Well, that wasn't supposed to happen. (1327 hits)
Category: Business & FinancialRating: 1.42 on 70 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (View user info) at 2008-07-20 23:22:26 EDT
If anyone has been following my semi-coherent, panic induced ramblings over the last week you'll be aware that, last Wednesday, I put myself in hospital with acute renal failure. It was an excessively unpleasant experience and I can't actually bring myself to recall it in my usual play-by-play style without feeling absolutely horrendous.
Nevertheless, I'll try to give a quick rundown for contextual purposes.
Last weekend had 2 successive 21sts and over the Friday morning- Sunday evening period the only items to cross my lips were a single steak sandwich, a candy bar and non-stop alcohol, starting daily when i woke up until about 5am on both nights.
I woke up on Monday with the usual hangover and particularly sore kidneys (which manifest as a sore lower back), but i have had this happen before a number of times.
Come Wednesday, and a friend's birthday/ binge olympics, I still felt exceedingly hungover and the pain in my back had not subsided. However, i still decided to go out and chose to stick to light spirits in the vain hope that it was somewhat healthier.
Arriving at his house mid-afternoon, I drank a bottle of vodka over the next hour or so and then hooked into his ample supply of beer.
Unsurpisingly, I blacked out. Here's what I've been told.
We went out to the pub and I went up to the bar and ordered three bourbon and cokes. FOr the next 3 hours, I could not be seen without at least 2 and constantly challenging people to drinking competitions.
I came out of blackout at home, in extreme pain but without the mental faculties to fully understand what was going on. My entire torso felt like it was on fire and i was crawling around on the floor, gagging. It was around this point that I logged on to Ubersite and made some nonsensical comments about kidney failure. I was panicking and I think crying and just wanted it to be the next day so I would not have to disturb my roommates.
In a particularly stupid move, I grabbed a bottle of red wine from our kitchen and decided to chug it as a way to pass out and make it morning again. I blacked out again.
Here's what happened next.
My friend arrived home at around 2am to the sounds of me screaming in pain. He says that i was screaming horribly and that tears were rolling down my cheeks but, for all intents and purposes, I was completely unconscious. He called an ambulance and I was taken to hospital, apparently screaming, crying and unconscious the entire time.
That night, he stayed with me as a swathe of medical procedures went on around me, including placing me on dialysis to replace my lost kidney function.
I spent 3 days in hospital and the diagnosis is that, while I have severely reduced kidney function, it is not necessary for me to remain on dialysis. The upshot is that, basically, I have to return to hospital every three weeks for tests and am absolutely prohibited from touching alcohol.
Mind you, the doctor says that i may be able to resume drinking ("in moderation" he frowned at me) in around a year if my kidneys show some sort of recovery, which he said was possible for a man my age. THis means that, hopefully, 22 years of age will be my last and only 'dry' year.
This leads to a serious problem. What do I do now that I am officially a "non-drinker"?
More than a near death experience, what has been really upsetting since the incident is the question of what I am now supposed to do with myself.
I have these horrendous visions of hanging out with personal trainers, discussing our favourite types of berries and power foods and comparing obliques.
Or becoming a coffee snob, snorting at cappucinos and berating the barista for frothing the milk at 72 degrees when it surely should have been no more than 67.
Or, becoming a vegan and attending protest marches for everything from saving whales to nuclear technology, caught up in a haze of patchouli and weed smoke and self-righteousness.
Or, getting into art, or so into music that I can only be satisfied by a Brazilian orphan banging a cymbal with his tumours because it's the only thing that isn't "sooo done already".
When I get into this spiral, I think of just grabbing a handle of bourbon and going out with a bang.
So, Uber. What the fuck do you do when you can't drink anymore?
User Reviews
Submitted by regal1975 (user info) at 2008-07-25 18:50:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
had a friend in a similar situation.. Medication for TB meant no alcohol. Being the jerk he is, he simply used it as a tool to improve his life. He effectively became a lightweight drinker. It took him less than 3 drinks to get smashed.. Otherwise I saw go for weed if possible. It could be worse... could be a whole lot better, but could be worse i guess.. I pray I am never in your situation. .
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-23 04:57:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Or, becoming a vegan and attending protest marches for everything from saving whales to nuclear technology, caught up in a haze of patchouli and weed smoke and self-righteousness.
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You mean, become Hurty??
I have no useful suggestions, eat? I wish you well though :)
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2008-07-23 04:39:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think drinking would stop being fun for me before I hit kidney failure.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-07-23 04:18:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh and seriously Phallic I went through a similar thing when I was in my late teens, not the kidney problems but not being able to drink, added to that contact sports. Needless to say I ignored this and ended up back in hospital.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2008-07-23 01:11:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Seriously, check with your doctor before you try any other mind-altering substances, and make sure your kidneys can handle them. It would fucking suck to lose all of your kidney function while you were more or less sober, just because you ate mushrooms or something.
Which is not necessarily the same thing as being sober, but you know what I mean.
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2008-07-22 22:53:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (View user info) at 2008-07-20 23:22:26 EDT
My entire torso felt like it was on fire and i was crawling around on the floor, gagging. It was around this point that I logged on to Ubersite
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What the fuck?? You're dying, and you log on to Ubersite? I find that far more frightening than your alcohol problem.
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2008-07-22 18:37:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Lib (user info) at 2008-07-22 12:42:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Just write.
Glad you made it.
Submitted by iambetteratit (user info) at 2008-07-22 05:50:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't suppose going to the gym is a possibility?
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-07-22 05:28:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Girl's head = dead Portuguese male hooker's neck-stump
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-22 04:39:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-22 01:52:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-07-22 01:44:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My own performance doesn't bother me, but i find the idea of being able to focus on the girl's head profoundly offputting.
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Girls head = other guy's dick?
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-07-22 02:03:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok, this is the last one, I promise.
www.erowid.org
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-07-22 01:59:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, and you could try looking up Hawaiian Baby Woodrose seeds.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-07-22 01:57:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-22 01:11:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-07-21 17:19:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you will now experience sober sex. *shudder*
_____
OK, i find that idea terrifying.
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Are you blokes that bad in bed? Seriously... that's fucking sad.
I've never done shrooms, but maybe you'll like them. it's worth a shot, methinks.
=====
Shrooms are fantastic fun. They make sex incredible, but just a tad on the terrifying side at times.
Shlongy will go away if you call him fat.
It's like the blob and CO2.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-22 01:52:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-07-22 01:44:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My own performance doesn't bother me, but i find the idea of being able to focus on the girl's head profoundly offputting.
--
wait, what?
btw ranks don't count after the first one, right?
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-07-22 01:44:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-22 01:11:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Are you blokes that bad in bed?
____
My own performance doesn't bother me, but i find the idea of being able to focus on the girl's head profoundly offputting.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-22 01:11:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-07-22 00:27:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shlongy is still rankling because I had a go at him for pushing every bloggish post he makes to 400 reviews with inane chatter. It was some passing "stfu" thing because I'd seen his same post on most recently reviewed for about 3 weeks.
For someone that throws out as much random criticism as he does, I honestly thought he'd be over it by now.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-07-21 17:19:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you will now experience sober sex. *shudder*
_____
OK, i find that idea terrifying.
----------------------------
Are you blokes that bad in bed? Seriously... that's fucking sad.
I've never done shrooms, but maybe you'll like them. it's worth a shot, methinks.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-07-22 00:33:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
weed might just be slightly less boring that developing a world of warcraft habit.
but itd be close
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-07-22 00:27:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shlongy is still rankling because I had a go at him for pushing every bloggish post he makes to 400 reviews with inane chatter. It was some passing "stfu" thing because I'd seen his same post on most recently reviewed for about 3 weeks.
For someone that throws out as much random criticism as he does, I honestly thought he'd be over it by now.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-07-21 17:19:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you will now experience sober sex. *shudder*
_____
OK, i find that idea terrifying.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-21 22:53:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
WOW! A UBERER "gets drunk" AND WRITES A POST ABOUT IT!
I NEVER THOUGHT I'D SEE THE DAY THAT THIS HAPPENED HERE.
So you can't hold your booze and "blacked out" a bunch while drinking.
YOU DA MAN!
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-07-21 22:23:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
weed.
you are hardcore, not often i'm drinker impressed.
i've done similar in my youth - <salutes fellow soldier>
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-07-21 21:26:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm thinking of stopping drinking, I seem to be on the same reckless alcoholic scale that you're on, and the only way stopping will be possible is if I buy copious amounts of weed.
Being sober is just, well, it's just so *boring*.
It's the only cool cure for alcoholism.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-07-21 17:19:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you will now experience sober sex. *shudder*
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2008-07-21 15:05:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Drink O'Douls and use roofies.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-07-21 14:04:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, now listen to your Auntie Forensic for a second.
You're a young man and as such, you're expected to abuse yourself with substances. This is a given. One reason however that this is winked at for young 'uns is that your youthful bodies can repair themselves quicker and easier than old coots like myself. But gaw-damn boy, there are limits!
One year, sport, you can do it! Allow those poor kidneys to heal!
Just spend the time you spent on drinking on sex and other vigorous healthy alternatives.
And don't let your mates goade you into binging.
You need to hang about this planet for a while longer.
Glad you're on the mend! :)
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-07-21 12:53:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha, for a smart kid you sure are a fucking moron.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-07-21 11:18:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So, you drank that much in such a short time without eating jack squat and didn't expect to have such horrible physical consequences?
Wow.
Either you're incredibly stupid, or were drunk to begin with before the drink a thon.
Seriously, you're lucky that you are still alive. Guess I gotta give you props for that.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2008-07-21 10:43:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That sounds like it really sucks! You know that so shouldn't happen to a 22 year old!
I stopped drinking for around a year, all I did was smoke a huge amount of weed, by no means a hippy, I fucking hate hippies, vegans, veggies, tree huggers. But I love getting blazed.
I didn't even care for a drink as long as I could smoke, I even avoided pubs and bars because I couldn't smoke weed there!
Just get yourself an ounce and a playstation and you won't need to drink anymore, at least it'll get you through your year off. (you may need more than an ounce, I'm on about 1oz a week)
I have started drinking again but in moderation, reckon my psychological weed addiction will stay with me though. I honestly enjoy my drug problem though, I can hold down a job, smoke every day (at work too) I love every last joint.
Weed - WIN
Booze - FAIL
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-07-21 10:14:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Try importing and beginning a kava drinking establishment. I've always wanted to be able to try Kava drink, but it's impossible to find anywhere except remote islands.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 10:06:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think you're thinking about 'meta blocks' sam. they're pretty cool but don't deftly click together like the danish stuff. The kids love them but get frustrated, they're better in a weathering detailed kind of way, but the cunt's just don't 'stick'. All this great blocky stuff and you need a work-bench and industrial vice to make the little immaculately detailed fuckers stay together. It's like wanting to play Doom on the pc but can't be bothered installing it, so you relent and play the gay-upped psx version and curse like a fucking mentalist at having to use a control pad, but at least you don't have to download a soundblaster driver - you know? And god mode is only x o triangle, not hit tab for console and stupid dos commands.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:53:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
all things considered though, lego might work a whole lot better with spooge.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:49:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
stuff you idd. stuff you good, I'll watch the bledisloe with shandy. actually no I won't. My kids have an awful lot of lego and shandy's got that.......'predilection'. Clone troopers are cool but not if they're covered in spunk. and then there's that whole thing with my kids being kids.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:42:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ps. brisbane is a hole. live somewhere that doesnt suck.
like ipswich
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:41:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
okay?
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:41:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
don't try and sweet talk me bitch, you said hey let's hook up for a beer that phallic can't drink and watch the rugby. Then you changed your mind and conveniently wound up in melbourne. fucking forget it okay? I'll watch it with my kids even though they have to go to bed at halftime. Maybe if I get REALLY lonely I'll text Gordon Bray and say hey, Gordon, great game what are you doing af...<click>.
fuck you samuel. fuck you fuck you fuck you but i'll be okay.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:35:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
phallic has always had a bit of an aversion to me. so i dont think thatll be happening anytime soon.
i think ill survive.
plus now hes a teetotalling churchie, it'd be boring as fuck. i had to watch my housemate and main partner in crime give up alcohol for the mere piffling excuse of developing a weakened heart, and it fucking sucked
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:33:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
see what you've done?
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:32:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
look i see how it is sam just fucking forget it okay?
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:31:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
im in melbourne at the moment for the purpose of attending a lecture that was in the end of no fucking use whatsoever to me.
heres a tip: STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM MELBOURNE WHEN IT ISNT JANUARY
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:29:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
no seriously, forget it...
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:29:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
from brisbane. I know you guys can't come up what with you felching each other, just forget it....
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:28:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i was referring to you and pete, Conrad Aiken. Anyhow I see how it is, I'll watch the bledisloe with somebody else fuck you.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:27:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
im already watching the bledisloe with the tarts brother. but some other time for sure.
you in sydney, cos that would be a requirement
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:27:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
my mother partied one of her kidneys away.
iddqd story #327 of Why His Mother Is Depressingly Cooler Than Him.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:23:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:18:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you could try a girlfriend.
plus the lack of alcohol in your system will result in increased capabilities, you know - down there.
failing that you could try and stop being a homo.
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LOOKS like you've got a date for saturday. We're still on for the bledisloe though, right?
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:18:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you could try a girlfriend.
plus the lack of alcohol in your system will result in increased capabilities, you know - down there.
failing that you could try and stop being a homo.
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:15:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 Live!
Man I'm 20 and...well I don't think I have a 'problem', but I still manage to drink enough to shave off years of my life I like to think.
Here are my humble observations:
1. Whenever I'm either dating or seeing someone (read: getting lots of sex) my mind only focuses on doing it...not partying. Occasionally they mix.
2. Weed
3. Just work out lots...it becomes a high after a while. Even running
4. ???
5. PROFIT!
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-07-21 09:14:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I suggest you find an AA meeting you like and start going to it regularly.
I'm really, really glad you made it through that OK. Hopefully this will give you some perspective on what's most important to you. If what's most important to you is drinking, please go back and re-read the above suggestion.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 07:23:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-21 06:01:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This leads to a serious problem. What do I do now that I am officially a "non-drinker"?
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1. Thank your lucky stars you're not dead.
you know I've got to say, at 22?, I'm not sure if I should be impressed or mortified.
2. Spend the next year working out precisely how much you can drink to avert further kidney failure.
There's some method to this madness, it's risky but like softcore jackass, you know if you'd waited until you were a QC of some repute this would've made great reality tv. okay just reality tv.
3. Identify compatible donars in your family who will either give or you can steel a kidney from should you not keep to step 2 above.
titanium kidneys are rustproof. and you can't choose your family - fuck emotions.
4. Should step 3 fail, locate yourself a few promising black market connections.
promising does NOT equal lungfish. Don't confuse his being on the market with organ donation, you're not method's mum.
5. Get famous so that if you are at deaths door waiting for a transplant, the world will sympathize and you'll be more likely to get one.
Doesn't work. Look at christopher reeve.
6. Attend kidney failure charity events for posterity.
You want posterity check donor on your driver's licence. bags not getting your renal shit.
7. Learn how to remove and store a kidney should you need to carry out an extraction.
gonna be kind of hard what with you being on your dialysis machine. forward planning is key phallic, realise your limitations. Get one of those relatives you don't particularly care for to inquire at the front desk for hospice patients up in ward 3 not likely to need afternoon tea, and get the nurse you paid prior to lead said relative into the janitor's closet where she can stab them in the throat with a readily available scalpel and totally own their-YOUR new kidneys. I figure it's only a mercy dash form the janitor's closet to your room, dry ice is for pussies.
8. Look forward to the day you may get to cure your hangovers with a dialysis machine.
fuck machines. If it's not a decepticon fuck it in the arse.
9. Enjoy being the 'ill bloke' for awhile and all the charitable things that come with it.
Flowers. That's what comes with being the ill bloke. Gay fucking flowers and a sponge bath from a nurse. Unfortunately he'll be called lemon party cyril.
10. Be a miserable as fuck designated driver.
sweet. Bledisloe on saturday night. The doom kiddie and I will be ready at 6.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-21 06:01:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This leads to a serious problem. What do I do now that I am officially a "non-drinker"?
-----------
1. Thank your lucky stars you're not dead.
2. Spend the next year working out precisely how much you can drink to avert further kidney failure.
3. Identify compatible donars in your family who will either give or you can steel a kidney from should you not keep to step 2 above.
4. Should step 3 fail, locate yourself a few promising black market connections.
5. Get famous so that if you are at deaths door waiting for a transplant, the world will sympathize and you'll be more likely to get one.
6. Attend kidney failure charity events for posterity.
7. Learn how to remove and store a kidney should you need to carry out an extraction.
8. Look forward to the day you may get to cure your hangovers with a dialysis machine.
9. Enjoy being the 'ill bloke' for awhile and all the charitable things that come with it.
10. Be a miserable as fuck designated driver.
I think you'll agree with me that the above may keep you busy for a year.
Enjoy!
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2008-07-21 05:40:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
End it all. Your life is over.
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2008-07-21 05:18:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
have you thought about heroin?
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2008-07-21 04:54:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Go get in great shape, pick up skanks and become a sex addict!
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-21 04:53:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Take cocaine.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 04:51:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
not even method's mum....
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-07-21 04:48:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I had the same problem when female-kind told me I had to give up sex. At least you had someone tell it to your face I had to rely on body language and instinct.
and time.......good ol' father time..............
:(
Submitted by PukingDog (user info) at 2008-07-21 04:45:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, and until you get a real job where they test your pee.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-21 04:43:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dude...
I fucking love steak sandwiches.
You're going to have to become a stoner. Its not biggy, pretty much the same as being a drunk except you'll be sleepier, hungrier and less bouncy. Whenever you're somewhere with loads of booze, just skin up a strong 'un and toke away at it peacefully, til you're as wasted as everyone else.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-07-21 03:18:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I would rape your cat if i were you.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2008-07-21 02:13:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Go to the gym. Masturbate. Read a book. Fuck, write a book. Take up, I don't know, birdwatching or gardening or some similar shit. Go rock-climbing. I wouldn't suggest imbibing any other substances, as many of them tend to require adequate kidney function for processing them.
Or, spend disturbingly large amounts of time on Ubersite, clicking the 'Refresh' button obsessively to see if anyone has commented on your latest post.
What?
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-21 01:58:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Funky fungus, weed, blow
Just by the way, hopefully you don't think you're fucking Superman and think the doctors don't know what they're talking about. . .
Case in point you asked?
Ok! My former boss literally drank himself to death by 27. He was an asshole, so I didn't really care. I know that sounds really cold ... buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut he was a Fucking Asshole.
Also, you could take this time to either do something productive (of any kind) that makes you happy, or just do recreational drugs. (If you happen to live in Florida, it apparently means mixing all pills you can lay hands on forming you into a cross breed of retard, hick, racist, bad driver amalgamation).
Submitted by PukingDog (user info) at 2008-07-21 01:48:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ha ha, stamps. Either smoke pot or just kill yourself immediately. Or... I stop drinking every year for half the year, and here's what I do:
Masturbate (thanks Lungy), lift weights, do cardio, swim, masturbate, mow the lawn with my shirt off, make eyes at women at least 50 years old in the grocery store, just to see if I get any hits, generally get into good health as mentioned above and also by eating lots of fruits and veggies. You'll feel good and you'll get things done and when you resume drinking, it won't be with such fervor. Remember to masturbate a lot though.
Submitted by Desz (user info) at 2008-07-21 01:18:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Have you ever thought of the wonderful joys of stamp collecting?
here is a link to get you started http://www.stamporama.com/
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2008-07-21 00:26:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
In watching friends stop drinking, I can tell you that at least one of those things you're afraid of happening most likely will. Chances are 2 or 3 of them will. Just wait until you stop buying certain vitamins because you convince yourself that the gel caps are made from horse bi-products.
Fun.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2008-07-21 00:03:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
bury yourself in some other addiction or you'll drink yourself to death. get into something quick.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-07-20 23:59:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
;(
I didn't know your kidneys could even fail from that. Sorry to hear it man
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-20 23:54:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck Man, this shit isn't supposed to happen to young people.
I have lower back pain all the time. Could it be a Kidney problem?
I guess I should go and see a doctor but it's not that time of the century yet.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-20 23:37:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No. You impressed me with the quantity. Glad you're going to live, but this doesn't bode well for the binge drinking I had envisioned for us when I very likely visit Australia next year.
As for your question...I don't know...you could masturbate a lot.
There will be no binge masturbating for us, however, when I very likely visit Australia next year.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-07-20 23:24:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'd also like to clarify that i don't see myself as some amazing drinker, just very unlucky. I drink the same amount or less than a lot of people i know and they don't have these problems, so I don't need to hear your "I drink a keg of everclear a day and will live to I'm a billion" because I really wasn't trying to impress you with the quantities.
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-07-20 23:23:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
glad you're okay <3