Yet another humiliating defeat for Frank the Bear or defending my title from would be interlopers! GEEK OFF! (502 hits)
Category: HumorRating: -0.52 on 21 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Darth "Frank I am your Father" Famine <Dork Lord of the Uber (View user info) at 2008-06-12 21:58:54 EDT
*Peers intently at you all*
Prepare to be awed and humbled by my list of geeky qualities
SUBCREATURES! GOZER THE GOZERIAN, GOZER THE DESTRUCTOR,
VOLGUUS ZILDROHAR, THE TRAVELLER HAS COME. CHOOSE AND PERISH...
1) Read my username here on Ubersite.
2) *Looks at Frankthebear while holding up one hand and clenching fist* "I am your father!"
3) I have recently bought a Park's Saber Double Helix with two sets of blades in green and purple. Clicky!!!--->http://parksabers.com/doublehelix.html
4) I carry a Palm Tungsten C with me everywhere I go.
5) I carry a 2 gigabyte jump drive with me everywhere I go.
6) I carry at least two 1 gigabyte SD memory cards with me everywhere I go.
7) Most of the time I carry a micro usb four port hub with me everywhere I go.
8) I purchased my hat on Ebay.
9) Sometime last year foxtrot published a strip with a funny crossword puzzle in it. I printed the strip and worked the crossword.
10) My dog is named Snuff, and he IS a watchdog.
11) My youngest daughter will try to use the force on you, beware she has a mean force grip.
12) I read XKCD every day.
13) Remind me to tell you the story about the woman that called tech support for her broken cupholder one day. Three guesses who answered the phone.
14) I have the original set blueprints for the Cantina, the Millennium Falcon, The Sandcrawler, and the interior of the Deathstar. (Yes I could use them to recreate the sets.)
15) Do any of you want to help me with a carpentry project?
16) There is a model of an Imperial II class Star destroyer on my desk.
17) There is a model of the Battlestar Galactica on the shelf next to my desk.
18) There is a model of the Millennium Falcon next to it.
19) There is a model of the ORIGINAL Enterprise on the shelf next to my desk.
20) There is a model of a Naboo Starfighter on the shelf next to my desk.
21) I use my Palm pilot to read ebooks.
22) I once had a statue of the pharaoh hunter, my kids destroyed it because they were afraid for my life.
23) I cannot seem to find my desktop, I'm sure its here under all this stuff somewhere....
24) I hope Frankthebear doesn't sneak up on me and throw me down a bottomless shaft.
25) I have network administrator access to all the computers at work even though I am not in IT.
26) I refuse to play MMORPG's because I will not pay to use software that I own.
27) Currently there are 2 cameras, a bajillion cd's and dvd's several screwdrivers and several sticks of unused ram laying on my desk. (and thats not all)
28) I bought a game controller for my pc just so I could play ZSNES with it.
29) I own more than one copy of LOTR Risk.
30) I got the Gold Chocobo.
31) My long lost half brother will come to me for help on a quest one day.
32) I don't have any spare dice, because every gamer knows there is no such thing!
33) I refuse to play third or fourth edition d&d sticking to a hybrid of first and second editions.
34) It takes me over a year to create a new campaign, I am almost done with my next one.
35) Indiana Pwns
36) I have more junked computers than most of you have ever owned.
37) j00 j3d! $cum put d0wn y0r3 lazorbatz and f!73$ m3 l!k3 m3nz!!!!!!!!!!!!!
38) Conner McCleoud's broadsword hangs on the wall in front of my desk.
39) My oldest daughter just named her first sword.
40) My youngest daughter is just about to throw force lightning at her older sister.
41) I've got $10 on the sith child.
42) The wife put her faith in the jedi and took the bet.
43) Each of my children own their own lightsabers.
44) They can use them quite well. Soon, one may challenge me for the title "Dark Lord of the Sith".
45) The wife just put $20 on the youngest child pwning me.
46) I'm not sure that I'll take that bet.
47) One day, I dream of starting a band. I would name them "Space Monkey Mafia".
48) If you can tell me where the name comes from, I'll give you one of my geek points.
49) My radio cost more than my car.
50) My LAN has a little over 3 terrabytes of storage space now.
51) Strahd isn't bad, he's just misunderstood.
52) I have been reading cracked since it was a magazine.
53) Ok, I'm content. I've put more down than Frank did.
User Reviews
Submitted by Darth_Famine (user info) at 2008-06-14 11:21:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-06-13 07:54:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
How the fuck did you ever meet, much less marry, a woman?
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its simple really
I am smart, funny, good looking, and I have a dick the size of an oil tanker.
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2008-06-13 15:35:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
NCC 1701
The A designation came...
ok... I refused to play this game to begin with and I am not gonna get started now.
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-06-13 12:14:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You win the game.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-06-13 11:48:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
urgh
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2008-06-13 11:26:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I did not enjoy this very much, but since I had nothing else to do, I guess you could say it was worth reading.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-06-13 11:01:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
30) I got the Gold Chocobo.
_______________________
Winner.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-06-13 10:56:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
47) One day, I dream of starting a band. I would name them "Space Monkey Mafia".
I will pass on the obvious cartoon and go with Billy Joel.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-06-13 10:48:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-06-13 10:42:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
stopped reading here
http://www.parksabers.com/
I have a hard-on
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2008-06-13 08:01:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
So what's the serial number on the original enterprise hmm? No google!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-06-13 07:54:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
How the fuck did you ever meet, much less marry, a woman?
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-06-13 07:43:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This weekend I'm going to watch football, sit on a dildo and wank myself dry.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-06-13 07:31:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
38) Conner McCleoud's broadsword hangs on the wall in front of my desk.
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Pssst. A real geek would know that it's spelled Connor MacLeod.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-06-13 02:50:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Gay.
Submitted by Franger (user info) at 2008-06-13 01:41:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
50) My LAN has a little over 3 terrabytes of storage space now.
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Pfft, the guy across the road from me has that on 1 computer.
Besides, half of this shit makes you a nerd, not a geek.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-06-12 23:48:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm not sure who just got humiliated.
Oh wait, yes I am.
Submitted by gascs (user info) at 2008-06-12 23:34:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
hooray, you're a geek. fucking stupendous.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-06-12 23:21:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Rusty nervously dialed the number. "Hello, Gay Hotline?" he said. "My name is Rusty White. I'm 9 years old. I'm a homosexual, and I want to marry a fireman. Everybody hates me because I'm a homosexual: Mother, Father, sister Sue, Officer Plotchnik, and all the kids at school. I tried to run away but a man tried to buy me ice cream, and I kicked him in the balls. I tried to kill myself but the driver stopped and gave me your number. What should I do?"
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-06-12 22:33:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2008-06-12 22:25:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ha ha, Bob. You must have that shit bookmarked.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-06-12 22:06:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/28592