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I farted once too.
more than once, in fact.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:18:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:16:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
As short posts go, I got a decent laugh out of this.
i actually did too.
Submitted by centaur (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:18:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You kids today just post for the sake of postin'
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:16:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No.
Submitted by stone8946 (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:16:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-05-30 09:16:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
As short posts go, I got a decent laugh out of this.