home wrecker (650 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.08 on 29 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Mr Trollope (View user info) at 2008-06-15 14:51:33 EDT
i am trollop, and i am a cat. my breath usually smells like fish, which may explain the horrific smell of my farts. i stay up till the wee hours of the night trying to jump to and from every piece of furniture in the house. it turns me on to lick my cat junk in front of company. i have a great ass, and i love to stick it in peoples' faces while they are sleeping. i am learning karate, but the only move i have mastered is the gnawing-on-your-fingers-while-clawing-at-your-arm-in-a-windmill-motion-with-my-hind-legs manuver. i like to spaz out and jump in peoples' crotches, especially right after they take a sip of a drink. i run into walls and dressers quite a bit so i am sure to be a lil' bit off in the head. chasing my tail provides endless amounts of entertainment. i am part puppy, part stuntcat, part mongoose, and part tiger.
User Reviews
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-06-27 07:40:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
www.myspace.com/8553907
???
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-06-16 14:18:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Mr_Trollope (user info) at 2008-06-16 11:35:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No comment makes the baby bejeezus weep
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Oh fuck the fuck right off, you fucking son of a fuck.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-06-16 13:40:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-06-16 13:15:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Mr_Trollope (user info) at 2008-06-16 11:35:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No comment makes the baby bejeezus weep
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-06-16 10:26:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2008-06-16 10:25:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by Mr_Trollope (user info) at 2008-06-16 09:13:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ubersites not a friendly place, is it?
Submitted by Mr_Trollope (user info) at 2008-06-16 09:13:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ubersites not a friendly place, is it?
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2008-06-16 07:01:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Cat's are natures faggots. Cat owners / cat people are natures fag hags.
I hope that one night you think "fuck me I haven't had any pussy for a long time! The cat's ass is looking real nice today, and a cat is a pussy, sort of. Ah, No one will know!" I hope you rape the cat bareback and get some serious cat aids.
You deserve it for giving noobs a bad name with this desperate faggotry.
-2 DIE (please) - of cat aids.
Submitted by KirillovianShitStain (user info) at 2008-06-16 05:38:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Extreme. Extreme shit.
Submitted by TheBrad (user info) at 2008-06-16 01:34:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Gayer Than cum on a moustach.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-06-15 22:44:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Sometimes i worry that Uber's innate fear of strangers means that noobs get an unreasonably tough time and that it scares away legitimate talent.
Then posts like this remind me that the vast majority of n00bs are dumb faggots with less talent than a goat that has suffered massive head injuries.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-06-15 22:39:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2008-06-15 19:21:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Cat owners are just about as high on the annoying scale as Barack Obama supporters.
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Which is still lower than cat-loving Bush supporters like McCallum.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-06-15 21:21:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I love cats, but this was a tough read. I need to go do something else now.
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2008-06-15 19:21:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Cat owners are just about as high on the annoying scale as Barack Obama supporters.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-06-15 19:03:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-06-15 16:10:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-06-15 15:45:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Mr_Trollope (user info) at 2008-06-15 14:07:49 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meow meow meow, puuur skrapmetal's cat ;)
that has to be the gayest comment i've ever seen in 6 years of ubersite.
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That is gayer than asking to get fucked in the ass by a bunch of sailors.
And that is my gay tolerance threshold I'm afraid.
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2008-06-15 18:48:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I saw a cat on top of a house today. That cat kicked ass.
Submitted by tloshjohnson (user info) at 2008-06-15 16:53:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You are a cunt and I suspect, so is your cat.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-06-15 16:10:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-06-15 15:45:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Mr_Trollope (user info) at 2008-06-15 14:07:49 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meow meow meow, puuur skrapmetal's cat ;)
that has to be the gayest comment i've ever seen in 6 years of ubersite.
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And given the competition, that's no mean feat.
Submitted by HerrSchniedelwichs (user info) at 2008-06-15 16:09:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks for making me laugh, Sir.
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2008-06-15 15:47:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're making voices for your cat. What's next, drawing a face on a volleyball and giving it a name? Go outside. Hurry now.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-06-15 15:45:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Mr_Trollope (user info) at 2008-06-15 14:07:49 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meow meow meow, puuur skrapmetal's cat ;)
that has to be the gayest comment i've ever seen in 6 years of ubersite.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-06-15 15:38:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
smelly cat, smelly cat
what are they feeding you?
smelly cat, smelly cat
it's not your faa-aaaa-aaault
Submitted by Replen (user info) at 2008-06-15 15:14:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I liked this alot
Submitted by Mr_Trollope (user info) at 2008-06-15 15:07:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meow meow meow, puuur skrapmetal's cat ;)
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-06-15 15:06:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hi trollop(e). If your breath still smells an hour so so after you've eaten, you've either got an enzyme deficiency in your saliva or you've got gum disease. Please have the headless guy you're sitting on take you to the vet for a tooth cleaning and saliva analysis. Tooth cleaning is easy and you get to have the knock-out gas (better than catnip woohoo!), but an enzyme deficiency can either be genetic or dietary. Since you're a calico, your especially-well-mixed genes all but dicount a genetic cause. Can't be too careful, though, so have the tests run anyway.
You shouldn't fart. We cats are carnivores and with an almost pure protein / zero sugar diet there's nothing that intestinal fungi should be able to ferment into methane/CO2. Have your headless guy adjust your diet to that which is proper for a carnivore. Inform him that you will let him know when you need to eat some grass, as your hair is long. He may be unaware, but if he buys the good food at the veteranarian's office you'll need less of it and hence it will actually give you better nutrition and cost less.
-Skrapmetal's cat.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-06-15 14:55:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah ok. Not a TERRRIBLE first post, hoss.
But, still...
So you've got a cat.
LOLROFLCOPTRZ! Nobody on ubersite has EVER had a cat before! DIS POST IS DE WONDERS!
Have a bagel. And don't suck like I do.
Mkthnxbye.
Submitted by Aussie_em (user info) at 2008-06-15 14:54:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i once had a teacher named mr trollope. he was gay, and a cop. he left half way through the year. also.
-2 die
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-06-15 14:54:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jesus. I'm going to go mow the lawn. Good luck.